[CONTENTID2]

#14 - NOVEMBER 5, 2007

DEAR YIFAN, [/CONTENTID2]

[CONTENTID1] I couldn't go to sleep after sealing the letter I wrote yesterday. It's sitting right next to me, sealed and ready to be sent but its 3AM and I've been tossing and turning ever since.

Maybe I shouldn't have told you about him... I don't know how I feel...

Damn you, Yifan. I want to get over this stupid, pointless heartache. I'm still wondering if I should tell you who he is, but I don't know why I'm hesitating. You'll never read this, and if you do, you won't care.

Actually I take that back. This reminds me of the one time we had a really bad fight. I thought I had forgotten about it, but I guess all this pain brought it back.

It was when we were both fifteen and I had a crush on this guys and your relationship with Wendy was blossoming. He was my partner in chemistry class and I knew him since elementary school. He and I were going to work on our project together which just so happened to be the same day we were going to 7-11 to buy slushies. It was a silly tradition, but apparently you thought it was more than that.

You told me I had forgoteen about you, that I didn't care. I don't think knew how much I cried when we finished our project that night. I ended up calling him and asking him to meet up with me. When we got there, all I could do was hug him and tell him how sorry I was to you. I didn't really explain any further, but all he