A/N: I’m back~ (I would’ve updated sooner if it weren't for Silly-ah :P ). No author hunting please lol.

Thank you for staying loyal to this fic even though this author of yours at updating. Do you even remember subscribing? lol. I wuv you all~

Please excuse my lackluster writing here in comparison to the previous chapters. I’ve been brain farting throughout the whole thing. I also wholeheartedly appreciate all the ridiculously good comments you give me guys. It really encourages me to do better even though my skills definitely need improvement.

Also, I would really appreciate it if you guys gave some constructive criticism. For instance, notice something that needs improvement? Go ahead and include it in your comment! :D Just don’t write anything insulting. Thats just out of place lol.

The Color of Our Memories:

Chapter 13 (Part 2) - And the Clock’s Hands go... Boom?

The tired nine stood from their seats and bowed in thankfulness, not milliseconds later their maknae speaking words of gratuity into a hand mic, the tone in her smooth voice emanating with humbleness. And with that, to the fans' disappointment, the fansign came to a conclusion, leaving a small window of opportunity for simple admiration to be practiced. As if washed over by some spell, the nine women had become the only presence that withheld value in the crowd’s field of vision. Magnetizing. That was the full extent of their presence. The sight was a film that didn’t need any plot or any mind boggling computerized effects. The simplicity in watching, in savouring their presence was already a fulfilling activity in itself. Looking on—to them, to the fans—was a film worth watching over and over again.

With the next set of events in mind, the nine calmly waited for the signal to depart, providing the perfect opportunity for the crowd to merely look on. Some waved colorfully decorated paper signs and many held up cameras and phones, ready to capture this otherwise pointless moment for memory’s sake.

Latched onto one another, the Shikshin and choding duo calmly paced themselves to the front of the line, eager to rush off to the vehicles that awaited them. A convincingly composed Hyoyeon tried her best not to let the welling in her eyes loosen and cause a crack in her mask. The very glaze that coated her orbs however, proved her efforts to maintain a blank face meaningless to the other seven. There was something wrong. They all knew and it wasn’t hard to tell, but taking the solemnity that the two portrayed as a hint, they collectively knew that away from the cameras was the perfect time to pester the two with their gossip baiting inquiries.

As soon as they were all allowed to descend down the small flight of stairs and into the vans perched in the mall parking lot, the two strode past the seven slow moving girls. Every inch of their focus was solely reserved for getting home quickly.

Sunny looked on at the dancer and Shikshin, her expression unchanging but her interest in the two piquing. If not for her attention being so captivated by the two, she could have clearly heard the bells sounding in her head, the clear and vibrant ringing in tune with the perking of her ears.

Her chocolate brown orbs danced around the length of the table until she laid her sights on a few sheets of paper. Throughout the whole fansign Sunny had noticed how the two girls had been consistently writing things down and by that action alone she knew. The sloppiness in the two’s movements however was something Sunny did not anticipate. They were usually very careful about leaving behind the papers they had written their conversations on.

Sunny sighed. She picked up the rolled up sheets of paper, familiar penmanship greeting her eyes. As she followed the rest down the steps, she tucked the sheets under her arm and waved warmly at the crowd of fans before disappearing behind black curtains.

Shielded from public eye Sunny lifted the rolled up papers, stretched it out vertically with her hands and skimmed through the scattered sentences around the creased surface. Unconsciously pursing her lips, she nodded to herself.

She was right. The aegyo queen was right all along and now she knew...

Sooyoung was a liar. She knew all along.

Hyoyeon was lovesick.

And Jessica was running away.

But even though she had all the questions to her answers before her, the one thing that Sunny didn’t have the least bit clue on was…

“What do I do now…”

“Hey, are you two alright? Yah, Choi Sooyoung!”

Sunny turned her head quickly to the source of the outburst—Yuri—only to see the girl combing her hair back and crossing her her arms over her chest worriedly, shaking her head in disapproval. Sunny slowly gravitated towards the forming circle behind the curtains of the stage set up, joining her group members.

“Are they... alright? Hyoyeon didn’t seem fine. What happened?” Taeyeon asked as she stretched her arms in a carefree fashion, appearing as if she had the least bit of attention span to spare with the little happening but yet strangely at the same time, completely all knowing and every bit as concerned as they all were. Calm.

Sunny’s lips pursed, the slight trembling of her bottom lip that had started without her knowing effectively being put to a still.

Sunny knew what was wrong with Hyoyeon, or in other words, she had a very convincing lead. Everyone was completely confused as to what was happening in their own group. Sunny knew. Doesn’t everyone else have the right to know as well?

Why yes.

“Hyo—”

And no.

“What was that Sunny?”

Sunny immediately tried to cover , only to fumble and settle for nervously drumming the tips of her fingers on her bottom lip once the kid leader directed her gaze towards her. The.corner of her lips dragged down to feign cluelessness which only helped in unveiling how nervous she had suddenly become.

“Its nothing. I was just clearing my throat.”

“No you were saying something about Hyoyeon-ah. Hyoyeon-ah...?” Tiffany asked with a raised eyebrow in an attempt to try and get Sunny to finish her sentence.

Sunny felt herself slowly giving into the pressures of having the attention of so many curious people. “Hyoyeon has... she has...  for Sica, she lo—”

And speaking of Jessica? There the lone ice princess was, standing cross armed at a corner as she mindlessly stared at the black curtains, the very swiveling of her heels whilst she shifted her weight at the mention of her name reeling in Sunny’s attention. Jessica wasn’t gathered with the others, wasn’t directing her attention towards the ruckus or to Sunny particularly, but her gaze, oh how her gaze on those curtains  firmed with such curiosity driven concentration. To hear, all one needed were ears no? And to listen, all one needed was undivided concentration.

