A very smol, very sad Jenlisa story... sorry :( Based on the song "Nothing" by The Script

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"Hey!, it’s me, Lisa ,I’m sorry I punched Kai but he was kissing you and… and you love me right?" she’s drunk, you can tell, you hear the sound of something, or rather someone falling "Oh … that hurt.. no Ch..chaeyoung im fine… gimme the phone back… Jen you there… you know they’re saying you don't love me cuz you know you broke up with me…and you’re dating Kai again but  that's not true right… you love me…you.. you love me like I love you right?.. cuz I do, I love you… whoa.. the sidewalk just moved… Jenie… baby.. tell them.. tell them you love me.. and that you’re were just trying to make jealous tell them baby , we're still together right?.. Jen" you can't take it anymore, you don't know what to say, you're afraid to open your mouth and hurt her even more, even though you know she won’t remember anything tomorrow.

Ten minutes later , no less you're still sitting in the same spot next to your phone just like you do every night after her call , wondering what happened to you, to her, to the both of you, when was it that all went down the drain?, you look around your house, you see your wall full pictures, and then you look at your favorite picture of the both of you, you were looking at each other like nothing was wrong in the world, you remember that day, it was the day she gave you that promise ring, the ring you still wear around your neck everyday unknown by her, you remember that day.. is your favorite memory…

"You said you'll follow me to New York"

"I did"

"You said I was beautiful"

"You are"

"I don't believe you"

"Then I'll say it for the rest of my life if I have to" she cupped your face with both of her hands, making you look straight to hers, "Jen you're the most beautiful person I've ever met , I'd be stupid if I ever let you go, I love you ok?, you got me forever" she pulls you in to a kiss, it makes you speechless, always does ,"Open your eyes" she says , you open them and she's placing a ring on your finger, you look at her in wonder, she explains that this is her promise to you, that no matter what she'll never give up, and she'll never let you go without a fight.

Is after this moment you realize you are still in love with her, you realize that her calling drunk every night saying she loves you it actually her not letting you go, giving you a chance to hold on, to make you realize that whatever you’re doing with Kai you’re doing it out of fear not of love, the next day she always calls saying that she's sorry to have called you drunk but not for saying that she still loves you, you always say nothing.

After what seems like hours you hear someone screaming your name and knocking on you door, you look at the clock, just in time…

"Jen?...Jenie come oon.. ope… open your door., I love you" you hear some shuffling and you realize her friends are here to take her home, usually you go to room after this and cry yourself to sleep`, but this time you stay there, tears cascading down your eyes, listening to the muffled conversation outside

"Why does she do this to herself? Jennie moved on, she’s getting married for God sakes!" you hear another girl’s voice, you’re pretty sure it’s Jisoo

"I don't know, unnie, she's not ready to move on I guess, she needs closure?, I don't know…" that's Chaeyoung, she's always the one who comes, you're thankful she has a friend that takes care of her.

"Closure? She does this every single night, even when she's not drunk and every time she gets the same response… nothing.. she gets nothing… how much closure do you need?.. she doesn’t love her anymore she needs to move on for her sake"

You look at your right hand, the ring reminding you of what you did, of how you ruined your happiness out of fear; Kai and you started talking again after he came to one of your shows, you knew he still loved you, and you and Lisa were having some problems, he was there at first, you thought, as a friend Lisa didn’t think so, she knew he wanted more and even though you going out with him as “friends” was causing unnecessary fights between you and her, you still did it because he was there and he made you feel wanted.

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The day after tomorrow you go to a bar, the one you know she always goes to on Friday nights, you go in and sit in the same spot every time, in the darkest corner of the club, to watch her perform her poetry. Today though,  what makes you come is phone call you received yesterday morning:

“Hey Jen, it’s Lisa,  umm… I made a full of myself as usual, but umm… I saw a picture of you and Kai today, you looked happy…” her voice breaks, and it hurts “anyways.. I’m sorry about last night, it won’t happen again, I mean it this time…”  something’s off, she sounds different but you don’t why or what is it that you hear in her voice, you don’t dwell on it, but is the biggest reason why you’re here tonight.

After sitting there for a while you hear the crowd start to clap and you feel proud because most of this people is here for her, the bar is never this full when she's not performing, and is only after you're sitting there watching her for a moment that you realize she  not only sounds different but she looks different, or rather there's something different about her, but you don't know what is it until she starts talking…

"Hi everybody I know you're hoping to hear some poetry but if you don't mind this time I want to do something different, something for myself, you see I literally just had one of those life changing moments this morning, made me realize what I was doing with my life and I want to sing this time because, this is the song I heard before realizing what my next step should be so I hope you enjoy it… “

It's not until you're hearing the first verse of the song that you realize what that look in her eyes means…

Am I better off dead
Am I better off a quitter
They say I'm better off now
Than I ever was with her

Its finality , she's moving on, she's letting you go, and you panic, you start to panic because you realize you don't want her to move on, you want her to keep trying, but you do nothing , you do nothing then, and you do nothing the next couple of days, weeks, months…

Oh I wanted words but all I heard was nothing
Oh I got nothing
I got nothing
I got nothing

She's letting you go because you were… are too scared to hold on… so you do nothing, and you watch her go.