6

Still Sit Here Alone

Calvin laughed along with her.

“I’ve never done that before. I’ve always done whatever she’s wanted,” Hebe admitted then turned to Calvin, her smile disappearing from her face as if she realized she was talking aloud.

Calvin smiled back then turned toward the street.

“I’ve never seen Aaron like that,” Calvin said. “He’s never stood up against his mom like that. He would never argue.”

“How come?” Hebe asked wanting to know more about Aaron.

“He’s not really that kind of a person,” Calvin went on, “he’s the type that usually keeps things to himself. He’d rather do stuff on his own than ask for help you know?”

“Really?” Hebe asked then smiled. “It sounds just like him.”

“Let me ask you,” Calvin began, “you knew about the engagement plan didn’t you?”

Hebe looked at Calvin then looked away guiltily nodding.

“Why did you agree?” Calvin asked.

Hebe was silent before answering, “For my mom, I’d do it…and…I’ve always liked Aaron…but he…he…he likes someone else, right?”

Calvin looked at her surprised.

“I have nothing to say to that,” Calvin tried to shrug her question off. “I mean…you should ask him.”

Hebe pressed her lips together and smiled softly as if to herself, “Selina’s really a nice person. I should have never let my mom treat her like that because I really like Selina.”

Calvin stared at Hebe wondering if she knew about Aaron’s big crush on Selina. He almost wanted to lean over and hug Hebe, but held himself back and focused on the blank road ahead.

***

Aaron stared at the totally silent Selina sitting next to him in the cab. She had cried for what seemed like hours and to Aaron, it looked like she was crying about something else. His heart painfully ached for her because he did not know how to talk to her there and then. He did not know how to make her trust him enough to tell him all about her problems. He did not want Selina to face them all by herself, if possible he wanted to help her carry them too. He would have to try again another day, because Selina’s heart was so closed up it was difficult to get her to open up.

The cab stopped shortly outside of Jiro’s house. Aaron turned to Selina quickly afraid he could not say his words before she would walk out.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry I asked you to go. I’m really sorry my mother did that to you. She had no right to. It’s all my fault.” Aaron apologized.

“It’s ok. You’ve already apologized a lot,” Selina assured.

Her hair covered the side of her face and she did not turn to look at him.

“But…will you…come again to the bakery?” asked Aaron.

He was more afraid he’d never see her again.

“Bye,” was Selina’s reply before she opened the door and closed it.

Aaron watched painfully fearing that was really Selina’s goodbye to him. How would he live on now?

***

The house seemed silent to Selina when she ran her eyes around the living room. She had realized while being with Aaron that she was only staying with Jiro in hopes of being able to see him everyday and watching him smile, hear his laughter…she was just clinging onto him blindly. She was using her fear of returning back to her house as an excuse…a lame excuse.

Selina could no longer stay in the Wang household.

Selina opened the door to her room quietly and got out her small bag finding her clothes. She started folding them and placing them neatly and slowly into the bag. Before leaving she wanted to stay away from being sad so she focused on only the task at hand.

“What are you doing?” a voice asked from behind.

Selina turned abruptly to find Jiro standing at the doorway. Her heart thumped and she felt immediately like crying. Selina ignored his question and continued with the task at hand.

“I said, what are you doing?” Jiro repeated himself.

Selina ignored him again. Silently Jiro moved toward her and gripped her wrist with his strong hold.

“I asked, what are you doing,” Jiro began, “what’s wrong? Selina answer me.”

Selina turned her face away.

“You were gone for the whole day. It’s midnight now! Selina! What happened! Did Aaron do something to you?” Jiro questioned.

Selina tried blinking her tears back.

“Selina!” Jiro exclaimed loudly putting his hands on her shoulders and forced her to turn to look at him. Once he succeeded, Jiro stared at her face. “Why are you crying?”

Selina couldn’t help it. She had to breakdown again. Her sobbing grew louder. It was as if recalling her mother's words had opened a fountain somewhere within her.

“I hate you!” Selina shouted hitting him with her fists. “You never came back! You never came back in time! You’re too many years too late! You’re too late! I hate you! I hate you!”

Jiro stared at her with wide surprised eyes. Too many years too late? What did she mean by that? He didn't know what to do at that moment. He didn’t know what to do to make her stop crying, so he leaned forward planting a kiss on her lip. Selina felt her blood run slowly as she returned his many small kisses. Before Selina realized it, she was mingled with Jiro, the bed sheets wrinkled underneath them. He stopped his kisses a few minutes later and Selina could still feeling his hot breath on her face.

