My head hit the pavement. Before I understand what was happening someone pushed me against the wall and I hit my head again. Everything was spinning and my vision was blurred. ‘Who is that Zico? Your new ?’ the person that pushed me on the wall asked and grabbed me by my neck to hold me on place. I must have hit my head pretty hard because I couldn’t move.

‘I am a indeed but I am not his .’ I said in English adding some British accent. The guy stared at me. Behind him Zico was fighting with four other guys. ‘Who the hell are you?’ I asked the guy in front me.

‘I am Taemin and now you are facing the pure awesomeness of Shinee.’

‘Shiinee? From Star Museum?’ Through my blurred vision I saw him nod. ‘Do you know who Lycoris P?’ another nod. He looked kind a confused now. ‘Then you should know that the girl here is their leader and you should get lost before I kick your .’ He started laughing like I said the funniest thing ever. I felt that I could now move my hand and slowly slipped it in my pocket.

‘Then you should have a tattoo.’ He said and pulled up mu shirt revealing the purple spider lily with silver stalk. He froze on one place staring at the tattoo. Behind him Zico was still holding up but it wouldn’t last long. It was four against one. I felt anger. I don’t know why. Maybe because Zico wasn’t answering my expectations.

With the speed of light I took the knife out my pocket, one click and the blade was out and I made one “X” on Taemin’s hand. He yelled in pain and let go of me. With another click the blade was gone and the knife was again in my pocket. I ran like a cat to one of the boys, drove a fist into his stomach and then kicked him on the ground. Everyone stopped fighting and stared. Rest of Shinee quickly helped their two members and ran away.

‘That was sick! From where did you take that knife out? How can you move so fast?’ Zico started asking questions. I held my hand to stop him and collapsed on the ground. The whole world was spinning and I finally felt something hot run down at the side of my cheek. I felt myself being lifted up bridal style.

‘Yah! Let go I can walk. I just need some time.’  My voice sounded weak and even I didn’t believe myself. Zico carried me to his house. I didn’t want to go in but I wasn’t going to tell him our password so I had to deal with that. He put me down on his sofa and went in the kitchen. My vision was starting to clear. I felt something cold against my head and turned around to see Zico clearing the wand on my head.

‘You didn’t answer my questions.’ He said putting an ice pack on my head.

‘I rarely go out without a knife or other weapon. I have trained a lot but I get that fast only when I am angry.’ He looked amused.

‘Why were you angry? Because I was getting beaten?’ he smirked.

‘I think I was expecting more from a guy that succeeded in pushing me on the ground.’ He was ready to say something when the doorbell rang and Kyung, U- kwon and B- bomb invited themselves in.

‘What happened?’ asked Kyung switching places with Zico.

‘We got in a fight with Shinee.’ Zico explained. ‘Did they hurt you?’ U-kwon asked sitting down on my other side.

‘I think it is only that wound on her forehead.’ Kyung said examining me. Forehead? Then why does the back of my head hurt. ‘It goes?’ Kyung was surprised. Did I say that out loud? Kyung moved the icepack there.

‘Have you eaten?’ suddenly Zico asked and the rest nodded. ‘Than I will make ramen for me and L.’

‘YAH! I am not hungry! And who told you that you can call me L?!’ I was so loud that Yona would be proud of me. But that only made my head hurt more. I was getting pissed off so I stood up. ‘I am going home.’ I announced but I couldn’t make even one step because I was pulled down in Kyung’s lap.

‘You need to eat.’ Kyung started. ‘When was the last time you eater? Before eighteen hours?’ I thought about it.

‘Well I remember that I ate the popcorn that Zico threw on me.’ Kyung gave me a look.

‘Wait, when was that? Why did I miss it?’ asked U-kwon. On the sofa next to him B-bomb had an expression that was asking the same thing.

‘You were in… somewhere with Yoon and B-bomb was on the floor laughing his off along with Sohee.’ I explained. Zico walked in the room with two bowls in hand.

‘Let me feed you!’ both Kyung and U-kwon said and I glared at both of them. I took the bowl from Zico and silently started eating. I didn’t know I was so hungry but I ate the ramen within seconds. As soon as I was finished I got up to leave. ’Don’t move much you are hurt!’ Kyung tried to pull me down again but I slipped away.

‘NO! I am fine. I have gone through much worse things.’

‘Is that so? Than come to the club with us.’ Zico was smirking in front me. It would be hell for me there! My head will burst and I will have to admit that I am hurt. Then again that is exactly what he wants. So…

‘Alright but I will call some of the girls.’ ‘Fine with me.’ That stupid smirk wasn’t falling from his face! ‘I will have to go change then.’

‘Can we come too?’ U-kwon asked jumping up and down on the couch. ‘No!’ I started going for the door when U- kwon jumped in front me with puppy dog eyes. I spun on my heels and ran up for Zico’s room. I was sure I left my window open.

