A short short update, I promise you the next one will be longer. :p

<3 Rin

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THIN AIR – CHAPTER 8

The day shifted fast into the fading colors of night, and the park was growing too dark without any source of light. Jiyong sat on the grass, exhaling smoke into the cloudy sky, watching the amber glow of the cigarette caught between Seunghyun's lips as the older man packed. Seunghyun caught him looking and grinned, finishing up to join his boyfriend, looping an arm around his shoulders pulling him close. 

"We should do this again..." Jiyong sighed, removing the cigarette from his lips to brush his head against Seunghyun's shoulder. 

"You like being alone with me in the wilderness so much?" There was a twinkle in his eyes as he joked. 

"Mmmm, I'd like to be with you anywhere." 

Seunghyun kissed him, before taking a final drag from the cigarette, crushing it under his foot. "Let's head home Ji." He stood up, signaling the boy to do the same. 

Jiyong stopped him a couple of blocks away from his home, reminding him of the events of the afternoon, only earning a disapproving scowl from his lover as he parked right below Jiyong's flat. "I'm not ashamed to be with you Ji, and you don't have to be ashamed of yourself too." 

"Seunghyun... I'm not ashamed; I just don't want you to... to get hurt." 

Seunghyun quickly held on to Jiyong's hand. "And I won't." He said firmly, leading them up the stairs to the fifth floor. 

The first thing Jiyong noticed was a brand new door, all dark rosewood with simple details. "Seunghyun, I told you not to go to the expense..." He trailed off, frowning as Seunghyun passed him a new set of keys, his nose picking up a strange scent. "Something smells funny..." He scrunched up his nose and unlocked the door. Seunghyun threw the lights on, unveiling walls white-washed in fresh new paint, a new sofa and a new bed, sitting on a low platform. "Seunghyun!" Jiyong was halfway between surprise and exasperation and Seunghyun thought he looked adorable like that. "Why? I told you not to!" 

"I know, I'm sorry! But I just wanted you to have more of a home... It looked so cold the last time I was here... I didn't want that for you. I'm sorry I overdid it." He pouted, pleading with his eyes. 

"You're an idiot!" Jiyong chided, but he was laughing, a pink tinge on his cheeks. "But thank you, it's perfect." 

This is the second time you gave me a home. 

Jiyong noticed the new coffee machine in the kitchen and gestured to Seunghyun, his eyes twinkling, "I guess now is the time where I invite you in for coffee to thank you." 

Seunghyun gave a chuckle, sliding with ease into the new bar-top stools he'd carefully selected, smiling as he watched the petite boy busy himself figuring out the instruction manual, lips pursed together in concentration. The machine come to a whirl under Jiyong's fingers, "Ah, I'm so lucky to have my boyfriend fix me coffee after a date... Guess my picnic plan paid off after all!" Jiyong turned to smile at him; the rich aroma of coffee filling the room. 

The blonde padded over, setting two cups on the table, before sliding into the stool opposite Seunghyun's. "At this hour, black with a hint of cream right?" 

Seunghyun was wide eyed, "Are you a mind reader? How did you know that?"

Jiyong smiled knowingly, "I'm a good guesser. Any other time of the day and you'll be having cappuccino instead." 

"I'm lucky to have you Ji... You're a lot better than my personal assistant. Maybe I should hire you instead..." A mischievous smile played on Seunghyun’s lips and he reached over to take one of Jiyong's hands into his own while stirring his coffee to a reasonable cool with the other hand. "And you, what do you usually drink?" 

Jiyong hummed, sipping from his cup before pushing it to the older man. "Black, no sugar, no cream." 

Seunghyun raised an eyebrow and Jiyong gestured for him to continue. "You're interesting... I'd have thought you'd be into sweeter stuff." 

"If it’s the clothes yes, I like them colorful.” Jiyong hummed, finding the words for what he was about to say next. “I had a..." He paused, thoughtful; "difficult childhood... It wasn't easy to get a cappuccino or a caramel latte. I guess I got used to it... Black coffee." 