“Lets get married,” Jiro said suddenly.

Selina stared up at him feeling her last tear make its way down her face. She blinked up at him then turned away. Jiro rolled off her feeling sweat through his clothes. Selina wanted to throw off her jacket and just lay there to cool down. Her mind whirled around about what just happened. It was just a kiss…too intense…at least they didn’t go that far…

“If your mom sees us like this…we’ll be in trouble,” Selina said.

“The more reason for us to marry,” Jiro his side and put his arm around her.

“I…I’ll think about it,” Selina promised a few minutes after thinking, then pushed his arms off her. “You should go to your room.”

“You’ll leave,” Jiro reasoned.

“I won’t. I promise,” Selina told and urged him again to leave.

“Alright,” Jiro moaned and got off the bed.

He turned back to look at her one more time before closing the door behind him.

Selina to her side and clutched onto the pillow. Her heart was still pounding from what just had happened. Fear…fear was still holding onto her. She shut her eyes and right away Aaron’s smiling face appeared.

“Why him?” Selina questioned confused yet feeling comforted.

She could still remember the way he held her against him tightly.

***

Aaron walked up the stairs lazily. He guessed that Sam must be out somewhere drinking or already sleeping in his own room because he was no where to be seen. Aaron opened the door to his and Calvin’s room to find that Calvin had not returned yet either. Suddenly, he finally remembered that Calvin had been there too…watching the whole argument. He must be shocked.

Aaron didn’t bother turning the lights on. He leaned against the wall and slid down into a sitting position.

He allowed his mind go over everything. However much he wanted, he could not stop thinking about Selina. Though he didn’t know a lot about her, he felt really attached. He wanted more and more of her. If only…there wasn’t Jiro. Selina was totally in love with Jiro. She would probably hate him for the rest of her life starting tomorrow. On the other hand, Aaron still felt angry with his mom. She had treated Selina so poorly. Even name calling her. He knew it was wrong but at that moment he felt ashamed of his mother. He should have done something sooner, if only he wasn’t so stupid. Aaron sighed. He couldn’t hate anyone. All he wanted was to have Selina close to him, next to him, he almost wished he could lay next to her to comfort her because that way he would be able to sleep more peacefully.

***

Calvin opened the door a few hours after Aaron and walked up the stairs, stopped and opened the door to his uncles room to find his uncle lying asleep on the bed. Calvin walked in and pulled the covers over his uncle. Ever since Calvin moved in, his uncle had been a little happier. Sam had lost his wife in a conflict and in the end she had chosen another man. Sam had gone into depression for quite a while and that was when Calvin had chipped in to help take care of the restaurant Sam had neglected.

Calvin left the room and went into his room to find Aaron lying carelessly on the bed. Calvin sighed and went to sleep on his own bed. It had been an awfully stressful day.

***

Once Hebe entered the door she found just what she expected, scolding from her mother.

“You totally embarrassed me! How could you say that to me in front of that…that girl!” Mrs. Tian questioned. “You make me look like a horrible person!”

“I was just saying what you taught me. Wise words you always said,” Hebe shot back very calmly.

“Hebe!” Mrs. Tian shouted. “I never taught you to use the words in that twisted way!”

“Yes, mother.” Hebe sighed deciding not to go on, realizing it would only get worse. “I’m sorry and I won’t do it again.”

Obviously, Hebe was planning to do it again...somehow.

She climbed up the stairs with her mom’s bellowing voice behind her and went into her room closing the door behind her. She went over to her bed and jumped onto it exhausted. She let out a huge sigh. She had just sat in the car silently with Calvin for hours and they drove around town for a while with small hopes of finding Aaron and Selina.

The both of them had felt troubled and extremely frustrated and tired. On the other hand, it had been nice of him to offer to drive her back home. Hebe closed her eyes wondering if Aaron was safe and wondered how Selina would be feeling now. Would she hate her because of her mother? Hebe sighed and turned over so she was facing the ceiling above.

“Just go to sleep,” she told herself and placed her arm over her eyes.

***

Selina awoke later than usual. The restaurant was the first thing on her mind when she awoke, but decided to think about it later and pushed the thought of going there aside. She slowly opened the bedroom door and walked out just in time to overhear Jiro’s conversation with his mom.

“Mom, I’m getting married,” Jiro said a little shyly.

Selina’s eyes perked up from the ground to look toward the kitchen.

“Is it Selina?” Mrs. Wang asked.