Sunny gulped.

“Lo?” Tiffany cocked her head to the side in confusion. With an eyebrows raised, she shifted her weight to her left foot, causing her to brush arms with the kid leader beside her. The brief skin contact jolted her to switch to the other foot, shuffling covertly closer to Yoona. A bitter smile drew upon Taeyeon’s lips, the girl not daring to even look at Tiffany.

Sunny shook her head, her flared up nostrils twitching which provided a strange contrast to the cool slate of an expression she wore.

“U-Umm... love?” Yoona asked cautiously, her voice descending to barely above a whisper and her head ducking as she leaned in towards the center of the circle.

“Hyoyeon loves Sica?!” Yuri exclaimed in surprise, her eyes widening. She took a step forward, easily towering over Sunny in her state of ignited curiosity.

“No... that, that isn’t what I-” Sunny leaned back by instinct and glanced at Jessica. The girl stared at the tile patterned floor, completely expressionless as she drew all her energy into gripping the portion of curtain she had in her hand as tightly as she could. “What I... What I mean is—”

“Girls, come on we have to get going. Dance practice.”

Not a single person moved, not a single shoe shuffled. Hyoyeon loves Jessica? Well then, dance practice could wait at least a few seconds.

“Pffft, lets go kids.” The kid leader was the first to speak up. She laughed her signature ahjumma laugh and followed their impatient manager towards the parking lot. With a loud cackle and a head latching back in delight, she spoke the single sentence that was partially enough to dispel the ridiculous possibility of the two former roommates being in love..

“Thats funny. Next you’ll be saying that Sooyoung’s going on a diet.”

**************

“Who broke Jessica?” Sooyoung yelled across the room, earning an angry pout from the ice princess and a few scattered chuckles across the room. Jessica hadn’t taken a break and continued practicing. Surprising.

Not minding the sudden attention and the playful teasing occurring to the side of the room, Jessica went on to practice once more and waited for Tiffany to start the music. It had hardly been seconds since their  dance practice ended and their instructor had left.

The song was only a few seconds in and Jessica and Tiffany already displayed difficulty with the first few couple of steps. Jessica’s arms awkwardly switched from pose to pose and her feet stumbled rigidly between steps she wasn’t sure of.

A disgruntled Tiffany stopped the music and Jessica gratefully sighed. Perhaps paying a bit more attention to the teacher’s critiques would have helped instead of staring holes into the back of Hyoyeon’s blonde head.

Jessica sighed once more. Hyoyeon.

It was just her luck. Just when the bridges between them had weathered into their most fragile state, when even the most mundane had evolved into such a chore, she needed the dancer’s help.

All she needed to do was poke the girl on the arm and the blonde would immediately understand what she needed but not now. Not when there were so many words that were needed to be said but were so hard to say… words that time taunted the two into never saying.

So Jessica just shrugged off the nagging uneasiness that the current circumstances had upon her and dove blindly into what she deemed to be mission impossible. Doing what she did best she strutted off towards the blonde, her naturally chic blank face doing its job.

She just had to wait. Just utter those three words and maybe everything would magically be okay and normal and settled; just fine, like before. Wait, until the time was ripe, until she could gather the courage to talk to Hyoyeon without either of them running away and only then, would she finally and willingly, free herself from the dancing queen. All of these pestering emotions would vanish and all would be as it was. Would that time ever approach?

Sitting cross legged on top of a fold out table, the hair on Hyoyeon’s skin stood to attention, her ears twitching. She stopped reading the script in her lap and blankly stared at the printed words, her mind too frenzied to even focus on memorizing lines. Hyoyeon listened closely to those familiar footsteps become louder and louder, her body freezing over as if it would help her blend into the plastic table she sat on.

Only two words echoed within the dancer’s mind, “Please no.”

She bit down on her bottom lip and begged that Jessica was just walking past her. As the seconds passed however and a pair of black sneakers entered her view, Hyoyeon cursed herself.

Hyoyeon lifted her eyes up after nearly threatening herself with a kick to the gut and instantly felt all traces of condensation within the inner walls of , vanish.

She glanced up at Jessica quickly and bull’s eye—direct eye contact. The dancer quickly averted her gaze and stared wide eyed at the script in her lap, a very unneeded recollection sparked by the unintended eye contact.

“...do you love Sica?”
“I do.”

Hyoyeon’s breath hitched, her lungs constricting and very slowly then caving around her heart, nearly swallowing it whole. It was as if the realization had just freshly dawned upon her, without the tears just the iron pan in the face  The remnants of that ‘small’ talk with Sooyoung left Hyoyeon absolutely dazed, wandering without a clue into a world where she in fact, loved the ice princess.

It hadn’t even been a day since her realization and she to deal with this? Ridiculous.

Maintaining composure Hyoyeon managed a shaky response, her voice cracking once she opened .

“What…”

“Help me.” Jessica stated bluntly, her hands forming balls in an effort to try and keep her facade solid.

“I’m... I’m kind of busy right now. Ask Yuri to help you.” Hyoyeon drew her attention back to the sheets of paper on her lap and pretended to read her script, waiting to breathe once Jessica left.

“Does it look like Yuri wants to practice anymore?” Jessica spat out harsher than she intended, crossing her arms over her chest. Lately everything came out harsher than she meant for it, but only when it came to Hyoyeon.

Sweat began to coat the skin of Hyoyeon’s paling fingertips, the feel of the smooth bundle of papers in her hand becoming sticky and damp. She grit her teeth.