"Ji..."

Jiyong waved to dismiss him, tucking his hair behind his ear. "It's okay... It's okay now," he gave Seunghyun's hand a squeeze. "I have you right?" 

Seunghyun nodded, taking a sip from his cup. Being with Jiyong felt natural, like this was the only direction his life was supposed to take. "I'm so glad I have u too." 

Jiyong asked a few questions about his work, listening intently as Seunghyun answered, laughing at the jokes he cracked. He was curious; he wanted to know everything about how his boyfriend had been doing in those missing years. He shared a little about himself, carefully avoiding anything that could reveal their past together; focusing mainly on the process of forging the ornaments he sold. Seunghyun probed a little further and Jiyong grinned, treading around the topic and directing the questions back to Seunghyun; the older man relented while complaining a little about how his boyfriend was being too mysterious around him until Jiyong pacified him, saying he wasn't comfortable with speaking about his past and promising to teach him how to make an ornament soon. Every habit he reintroduced to Seunghyun was strange and it was also comforting, at least they had found each other again. Finishing his cup of coffee, Jiyong excused himself to take a shower, tossing Seunghyun the magazine from that morning. 

"Don't take too long Ji, I don't want to read it more than twice." Seunghyun mused, flipping to the page he stopped at, giving Jiyong a quick kiss on the cheek. 

The petite boy shut the door and let the hot water run first, undressing slowly as the bathroom filled up with fog. He was lucky the accident didn't leave him with too many scars on visible areas. He peeled off his tank top with care, cursing softly at the ache under his arm. He traced the angry scar that ran from his side to his chest, fingers following the bumps on pallid skin that merged like an ugly artwork, ending near his stomach. He wondered how Seunghyun would react to this when they would have . Would they have ? Where were Seunghyun's scars? Did he have any? 

Disposing his underwear Jiyong stepped under the water, letting it wash over him like a cleansing ritual. Relishing the momentary comfort that the hot water brought to the pain. He thought of his doctor, telling him repeatedly to stay out of the cold lest the pain should get worse. Jiyong never listened; he had to be close to Seunghyun regardless of what it cost him. He suppressed a cough that the throbbing brought pressing his back against the wall, carefully regulating his breathing; he shouldn't take too long, Seunghyun was waiting. He shampooed his hair to lather and quickly slapped on the shower foam, letting the water wash them out. The moment he shut the stream of hot water, the thin boy fell to his knees, clutching his side. ", please don't..." His voice shook from the pain, "not now." He gathered enough strength to make it to the medicine cabinet, quickly swallowing two pills. "Please, please..." He repeated, "Please work..." Jiyong balled himself into a corner, hands wrapping around his sides, cold sweat collecting at his forehead biting his lip in a desperate effort not to cry out as he waited for the painkillers to kick in. 

His legs gave way beneath him as he waited too long for the pain to subside, his body and mind worn out long before the numbness washed over him like a warm wave. Still shaking, he dry lips in a desperate attempt to moisten them, turning to check the clock. Fifty minutes, that was how long it took for the pills to kick in; a month ago it had been half an hour. Jiyong carefully hoisted himself up, mentally registering that he'd have to either run to the drugstore or make a call to his old dealer for something stronger if he didn't want another visit to the hospital anytime soon. 

He the faucet, bringing cool water to his face to fight off the fogginess. His tired reflection stared back at him from the mirror, eyes hollow and skin pale; Jiyong touched his cheek slowly, certain that he had lost weight again. He sighed, making a face in the mirror, he looked ghastly. Deciding that he didn't want to look at himself anymore, the boy turned his back and grabbed his towel, hastily drying himself off. He slipped into a too big sweater and boxer shorts, blow-drying his hair with his back still against the mirror. 

When he was done he padded out slowly, nervously biting his lower lip. He wondered if Seunghyun heard anything, cursing under his breath at the bad timing. "Seunghyun?" He called softly, half afraid, "you still here?" Turning the corner Jiyong noticed the tall figure slumped over the table, head resting on his arm, the magazine rustling softly with his deep breathing, Seunghyun had fallen asleep. Jiyong's face softened as he bent close to observe his boyfriend's face, fingers caressing stray strands of hair away from a peaceful face. "Hyun..." 