Jiro nodded a smile creeping onto his face.

“That’s great! Selina agreed?!” Mrs. Wang questioned.

“Well…she hasn’t said anything but I’m pretty sure she’ll say yes,” Jiro now sounded confident. “You still like her a lot, don’t you?”

“What are you saying?! She’s the perfect daughter in law!” Mrs. Wang said happily. “I can’t wait to tell your sister. She’ll be so happy! She missed Selina a lot after you left because Selina never visited anymore.”

“It’s alright, mom. I’ll go wake Selina up now,” Jiro told and started to walk out of the kitchen.

Not wanting to be caught eavesdropping Selina quickly ran back to the bedroom to stand behind the closed door and soon enough Jiro was knocking on it.

“Selina? Are you awake?” questioned Jiro from the other side.

“Yea…I’ll be out in a minute,” Selina slightly turned her heaad to the side to look at the wooden wall between them.

“Ok, hurry up,” Jiro urged and Selina could hear his footsteps quietly disappear.

Selina sighed and felt like sinking into the ground. Now that Mrs. Wang knew, what would Selina do? She hadn’t really planned on marrying Jiro because she would be no good to him anyway…but they were so insistent…what would she do now? More importantly, how would she find a way out?

Selina gulped and reached for the doorknob.

She could feel it. The pounding of her heart. Her nerves felt wrecked in every little way and her nervousness did not subside as she stepped into the kitchen. Mrs. Wang smiled at her, Jiro was waiting for her.

“Good morning, Selina,” Mrs. Wang greeted kindly.

Selina smiled in reply and started to take a seat.

“Go sit by Jiro, I already placed your plate over there,” Mrs. Wang instructed.

Selina stopped and glanced at the empty plate next to Jiro. Selina knew it was wrong but she didn’t want to...it just didn’t feel the same. Years ago she had been so close to Jiro, but now she just wanted to distance herself however close he wanted to get. Selina obeyed and sat next to Jiro uncomfortably. Selina started to reach for her plate but Jiro grabbed it before she could.

“I’ll get it for you,” Jiro offered and started to put food onto it then placed the plate back in front of her.

“Thanks,” Selina quietly said wondering if the pounding of her heart could be heard.

“Do you have work today?” questioned Mrs. Wang.

“Probably,” Selina replied as she grabbed her chopsticks.

“Why don’t you stay home instead?” Mrs. Wang suggested then laughed. “This house will be your house soon enough anyway. You’ll be a really great daughter in law.”

Selina looked from Mrs. Wang to Jiro.

“I…I…” Selina glanced at them once more. “I’m sorry…I haven’t really thought about it.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Jiro tried. “Mom’s just a little anxious, don’t mind her.”

Selina smiled and felt Jiro grab her hand from underneath the table. She averted her eyes elsewhere wondering how she would survive the rest of the morning.

***

Aaron kept half of his attention on the door during the morning. Selina wasn’t anywhere. She wasn’t waiting by the door that morning and she hadn’t come in. He couldn’t help, but wonder what was keeping her. Was it because she didn’t want to see him? That must be it. His mother must have insulted her pride. She wouldn’t be able to face him.

“Aaron?” Calvin’s voice came.

Aaron spun around alarmed.

“Hey man, calm down,” Calvin assured. “She’ll be here.”

“Yea, Selina isn’t that kind of weak person, she won’t let it get to her that easily,” Sam agreed. “So stop staring at the door.”

“I’m…I’m not!” Aaron retorted.

“Stop lying,” Sam said throwing a wet towel into the sink.

“You at lying,” Calvin commented and turned around.

Aaron sighed and walked toward the stove.

***

“Here?” Jiro asked stopping his car in front of a brick building. “I’ve never seen this place before.”

Selina smiled nervously, “It’s just a place I go to once in a while.”

“You’ve never told me about it,” Jiro said.

“Well…I don’t have to tell you everything, right?” Selina questioned.

Jiro looked at her and smiled, “When we’re married, you’ll have to.”

Selina laughed nervously and started to open the door.

“Wait,” Jiro said making Selina look back. “Take care.”

After kissing her on the forehead, Selina seemed to rush out and walk toward the building fast. Jiro waved after her and drove off.

Selina sighed and heaved a sigh while closing her eyes and after doing so she opened the door. She walked in only to find something run into her leg. Selina gave a shout of surprise and looked down to see a little boy with his arms around her leg. He smiled up at her with both rows of his teeth showing.

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leichanla #1
I read this before! I think ?