By the time Sehun got home, the sun was setting, the sky darkening to match his mood.

It was still bright out, midday, when he’d left Jongin but after their little “talk”, he’d wandered around the city for a while, stopping for lunch when his stomach demanded sustenance though he didn’t taste a thing. Afterwards, he’d driven to the park that he often went to when he needed to clear his head, letting his mind drift aimlessly, before finally making his way home.

He’d always considered himself an assertive person but being overly aggressive didn’t come naturally to him. Sure, if he wanted something he could go after it with a single-minded determination incomparable to others but that rarely ever resulted in hurting someone, especially someone he cared about. However, in order to be an even match with Jongin for their battle of wit and wills, he’d tapped into a side of him that he hadn’t known he’d had, that he still didn’t think he had otherwise he wouldn’t have been left feeling as drained and dispirited as he currently was.

He didn’t know how Jongin did it. Being confident was one thing, and Sehun had that in droves, but this overabundance of cockiness, of pure arrogance that Jongin seemingly possessed, the utter belief in one’s own superiority, was exhausting. He couldn’t imagine living like that, having to strut about like a prime day in and day out.

Sighing, he unlocked his front door and let himself in, closing it softly behind him.

“There you are. I was beginning to think you’d forgotten your way home.”

Turning around, Sehun saw his sister sitting on the stairs.

“Where’ve you…” Emily broke off, frowning when, despite the growing darkness in the house, she finally noticed her brother’s expression. “Sehun-ah? What’s wrong?”

Sehun started to open his mouth, automatically formulating the usual “Nothing, I’m fine” but the words wouldn’t come out. It wasn’t nothing and he wasn’t fine.

Instead he shook his head, shrugging helplessly.

“Oh, Sehun-ah…”

She opened her arms to him and though he dragged his feet at first, eventually he hastened and collapsed across her lap, burying his face in her belly.

It was a little awkward finding comfort in the position since he was so much bigger than she, broad shoulders and all, but they shifted around until they did, settling against one another, her arm around his back, cradling him; her fingers running through his hair; her lips peppering kisses along his hairline.

When he was little and something upset him, which was rare since Sehun had always had an affable personality and never hid what he thought or how he felt, he would brood and storm about, not lashing out at anyone but not saying what was wrong either. Not until she crawled into bed with him, or took him to her own, whispering tender words of love and encouragement until he finally told her what was bothering him.

“What’s going on, baby?” she asked softly, his hair. “Tell noona what’s wrong.”

So he did.

He told her about what had happened with Luhan, leaving out the gritty details. He told her about how lost and alone he’d felt ever since, how his work was suffering because he couldn’t concentrate; because he’d lost his muse and now had a hole in his life, and his heart. He told her about his conversation with Jongin and how it made him sick to his stomach.

“I felt like I had to justify myself, my feelings and my actions, to him. I hated every moment of it. Loving someone shouldn’t be wrong.”

“It’s not wrong, sweetie, it’s just…complicated.” She gently brushed his hair off his forehead, looking down into his sad, shiny eyes. He looked so young…and miserable. It broke her heart. “I think he knows, deep down, that you didn’t set out to hurt him even if that was the end result. And, from what you told me, he’s been far from perfect. Perhaps that’s what makes it worse: having done to him what he’s done to others. He’s probably angry with himself but pride is a hell of a thing. He’d never admit that, and certainly not to you of all people.”

Sehun burrowed closer. “I don’t know what to do, Em. I miss him so much. Some days it feels like I can’t even function. I don’t know how much longer I can go on like this.”

Emily held him for a moment, just patting his back, murmuring soothing words.

She wasn’t really surprised that it had come to this. She’d sensed that something was amiss during their phone calls over the last couple of months and when he’d stopped coming to family dinner at their parents’ house, alarm bells had gone off in her head. Family was everything to Sehun. If he was pulling away, it had to be because he was hiding. She’d given him some time, hoping he’d sort it out on his own, but when she’d realized that that clearly wasn’t happening, she’d decided to pay him a visit, which was why she’d shown up that day, not giving him any warning in advance so he couldn’t come up with some lame excuse not to see her. Having her own copy of his house keys made her surprise that much easier. It was a good thing too, apparently. Her baby brother had hit rock bottom.