“Hyo... Hyoyeon-ah,” Tiffany called out hesitantly from the middle of the room as she approached Hyoyeon with small, timid steps. “Help me for a bit?”

Hyoyeon shifted her focus from Jessica to Tiffany and just by looking into the Tiffany’s eyes, she instantly felt her body loosen.

Witnessing a steamy lip locking session between the mushroom and kid leader in the dorm living room helped plenty in creating uneasy talks between Hyoyeon and Tiffany. Every time the dancer would approach Tiffany, her mind would replay how the girl’s lips smothered the kid leader’s in a needy kiss and that alone rendered her ability to converse useless.

But compared to speaking with Jessica? Talking to Tiffany was as easy as breathing. provided that Hyoyeon held no feelings for the girl. In a situation such as this, Hyoyeon was profoundly grateful that Tiffany asked for her help. Grateful to have someone pull her away from having to stay sitting on a fold-out table, forcing a conversation with a seemingly angry ice princess.

Carelessly tossing her script to the side and onto the plastic surface of the table, Hyoyeon jumped off of her seat on the table. She gave no second thought to following Tiffany towards the center of the room.

But what was that churning in her gut? It oddly reminded Hyoyeon of guilt.

Guilt. Weird.

She stopped in her tracks.

Did she just do that to Jessica? She just did that to Jessica.

A kick to the face is what Hyoyeon felt she deserved, but what could she do now. Turning back to even look at Jessica already proved to be taxing, what more in a painfully awkward situation such as this? Every moment between them was laced with uneasy silences and forced eye contact that lasted half a millisecond. It was as if they had become total strangers.

She couldn’t just simply ask Jessica to join her could she? That was like admitting she did something wrong and Hyoyeon knew so well how she was so skilled at that.

“We’re heading back to the dorms. You guys coming…?” Sunny called out from the doorway, eyeing Jessica and Hyoyeon particularly, mimicking Tiffany’s action.

Jessica glanced at Hyoyeon, the restrained furrowing of her eyebrows voicing the hurt Hyoyeon inflicted. She silently followed Yuri and the rest out the door, her wilting shoulders held up and her chin still poised upwards, poking into the cool, conditioned air. With her back turned to Hyoyeon, the pained expression she hid proved too much and melted the stronghold that was her naturally stoic features.

Ignoring and being ignored. Speaking and then suddenly deciding not to speak. Looking and appearing to be looking. All of these had become typical between the two and it was a regretful thing—a very sad situation indeed. What held their velvet strings tightly bound together, the strong bond nurtured over time, became much too selfish and grew and grew and grew… into something far too complex, far past the state of return. It was tearing down yet at the same time building.

And this—the noise— was the product of that selfish growth.

Tiffany turned her head to look at Hyoyeon worriedly and responded with hesitancy, “We’ll follow behind you in a few.”

“Ooookay….” Sunny replied before closing the door behind her as she made her way out of the room.

As the door closed with a soft click, Tiffany turned to look at the guilty dancer as she dragged her feet from their spot and towards the iPod dock. The silence that overcame Hyoyeon made it strikingly obvious to Tiffany, that the hurt that seemed to radiate from Jessica’s back view as she made her way towards the door was not invisible to Hyoyeon. The few measly seconds of looking ate away at Hyoyeon’s conscience. The guilt very gradually gnawed at her, threatening not to leave until she emptied out those bothersome, prickling feelings in a bout of sincere apologies.

But what could Tiffany say to put Hyoyeon’s mind at ease? Hyoyeon was clearly annoyed with something, that something most likely having to deal with the scene she just witnessed. Practice couldn’t simply be productive without having to think about things other than that.

Letting out a dragged out sigh, Hyoyeon squatted in front of the speakers and with a single finger, searched through the songs on the rectangular electronic device, the memory of Jessica walking out looping endlessly.

“So, which part did you need help with?” Hyoyeon asked with a hint of irritation in her tone, which a confused Tiffany gladly misread.

Tiffany followed Hyoyeon across the room with her eyes, a dash of paranoia coating her vision. “Uhh, i-its okay. I’ll just ask Yuri if you don’—“

An abrupt breath of air broke through Hyoyeon’s sealed lips, “It’s not you Fany-ah… Sorry, let’s just practice alright? Sorry.”

The soles of Tiffany’s sneakers remained flatly stuck to the wooden boards of the flooring, running the risk of becoming embedded into the earth the longer she stood in place.

She worriedly watched Hyoyeon stretch out her limbs, swinging her arms from side to side. The more Tiffany observed the greater the throbbing paranoia welled up from the pits of her gut to the highest domains of her mind.

Tiffany was afraid.

No words about that night had been brought up or even uttered. Not a single confrontation or shaky, careful inquiry about her long held secret came from the maknae or dancer. Surprisingly even the rest of the members treated them like normal and from this, it was safe to say that no one else knew. Although Seohyun and Hyoyeon kept interactions to a minimum, they were at least conversing with them.

How terrifying.

Hiding was scary, but there was a strange comfort, a fake security, in being hidden, in drowning one’s senses in something as real yet at the same time, as fantasy driven and disillusioned as love.

But like this? Tiffany could see the gun in front of her face, the trigger deliciously close to being pulled, waiting for the moment where she would be screaming her secret for the world’s ears.

Tiffany took a moment and paused, recollecting herself.

Just breathe, she told herself. Not everything was about Tiffany.

The mushroom stared blankly at Hyoyeon, taking note of how she seemed to mumbling to herself like how a mother scolds a child.