‘Don’t you dare go in there!’ I heard Zico’s yells but it was too late I had already opened the door.

‘HOLY COW! Why the hell did Hello Kitty puke on your room?!’ Everything was pink! The door was viciously shut in my face. Zico was panting next to me leaning on the door frame. I felt the blood rush to my face. Why the hell did he look so y so suddenly?... Why did I say that? About him? I am getting confused.

‘Says the Pucca fangirl.’ He said taking a deep breath. He is right. I have no right to say that since I am the same.

‘True enough. Now make U-kwon move so that I could go home.’ He nodded and we went down. I really hope he didn’t see the blush or thought or was from the running or I was having a fever. I don’t want him to tease me about that.

I safely went home. On the way I called Nana and told her everything. Grandma wasn’t at home so I serviced myself a packet of biscuits. That ramen opened my appétit. I took a handful of pain kills and continued with the biscuits on the kitchen table while talking with Nana. Only she, Sohee and Yoon were available so I decided to go for it. I told her that tonight we were going to be Lycoris P because we may run into Shinee again. I finished the biscuits, said good bye to Nana and went to take shower. When I opened the door to my room I was greeted with the sight of Zico lying on my bed, Kyung observing the walls, B-bomb going through my CDs and U- kwon on the balcony. I shook my head, took my cloths and went in the bathroom. Obviously I did leave the window open. I put the already full laundry basket in front the door and took a shower. It filled the room with the smell of grapefruit.

After that I dressed in black leggings, black tank top that shows my tattoo and purple tunic with lilies, a padlock and a skull. I tied the tunic to one side so that it showed my tattoo. I dried my hair, put on a letter jacket and went out to put on makeup. I ignored the boys and started applying makeup. I made it go from black trough purple to pink. After that I put on purple lipstick and looked at the mirror to see the whole look. My face was completely changed and I was really satisfied. I put my hair in a ponytail and started putting my earrings. I have four on my left ear and five on the right. I had a pair of skulls and a pair of stars the rest were clips. Third and fort clip on my right ear were connected with a chain.

‘I am ready.’ I announced turning to the guys. They were staring at me.

‘If I hadn’t seen this with my own eyes I wouldn’t believe that is you. You know I think you'd better direct that beauty somewhere else, you'll set the carpet on fire.’ Kyung said giving me one of his greasy smiles. ‘Will the others look like that too?’ U-kwon asked looking like a happy kitty. ‘Who is coming again?’ B- bomb asked. I expected Zico to ask something too but he just stood up from my bed.

‘Thank you Kyung. Nana, Sohee and Yoon better look like that because I told them we are Lycoris P tonight.’ The door bell rang. We all went down to see the three girls dressed almost the same as me. Only the colors and applications were different.

‘Please no pick up lines tonight!’ said Sohee the moment she saw Kyung and we all laughed.

‘Fine but only if you introduce yourselves properly like how we did.’ He said and the girls looked at me.

‘Well Zico knows Yongguk hyung, my real name and we are in truce so… ’ we stepped in line and in one voice said. ‘’Annyeonghaseyo Lycoris P eepneedah.’

‘I am leader Kim Lijung. My nickname is Crimum it means purple spider lily.’

‘I am right hand girl Ahn Nayoung. My nickname is Quilete it means love-lies- bleeding. You can call me Qui tonight.’ Nana said giving some aegyo.

‘I am Kwon Sohee. My nickname is Hydrangea and it means heartlessness. If we meet SNSD tonight you will know why they call me that.’ She wasn’t in a mood I think I should have kept some biscuits for her.

On the other hand Yoon was in extremely good mood. ‘I am the hart of Lycoris Kwon Yoon. My nick name is Viscoria it means invitation to dance. I am Sohee’s sister. I guess the rest will introduce themselves next time we see each other.’ Sohee glared at her to stop talking but she continued. ‘Let’s get going shall we. The unnis are at the flower shop and after that have to go to the greenhouse and the maknaes have homework. Where is the rest of Block B?’

‘Are you high on sugar?’ I asked and she shook her head but behind her Sohee nodded.

‘They said they were tired. But I am guessing that some of them got grounder. ‘U-kwon said as cheerfully as Yoon.

‘You mean they have parents to ground them?’ she asked and the boys were left a little bit confused.

‘Ignore her. We have spent half of our lives without parents and now she think that everyone else is like that.’ Sohee said. We kept walking to the club. Everyone was in a good mood except Zico. I could tell he was angry and lost in his thoughts. Was it about the fight or did something happen while I was in the bathroom? I kept a poker face all the way to the club. The girls didn’t bother to cheer me up; they know I am usually like that when the panic attack is close.