“Maybe you should go away for a while,” she said slowly, choosing her words carefully. “Perhaps some distance will help clear your head.”

Sehun sat up, brow furrowing in a frown. “You mean leave the country? Mom would kill me if I went anywhere this close to Christmas.”

“I think if she saw you right now, she’d pack you up and take you herself.” Emily ran a hand through his hair, patting it smooth. “She’ll understand. She loves you and if you didn’t insist on keeping everything to yourself, she’d already have moved in here to coddle you to death.”

Sehun made a face before lying back down with a sigh. “I can handle it. I’m just…tired.”

“Well, going away might help re-energize you. I’m not saying that you need to stay there forever. You can go back to New York for a few months, rekindle your old friendships, maybe hit up some of your art associates and see what’s new on the scene. Get back into the groove of things, minus the emotional stuff.”

“It’s not like I can just leave it behind. I can’t make myself stop loving him.”

“No, but you’d be surprised how a change of scenery can help refresh your spirit. And when you feel ready, you can come home and…well, whatever you decide. Just think about it.”

Sehun mulled it over for a minute. He couldn’t imagine leaving Korea, couldn’t imagine putting that much distance between him and Luhan no matter how ty he felt, but perhaps Emily was right. Clearly languishing in misery and self-pity wasn’t working out for him. Maybe a little vacation would do him some good.

“Okay,” he said, letting his eyes drift close. “But since it was your idea, you’re pitching this to Mom.”

Emily chuckled softly. “Deal.”

She pressed a kiss to his forehead and tightened her arms around him.

For the first time in he couldn’t remember how long, the tension within him eased and a small flame of hope flared in his chest.

Maybe everything would be fine after all.

“Pizza’s on its way.”

Luhan craned his neck up to look at Jongin as he made his way around the sofa. “What did you get?”

“Your favourite,” Jongin said, smiling and pinching his nose as he slid in beside him. He slipped an arm around his shoulders, warmth blooming in his chest when Luhan leaned into him.

“My favourite, huh? We’ll see if you actually get it right this time.”

“Oh, ye of little faith.”

Luhan nudged him with his shoulder, a smile curving his lips as he turned up the volume on some silly Spanish drama he was watching.

“I really can’t believe you enjoy this stuff,” Jongin commented.

Luhan looked at him sharply. “It’s highly entertaining, I’ll have you know.”

“It’s in Spanish! You don’t understand a word they’re saying,” Jongin retorted.

“You start to understand after a while. I may not know exactly what they’re saying but facial expressions and body language really help. I know the names of all the characters, how they’re related, who’s cheating and with whom. And, what I can’t figure out for myself, the internet provides,” Luhan informed him matter-of-factly. “That’s basically how I started to learn Korean, in case you’ve forgotten.”

“Okay, okay,” Jongin said, showing his hands as a sign of peace.

Luhan might not be the most wordy person but when he was passionate about something, he would defend it to the end. Jongin found it adorably endearing.

He liked this, liked being able to curl up on the sofa, watching silly TV shows, eating pizza – when it arrived – and just enjoying each other’s company. He liked the ease with which Luhan settled against him, leaning into him on occasion as if seeking his, Jongin’s, warmth. He liked being able to press his nose into Luhan’s hair and inhale the smell of his shampoo. He liked knowing that if he tightened his hold even a fraction, Luhan wouldn’t pull away, wouldn’t push him away.

For the first time in forever, he allowed himself to believe, to hope, that things were settling down. That they were, finally, in a good place.

The doorbell rang, just then, breaking him out of his thoughts.

Luhan raised his head. “That was quick. Did you bribe them or something?”

Jongin rolled his eyes, gently poking Luhan’s cheek as he stood up, pulling his wallet out of his pocket.

“And of course you forgot to close the gate again!” Luhan called behind him.

Chuckling to himself, Jongin reached for the doorknob without checking the security screen, a move that he would immediately regret as soon as he saw who stood on his doorstep.

“Sehun.”

At the flat tone in Jongin’s voice, Sehun braced himself.

At least he isn’t angry, he thought, looking for a silver lining.

Jongin looked at his friend – former friend – blankly, striving to control his features before he gave away too much.

