Oh gosh, am I really posting?? So soon?!
I really do think I deserve an applause lol xD

This chapter is long! Be happy!
It's also very boring! Be sad! xD
Don't be angry though, because I really worked hard on this one, put a lot of time in it.

Enjoy! Who else is having these Sekai feels, woohooo!
Tinywings
 

Sehun never meant to run away from Jongin. Jongin was his best friend and his presence meant a lot to Sehun, so no, by no means was his intention to avoid Jongin. However, Sehun knew Jongin long enough to understand what Jongin was implying when he glared at him angrily. Actually, everyone would be able to get that. He simply also knew the consequences if he tried to run away again.

It was quite easy to avoid talking to Jongin the first day, but so much harder the next day and almost impossible the day after. Maybe Sehun should be happy, really happy, to realize that Jongin put his presence so high, because Jongin had noticed his absence almost immediately and he had looked for him and the other would have found him straight away if Sehun was not so ridiculously good at escaping.

He felt like a little girl, really.

“Oh Sehun, stop right there.”

Freeze. It felt like he was caught, and he did not even did anything bad. Well, maybe he did. He wanted to believe he did not.

“You’re avoiding me,” Jongin stated as he approached him, eyes fixed on him intently.

“N-Not really,” Sehun cursed intently at himself for stuttering at such a moment, “I’ve no idea what you’re talking about.”

“What’s wrong with you?” Jongin asked sternly.

“Nothing.” Sehun almost whispered, so low his voice was, “It’s nothing.”

“You’re acting like an elementary scholar, Sehun, of course something’s wrong with you.”

This caused Sehun to grit his teeth in frustration. He did not need to hear this from Jongin. Not from him, anyone but him. Not when he was the cause for Sehun’s shameful behavior.

“I just have a lot to do.”

“We’ve the same classes,” Jongin pointed out immediately, crushing his lie mercilessly.

Sehun bit his lip, trying to think of something else, “I… I want to think about things in peace.”

That, fortunately, was not a lie, because he really was thinking about things and he really did want quietness and peacefulness. The fact that he was not lying made him a little bit more confident in front of Jongin, something he desperately needed at the moment.

“About what?”

About you, me, us, Sehun wanted to say, but of course, he did not. That would sound too cheesy, too not Sehun, too not something for the two of them to talk about.

“About life.”

If this was not supposed to be an utterly serious conversation, Sehun would have laughed at his own response. If this was not so important, but it really was, so this was not the moment to laugh at his own answers.

“You’re not funny.” Jongin eyed him before sighing, “Look, I don’t know what’s wrong with you all of a sudden, but I don’t like it. You… Come over to my house after school today. I don’t have practice.”

Jongin always talked like that, and Sehun would always say no. That was just their way of communication. However, deep inside, Sehun knew. Deep inside, Sehun really liked the idea. Deep inside, this was all Sehun ever wanted from the start. He wanted to spend some time with Jongin, being sarcastic to each other and playing lame video games. He wanted to tease Jongin and he wanted to hear Jongin complaining about everything. He just wanted that. Nothing else, just that.

“And I’ll introduce you to Kyungsoo.” Jongin smiled warmly, “You two never really met each other before, and I want him to meet my best friend.”

“And I’ll introduce you to Kyungsoo.”

That, though, did not sound good. That sounded wrong, all wrong. He did not need to know who Kyungsoo was. He did not need to meet Kyungsoo, Jongin’s Kyungsoo. He did not need to see who that so-called Kyungsoo was, whoever he was. He had seen him once, and that was enough. Sehun was so caught up that it took him moments before he calmed down a little, his eyes blinking while he looked confused.

Why was he so against this all?

“Come, okay?” Jongin said while looking into his eyes, trying to find some confirmation.

Maybe Sehun really did know why he was like this. He just did not want to admit it.

-

“And I’ll introduce you to Kyungsoo.”