The club was full again. With the entering my eyes started scanning the crowd. Suddenly my eyes stopped on someone’s blond head. It was a girl around my age. I couldn’t see her face but see was wearing shorts and for a second I thought I saw a tattoo on her thigh- heart with wings and a little ball. I started shaking. The girl was gone in seconds but I couldn’t that image out of my head. I must be imagining. I felt someone take my hand. It was Nana. Sohee and Yoon were already on the dance floor. We went to Block B’s VIP box and I found myself squished between Zico and Nana. B-bomb and U-kwon had too disappeared to the dance floor.’ I feel like I am on a bad double date.’ I said and that made Kyung and Nana laugh. Zico jumped like he had just been woken up. I didn’t bother to laugh along because I was still shaking. Nana threw her leg over mine and took my hands in hers.

‘So are you two officially dating now?’ Nana joked.

‘What!? Of course they aren’t! If Crinum was about to start dating someone from Block B it would be me.’ Kyung said with a smile.

‘No way.’ Surprisingly that was Zico not me. I was too busy staring at my oppa in the crowd.

‘Oppa! He is here? He looks more awesome than ever!’ I squealed and shook Nana’s hand. ‘I have to go to him!’ I pushed off her leg. I started going out and I was half way out when Zico stopped me.

‘Who are you talking about?’ he asked and I pointed at my oppa in the crowd.

‘Kim Myungsoo, L! Now let go before I take my knife out!’ I started going out again but he held me on place. This was really embarrassing. I was sitting in Zico lap face to face with him with my legs on both his sides.

‘I don’t think so.’ Were his final wards before he pulled me down and kissed me. Surprisingly the kiss was soft and sweet. It actually made me shake even more. I didn’t answer it nor did I move away. I was shocked, taken aback, startled. This was my first kiss! He finally let go. I felt my face heat up and my eyes start to fill with teats. I don’t know why I reacted like that. I am usually not that sensitive but now I found myself running to the rooftop. Maybe it was the panic attack?

On the rooftop I went to the edge and looked at the city. The building wasn’t high but still I could see the streets bathed in streetlights. I shook my head to clear it. ‘I can’t adapt to this.’ I said in English.

‘He acts stupid and selfish sometimes but he is not bad.’ Kyung said closing the door behind him. ‘Hi, I came to apologies on Zico’s behalf.’

I shook my head. ’Do you understand that right now I want to push him off this edge?’

‘That is why he is not here now. That and because he is getting scold buy Nana.’ I gave out a laugh. After all she was the mother in Lycoris P. ‘Quilete’ I remained.

‘Seoul is so much different than New York.’ I said in English.

‘Were you in a gang there too?’ Kyung asked and came closed.

‘Same gang I am in here. We all moved. Here is harder to keep calm. Every other gang is practically playing with my sanity and I don’t have much left from it.’

‘What do you mean?’ Kyung was looking at me with rather worried expression. I shook my head and simply said. ‘I have issues. Let’s go downstairs I think Quilete should be finished with the scolding.’ We started going down and somewhere in the crowd I again spotted that girl. This time my head started spinning and I saw bloody spots in front my eyes. With my luck the panic attack may come tonight. I cursed under my breath and headed towards the table.

I was wrong about Nana. She hasn’t finished. Zico looked shocked. I wonder what did she tell him?… Did she?... ‘YAH QUILETE!’ She froze. I and Kyung were sitting in front the table and I didn’t really need to yell but still I had to make a point.

‘I didn’t say that much!’ she started defending herself. ‘Only that you have issues.’

‘No one is bringing up this night again.’ My voice dropped down to a low, monotone and dangerous one. ’Or else no one would be able to find your reminds.’ They nodded silently and I disappeared towards the bar. I came back with two bottles of rum. I didn’t bring glass because there already was. ‘One of you better prepare to carry me home.’ I started pouring myself glass after glass rum. This may seem shocking to some like Zico and Kyung but for me- Yona’s best drink buddy was something normal.

‘Don’t worry she has training she won’t fall under the table before she has started the second bottle.’ Nana explained.

‘You know what? Let’s go straight to Yona!’ I said and with one move slid under the table and out but soon found myself thrown over someone’s shoulder.

‘Since you are so determinate to get drunk I offer you to do it at home while you can still walk.’ Zico said while carrying me to the door.

‘I can’t walk properly while you are holding to me like a potato sac!’ I yelled. ‘Let me at least take my bottles!’ I was completely ignored. Oh how sweet! I slumped as melted cheese on his shoulder. I don’t know how much time passed but I found myself thrown down on the couch at home. Without question Nana sat down next to me and passed me the rum. I drank straight from the bottle not caring to give or ask for explanation. I must have gotten really drunk because when I passed out I didn’t dream at all.