Whenever Sehun appeared, two specific emotions were always at the head of the pack, warring with each other for precedence: anger and fear. He was understandably angry, and would probably be for a very long time, but he was afraid because he knew, couldn’t deny not even to himself, that Sehun posed a genuine threat to him. To him, to his happiness, to the life he wanted for himself with Luhan.

It had been about a week since their last meeting and Sehun’s words still burned. They’d struck him like physical blows and he didn’t know if he’d ever recover. He hadn’t said a word to Luhan, of course. He didn’t want Luhan thinking about Sehun, not that he could stop him from doing so on his own but he definitely wasn’t going to be the one to put him in his thoughts.

“Hey…hyung,” Sehun said quietly. There’d been a fifty-fifty chance that Jongin would answer the door – and he knew that he was home because he’d parked his car in his usual spot out front, not in the garage – so he’d tried as best as possible to brace himself. It didn’t work, though.

“What are you doing here?” Jongin asked coldly, blocking Sehun’s view of inside as he moved into the doorway.

Mustering his courage, Sehun decided to get straight to the point. “Is Luhan home?”

Jongin’s eyes narrowed, nostrils flaring, jaw tightening as his hands curled into fists. Jongin might be aggressive but Sehun had to applaud his firm control over himself. Anyone else would’ve knocked him out by now.

Instead of answering him, Jongin barked over his shoulder, “Luhan!”

He’d considered telling Sehun no, or just ordering him the off his property, but he wanted to be the bigger man, the better man, to show Luhan that he deserved him and to prove to Sehun that Luhan was right where he wanted to be. If he told Sehun to leave, it would be one more thing he’d have to hide from Luhan and he was tired of the secrecy. Lies, even by omission, had done enough damage to their relationship.

When he heard Luhan’s footsteps behind him, he moved aside, allowing the door to open wider so that they both stood within the frame.

“Sehun,” Luhan gasped, eyes wide as saucers. For a moment, the colour drained from his face before flooding back all at once, leaving him bright red.

“Hey, hyung,” Sehun greeted softly, a slight smile on his lips.

Jongin took a deep breath, counting to ten repeatedly as he tried to push down the panic that rose in his throat.

Luhan, on the other hand, was in a state of shock. Sehun was the last person he’d expected to find on his doorstep.

“What are you…” He broke off, clearing his throat. “What are you doing here?”

Sehun chanced a glance in Jongin’s direction, took in his stony face and still demeanor, arms crossed over his chest, before throwing his shoulders back. “I’ll keep this short. Lately, things haven’t been so great for me. I imagine that they’ve been a bit challenging for you two as well.”

Neither one confirmed nor denied so he continued without pause.

“My mind’s a mess and I’m simply not getting things done as I need to so… I’ve decided to go back to New York.”

That got Jongin’s attention. He unfurled from his position against the door, arms dropping to his sides.

“You’re leaving?” he asked, surprise dripping from his words. He hadn’t expected Sehun to give up, no matter how much he’d wanted him to, but leaving the country? He could never have predicted that.

Sehun nodded. “I need to clear my head. My sister thought that some distance between me and my… troubles might help. I agreed.”

Luhan went from shocked to stunned.

Sehun was leaving?

He’d known that choosing Jongin meant staying away from Sehun but despite his commitment to trying to make things work with Jongin and his assertions to Sehun that they were over, he’d never really considered what not seeing Sehun ever again would mean. It was…unimaginable, quite frankly.

“So you came to say goodbye,” Jongin finished for him.

Sehun nodded again. “And…” He reached behind him and pulled something out of his back pocket. Zeroing in on Luhan, he held it out to him. “To ask you to come with me.”

Luhan’s gaze dropped to Sehun’s proffered hand, swinging towards to Jongin when he realized what it was.

A plane ticket.

Whatever sympathy Jongin might have momentarily allowed to mix in with the anger and the fear immediately receded and an overwhelming rage consumed him. “What the are you playing at?”

Sehun turned to Jongin with a surprising centeredness, a confidence that Luhan hadn’t yet seen.

“I told you that I wasn’t going to give up on him, and I’m not. But I do have to leave. That’s something I need to do for myself. I need to get away from this place for a while. I can’t do that, however, without trying one last time.” He turned back to Luhan, his eyes so focused, so endearing that Luhan felt like they were a vacuum him in. “This is it, Hannie. This is me putting all my cards on the table. I love you, I want to be with you and I think this could be good for us. A fresh start in a new place. Everything’s already taken care of. All you have to do is show up at the airport.”

