A/N: I apologize for taking so long to update. I thought that, after moving to university, I'd have more time for myself but I was very wrong. I struggled with my academics and failed to do well in my first quarter despite trying to focus on that. I'm afraid that, until I perform acceptably in school, I can't allow myself time to write except for during breaks. I'm trying to do better in this upcoming quarter and I hope that those of you who wait for my updates won't have to stay idle for another 3 months. Thank you for your patience and I hope everyone has a happy New Year!

____

{8}

“Are you leaving already? You don’t want to take a longer break?” Minju wondered and Jessica shook her head.

“Seven days is long enough for me, don’t worry about it,” the wedding planner insisted but I was still tense. Spending time with Jessica was nice; I missed having her around and talking with her in person and in depth like we had over the past week. She also made a great link between me and Taeyeon when I felt too awkward to make the first move.

“Sica is basically a machine, she doesn’t need rest,” Taeyeon teased, feeding Stan a spoonful of rice. For some reason – though it’d only been a few days – he seemed bigger. And rounder. It may have made him cuter.

“Machines overheat too, you know,” Minju bumped Taeyeon’s shoulder. The doctor grinned and I looked at her son instead. “I’ll be back soon, okay?”

“Be safe, Babe,” Taeyeon replied, kissing her hand and we waved as the woman walked out.

“Where’s she going again?”

“A cousin’s party, close enough for her to drive but too far for us to take Stan so I said I’d stay,” Taeyeon explained and glanced at the blonde. “Minju is worried about you.”

“I won’t work on weekends, so it’ll be better than before, really,” Jessica insisted and we finished up our dinner, leaning back in our seats.  Seunghyun let out a sigh.

“Taeng, let’s bring out some wine,” he encouraged but Taeyeon shrugged before helping Stan out of his seat.

“After we put the baby to bed, and he doesn’t sleep until 9,” she added and the banker frowned. “Come on, I don’t want him to think that it’s okay for everyone to drink wine.”

“It’s not like he can lift the dang bottle,” Seunghyun mumbled but Taeyeon ignored him and followed Stan as he walked over to the couch. My eyes followed as he laid out his piano and tapped out some notes.

“Oh man, I’m gonna miss this little kid when I go back.” Jessica stood and sat beside him. He glanced at her but returned to the keys. I snorted and Seunghyun laughed. “Really? I’m leaving and that’s all you got?”

“Come visit again soon, before he forgets you,” Taeyeon suggested with a chuckle, his hair.

“Does it even matter? If I’m not his mom, he doesn’t spare much of a glance,” Jessica pouted and poked his cheek. The baby blinked extra hard that time and glared a little. “What?”

“He’s getting a little tired, I think it’s time to get him ready for bed,” Taeyeon sighed and scooped up Stan. He wrapped his arms around her neck and stared blankly as his mother walked them to the bathroom. They’re so cute.

“And she said 9.”

“Hey, I don’t control his emotions!” Taeyeon barked and disappeared behind the bathroom door. We were left in chuckles.

“Why do you always have to piss her off?” Jessica nudged Seunghyun and he shrugged.

“If we don’t pick on her from time to time how else is she going to destress?” he scoffed and I frowned.

“Isn’t that why Taeyeon always went to the gym when we were in school?” I asked and Seunghyun laughed until he realized neither of us were laughing with him. He seemed confused. So was I.

“Are you serious? You think exercising was her only way of relieving stress?” he smirked and I found him obnoxious all over again. How much of Taeyeon does he know that I don’t?

“So you a lot to make her feel better?” he shook his head. He opened his mouth but Taeyeon walked back through, patting Stan’s as he snored into her neck.

“Seung, can you put him to bed while I clean up the bathroom really quick?” Taeyeon asked and he jumped up, opening his arms.

“Leave Stan to me, go ahead and clean up,” he smiled as she gently transferred the child into his arms and they separated for their separate tasks. I looked at Jessica and she shrugged.

