Does anybody really care about what happens to me? Should I just go kill myself? I don't want to be in this world with these kinds of beings. There's no point anyways. If getting bullied and pushed around counts, well I'm not living for that. I hope I can just find a way out of this..."  Yesung's words stung Ryeowook's heart. Yesung really felt worthless. Ryeowook was determined to make him feel loved. To feel wanted. He continued reading on, skipping a lot until the last page.that Yesung has written:

"Do you know what it feels like to be alone? Moving from place to place, not able to make friends because you never stay long enough to get to know them.. Feeling out of place.. Every school... Every neighborhood... Well it feels depressing. Knowing that anybody interested in being your friend and then you're leaving without having a chance- it's heartbreaking. I want it to stop, so I can have one friend. That is all I want. One friend to talk to, vent to, hug, laugh with... and everything, instead of my brother bothering me all the time.

My brother walks in and tells me his feelings and his thoughts. It's nice, but I get jealous, too. He made friends before, when he was in pre-school and those younger years, I didn't. But I can't get mad at him for that. I should be happy for him. I am.. I just wish that sometime I could be happy for myself. I never told anyone this but-"

Ryeowook closed the journal and let out a big, long sigh. What was Yesung going to write? It slightly drove him crazy. He couldn't believe Yesung had such depressing feelings. How was he going to help Yesung? He wasn't sure yet. He'd figure it out. Ryeowook needed to break open Yesung's tough shell and get him to open up. He was determined to.

~

Yesung

Yesung opened the door to his house and quietly walked in, trying not to get his parents to bother him. He really did not want to explain this to them. If he did... he wasn't sure what would happen. They'd probably move again... because of him, and Yesung doesn't want to leave Ryeowook. He is the only friend that he has ever had. He quickly speed walked to his room but stopped so suddenly after hearing his mother call out his name, "Yesung~! Come here for a moment," she spoke. Yesung let out a long sigh and turned around to walk to the living room. This is what he was trying to avoid. He peeked around the wall and saw her and his father standing in front of the couch, "Honey, please have a seat."

Yesung hesitated and weakly walked to the couch and sat down. He was slightly terrified on what was going to happen during these minutes. What are they going to say? It's not about moving is it? His thoughts flowed with panicky thoughts yet his facial expressions stayed calm. He showed no emotion whatsoever except a questioning look. He hoped it was nothing serious. How could he live if he moved again?

"Sweetie, what's wrong? You've seemed so depressed lately. We want to help you," Yesung's mother sat next to him and laid her hand on his shoulder. Yesung shrugged. How could he tell his parents? It was hard to even tell his brother, or even write it down in his journal. He couldn't say anything. He wouldn't. His mother furrowed her eyebrows but her expression changed and she hugged him, tears falling down her eyes, "Yesungie~ I'm worried about you. Are you sure you're okay? I want you safe," she brought him into a tighter embrace. His father sat next to him, having a worried expression on his face but said nothing. Yesung sat there, unable to speak. He had to find a way to get out of this. All he wanted to do was go to his room and not talk to his parents, even if they were trying to help him.

Yesung cleared his throat, "Mom..." he heard her start to cry. She was a very emotional woman, "Mom... I'm fine. There's nothing wrong." he held her tightly, lying through his teeth. He felt pain as she hugged him tighter. The bruises from the kicks still hurt like hell and the situation he was in right now did not help him at all. He pushed her mother away, only a little bit, so that he could at least breath and not feel the pain of his wounds. "Really mom. I'm fine," he held onto her shoulders and looked her in the eyes. He broke the eye contact with her stood up. If he looked into her eyes any longer, he would have started to cry as well. He walked to his room, unable to deal with the tensity in the room that hung in the air. 

He walked into his bedroom, shutting the door, and laid on his bed. He curled up into a ball and began to cry. He cried all of his emotions out, but silently. He didn't want anyone to hear him. He couldn't handle it! Getting beat up all the time. Why? Because he didn't have much money? Because he wore used clothes? He's the "new" kid that everyone wants to pick on. But why every single school? It didn't make sense. He was irritated. Was that his purpose in life? Ryeowook. What about Ryeowook? What did Ryeowook have that Yesung didn't, amking him not the kid that everyone wanted to pick on? Or was it just "destiny" that Yesung was suppose to be the loser? He didn't know.

~

Ryeowook

Ryeowook woke up earlier than usual. He quickly got himself dressed and ready to start the new day. He was excited to see Yesung again.To talk to him again, greet him, tell him about his life, etc. Ryeowook, no matter what, seemed to always talk. That's what he did. It made him break loose and feel comfortable. He quickly but his journal in his bag, put on his book bag and headed off to the bus stop, humming to himself. He smiled, looking at the beautiful horizon. He loved the beauty of nature. 

