She hasn’t contacted me since then. I thought miserably, staring at my phone. We had our final good-bye stage at Inkigayo the day before. Tonight we were having a dinner party with 2AM since it had been awhile since we had seen our One Day brothers. Eunhee was supposed to come as well, but she hadn’t texted me.

            I was lying on my bed, staring at the upper bunk. My head was swimming with so many thoughts. This girl, Lim Eunhee, when had she entered into my heart? She had no outward charms, but I couldn’t help but be charmed by her. My dreams were full of her face in its different emotions: happiness, annoyance, amusement, sadness, et cetera. Her sad faces haunted me and I wanted nothing more than to see her smile the rest of her days. When had everything become like this?

            I would be lying if I said when I first met her I wasn’t intrigued. She was probably the only Korean girl in the entire nation who was unable to recognize at least one of us. Perhaps that was cocky of me to say, but it was the truth. She had appraised us indifferently and minced no words at our expense. We all were a little in awe of her.

            Then it turns out she’s Producer Lim’s daughter and the ex-girlfriend of G.O. of Mblaq. Producer Lim had worked on Mnet Hot Blood when we were trainees, so why hadn’t we met her then? She obviously visited the sets sometimes, but I guess at the time she was busy with G.O.

            Also at the time, G.O. was Byunghee, member of TYKEYS. According to Eunhee, this was when things turned rocky. Though their fame was not great, many girls were falling for Byunghee’s vocals and his manly looks. Eunhee, only 17 or 18, was naturally perturbed at the amount of new numbers in his phone, et cetera. But she expected the best from him.

            Eventually TYKEYS broke up and Byunghee entered into training in J.Tune Entertainment. Somewhere between the break-up and his change to a trainee, they broke up. Eunhee said he didn’t feel appreciated or something though she sometimes thinks he did it because he wanted to be single for this new life, this new start. No baggage from the past to hinder him.

            Eunhee herself, heartbroken naturally, left Korea for the US. While she was there, Byunghee became G.O. and Mblaq debuted. And then, she returned home.

            Being an idol was like belonging to a huge, extended family. Even if we were in different entertainment companies, we were all inter-connected. Many idols switch companies or have had prior groups, which provides for the inter-mixing of entertainment companies. To be honest, none of us really hate our competition. It’s our fans who love us so much that they hate any group that would try to oust us from our top spot. Most of us are all friends; of course, there are some who dislike each other. There’s always gossip that’s only amongst idols about dating and crushes.

            Yes, we have those too. And many times people secretly date. Nothing’s really secret anymore, which is why I wasn’t surprised when Eunhee told me that a girl idol had confessed to her about going on a date with G.O. when he was dating her. The girl was only a trainee at the time, but now she was in a girl group and had run into Eunhee at a music show before she left for America. After that, a few other girls confessed to her. Eunhee was livid. Yet, she somehow managed to blame it on herself.

            I sighed heavily, these thoughts twirling in my mind. She was really odd as Junho had said. However, once she put her mind to something, she easily accomplished it.

            “~Nothing better…than you…”

            I picked up my phone and stared. She had texted me.

            E: Hello, Khun! Uhm…how about meeting me downstairs when I arrive…which is now! Kekeke.

            She’s here already? I hopped out of my bed, hitting my head on the top bunk. Rubbing my head, I sprinted from my room and into the living room. I hastily stopped to slip on my slippers, ignoring Wooyoung’s question on where I was going.

            Why had I texted him like that? I was really becoming a girl like that, wasn’t I? One of those girls who played with a guy’s feelings and called him oppa, the kind I hated most. Except, I wasn’t playing with him, was I? And for some reason, calling him oppa came easily. Well, more easily than it had with G.O.

            Whoa, did I just call him that? The Byunghee I knew was not present in this G.O. Oh yes, his zaniness and poker face was still there. Somehow, I think he grew up though. Yeah, he was older than me. But it seemed as if he had finally matured and grown out of this playboy mentality. One never knew though and honestly it didn’t change anything at all with him.

            “Eunhee-ah! Come inside. It’s raining!” I looked up at the sky. It was raining. When did this happen? My hands went to my head, which was already covered by a hood. When did I put that up?

            Nichkhun held the door open for me as we entered into their building.

            “I hadn’t even realized it was raining,” I said, brushing the rain drops from my jacket.

            “You’re so silly sometimes, Eunhee. Ready to head up? Do you need me to carry anything?” He was eyeing the purse and two bags I was carrying. One was from my excursion to the bakery as a little gift for the boys and the other was from the bookstore. Wordlessly I handed them over and he smiled.  “How have you been lately?”

            “I’ve been okay…just sort of relaxing. Have you been very busy?”

            “A bit. We’ve finished up our album promotions the other day. So now we’re just resting.”