The taller man shifted to wake at the sound of his name, "mm, Ji? Sorry..." He whispered, a sheepish smile on his face, speech thick with sleep. 

Jiyong smiled, shaking his head "it's okay, you must be tired..." Seunghyun mumbled something along the lines of jet lag, burying his head further into his arm, leaning towards Jiyong to let him his hair. "You'll catch a cold sleeping here," Jiyong chided. 

"But I'm sleepy babe..." 

Jiyong crouched down, meeting Seunghyun's eyes. "You want to come to bed?" 

Seunghyun smiled, eyes closed and dimples showing. "With you?" 

Jiyong laughed, he knew that cheeky look. "Yes, with me." He caressed Seunghyun's cheek, musing at how much he looked like a child. 

"Ji?" Seunghyun sat up suddenly, taking Jiyong's hands. "Your hands are cold, are you alright?" 

"I'm fine, it's because I just showered. Come, let's go to bed." Seunghyun looked doubtful at first, but Jiyong gave him a reassuring smile, gently nudging him to stand. "The invitation's only open for ten minutes Hyun, after that you only get the table or the floor." He laughed, tossing Seunghyun one of his old sweaters and slacks, before sliding under the covers. 

Seunghyun grinned and took them, "I’d rather be warm beside you…" He remarked, heading to the bathroom to wash up and change. When he was done he sat by the bed beside Jiyong, who rose lazily, propping himself up. 

"What?" Jiyong asked when Seunghyun made a face. 

"I'm afraid to ask who was the previous owner of these..." He grimaced, pinching the collar of the tie-dye sweater.

"An ex-boyfriend obviously." Jiyong rolled his eyes and laughed, unwilling to share the joke. 

Seunghyun pouted and sidled closer, "at least they fit perfect." 

They would, they're yours, idiot.

Jiyong stifled another laugh and laid down, tiredness taking over, urging the older man to do the same. 

"Ji..." Seunghyun pressed the smaller body close, letting Jiyong slip a hand over his waist. "Call me that again?" 

"What love?" Jiyong mumbled sleepily, his body feeling far too heavy from the bout of pain before. 

" ‘Hyun’, it's the first time you called me that. I like it." 

Jiyong smiled against Seunghyun's chest, snuggling closer, wanting to be wrapped up in the warmth that he longed for. For the first time since the accident he felt safe, secure and far away from the nightmares that plagued him. Everything else was secondary, the pain was secondary, he was secondary and the past could wait. Seunghyun was here and that was all that mattered. "Hyun..." He whispered, the use of the old nickname felt like a prayer to him. "Stay close to me." 

Seunghyun tucked his lover's hair behind his ear, "I love the way you say that." He tilted his head to kiss the boy's cheek, smiling when Jiyong let out a soft chuckle. "You're so beautiful..." 

"Mmm, and tired." 

"And cold..." he pressed a hand against Jiyong's forehead, feeling the boy shiver. "Are you sure-" 

"G'night Hyun..." 

Seunghyun laughed in exasperation, giving up his probing. He was probably overreacting, Jiyong was probably right about the shower. "Goodnight Ji." He whispered, lazily the back of Jiyong's head. "I love you..." All he gotten in response was a soft hum of agreement before Jiyong's breathing evened out into sleep. He shifted a little to allow Jiyong a more comfortable position only to have the smaller body immediately sidle closer, seeking warmth. Seunghyun smiled, running fingers through soft hair, pressing a chaste kiss atop his boyfriend's head. He watched him until he was certain that Jiyong was deep in sleep, shifting again to make sure. Seunghyun yawned, rubbing his now heavy eyelids, he took a quick last peek at the boy beside him before shutting his eyes, giving in to sleep and possibly the concept of better dreams now that Jiyong was in his arms.