Chapter 16
“How is she? Is she doing okay?”

Sun Young, gripping the phone tightly, let out a breath as she sneaked a glance towards her cousin, who was by the big bay window of the hotel room they were staying at. She was seated, her knees to her chest, watching the people down the street walking back and forth. It was pretty much what she did the whole time ever since they arrived in Thailand.

“I guess it would depend on your definition of okay,” Sun Young responded quietly, tearing her eyes away from the heartbreaking sight.

Jin Ri had become pretty much like a zombie. She walked, talked and ate. But she was just pretty much just there. She was just existing and doing nothing else. Even when Sun Young suggested that they go shopping or try out the local Thai food that she loved so much, she didn’t even bat an eyelash. She mostly preferred to stay in the hotel, in the room or down at the lounge, where a jazz band played some rather melancholy songs during evenings.

A sigh went through the line. “I’m sorry, Sun Young. I know that my apologies aren’t going to do much, but I’m doing it because I really am sorry.”

“I know you didn’t want this,” Sun Young finally replied. “No one wanted this. But it’s happened. But if Kyuhyun’s apologies aren’t going to fix this, then yours aren’t going to either so stop apologizing, Hyukjae oppa.”

“If it makes you feel any better, Kyu’s not doing so well either,” Eunhyuk offered.

“It doesn’t,” Sun Young stoutly retorted. “If anything, he should feel like his world is ending. What’s done is done and he can’t take anything that he’s done back.”

“I think I shouldn’t be the one hearing this,” Eunhyuk butted in, chuckling a bit.

Sun Young ignored him. “He’s not going to be able to take back the hurt that he’s upon Ri and he’s not going to—.”

“Sun Young,” Jin Ri called, rather sharply.

Sun Young stopped her rant and faltered as Jin Ri stood up and made her way towards her. No matter how hurt or angry Jin Ri was with Kyuhyun, she never spoke any hurtful words about him and wouldn’t stand for anyone else who would do the same.

Sun Young excused herself from the room as Jin Ri pressed the phone to her ear. No matter how much she hurt her cousin by the words that she had said, she wasn’t going to apologize because she knew that what Kyuhyun did to her, how Kyuhyun hurt her, was something worse and was something that was worth criticizing.

“Oppa,” Jin Ri calmly and somewhat apologetically greeted him. “I’m sorry for the things Sun Young said. She’s probably more angry at Kyuhyun than I am.” She paused, waiting for Eunhyuk to say something, but he didn’t speak. She sighed and sat down on the edge of the bed. “But everything she said was right. I’m not okay. I don’t know when I’ll ever be okay.”

She let out a breath and closed her eyes, gripping the comforter. Images of Kyuhyun and Hyo Sun kissing kept on popping in her head every time she tried to relax. And every single time, she forced herself to remember moments that she had with Kyuhyun where she felt his love for her.

Eunhyuk cleared his throat, bringing her back to reality. She opened her eyes and bit her lip as she stared at her reflection on the mirror across the bed.

“But he’s doing well, right, oppa?” she continued, unable to stop thinking about her husband and how he was doing. Despite everything, she missed him terribly and worried about him. “He’s eating properly?” She chuckled a bit as she heard herself. “I’m sure he’s fine. You’re all taking good care of him.”

“No one takes care of me the way you do,” he responded, “princess.”

She froze, tightly gripping the phone. She glanced at the bedroom door, wondering if her cousin had tricked her into this. As she thought of how best to respond, she decided upon not responding at all.

“Please don’t hang up,” Kyuhyun entreated as if reading her mind. “You don’t have to talk. I just… I want to—just please, princess, don’t hang up.”

She held on and listened as he started talking, mostly about things that they were doing for promotions, anything but their problem just so she wouldn’t hang up. The Super Junior M members were already in China, along with Eunhyuk and Sungmin, who were newly inducted into the group.

“Hyukjae hyung’s and Sungmin hyung’s Chinese is so bad that it’s become embarrassing for us doing shows with them,” Kyuhyun shared, forcing out a chuckle to lighten up the mood. “It’s like starting all over again…”

He trailed away in silence, realizing that the same thing could be said about him and Jin Ri. He sighed and gave up on skirting around the issue. The truth was it was hard for him to be in China because it was hard for him to be around the members. Their disappointment with him radiated every time he was with them and it made him wish to be able to just crawl into a hole and never come out. He wanted nothing more than to fix things with his wife and he was going to do everything to make that happen.

“I’ll wait,” he said with a quiet resolve. “I’ll wait for you for as long as it takes you to forgive me and love me again.”

“I never said that I didn’t love you anymore,” she interrupted. She wanted that to be clear to him because it was crystal clear to her. Despite everything, she still loved him. That was what made the whole thing so painful to accept. She loved him with all her heart and she still loved him even if he broke it into pieces. Loving with a broken heart was never the easiest thing to do.