            “Ahhh, really? How was that? I didn’t get a chance to watch…” which was a total lie. I had the television on the station an hour before Inkigayo was supposed to start. My appa was cooking and seemed surprised that I was watching a music show at home. I ignored his curious stares and avoided answering his questions. He chuckled when I halted my pacing and sat to watch 2PM’s last performance. It was amazing and practically perfect like most of their performances were. There was even an interview with them before they went on. Nichkhun had winked at the camera and Sulli had asked if it was for his girlfriend. That news had spread like wildfire days before and it was still a hot topic though JYP had tried his best to quiet it.

            Nichkhun had smiled cutely and made a heart with his hands. He faced the camera and said, “Chagiya, are you thinking about me? I think about you. I miss you. Saranghaeyo.”

            I felt my heart stop and the fan girls went wild. My dad dropped the spoon he was holding behind me. It clanged as it fell into the sink.

            “Omona, Nichkhun has a girlfriend?” It was obvious to me that my appa didn’t pay attention to any idol news even though he was constantly around them.

            “A-Apparently so…” I answered smoothly. My hand was pressed against my beating heart. Surely that wasn’t directed at me, was it? It was obviously just for the fans, right? I let out a deep breath and noticed my dad had left the kitchen. He was wearing an apron and had a kerchief on his head to keep his hair out of the food. He was holding a pair of chopsticks in one hand while the other was on his hip. He reached out with his chopstick hand and waggled them at me.

            “Ya!You hang out with them all the time. Do you know who it is?”

            “EHHH? Appa, why do you care?”

            “It’s not you, is it?”

            “Why would you even ask such a question?”

            It was obvious he didn’t believe my nonchalant attitude. He crossed his arms across his chest and eyed me severely.

            “Now, I’m not your umma, so you probably don’t want dating advice from me. But, Nichkhun is a good guy. He isn’t called the Thai Prince for no reason. Not to mention his group is loads more popular that G.O.’s. And I doubt he’d cheat on you. Plus, he’s taller.”

            “Appa~~~,” I cried out, trying not to laugh. My dad was really something else at times. “Why are you like this?” I asked. He shrugged his shoulders.

            “Just a thought. But, if you need me to, I will cut his parts from programs.”

            “Thank…you?”

            “Not a problem.” And he returned to the kitchen. I was shaking my head and then finished watching Inkigayo.

            “Oh, you didn’t?” Nichkhun asked me, his tone disappointed. Yet, I’m sure he was slightly relieved.  

            “Actually…I did…” I heard a sharp intake of breath and he quickly apologized.

            “I’m sorry about that. I’m not sure what I was thinking….”

            “It’s okay, Khun-oppa. I actually…uhm, wanted to tell you that…well, I like you. And I’d like to be your real girlfriend.” I paused; surprised I had actually said all that aloud. I cleared my throat and continued. We were entering the elevator and I continued, “I know it’s probably too late, but I wanted to tell you. I freaked out the other day because everyone was there and I’m really bad about expressing myself in words to begin with so, I—“ I’ll never be sure how it happened, but Khun managed to pin me against the wall in the elevator without dropping my bags. His free hand found my neck while his lips found my own. My mind was absolutely blank. I hadn’t been kissed in awhile and the sensation was familiar, yet different from my last. I actually felt something true for Khun. As for the others…well, they were a thing of the past.

            “It’s never too late,” he whispered after he broke the kiss. I must have looked very dazed and confused because he chuckled placed a light kiss on my nose. “C’mon, tee ruk.” The elevator doors opened and I felt him guide me out, his hand having found my own easily.

            Tee ruk? What does that mean? He seemed to like using Thai words around me since I couldn’t understand them.

            We walked down the hallway to their door. Khun lifted his hand to open the door. It opened from the inside and we were face-to-face with Minjae, their manager. He pointed at Khun and me, his mouth slightly agape.

            “You came,” he said, obviously surprised. He opened the door wider for us to come inside. Nichkhun released my hand and motioned for me to go in first. I walked inside and slipped out of my shoes, all the while Minjae was staring openly at me.  I had never met him before though I had seen him a few times at music shows. He seemed a little off-kilter to me.

            “Anyong haseyo, Lim Eunhee imnida,” I greeted, bowing in the foyer. Minjae continued to stare at me.

            “This is her?” He genuinely looked surprised and I hadn’t the slightest clue why. “Ahh, nice to meet you. I’m Minjae.”

            “I know. Everyone knows who you are, Minjae.” That was probably the first nice thing I had ever said to anyone once I first met them. It was not outright nice, but it wasn’t mean either.

            “You don’t look like a nuna,” he said, still staring.

            “I’m not.”

            “She’s not.”

            “But I thought Khun only dated nunas.”

            I looked at Nichkhun who smiled sheepishly. “I’ve dated a few older women,” he said.

            “Ohhh,” was my reply.

            “Ya, Minjae-hyung, you’re like our creepy uncle. Don’t attack the girl before she’s come inside,” Taecyeon announced, coming over to the door. He delivered a greasy smile and said, “Hey Eunhee, lookin’ good.”

            “Ew,” I said back to him.  There was a pair of guest slippers for me, so I slipped into them and stepped fully into the apartment.