“Sehun…” Jongin said, a note of warning in his voice as he stepped forward.

Sehun glanced over at Jongin. “This is it, hyung. When I leave here today, you won’t see me again. I’m not going to call, I’m not dropping by. I’m not going to try to influence his decision in any way. It’s entirely up to him.” Sehun shifted his gaze back to Luhan. “I just want you to be happy, and I’d like to be the one that makes you happy. Search your heart, Hannie, and make the choice that’s right for you. Whether it’s him, me…or neither of us.”

Luhan’s lips trembled. “Sehun-ah…”

“Well, if we’re baring our souls, I have something to say too,” Jongin announced.

Luhan froze, head swiveling towards Jongin what felt like an inch per minute. What now?

Jongin smiled tenderly, reaching into the pocket of his jeans to pull out a box.

“This isn’t how I’d planned on doing this but I’ll be damned if I don’t throw my own hat in the ring. No pun intended.”

He opened the box, withdrawing a ring. Bright, gleaming stones spanned the circumference, set in a platinum base.

Jongin lifted Luhan’s left hand. “I’m not good at flowery words or grand gestures but…I love you, Luhan, and it would mean so much to me if you’d do me the honor of marrying me.”

If ever there was a time to faint, to swoon, this was it, Luhan thought.

It was a scene straight out of his telenovelas. He wanted to pinch himself to see if it was real because he simply couldn’t wrap his mind around the ridiculousness of it.

Jongin could see that Luhan was struggling, could see the shock that had yet to fade since he’d set eyes on Sehun, so he didn’t take it personally when he remained speechless.

“I’m not asking for an answer right now,” he continued, slipping the ring onto Luhan’s ring-finger. “But I want you to wear this as a token of my commitment to you, to us, until you’re ready to give me one.”

Sehun watched the entire exchange as if viewing a movie in the theater. He felt a sense of detachment, of being removed from time and space despite knowing that what he was seeing was actually happening right in front of him.

He recovered a lot faster than Luhan, though, and found himself wanting to pat Jongin on the back, hand him a cigar and give him a round of applause.

So this is how a Master works, he thought. Well played, hyung. Well played.

He inclined his head slightly towards Jongin in acknowledgement and saw what he thought was an answering tilt of the head and curve at the corner of Jongin’s lips as if to say “Thank you”.

“I’d better get going,” Sehun said.

He held out the ticket to Luhan again, who took it with numb fingers. Sehun allowed his thumb to brush over Luhan’s knuckles before dropping his hand.

He looked deeply, pleadingly, into Luhan’s eyes. “I’ll wait as long as I can. I hope to see you there.”

Glancing over at Jongin once last time, Sehun walked backwards down the stairs, taking his fill of Luhan’s dumbstruck yet still beautiful face before turning, climbing into his car and driving away.

“I’m going to call the pizza place and see what’s taking them so long,” Jongin stated softly, patting Luhan’s shoulder gently before leaving him to his thoughts.

Luhan glanced at Jongin’s retreating back before swinging his gaze towards the now-empty driveway.

He felt like he’d been in a car accident and was experiencing some serious whiplash. Everything was coming at him from all sides and he couldn’t get his thoughts together. He couldn’t speak, couldn’t move and felt like the walls were literally closing in on him. The end result was that he was more confused than ever but more than that, his chest physically hurt and for a second, he had to wonder if he was having a heart-attack. He knew that he wasn’t but he was probably on the verge of another panic attack. After years without them, they’d returned with a vengeance.

As the chill night air blew around him, his gaze fell to his hands, shifting from the ring on his finger to the ticket in his other hand.

Three people, two choices, one life-changing decision that he didn’t know if he could make.

What was he going to do?

A/N: I'll tell you what to do, Lulu: run as far away from those two as you possibly can.

We're finally at the end, my lovelies. One more chapter to go then it's goodbye to this insanity forever...

BTW: I NEVER said that Hunhan was not going to happen!! Yall need to go back and re-read that spoiler post here. Keep in mind that I wrote that post a year ago so most of the contents has already happened and what hasn't (#2-5) will either take place in the final chapter or the Epilogue.