And then the music started.

And almost simultaneously it stopped.

“Why did you do that for?” Hyoyeon asked, clearly confused as to whether they were actually going to practice or not.

“You sure you’re okay?” Tiffany asked, her eyebrows furrowing.

Hyoyeon nodded as she stared at Tiffany softly. “Yeah.”

“You don’t particularly sound fine, and what was that about?”

“What was what about?”

“Jesshika. She could have just joined us.”

Hyoyeon merely stared at Tiffany and exhaled. The seconds passed with the two plainly staring at each other without speaking one word, the hands of the clock in the room accompanying the then apparent sound of the air conditioner operating.

The choding’s lips formed a thin line as she turned to face her reflection. “So… I see you kind of at the intr—”

“You know… you and Sica haven’t been on the best terms lately.”

Tiffany let a big breath of air out and walked towards Hyoyeon, standing beside her with their elbows barely touching. She stared at her and Hyoyeon’s reflection, looking for just the right time to speak even if the solid block of silence that hung in the air made it painfully hard to cut any words in.

Noticing how Tiffany’s gaze seemed to be directed at her, Hyoyeon smiled and chuckled.

The mushroom’s eyelids flickered as she returned the smile and placed a reassuring hand on Hyoyeon’s shoulder.

There was a certain characteristic about the way Hyoyeon’s lips curved to form a smile or how her naturally husky voice formed a hearty chuckle. Where was it?

She paused.

Tiffany realized something.

She retracted her hand that laid casually on Hyoyeon’s shoulder, the glint in her eyes burning out as she stared at Hyoyeon with each passing second. The smile on her face faded, the corner of lips dragging down to give the dancer a weak smile, almost mimicking Hyoyeon’s very own expression.

They were the same.

They were both exhausted. All nine of them were, but her and Hyoyeon’s fatigue was of a different matter. And in that instance of just staring, Tiffany almost forgot about herself and whatever worries she had about Hyoyeon and Taeyeon, and all of these secrets she had carefully hidden.

Well, almost.

“You’re smiling.” Tiffany said as her lungs began to hold the air she had quickly inhaled, in confinement, “Smiling with me… and it—“

Hyoyeon stood to attention, the alarming loss of the luster that was once in Tiffany’s smile forcing her to straighten her back without knowing.

“It sounds so forced.”

Tiffany chuckled to herself, her breath that came out in tiny bits between words heaving out of with the sound.

Lifting her head up slowly, she looked up at Hyoyeon sternly. “Its me isn’t it? You don’t even want to be in the same room as me.”

Not bothering to wait for a response from the dumbfounded dancer, she trudged across the room, her feet thudding against the hardwood floor. She grabbed her bag, slinging the nylon straps over her shoulder and blew an abrupt breath of air through her nostrils. Huffing towards the iPod dock with the rectangular control device in hand, Tiffany turned the stereo system off and stood up, her gaze fixated on the grey doors that led out of the practice room.

“Noooo—”

“Then what is it?” Tiffany turned around swiftly, her sneakers squeaking against the polished floor. A breathy chuckle blew out from her lips, her facial expression remaining stagnant. “I’m sorry you had to find out about us like—“

“It’s not that!” Hyoyeon exhaled, clearly worn out with Tiffany continuously blaming herself for no reason. Repeating herself over and over again was such a tiresome task. “It’s not you…”

“Then, what is it? If it's not me, then this has to be about Sica. it has to be.”

Hyoyeon gulped, the action pushing Tiffany’s paranoia back its place where it could be recalled in the most unneeded and out of place times.

“Why are you so hung up about whatever is happening between me and Sica?” Hyoyeon quietly muttered under her breath.

“And why shouldn’t I? I care about you, we all care about you. How can we just shrug it off our shoulders?” Tiffany sighed.

The mushroom approached Hyoyeon with slow steps, a water bottle in hand and her bag slung over her shoulder. With an eyebrow rising, she finally asked the question that practically their whole group had been itching to ask.

“You and Jesshika…“ her fingers darted all around Hyoyeon as she searched for the right word, “I wouldn’t have thought of this possibility if Sunny didn’t bring it up, but thinking about it now, it totally makes sense. Everything that’s been weird about you two makes so much sense I’m speechless. You two…” Don’t grin, Tiffany thought to herself, but it was useless. Those crescent moons were up again, “Jess and you, You and Jess—Oh my god. It makes so much sense.”

Tiffany laughed and soon enough she found the floor coming closer to view, her wobbly legs unable to support her weight anymore.

Hyoyeon’s eyes widened. Sooyoung knew. Only Sooyoung. What nonsense was Tiffany bringing up now? If Sunny didn’t tell Tiffany what? Sooyoung told didn’t she? Hyoyeon told her not to tell anyone and she trusted that Sooyoung kept her promise, but with Tiffany cracking up like an idiot on the dance floor, Hyoyeon found it hard to keep faith in the shikshin. Now she couldn’t do anything but let her blood simmer.

Explaining was the same as making excuses, so without a word the dancing queen walked calmly towards her things, grabbed them quickly and then after swept  her script off the table along the way.

“Let’s go home.”

“You shouldn’t keep secrets Hyoyeon-ah!” Tiffany yells across the room, a smile clearly resonating in her now cheery voice.

Hyoyeon stopped in her tracks. Secrets? What business did Tiffany have telling her not to keep secrets?

“Like you and Taeyeon-ah right? Right?” Hyoyeon spat out. The irritation that was just a few moments ago meant for herself spanning it’s branches to involve the mushroom, and Shikshin as well, now accompanied by a new companion: betrayal. The more the merrier.

