TAEHYUNG'S POV

"Hey Taetae, are you not awake yet?" Jimin asked, peeking his head into my room. I remained still as I ignore his question, not even bothering to look up at him nor give him any sign that I heard him. I was drowning myself in thoughts of what could possible happen today that I am not in the mood to talk with anyone. Jimin would know this, heck he knows me more than myself that I find it scary most of the time. I know that he won't bother with any more questions and would actually let me be. As if he read my mind, I heard him sigh as before he closes my door but just as I thought I'm left alone again, 

"You know you can't blame yourself forever Tae. What's done is done. The pain was caused and there ain't nothing we can do to turn back the time no matter how much we want it. It's hard, I know, but you can't be miserable all your life. You can't stay like this forever. You have to move on." he said in a low voice. He sighed once more and as I heard the door close, I finally let go of the tears. I know he's right. Everything's done already and I won't be able to change things no matter how hard I try. Yet I can't help but feel hurt and be empty. I lied still in my bed for a few more minutes before I completely pulled myself together and went out of my room. Then there I saw my members, all busy with their own stuff, preparing themselves for our flight. We are flying to Japan this afternoon to attend an award show and we are riding together with other idol groups. 

I started to prepare myself and my things and hours went by without me knowing it for I am still drowned with my thoughts filled with sadness and anxiety. Even with my heart pounding so hard against my chest, I remained passive all the time. It's as if I'm not present even though I am. And while the members were all having fun as they are all excited to receive yet another great award, I kept on dozing off their conversations. I can't focus. My thoughts are always filled with questions. What could possibly happen when I see her tonight? How would I feel? How would I react? Will I be able to control myself when I see her? What would happen if I were to run to her and hug her tight to let her know how much I missed her? Would she hug me back? Would she let go of all the pain I've caused her then? Will she forgive me? Hell, who am I kidding? I need to snap out of these useless thoughts. As I did, I joined the conversations and actually allowed myself to forget about her for just as long as I can. On our way to the airport, we talked about stuff that we can do after the awards night as well as the places we can visit while we're at Japan. We planned on having a very nice tour around the place, to take our time to enjoy and relax and to actually treat ourselves for doing well this year. 

While in our van, Jimin kept on joking around with me even though I always back, triple the intensity of sarcasm he uses on me. I let out a chuckle every now and then and satisfaction would be evident on his face. 

"Okay boys, we're now near the airport so I'd just remind you that you'd be flying with other idol groups." Our manager called out from the driver seat. 

"Who are these groups, hyung? I already heard of iKON and EXO, are there any more groups?" Yoongi hyung asked. 

"Yes iKON and EXO will be there as well as KARD and the female rappers, Jessi and Heize. I'm just informing you now so you won't be surprised." The members mumbled their comments then proceeded with their own conversations. We don't mind riding with the other groups, it's actually more fun being around with new people. Making friends is just as fun as making music for us. 

A few minutes passed and we finally arrived, welcomed by a swarm of photographers. Namjoon hyung was the one to get off the vehicle as I am the last one. Just as I was about to hop off the car, manag