Life loved to make Sehun stumble. Make him trip over small, unnoticeable rocks of problems. It pained Sehun quite a lot, really, because the problem was that these problems were too big to overlook, but too small to be seen as a real problem by the world. Teenage life could be unbearably hard when these problems accumulated, becoming such a heavy burden that could not be removed anymore. Sehun was not there yet, not yet to the point of no return, but he felt himself going there. He felt the load on his shoulders growing heavier with each day, just a little bit day by day.

“Come, okay?”

Sehun was not good at judging people. Whether someone was sincere or not, he never knew, and he long stopped caring about it. He may look tough and all on the outside, but really, he was just a clueless child in the inside. He believed everything people said, not in the sense that he would jump off a cliff just because somebody said he should, but in the way that when people said something regarding a matter, he would believe them. He never saw the reasons why someone would purposely lie about something, hide the truth when it really was not even that important to begin with. Like when that one classmate told him he does not like to eat candy, because it is unhealthy, when Sehun clearly saw him munching on some chocolate bars just a week later. Sehun did not understand why someone would say such a thing, when he gained nothing out of it, except for fooling a clueless Sehun, but he wondered just how much that was worth.

So, in the same way as he could never judge whether that boy lied to him when he said he did not like candy, he could not judge whether Jongin really wanted him to be there or not. No, he did not even question it. It was like his cousin who always asked him if he wanted a piece of his chocolate when really, he did not even wanted to share with Sehun at all. Sehun never knew that, always accepted the chocolate, and only later realized that it was him taking the offer that made his cousin dislike him. Why offer him the chocolate then? Sehun would not dislike him even if he did not offer him, really. Maybe Sehun just did not see the real reason.

As for Jongin, there really was no reason for Jongin to lie to him. He could just say ‘Hey, Sehun, I know we’re best friends and all, but I really don’t want you to ruin my precious time with Kyungsoo’ and really, Sehun would not be mad at him. Well, disappointment was bound to arise, but he was not going to hate Jongin just because of that.

“We’re together now.”

Why did everything sound so wrong? It was supposed to sound good, right. Sehun was supposed to be happy for Jongin, because his arrogant, sarcastic best friend had found someone. It was a good thing. And really, it was not even like they were going to last that long. High school love never last.

Sehun blinked his eyes.

Did… Did he really think that?

“It’s okay, Jongin, it’s okay…” Sehun hesitated a moment before hugging the other, “He’s not worth your tears.”

Jongin tried to kiss Kyungsoo, but got pushed away by Kyungsoo. It really had hurt his pride, Jongin said, but Sehun knew better than to think that was the reason for him crying his eyes out. Sehun was not a mind-reader, but certain things, especially when it came to Jongin, he knew.

“Sehun…” Jongin mumbled through his sobs, “Sehun…”

“You’re just going to have to be stuck with me, Jongin.”

Stuck with… Him?

“You know, if one day I find myself a new best friend and dump you like a piece of trash, don’t cry and beg me to take you back, because I won’t.”

“Tell me when you find someone else who is willing to suffer because of you. I would be more than happy to give him my place.”

Happy…?

“You like him a lot, Sehun-sshi.”

Wrong. Wrong. This was wrong. Something was wrong.

Sehun looked up when he heard the bus arriving, his feet so reluctant to move, his mind screaming not to step inside. Wrong. Wrong. So much wrong. Too much wrong.

“Hey, kid, you stepping in or not?” The bus chauffeur asked him with an irritated expression.

“I… I…” Sehun’s eyes darted around, “I…”

“Come, okay?”

He shut his eyes tightly for a second before opening them again, stepping inside the bus with a numb mind. Too much was going on his mind for him to think clearly anymore. And actually, honestly, he was happy about that. If he saw things to clearly, he might get scared. He might get anxious. No, seeing things blurry was good, yes, very good.