“I’m so afraid that you’ll leave me, princess,” he admitted, choking a bit. “I broke us, our love, and that gives you every right to leave me. But please don’t leave me even if the love isn’t the same anymore. I can’t—I can’t…” His voice got caught in his throat.

She closed her eyes and forced herself not to cry. Hearing Kyuhyun so shattered made her heart ache even more. As much as she was hurt and angry with him for what he did, she never wanted to see him that way. And she was sure that none of his hyungs enjoyed seeing their magnae, their sunshine, so broken.

“Love isn’t the only reason why we stay with or leave people,” she quoted what she told him in the past, in a time when they were only just friends. “And even if it is...” She stopped, unable to continue.

“Will you… will you be there at the airport when we come back?” he asked hopefully after a couple of seconds of silence.

“I’ll let you know,” was her vague reply. “I have to go,” she immediately followed, glancing up at the door that just opened with Sun Young walking back in.

“I love you, princess,” he told her, almost in a whisper before she could end the call. “I will wait for you. I’ve waited for you all my life and I’m not going to stop now. I’ll never stop.”

“Ri, are you alright?” Sun Young asked as her cousin ended the call.

Jin Ri looked up at her cousin, shaking her head, and started to cry.

~ * ~

Kyuhyun stared at the phone long after the call ended. It’s only been a couple of days and yet he felt like he hadn’t seen her for far longer than that. He supposed this was part of his punishment. Aside from having the fear of losing her in his heart, he also has to realize what it felt like living without her by his side.

He had already put the cordless phone down on the table and had sat down on the sofa across from it when it rang again. Without so much as a glance at the caller ID, he picked it up and pressed on the answer button. But before he could get a word out, someone had snatched the phone from him.

He looked up, surprised more than anything else, when he saw that it was Sungmin who now had the phone in his hands.

“Hello,” Sungmin greeted whoever was calling. He glanced at Kyuhyun then turned his attention to Eunhyuk, who was warily eyeing him. “Sorry, but he’s not here right now…He’s actually busy—I understand, but he’s really busy so I suggest you stop calling…I’ll let him know…Yes, I will let him know. Bye.” He immediately ended the call and handed the phone to Eunhyuk, while exchanging a meaningful glance.

“Who was that?” Kyuhyun asked softly as to not attract the other members’ attention to himself. He didn’t want them to look at him, even just accidentally, and remember what it was that he had done.

Siwon was the one who answered. “It’s Hyo Sun,” he said, taking a seat beside Donghae on the sofa across from where Kyuhyun was. “She’s been calling and calling.”

“And calling and calling and calling,” Eunhyuk emphasized, half-heartedly glaring at him. No matter how much he wanted to get mad at the magnae, it was hard for him to do. He knew Kyuhyun and it was obvious that it wasn’t something that he wanted to happen. He—everyone—could see how much he loved Jin Ri.

“I… why didn’t you guys tell me?” Kyuhyun muttered, turning his gaze to the floor.

“What for, so you could go and talk to her?” Zhoumi, who had been in the room, just listening in but wasn’t saying anything, snapped. He stood up from his seat by the window and walked over to the space beside the couch Kyuhyun was on.

Henry and Ryeowook worriedly looked from Zhoumi to Kyuhyun and back again. Ever since they arrived in China, and even back when they were still in Korea, it was like they were walking in glass around Zhoumi. He was really angry with Kyuhyun and what he did. The two barely talked, not even during broadcast shows.

“No, that’s not what I meant—,” Kyuhyun started to say, glancing up in panic at Zhoumi’s intonation.

“That better be not what you meant,” Zhoumi interrupted, rather harshly. “But we really can’t trust you anymore, can we? Not after what you did.”

“It was an accident!” Kyuhyun retorted, standing up and clenching his fists. “How many times do I have to apologize for that?”

“Apologies aren’t going to be enough, Kyuhyun,” Zhoumi shot back, fists equally clenched. “They’re never going to be enough. You got married to Ri and promised her so many things and you broke each one of them with that stupid act with that girl.”

“I know what I did!” Kyuhyun practically bellowed, shaking in hurt and anger. “I know I was stupid! Don’t you think I regret every single day what I did? Do you think I enjoy seeing Jin Ri hurt like this? Do you think I relish the fact that it’s me who’s making her cry like this?”

Donghae got up from his seat and pulled Kyuhyun back, wrapping an arm around his waist. Eunhyuk did the same to Zhoumi.

“That’s enough,” Donghae calmly directed to both of them.

“You’re supposed to be my best friend, Mi,” Kyuhyun earnestly declared, the anger dissolving on his face and being replaced by hurt and an appeal to be understood. “You’re my best man. I thought you would be helping me with this.”

“You picked me as your best man because I am one of Jin Ri’s best friends,” Zhoumi reminded him. “And in this case, I think she needs my help more than you do.” He pushed Eunhyuk off of him and left the room.