And with that, Hyoyeon opened the door and walked out of the room, leaving her words to hang in the air for Tiffany to pick apart and dwell on.

With a final click on the door, Tiffany heaved a sigh, her shoulders slumping. She smiled to herself sadly as she stared at the direction Hyoyeon left in.

Like you and Taeyeon-ah right?

“Like we were you mean.” Tiffany sadly whispered to herself in a sing song voice.

**************

“Seohyun-ah.”

Hyoyeon poked her head out from the bathroom, her hair freshly curled.

Seconds passed and Seohyun moved not a single muscle as she sat squarely in her seat. The girl stared firmly at the open book on her desk as she read from a paragraph with complete, undivided concentration.

The sight before Hyoyeon surprised her. It wasn’t that Seohyun was studying, that itself was a staple and nature at work, but the maknae hardly turned to even acknowledge her presence.

“Seohyun-ah.” Hyoyeon softly called out to the preoccupied girl, her grip on the golden doorknob of the bathroom door tightening. Patience was not Hyoyeon’s virtue, this proving especially true today, the day she had been so anxiously waiting for, preparing as best as she could for what would be her first date in months, if not years. There was no time to wait for anything else.

Opening the door fully and leaning onto the doorpost with arms crossed, she waited to see if Seohyun would do something; flip a page, cross her legs, heck even twitch her finger.

Nothing.

Something was amiss. The maknae had been noticeably ignoring Hyoyeon for much too long for her liking. It was either going to sleep too early, or walking rather far or ahead of her and even if their conversations appeared to be normal, Seohyun always seemed to be staring at the ground or the ceiling or a detail as insignificant as the buttons on Hyoyeon’s shirt.

The dancing queen stepped out of the bathroom in a tan leather pencil skirt and white see through halter top, and sighed. With a black clutch bag in hand, she began to make her way towards Seohyun, the golden bangles around her forearm sliding down to her wrist. She called to the younger again, “Seohyun-ah.”

Hyoyeon pursed her lips as she stared at Seohyun blankly, waiting to see if she would notice how she hovered above her with dwindling patience.

The clock was ticking, counting down to the moment where the dancer would shake the girl until she was senseless and then... Hyoyeon finally noticed. Headphones. Seohyun was wearing headphones.

“Aigo this kid...” Hyoyeon muttered under her breath. She yanked off the string unifying the two buds and after bending down, yelled into the maknae’s ear, “Seohyun-ah!”

The maknae jolted and ducked her head, immediately shielding her ears from Hyoyeon’s thunderous voice.

“Ah, unnie!” Seohyun whined.

“Yah, I was calling out to you like 50,000 times. My voice could have gone out.” Hyoyeon tugged at the hood of Seohyun’s white hoodie, “Tell me, do I look fine?”

Sitting up straight, Seohyun took the earbuds that now dangled from her lap and neatly bunched the white wire together, placing them on top of her open textbook. Turning her head, she stared at Hyoyeon plainly and without hesitation smiled softly. “You look beautiful unnie.”

“You sure you’re not lying?” Hyoyeon raised an eyebrow, a grin making it's way onto her face. Seohyun shook her head, a smile in place. “Thanks Seohyun-ah.”

“Is it...” Seohyun swiveled in her seat to face hyoyeon and looked up at her hesitantly, causing the older to raise her eyebrows in attention.

“Yes...?” Hyoyeon asked confusedly, dragging her words out to urge Seohyun to continue.

Their eyes met and at the simple contact, Seohyun’s gaze began to wander. Unconsciously she began to covertly steal glances at the rest of Hyoyeon’s appearance, a lot of the time spending prolonged amounts of time staring at the older girl’s see through top. Realizing this, her eyes snapped back to look at Hyoyeon in the eyes and then almost immediately darted to her lips, then her cheek, until they settled comfortably for staring at the dancer’s nose. “Today is that group date isn’t it?”

“Yup, it is.” Hyoyeon replied, nodding. She bent down to even out her stockings. “Remember?”

Seohyun smiled weakly. How could she forget. She had been dreading this day the moment she first obtained knowledge of it. As the days went by bits and pieces of her attention span went and being even near Hyoyeon felt heavier by the minute. Studying was proving to be difficult. She would read one paragraph or two and then suddenly she would remember that at 7pm on the 14th of February, Hyoyeon would be going out on a date. She would stare harder at the words and recite study material religiously in hopes of regaining her focus, but it proved to be tremendously difficult.

And whenever she would dwell on the possible reasons for her distressed state, she would blank out and sit or stand, stopping whatever she was doing, to just stare into space. She would start to think about why and how and where these thoughts and feelings started, and that was it. Nothing would get done and no answers would come to her. All she knew was that she... would not utter that word, that powerful, heart wrenching word, because it simply... wasn’t what she expected nor believed to be right.

And dealing with that itself—with having to deny herself and everything she thought to be true—was more painful than anything. Because how could Seohyun bear to love anyone if that love brought hate upon herself. Herself; that was Seohyun’s biggest obstacle. If only Seohyun could love herself.

“Alright!” Hyoyeon smiled to herself and straightened out her skirt, “I think I’m ready.”

“Good luck unnie.” Seohyun grinned to hide her displeasure, and fist pumped into the air, “Fighting! I’m sure Jinwoon will fall head over heels for you.”

Hyoyeon’s face contorted in disgust, “I don’t care about Jinwoon, I’m doing this for myself. A girl’s gotta get out once in a while.”

Seohyun smiled, a bit wider than she had all day, “I thought you liked him?”