“He’ll tell us when he gets back.”

“Don’t you think it’s weird when someone you used to know so well is suddenly someone you can’t recognize?” I muttered and she stared at me.

“Did you already drink some wine?” I scoffed and she laughed. My cheeks felt red. “I’m kidding, but it’s been a few years. Even I can’t look at you the same way.” I froze.

“You think I’m different?” I asked and Jessica shrugged once more. If there was anything I could count on Jess for, it was her honesty. I’d been around so many fake people, so many fake stories and relationships, Jessica stood out to me when I decided to come back home.

“I think you’ve changed, there’s a distinction between being different and changing. I can see a reason that it happened,” she replied and glanced behind her shoulder, making sure no one was back. I hummed a bit. “But I like it. You used to be spoiled.”

“Excuse me? Spoiled?” I repeated and she grinned a bit.

“A certain someone spoiled you before you could even grow up, it’s not your fault,” she said and I had to agree. Taeyeon pampered me for so many years and we were so young. She did a lot for me. “You’re more mature now, a little more grounded.” I still felt young and irrational. I may have changed but not by much, if what I felt was any indication. If Jessica knew the extent of my insecurities, the past depression I had, would she still think I was mature?

“Do you guys want red or white?” we looked up as Taeyeon dusted off her hands and walked into the kitchen. Does Taeyeon think we’re all the same? Does she feel different?

“Do you have any sweet red?” Jessica asked and the doctor hummed, pulling out a little wine rack. She’s such an adult now. I remembered that one of her dreams was to have a little wine selection, something that made her feel like an adult. It was such a cute dream but it came true.

“Is Merlot okay?”

“I’m good with that,” Seunghyun popped up, carefully closing Stan’s door. The stepped over, Taeyeon with the bottle and a handful of glasses, and we all leaned back. Sweet but not too much, no wonder the bottle has already been sued, she must love this.

“Did Xiumin tell you guys yet? He got offered a position as a cardiologist in our neighboring district,” Taeyeon told Seunghyun and the latter widened his eyes.

“What?! Wouldn’t that be closer to here than wear he lives now?” Seunghyun asked and Taeyeon hummed. Taeyeon used to be much closer with Xiumin than Seunghyun…

“What’s he gonna do?” I ended up asking but no one flinched.

“He doesn’t have enough money to rent out another place so he’s gonna commute for a while and save up. Shouldn’t be too hard with a cardiologist’s starting salary,” Taeyeon replied, sipping her wine.

“I am curious about that number,” Jessica said and Seunghyun nodded. The doctor hummed.

“With his grades, ranking, and performance in residency, I’d say Xiumin is top class. Not to mention the area and the economy are both factors to up the pay, they’re bound to be offering him at least $230,000.” I almost spit out my wine.

“Holy , what’s yours?” Seunghyun stared.

“I’ve been on a little more than $200.” That was a high annual salary, not to mention they were at the start of their careers.

“Damn, that’s pretty good.”

“I mean, it’s not super star worthy.” I felt eyes on me and laughed. Yeah, I probably have the biggest difference between the start and end of my career.

“Yeah, it’s not retire in your early 30’s worthy.”

“Hey, I still make money, don’t make me out to be lazy,” I grinned, sipping more wine.

“Your group was really popular though, wasn’t it? You guys made your way over here quite a few times.” I took a deep breath and remembered the flashing lights and the adrenaline. The memories were still so vivid. Sometimes I miss it more than usual.

“Yeah, the girls are still doing really well back in Korea too,” I added.

“Do you think anyone from high school even thought about us being successful?” Taeyeon wondered and I looked at her. She used to have so many dark thoughts, thoughts like she wouldn’t make it or would get trampled by competition. If there was one naysayer, it’d be you.

“Well let me tell you, the people that were voted to be Most Successful in our class probably can’t stand on our level,” Seunghyun clicked his tongue and I snorted. The percussionists were always rowdy and charming, but back then, no one would’ve guessed they’d all be excelling in their own ways. “I can’t wait for that reunion.”