Kyuhyun moved away from Donghae, who was still holding on to him. The other members watched as the magnae walked to the window, his head hung and shoulders shaking. Zhoumi was Kyuhyun’s best friend, but he was Jin Ri’s best friend too. They wished they could make Kyuhyun understand that Zhoumi was angry because he was hurt for the both of them. He was hurt because of what was happening with his best friends.

The rest of the boys quietly left the room one by one, all not really knowing what to do, all not knowing how to comfort someone whom they were also angry with somehow.

Kyuhyun sat down on the nearest chair and buried his face in his hands, sobbing more freely now that he was alone. He couldn’t explain the pain that he felt in his heart. With what he had done, he had not pushed his wife away, he had also pushed his friends and family away. The members weren’t really speaking to him. His best friend seemed to be shunning him. His parents and sister had clearly told them how disappointed they were of what he had done.

He was alone.

And it was all his fault.

Taking a deep breath, he lifted his head up and wiped his tears away. He stood up and was about to walk towards the door when he stopped in his tracks.

Ryeowook was seated on one of the sofas, playing with his hands.

“Wook, what are you doing here?” Kyuhyun asked, not knowing what else to say in his shock at seeing him there.

“I just… I didn’t want to leave you by yourself,” Ryeowook explained, looking up at him. “The others just went out to get something to eat. I thought maybe you’d like some company?” He looked at the magnae with appealing eyes, hoping that he would know that he wasn’t alone, that he still had someone.

Kyuhyun sat down beside Ryeowook without another word. Ryeowook then lifted his arm as Kyuhyun snuggled to him, burying his face on his shoulder.

And Ryeowook didn’t say anything for a while, even when he felt his shirt getting wet with Kyuhyun’s quiet tears.

~ * ~

Jessica stormed into the office before Tiffany could do anything to stop her. She had been following the second eldest member of the group around the company building, trying to calm her down and hoping that she wouldn’t do anything rash—like what she was currently doing.

“Sica,” Tiffany worriedly reminded her, glancing around at the curious faces of the employees. “Please don’t do this.” She tried her best to smile happily at the people who were greeting them.

But Jessica merely ignored her. She scanned the room and immediately set on her way once she found who she was looking for.

“We need to talk,” Jessica demanded in a scary low voice that Tiffany had never heard her use before.

Keiji looked up from the photos he was sorting, giving them an innocent look. “Can I help you?” he asked, annoying Jessica further. “I’m busy here.”

“Can’t you just spare us a bit of your time?” Tiffany cut in before Jessica could retort back with a yell that she knew was building up in her. “There’s just something we wanted to ask you.”

Jessica practically dragged Keiji out of the office and into the hallway. Once outside, Keiji pushed Jessica’s hand away and glared at her.

“What do you want?” he questioned, glaring at Tiffany, too.

“We just—,” Tiffany started.

“What do you think are you doing?” Jessica demanded, giving him one of her icy stares. “Is this what you’ve been planning right from the start? Is this how you wanted things to happen?” She watched as Keiji gave her a smirk. “Don’t you dare deny it.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he responded, crossing his arms on his chest. He looked at Tiffany. “What is your friend on about?”

“Keiji-ssi, don’t make Sica look stupid,” Tiffany stated, frowning at him. “We all know what you’ve been trying to do between Jin Ri and Kyuhyun oppa.”

“Well do you know about your little friend here? About how she was with me in Japan and how she—,” Keiji decided to sidetrack the conversation.

“Yes, we do,” Tiffany interrupted him, glancing at Jessica, who had stilled. “We all know.” She gave him a pointed look just to drive her message home. “Stop trying to blackmail her because it’s not going to work. She has nothing to hide and we’re not afraid of you. But we wish you would stop trying to break Kyuhyun oppa and Jin Ri up. They’re married. No one should come between them, especially not you.”

“I’m not the one who’s breaking them up,” Keiji reminded them, clenching his fist. “If it were up to me, I would kill Kyuhyun for the way he’s hurt her.”

“A likely alibi,” Jessica shot back. “This is the way you’ve planned things, haven’t you? Befriend Hyo Sun, get her to seduce him so they would break up and so you could have Jin Ri all for yourself. Well, guess what, she still isn’t with you. And she never will be.”

Keiji glared at her, both hands now in a fist. Tiffany grabbed Jessica’s arm to make her step back.

“Well Kyuhyun can’t have her either,” he announced, a smile on his face the scared both of the girls. “Not like this, anyway.” No one said anything for a moment. But before any of the girls could speak up, he went on, “You girls better stay out of this. You should know by now that nothing you do is going to help them.”

“You’re a bastard,” Jessica stated in frustration as he turned his back on them to go back to his cubicle.

“That may be so,” Keiji said, stopping to face them once more. “But I’m not the one to blame here. Kyuhyun is.” With another smirk, he left them stunned.


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Notes:
1. If you see any mistakes, please let me know. Especially on the last part.
2. I am sorry for this chapter. Things really aren't going to get any better so please don't kill me.
3. I hope you'll let me know what you think.
4. /runs away