Laughing, Hyoyeon replied, “Jinwoon’s a brat. I’m just babysitting, Seohyun.”

Nodding in response, Seohyun turned to organize the array of study material scattered on top of her desk. She had enough studying today. Any more studying would prove to be fruitless.

“I’m gonna get going now okay? See you later on.”

“Okay.” Seohyun looked up and smiled faintly at Hyoyeon. Noticing that one of the buttons on the older girl’s shirt had become ed, she reached out and held Hyoyeon’s hand lightly. “Wait. Unnie there’s a button that’s...” She quickly stood and did the loose buttons on Hyoyeon’s shirt. “There you go.”

“Thanks,” Hyoyeon chuckled and glanced at the clock on the wall, “Okay I really have to go—”

Seohyun hugged her.

Hugged her tighter than she had ever hugged the shorter girl, swaying from side to side as her cheek pushed up against Hyoyeon’s ear. She closed her eyes and relished in the warmth of the embrace, breathing in carefully to savour the flowery scent of Hyoyeon’s hair.

Hyoyeon eyes widened and she returned the hug hesitantly, confused. Every time she would try to speak Seohyun would just tighten the embrace. Placing a soft kiss on the older’s cheek, Seohyun whispered into Hyoyeon’s ear breathlessly, “Have fun okay?”

“I will! I will! Seohyun-ah, you’re crushing me! Yah!” Making a endless amount of exaggerated choking sounds, Hyoyeon wiggled out of the taller girl’s grasp and straightened out her clothes. She breathed in deeply. “Lately, you’ve been kind of creeping me out. Weird... but whatever.”

Grabbing her heels, Hyoyeon hurriedly made her way to the front door. “Anyway, see you!”

“Hyoyeon unnie!”

Hyoyeon poked her head back into the room. “What?” she asked impatiently, clearly in a rush.

Seohyun stared at Hyoyeon and opened to speak yet no words came out. She stood there stammering quietly underneath her breath while directing her gaze to the ground.

“Hurry up Seohyun what?”

The maknae shook her head, “Nothing unnie. Have a nice ti-”

The door slammed to a close

“-me.”

Silence washed over the room.

The seconds passed and soon enough a roar of excited squeals boomed from the living room and in the midst of it all, Seohyun could hear how Hyoyeon simply yelled at all of them to shut up, a smile evident in her voice. The teasing had begun and to the maknae it was like music to her ears.

Seohyun chuckled, took her books and placed them in their rightful places on the bookshelf. Standing still she took a moment to stare at her remarkably neat workspace. She sighed.

“By the way unnie, remember not to fall in love.” Seohyun whispered into the quiet room, “Not that I would care.”

**************

The night air had a certain crisp to it, nipping at Hyoyeon’s skin once she felt the cold breeze rush into the lobby whenever the doors would whoosh to an open. Looking at her watch she saw that it was five minutes before 7 pm. This could only mean one thing... Jinwoon was late.

Tapping her foot impatiently on the marble floors of the lobby, Hyoyeon fiddled around with the bangles around her wrist. Back and forth she walked from wall to wall, swinging her feet forward with each step until all of a sudden she felt her clutch bag begin to vibrate.

She stopped walking in the middle of a step and clicked her tongue in irritation, knowing exactly who it was.

Hyoyeon fished the communication device out from it's place and read the name displayed on the screen (just in case she was mistaken). It read: Choi Sooyoung. Hyoyeon scoffed and rolled her eyes, immediately shoving her smartphone deep into the confines of her bag. It was the fifth time Sooyoung had called her within the past hour. Hyoyeon assumed that after five calls the girl would get the message and stop calling.

“Yah!”

Hyoyeon bit the inside of her cheek. She stood her ground and feigned obliviousness as to who the voice belonged to and who they were calling out to.

“What are you doing?! Hyoyeon-ah!”

The irritated voice was increasing in loudness, accompanied by the rushed clicking and clacking of heels against the white marble floors. Hyoyeon craned her neck out in various directions as she looked out the glass walls of their dorm building, hoping to see if her for the evening had arrived before the sole object of her irritation that day would appear before her.

She looked at her watch and cursed, “Damn Jinwoon.”

“Hyoyeon!” Sooyoung grabbed Hyoyeon by the wrist and turned her around, “Thank goodness you’re still here.”

“Jinwoon’s coming to pick me up soon. What do you want?” Hyoyeon mumbled flatly, not even glancing at the shikshin.

“You...” Sooyoung paused and looked around to check for listening ears. She continued in a sharp whisper, her words revving on without pauses,  “What about Jesshika? You never told me about this date thing and all of a sudden during a shoot I get a text from everyone who’s just going on about it like a bunch of proud mothers.”

“Well now you know.” The dancer replied monotonously.

“Well drop it. Cancel or whatever.” Sooyoung exhaled exasperatedly, “Don’t tell me you were lying back at the fanmeet.” She leaned in much too close, her voice becoming rigid as she stared firmly into Hyoyeon’s brown orbs, ”Don’t.”

“If I told you I was lying you would just tell for all the world to hear wouldn’t you?”

“What? No! I never—you’re not making sense Hyoyeon.”

Hyoyeon chuckled sarcastically, “Then explain to me how Tiffany or Sunny, or whoever else you told, would know about this stupid love thing with Sica?”

Sooyoung’s eyebrows furrowed at the sudden accusation, silently forming shapes to gibberish as she stammered. This was brand new information to her and finding any words for a coherent response was like looking for gold. “I-I don’t know! I had no idea they knew, but I didn’t say anything. That, I promise.”

“You promise... right. Just like you did before?”