Ryeowook arrived at school, walking happily to his locker. He couldn't wait to see Yesung again. He stood in front of his locker and opened it, gathering books he needed and homework assignments that were already done ahead of time. He like being a week ahead on school work. That way he didn't have to worry about it. He was all into his own thoughts, forgetting about the surroundings around him. 
 

"Hey! What's this?" a loud, obnoxious Kingka spoke up. He was standing behind Ryeowook. Ryeowook's thoughts have been interrupted by the Kingka and he turned around, looking at the Kingka, "Property of Yesung? Who's Yesung?" He looked around and spotted Ryeowook staring wide-eyed at him, "Is this yours?" he  grinned evilly. 

Ryeowook spoke up, "No, But that is a friend of mine. Can I have it back?" he held out his hand. The Kingka smirked and flipped through the pages and laughed. Ryeowook tried snatching it back, "Give it back! You shouldn't read it! It's not even yours!" Ryeowook's own words stung himself in the heart. He knew it was wrong of him for keeping it in the first place. 

"It's a journal! Ha! What a loser. This friend of yours is totally a bunch of crap." The Kingka read a page and started to laugh, "Hey guys! Check this out. This Yesung kid is this depressed loser. He wants to kill himself? What an attention hog. He means nothing," he commented. He read a page aloud to his Kingka friends and laughed together. Ryeowook tried pushing away the Kingkas but it was no use. They were tougher and way stronger than he was.

~

Yesung walked by. He wondered what all of the laughter was about. But then again, what did it matter? It's not like it was going to affect him in his everyday life. "Hey, you!" the same Kingka holding the journal called out to Yesung, "Are you Yesung?" he looked at him with amusement in his eyes.

Yesung hesitated for a moment and slowly nodded, keeping a careful eye on the Kingka. He knew that Kingka way too well. He was the daily punch-in-the-arm kind of bully to him. Truly obnoxious. The Kingka walked over to Yesung, "So I'm guessing this is yours then," he chuckled, "You really want attention don't you?" he then punched his arm. 

Yesung's eyes widened and he smiled. He didn't care that he was punched or not during that moment. He was glad to have it back. But the comment popped his bubble, "W-What? Where'd you find this?" He looked at the Kingka, looking thankful.

The Kingka smirked, "That kid's bag. It fell out," he pointed at Ryeowook. He got bored quickly and punched Yesung's arm again, "Loser," he scoffed and walked away with his friends, laughing about the journal. Yesung looked over at Ryeowook and furrowed his eyebrows. Was it true? Was Ryeowook lying the whole time?

Yesung walked up to Ryeowook and stood there. He stared at Ryeowook for a moment which seemed like hours to Ryeowook. He froze, unable to make and movement whatsoever, "Is it true?" he continued staring at Ryeowook.

Ryeowook stuttered and nodded, "Y-Yes it's true..." he said as quiet as possible.

Yesung's expression hardened and he started to get angry, "How long have you had it?"

"Two days..." he answered.

"Did you read it?" Yesung continued to get more upset.

Ryeowook nodded, "Yes..."

Yesung scoffed and shook his head. He looked away, "And to think you were my first real friend..." he glared at Ryeowook and began to walk away.

Ryeowook tried stopping him, grabbing him by the shoulder, "Yesung! Yah... I was going to give it back! I'm sorry that-"

"I don't want to hear it! I should have never trusted you! Don't ever speak to me again!" Yesung shouted at him in the face. He threw Ryeowook's hand off of his shoulder and continued walking away. He should have known. Ryeowook always seemed weird to begin with anyways. Was that Ryeowook's goal? To humiliate him and get embarrassed and bullied by more students? Yesung might as well believe it. Because that is exactly what Ryeowook did, accident or not.

Ryeowook stood there. Tears streaming down his cheeks. It was my fault anyways! It's all my fault. I should have never read it. i shouldn't have invaded his privacy. What do I do?  Ryeowook turned back to his locker and shut it, walking to his next class. He was going to have to find out how to regain Yesung's trust back. He couldn't give up. Even if he screwed up big time.

Yesung didn't even go to class. He ditched class time and went up to the roof. He sat on one of the bench swings and stared at the bright sky, tears also falling down his face. He couldn't trust anybody. Ryeowook invaded his life. He read his journal. Yesung felt so violated. Embarrassed. He started becoming angrier and angrier. He really wanted to jump off the roof at that moment. Just to end it all, finally. It would be better than going back to class and facing everyone. He knew that everyone would make fun of him with his journal and the things he wrote in it. 

Yesung stood up from the bench swing and walked up to the edge of the roof. He stared down at the ground far below him. He bit his lip in anxiety. All he needed to do was jump.

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