“What?” I muttered and Jessica nudged me.

“The 15 year reunion, it’s coming up in September.” I blinked and stared.

“Has it been 15 years?”

“Dude, you really , you can’t even remember the year we graduated high school?” Seunghyun asked and it suddenly hit me: I never graduated with them.

“Guys…Tiffany left for Korea before she could finish high school…” Taeyeon said softly and the other two suddenly hummed, remembering.

“Oh , you’re right! I remember you guys video chatted!” Seunghyun groaned. It was a blurry view of the performance hall but I remembered the screams and the robes and the caps being inside of a phone. I was so proud, but at the time, it made me feel so lonely.

“You should’ve seen how Jonghyun dressed up, Wooyoung was weirder but since he’s in the air force now it’s not weird to see him in a suit. I probably still have pictures.” Taeyeon stood and slipped into her bedroom, coming back out with her laptop open.

“Oh no! I hated how I looked in high school!” Seunghyun groaned as Taeyeon continued to peruse her pictures.

“Yeah, I definitely didn’t work out back then,” Jessica winced.

“Hey, we were all a little chubbier and a little less stylish but this ’s fun to look at,” Taeyeon grinned and I laughed. A part of me missed high school. Everything was so easy; my worries were so trivial. A part of me just wanted to remember a time where I could touch and kiss Taeyeon freely and feel stupid butterflies in my chest. “Here!” There were six of them in their little drummer group. It was a little weird to think how – out of all friendships – theirs never faltered.

“You’re the only group I know that never dropped anyone or still hangs out,” Jessica mentioned and I hummed.

“I mean, it’s hard to give up on friends that you spent so much time together with. We did lots of competitions and field trips, not to mention all the practices and concerts and late-night hangs,” Seunghyun whistled, rubbing his eyes from the memories.

“Yeah, if I wasn’t with Tiffany, I was with you guys,” Taeyeon agreed. I didn’t know too much about the extent of their relationship. I was so focused on my relationship with Taeyeon, I didn’t look at a lot of her other friends. But now he knows so much more about you, why didn’t I integrate myself more into your life? She clicked the arrow and a picture of her and Xiumin popped up.

“Ah! It’s Pony Boy!”

“Xiumin still has chubby cheeks, especially when he smiles.”

“Oh my God, he hates it when his girlfriend says that.” Huh? “No way, he didn’t tell you?”

“What the ?! No! Okay, now I’m spamming this with 20 texts!” Seunghyun whipped out his phone and furiously typed. “Since when has he been dating?”

“Since the beginning of the year, he told me a while ago when we had lunch together.” Was it that day I was left alone with Minju? “Her name’s Kim, she’s really cute, and I think he said she was a couple years older but she definitely looks younger.”

“Dammit, Pony Boy, I want pictures and details!” Seunghyun snarled and finally set down his device. “Do you have a picture?”

“Um, maybe I can search for her.”

“He’s been whining about being single his entire life, it’s good that he has a girlfriend now,” Jessica mentioned.

“Yeah, he’s really into her. They’re pretty serious, they’ve met each other’s families already and everything.”

“What? Sounds like at this rate he’s gonna get married before you do,” Seunghyun said and Taeyeon sighed.

“Man, I don’t even want to talk about marriage right now.” I shuddered and glanced in her direction. But aren’t you ready to get married? Jessica seemed a little shocked but I saw Seunghyun with his lips parted, unable to hide as the doctor poured herself another glass of wine. Taeyeon, are you okay?

“You’re right, we should give Minju more time to run away.” And just like that, the gloom in her face lifted and Taeyeon let out a chuckle, dissolving the tension. I blinked.

“Man, you guys don’t miss a chance to rip me, do you?” the banker smiled and his eyes glanced at me and Jessica.

“No, we don’t.” How else will Taeyeon destress?