“Hyoyeon,” Sooyoung held the shorter by the shoulders “you know I wouldn’t do that. Even if they have every right to know, I wouldn’t do that because I know... I know you’re not ready for something big like that.”

The shikshin stared into Hyoyeon’s eyes to show her sincerity yet the older girl wasn’t having any of it. Hyoyeon remained silent and broke the eye contact, peering out the glass walls once more to check for Jinwoon. Sooyoung continued.

“But I told you Hyoyeon-ah. I told you. They already know. Didn’t I tell you this time would come? And... it's not like it's particularly hard to figure out.” Hyoyeon glared at Sooyoung, “Uh, no offense to you. Maybe you’re just on edge because of lack of sleep and figuring yourself out, and now this date business. What the hell, Jinwoon is like 20 minutes late. Anyway, listen. Just cancel.”

“I’m already here Sooyoung. I’m already dressed, ready to go.”

“Then what about Sica huh?”  Sooyoung’s eyes narrowed into thin slits, “You finally accepted it and now you’re going on a date.”

“It doesn’t have to be Sica.” Hyoyeon said matter-of-factly.

“Don’t...” Sooyoung chuckled softly in disbelief. Hyoyeon wasn’t particularly stubborn, but maybe she would have to start changing her answers for those interview questions. Stubborn Seohyun is out, breathtakingly stubborn Hyoyeon is in. “Don’t keep doing this to yourself.”

“You’re so persistent. Do you really want me and Sica to end up together?” Hyoyeon said, her voice barely above a soft whisper, “Why? Why aren’t you surprised? Something you knew to be true, changed, gone just like that.”

“New doesn’t have to be necessarily frightening Hyoyeon-ah. What I think is up to me and right now, I want my very awesome friend happy. This,” Sooyoung paused as she made up hand gestures to get her words flowing, “This going out and trying to find someone else... I know they, Jinwoon or whoever, won’t make you as happy as Sica will. I’m just trying to save you the trouble and goodness, how you love trouble.”

Hyoyeon tucked her clutch bag under her arm and raised an eyebrow. “By causing it? Maybe if you kept your mouth shut, no one would know and then I wouldn’t have to worry about that.” the dancer’s lips formed a tight, thin line as she eyed Sooyoung accusingly, “And then you know, going on a date wouldn’t be so bad. Actually this date is a great thing, since they won’t suspect me anymore.”

Sooyoung shook her head in disbelief. Just how many times did she have to repeat herself?

“You really, absolutely, are convinced that I told?” Sooyoung picked at her teeth with her tongue and huffed a short chuckle. She shook her head.

“I don’t know but you’re annoying me right now with your meddling.” Hyoyeon looked at her watch and clicked her tongue. She really needed Jinwoon right now. She didn’t care if they were terribly late to the group date or if he kidnapped her. Sooyoung was making her head hurt asking her to think about all these things she had already been thinking about and it irked her immensely. Jessica, Taeyeon, Tiffany and Seohyun, now her too? Sooyoung was supposed to ease her mind not add to her thoughts. “It’s my life. I’ll do what I want.”

Sooyoung pursed her lips and nodded. “This is ridiculous... Anyway, even if you put on a little blindfold on everyone by going on this date, they’ll see eventually. Eventually Hyoyeon. It's not like they can’t feel it.”

Sooyoung crossed her arms and quickly glanced out the glass windows, at the cars passing by, and her lips hard. It had begun to snow and as the white flakes floated down ever so slowly, she noticed Jinwoon get out from his car and dash towards the dorm entrance.

”Hyoyeon, what do you expect to find by going on this date with Jinwoon? Huh? Yah.”

“What I knew.”

And that was the last thing Sooyoung heard from Hyoyeon that night. The blonde haired girl willingly let herself be whisked off by Jinwoon and after she got into the car, hit the younger man in the arm before he closed her door (a punishment for his tardiness). She disappeared into her ’s gleaming silver BMW as the vehicle’s engine revved soundly whilst speedily driving along the lit up streets of gangnam district.

“Kim Choding.” Sooyoung muttered to herself and turned around to go back to their group’s floor.

**************

The restaurant was dimly lit, barely illuminated. The light from the potlights were lowered enough so that the ambiance could be preserved without customers tripping as they walked from one spot to another. Each table was decorated with a simple white linen cloth and placed on the center of each, was a small metallic lantern, surrounded by an array of red and white roses. At the far end of the luxurious eatery windows that stretched from the floor to the ceiling welcomed in the moonlight, allowing customers to admire the night scenery of Seoul city.

Jessica sat with one leg over the other at the darkest corner of the restaurant. The light from the pot lights grazed her figure and all the light practically absorbed by the square table instead. She stared at the red brick walls of the restaurant, her eyes then skirting along the tables, until she found herself staring longingly out the wide set windows. How she wished she was sitting where the light was and in her wishful thinking, she wondered what kind of person her mother picked out.

This person had to be a vampire or a light hating humanoid of some sort, choosing a spot that was virtually void of any light.  Being an idol however, Jessica still felt somehow thankful. The spot hid her well and the seats around her, lowering the chances of a possible scandal.

Jessica chuckled to herself and played with the eating utensils on the table, pressing down on the head spoon to lift it's hilt up. Now that she thought about it, what were the other two like? It was a group date after all. None of them knew each other, or would it be just her that would be left out of the loop? She groaned at imagining the situation. Jessica knew herself that she wasn’t particularly an expert at meeting people for the first time. She just hoped that at least one of them was an excellent moodmaker.

Like Hyoyeon. Hyoyeon was an excellent moodmaker.