He mindlessly took place somewhere at the back of the bus, his glazed eyes looking terribly empty all of a sudden, but he could not bring himself to focus on anything. Not on the chair in front of him, the view outside, or the thoughts inside him mind. It was just blurriness.

“Sehun-sshi.”

And then there came this soothing voice that grabbed Sehun’s attention and made him focus.  He did not even want to focus, but he still did, and it was all because of the bus boy. He slowly turned around, eyes gradually losing its glassiness as he did, to meet the other’s eyes. Warm, gentle eyes.

“Going to Jongin, again?”

Sehun focused on what Luhan was saying, on the intonation, the sound, the way it all reached his ears. He was not focusing on the content. He was focusing, yet not.

“Sehun-sshi?”

This time, he did elaborate the content, “Y-Yes?”

“You’re quite distracted today,” Luhan said with a laugh, “I asked you if you’re going to Jongin again.”

Distracted? Sehun was focusing, not distracted, “A-Ah, yes, I am.”

“What are you two going to do?” Luhan asked curiously.

Eat some chips, kill some zombies, the usual, Sehun wanted to say out of automaticity, because that was what they always did, but this time, it was not like that. It lied on the tip of his tongue, and it felt so normal to let those words be spoken, but this time, it was not like that. It hurt to swallow down those words again, it burned his throat. However, it hurt more to formulate a new sentence, a sentence so foreign, so unreal.

“Jongin’s going to introduce me to Kyungsoo.” Sehun said, and it sounded as if someone had forced the words in his mouth, because it was spoken with no such thing as feelings or emotions.

“Kyungsoo?” The other asked.

“We’re together now.”

“They’re together.”

That was not exactly an answer, Sehun knew, but that was all his mind could come up with. Jongin and Kyungsoo: They were together.

“I…” Luhan’s eyebrows knitted together, “I see.”

Sehun stayed still and silent, eyes turning unfocused again. It felt wrong, all so wrong. He felt wrong. He wished this bus would never reach Jongin’s house, so he would never have to get out and go to Jongin’s house and meet Kyungsoo. Reality was still too early for him, he himself still too unprepared. He would rather sit in the bus, because that comforted him.

“Bus rides are great, aren’t they?”

Sehun focused again, once again on Luhan. It really was not that hard to focus on Luhan’s talking, or anything of the bus boy, really, and Sehun even wished that the bus boy could just talk, talk, talk without stopping, because suddenly blurriness did not feel right anymore and focusing felt so much more right.

“They clear your minds,” Luhan continued, “makes all your problems go away for the moment. Joonmyun always said bus rides are the best medicine to all problems.”

“You’re really sure he said medicine?” Sehun said with the slightest bit of a smile.

Luhan laughed, “I don’t know. My Korean wasn’t very good back then.”

That caused Sehun to laugh too, “But indeed, bus rides are really good.”

The bus boy nodded his head eagerly, “Yes, they are.”

“Of course they are for you,” Sehun smirked playfully, “you met him in a bus, after all.”

“We met in a bus too,” Luhan answered back with a cheeky grin.

“Yes,” Sehun’s lips curved into a smile, “yes we did.”

Now that he thought about it, it had been a while already. Months ago, bus boy was still a weird stranger to him, but now, they were to the point of being able to talk to each other comfortably already. Now the scary stranger in the back was no longer the bus boy anymore, but Luhan.

“Do… Do I really look like Joonmyun?”

“More than you could imagine,” Luhan said earnestly, “much more.”

“Even as handsome as me?” Sehun asked cheekily.

Luhan laughed brightly, “No, you’re handsomer.”

“I’m not sure whether he would appreciate that coming from you,” Sehun said while grinning.

“Appearance was never his strongest point,” Luhan said with glinting eyes, “he had the most ridiculous mother-like hairstyles sometimes.”

“Mother-like?” Sehun asked with blinking eyes before he burst out laughing, “You mean ahjumma?”

“Yah, stop laughing!” Luhan yelled at him embarrassedly.

