My heart stopped. Without seeing her face for this long made me realize just how dependent I was of her when we were together. Through the blurriness of my drunken state, my vision suddenly went clear due to the near sight of her.

I opened my mouth and tried to say something, anything, to make her not go, to make her stay. But nothing came out.

“Wooyoung, you know you’re drunk right.” She said with what Iooked like regret and guilt written across her face, “Aish, you babo! Don’t punish yourself like this, nothing good comes out of it.” Then she quickly helped me get up.

Finally up on my feet, I looked at her properly. She seemed aged, tired, and pale. A wave of sadness rushed through me, unable to help myself, I lifted my weak trembling hand to touch her stone cold cheeks. I flinched, her cheeks were never this cold.

“I-IU-ah.” I managed to pull out these few words, I looked at her longingly, “I missed you.”

She looked away from my pleading eyes, causing me not being able to see hers. And when she looked back at me, her face was cold. Her emotions were blank.

“Yah, you need to pull yourself together. This little thing can’t possibly drag you down to this kind of state. You need to understand that it’s over. Done. Drinking your guts out won’t improve anything.” And with that, she left.

IU’s POV

What the hell am I doing here? Screw you Nichkhun. Screw you.

I stood outside of the huge club, with its wild, crazy and loud music blasting out of it with extreme volume. Nichkhun called me yesterday with an unknown number so I picked up. That was the first step to mistake. And actually coming here was the second.

I can’t help but sigh, this is where Wooyoung have been staying for the past few days? Maybe leaving him wasn’t such a good idea, seeing how much he’s suffering pained me possibly even more than it pained him, maybe staying with him until the end was better, I could at least enjoy my last few days with him instead of crying myself to sleep every night knowing that he’s doing the same.

Aish IU, what are you thinking? Are you that selfish? Are you willing to let him suffer because you don’t want to endure the pain?

I took a deep breath, and stepped into the club.

Immediately, I was suffocated by the sea of people bouncing along to the music. I ducked my head down, praying that I won’t get recognized by any fans and stick to my mission. Where are you Wooyoung?

I slowly advanced toward the back of the club, where the bar was located. Craning my head to find the face that I knew so well.

 Suddenly, I felt someone bump into me. I was about to yell in protest when I heard a familiar voice. A voice that I could recognize from anywhere.

“Yah! Watch i-!" I looked down, just in time when the other voice looked up.

It was him.

A wave of emotions ran through me as I saw his face, he was drunk, just like Nichkhun said he would be. I fought with the urge to not cry, knowing that it was all my fault. "Wooyoung." His name escaped from my lips, and I looked sadly at him trying to pull some words out.

"Wooyoung, you know you're drunk right." I felt extremely guilty and sad, he can't stay like this forever, I'll be gone soon, he needs to get used to it, "Aish you babo, don't punish yourself like this, nothing good comes out of it." I slowly pulled him up.

I saw him pull his hands up to touch my face, his hand was so warm against my cold ones. I wanted to grab them and never let go.

"I-IU-ah, I missed you."

That's when I lost it, I felt the tears flow down my face. But I quickly turned away from him trying to hide the pain that I am in.

 IU. Be strong. Don't let your emotions seek through. You can't let him see that you're suffering. Act like you don't care, act like he's nothing to you. It's all for him. For him.

"Yah, you need to pull yourself together." Each word was like a needle to me, stabbing myself with my own words. How pathetic, "This little thing can't possibly drag you down to this state. You need to understand that it's over. Done. Drinking your guts out won't improve anything." My voice broke on the last word, tears formed itself once again in my eye. I struggled to pull my feet to work.

Leave IU, leave.

So I left, each step was taken with great measures, each step was like stepping on glass. Knowing that behind me, I left the person that I love with my life to it's dreadful state once again. He needs to be able to live on his own, maybe my words will wake him. Maybe he'll find a good girl, a healthy one to stay with him for eternity, so when I leave, he can forget all about me and continue on with his life.

When you love someone, you're willing to sacrifice everything for them. When you love someone, you'll wish that they will live a happy life even if you won't end up together.

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