"My heart that loved you
My eyes that looked at you
Are still here"

He close the door with a heavy heart.

It feels like he just went through hours of lecture when fifteen minutes barely have passed.

Lifting up his head, he stares blankly at the empty wall in front of him. He leans against the closed door, letting out a sigh.

He takes out his phone just to remind him of today's date. His lips automatically form a smile when he sees her face on screen.

She's holding a blue balloon, smiling cheerfully. It's the smile that he always wants to protect ever since 9 years ago.

"Two years, eh?" He whispers to no one. "Just... two years."

 

 

"In the cold wind the feeling of your warm hand stays for a while
All your traces become tears that stain on my cheeks"

 

It's already autumn. The cold wind is blowing but it does nothing to change the smile on her face when she sees him.

"Oh, hey!" she waves to him from afar. As he greets her with a smile, she quickly rushes to his side. "Oh, you don't bring your gloves today? It's pretty cold tonight!"

Forcing a smile, afraid that she'll notice what he's hiding, he pats her head softly, "It's okay. Don't worry. I'm strong, you know."

She takes one of his hand with hers, embracing it gently. Taking steps backwards carefully, her eyes lock with his, "Let's go!"

When she turns around, her back facing him as she leads him towards their destination, he's holding back everything.

Because by each step she takes, there's a little drop of tear he's holding back.

"I'll go on a trip for a short while to heal the wound in my heart
When I meet you after time passes
I will tell you that I missed you"

 

9 years.

It's been 10 years since they met for the first time and 9 years have passed ever since they're together. So many things have happened, bad and good, sad and happy memories.

Still, she's always there for him.

"If one day I'll go somewhere without you...," he asks with slight hesitation, unsure how the words will come out, "...will you wait?"

She raises her eyebrow with curiosity, chuckling, "What kind of question is that? Why do you even ask that of all things we can talk about?"

He fakes a laughter nervously, "Nothing. I'm just wondering. You know, maybe if I need to go overseas and stay there for a while. Things like that."

"Just for a while?"

There is a pause before his answer, "Yes, for a while."

She props her chin on palm, looking at him, "It's a silly question. Of course I will wait. You'll always come to meet me again too, right?"

His heart clenches, feeling guilty for not telling her everything yet relieved because his faith on her is unbreakable.

"I will."

 

"Today the sun sets and the moon rises again
Nothing changes
Oh, why does my heart keep changing this fast"

 

They don't catch a sleep that night.

They sit side by side, eyes admiring the still dark sky. Second by second, they're waiting for the Sun to come, cracking the dawn.

None of them says a word for a moment as if they're celebrating the silence.

"Are you going to tell me now?" she asks, still with her eyes on the view. "It's not like I just met you today, you know."

He looks at her and, somehow, he thinks that she already knew what he's going to tell her; she's just waiting for him to tell her directly, even if it's something that she doesn't want to hear about.

Sure he has been busy for years, going back and forth, from country to country, but she always understands. Never once she gave a complaint. If there's anything she ever gives to him, it's a reason.

A reason for him to always come back.

"Your image that resembles the blue sky is raining
When my body gets wet from this rain,
I’ll hide my flowing tears"

"I'm sorry."

"Why?"

"Because I need to leave."

They look at each other, letting the silence to take over the conversation. He can see tears are threatening to fall on her cheeks.

Raindrops fall on them when he is going to apologize again. She closes her eyes, taking a deep breath. It's uncertain whether she's trembling because of the cold rain or cold tears she's holding.

She doesn't want to cry because she knew it already. She knew and she has prepared herself. All of all, she doesn't want to cry because she hates to see he cries too.

But thoughts are always easier to think than done.

 

 

"Oh baby, say goodbye
oh, only for a short while, goodbye
I'll put aside the talk about goodbye for a short while"

 

Each of them is holding a cup of hot chocolate, warming not only their hands but also hearts.

They like spending times together even just for simple things.

A little dance for her, a short song for him, a laughter to share, a hug to embrace, a kiss for love. The hot chocolate always makes it on the list.

"Do I need to say goodbye?" she speaks calmly, sipping her drink. She still hesitates to look at him in the eyes. "Should I?"

He doesn't answer right away but he replies with another question, "Let's put aside that word for now."

Silence.

"It's just for a while, right?"

Silence again.

"Yes."

"When I open that door and take one step
The tip of my nose will feel your breath"

He opens the door for himself, taking a step forward. He turns around to see her before pulling her close for a hug.

There's nothing different from the usual hugs he gave for her on her birthday, their anniversaries, or any other special occassions. It's just a little bit longer than before.

"Don't cry," he her hair, kissing the long hair lovingly. "You know I'll cry if you cry."

"You know I'll cry harder if you cry because I cry," she retorts, causing him to crack a small laughter. She does want to hear his laughter though.

She pulls away slightly, looking up at his face. She gives him a smile, "There's a 'good' in 'goodbye' so we shouldn't be sad."

He blinks.

"Yes, you're right."

"In the past, I did whatever I wanted and was foolish
You who embraced all that are very precious"

 

12 July 2017.

He marks the date on his calendar, taking a very long time to look at the number as if it might change. He spins the pen in his hand, scanning the other notes he made on previous dates.

There are days when he endured hardships, when he cried because he felt so helpless, when he thought it might be the end, when he forced himself to smile.

Yet he's still here now.

Because of all people whom he loves.

"Oh baby, say goodbye
oh, only for a short while goodbye
I’ll go back to the place where I once was"

 

12 July 2017.

She marks the date on her calendar, taking a very long time to look at the number as if it might change. She spins the pen in her hand, scanning the other notes she made on previous dates.

There are days when she missed him like crazy, when she cried because she held back her tears for too long, when she thought she might not be able to go on, when she wished for time to return.

Yet she's still here now.

Because she knows, in the future, he'll be there for her. The past is the past and all she can wait for is the future.

Because she knows he'll always come back.

 

 

"When I open that door and take one step
So that I can stand in front of you who I missed"

The bell jingles, a sign that a new customer just steps in the shop.

She is busy cleaning the table but stops immediately when she hears his voice, "Can I ask for a cup of hot chocolate, please?"

Their eyes meet and the smiles stay.

He takes a step closer to her, standing right in front of her.

Still with the eyes that look at her with love, still with the heart that keeps her forever with love -- he has returned from the short journey.

To continue their journey together.

"I'm home."

"My heart that love you
My eyes that looked at you
I’ll wait"

 

* * * * *

 

 

 

This story is based on "A Short Journey" by Super Junior.

13 October 2015. Eunhyuk enlists as active duty soldier.

This is written as an ELF as Eunhyuk is the first K-Pop idol who pulled me to K-Pop. He will and always be my bias.

Let's see each other again in 2 years. #WaitingForEunhyuk