“I’m sorry, but it’s just so funny!” Sehun laughed so hard tears were escaping his eyes.

Luhan frowned unhappily, “It’s mean to laugh at someone because of that.”

“And I sincerely apologize. Do know I laugh with a genuine heart.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Sehun shrugged his shoulders, laughter still escaping his mouth. “I don’t know, I think I’m getting affected by you.”

Luhan folded his arms together as he looked at Sehun with mock anger, “Always a pleasure being the clown.” His expression then softened, “You’re here.”

“Eh?” Sehun’s laughter deafened instantly as his eyes roamed around, his gaze landing outside, “Oh…”

All careless happiness he felt just now had disappeared because he was there, Jongin’s house so close. He felt the chaos inside his head coming up again, and once again. Luhan had done such a good job grabbing his attention just now, making him forget about the reality he had to face.

“I… I…” Sehun bit his lip as he noticed the bus stopping and the door opening, “I…”

“What’s wrong? Go, you should get out here.” Luhan said as he watched Sehun.

“And I’ll introduce you to Kyungsoo.”

An annoying beep sound reached his ears, telling him that the doors were going to close very soon.

“Sehun-sshi!”

 “We’re together now.”

He watched as the door slowly began to close again.

“Sehun-sshi,” Luhan spoke out his name, “Sehun-sshi…”

His heart fell upon seeing the doors close.

“Sehun-sshi…”

“I… I don’t want to go…” Sehun hid his face behind the seat, “I don’t want to go.”

Wrong. Wrong. Too much wrong. He was so wrong. Why was he like this? It was ridiculous. He was eighteen, already of such age, so why was he like this? Why was he acting like a little child?

“Sehun-sshi…” Luhan’s voice was soft, but Sehun could hear it all too clearly, “Would you want to get some bubble tea with me? You like chocolate flavor, right?”

“Now I look at you more closely, chocolate flavor does seem to fit you.”

Sehun slowly looked up, “You… You remember?”

Luhan simply smiled back. He did not ask. He did not question. He just sat there, smiling, being there.

Just that.

“Let’s enjoy our bus ride.”  Luhan said with a smile.

Yeah, maybe he should.

Sehun looked outside the window, the view passing by so rapidly that he could not focus on anything. It was quite pleasant, really, blurriness yet with a kind of focus.

With the focus this time Luhan’s reflection in the window glass.

-

“Here you go, chocolate flavor bubble tea!”

Sehun accepted it gratefully, a childish smile plastered on his lips, “Thank you.”

“No problem,” Luhan said as he took place opposite of him.

“It feels like we’re good friends when we’re sitting like this, drinking bubble tea together,” Sehun smiled warmly.

Luhan looked at him with those bright, innocent eyes and a smile so sincere, “Aren’t we then?”

If someone were to tell Sehun months ago that he would eventually be friends with the bus boy, he would have laughed at it, because it sounded so ridiculous. However, right now, he was indeed sitting in a bubble tea shop with said male, and he was indeed comfortable around him like he would be with a friend. Life was as unpredictable as that, really.

“Yes,” Sehun nodded with a smile, “yes, we are.”

Luhan smile stayed for a few seconds before it slowly vanished, replaced by a rather serious expression, “I… I probably shouldn’t mingle myself with it, but…”

“S-Say it,” Sehun said a little nervous because it was quite obvious what Luhan was referring to, “it’s okay.”

Luhan looked into his eyes intently, “Do you feel like you can’t live without Jongin?”

“It’s a fact that a person can live on its own, without anyone. You don’t need anyone to survive, to live. However, when you find this person that makes you believe that without him, you can’t live, then that means you’ve grown to love that person.”

Sehun’s gaze fell on his bubble tea cup.

“Sehun, take this!”

“What’s it?”

“Chocolate flavored bubble tea!”

In other words, did he love Jongin?

“You already know the answer, don’t you?”
 

And the next update will be in 2014
Long live cliffhangers~!