Jessica head-desked, frightening some of the other customers.

She was here to forget, to move on and now she was remembering the person that caused it all.

With her forehead temporarily glued to the linen cloth, Jessica turned her head to the side, her cheeks pressing against the cold surface. And then... she remembered, but not as if she had forgotten in the first place.

“Hyoyeon loves Sica?!”

Remembering Yuri’s outburst at the fanmeet, she wondered: did she have any more reason to be here?

Talk to Hyoyeon and tell her how she felt, then she would be happy. Was it that easy? Or was reality simply mocking her and her misfortunes?

But true or not, Jessica couldn’t help but let the corner of her lips lift up to reveal a giddy smile.

It was such a sweet lie; so euphoric was it's taste that Jessica almost let herself drown in it's illusions for a second. Yet somewhere, deep within her heart, past the regions that the logic created by heartache had consumed, she believed it to be true.  Choosing to believe however, was a new pain in it's entirety because how does one determine truth from deception, when the truth itself can be so deceiving?

Jessica had enough. Unrequited love had a strange, addicting sadness to it and it was time for Jessica to put a stop to it. She planned to go out with someone (whether she liked them or not), confess to Hyoyeon, get rejected and then slowly try to ease herself back into living with her groupmates. It was a foolproof plan except-

“Hello...? I’m really sorry I’m late. I’m surprised you’re still here after 45 minutes.”

That voice. She knew that voice.

Jessica sobbed inwardly at her luck.

“What are you doing here.” Jessica mumbled, clearly annoyed. Not seeing any importance in sitting up straight she let her arms hang at her sides, her head anchored onto the table.

“I’m sorry,” The man chuckled, “I must have the wrong table.”

“You’re doing a blind date kind of thing, right?”

“Umm, yes... yes I am.”

Jessica bit down on her gloss stained lip. It made sense now. No one preferred dark seating places at restaurants more than idols did.

Never would she ask her mom to set her up with anyone. Never again.

“You don’t know me?”

“No, I... isn’t that the point of a blind date?”

Jessica sighed, “God, you’re dense. No wonder you and Hyoyeon broke up. You two are too alike for your own goo—”

“Jesshika-sshi?” The other responded in astonishment.

Jessica chuckled. She clapped softly, as if to sneer, and sat up straight in her seat, glaring at the other as she leaned in towards the light, revealing her face clad in sunglasses. Just as she was about to open to speak, she heard another familiar voice growing in intensity, drawing closer towards them. She paused and listened, her eyebrows furrowing as she inched towards realizing who the voice belonged to.

“Doojoon?”

Jessica’s eyes widened.

Taking hold of the edge of Doojoon’s coat, Jessica roughly dragged him closer to her, catching the boy off guard and nearly causing him to sit on her face. Jessica stifled a squeal as the curve of Doojoon’s cheek touched her nose and remained still. She pinched Doojoon’s thigh. Doojoon yelped.

“Stay still.” Jessica whispered harshly as she looked up at Doojoon threateningly.

Doojoon’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion and every time he would try to ask for an explanation from the ice princess, he was met with a pinch that nearly ripped his skin off. Hissing, he rubbed at his thigh vigorously and gritting his teeth, he quickly faced forward to the other two attendees.

“Hyoyeon.” Doojoon smiled at the blonde haired girl and nodded at Jinwoon, “I didn’t expect you to be here with Jinwoon. I thought Jinwoon would...”

Hyoyeon forced a smile, clinging onto Jinwoon’s arm rather sweetly, “My date here is a wimp so... I mean, it's no problem if I’m here right?”

“Umm,” Doojoon scratched the back of his neck and lowered his gaze to the floor, his mouth becoming dry. He gulped before shaking his head, “No... N-No, none at all. In fact it's great since Jess—Ow!”

Bending down, Doojoon rubbed at the back of his thigh in an effort to soothe the stinging sensation that resulted from the scorpion sting of a pinch from Jessica. He smiled painfully while clenching his jaw to suppress the throbbing pain in his thigh, “Nevermind. Nothing.”

“...Sica?” Hyoyeon inquired slowly, one of her eyebrows rising. Her ears had to be fooling her.

The sirens were going off in Jessica’s head. Her adrenaline levels were skyrocketing, urging her to run as fast as she could out of the room. She couldn’t breathe all of a sudden and although she knew she should be finding some obscene escape route out of the restaurant, she couldn’t even manage to wiggle a single muscle in her body. Just a moment ago Jessica thought her plan was foolproof but no. All that had to happen was have her appear and that was it. Throw Doojoon into the deal and the night was practically ruined.

Leave, stay, pretend to be someone else or hide under the table for the rest of the evening—Jessica had so many choices, a lot of them having to deal with avoiding Hyoyeon. As she listened in to the three attendees’ conversation, she quickly imagined possible scenarios.

If she left she could avoid Hyoyeon and whatever uneasy situations that would occur that evening, but could she handle leaving Hyoyeon alone with Doojoon? If Jessica left, she knew Doojoon would have to leave. There was no purpose for the boy to stay any longer, but as the ice princess stole glances at Hyoyeon and Doojoon, memories of the two’s onscreen kiss made her blood boil. Doojoon wouldn’t leave and if not, then she wouldn’t either, especially now that Jinwoon was around. Jessica had twice the trouble to deal with aside from Hyoyeon.

Jessica smeared the palm of her hand onto her face in frustration.

She did it again.

Hyoyeon was never hers, yet such a huge part of her was so convinced that the dancing queen was. There really is no escape. Not from Kim Hyoyeon.

But perhaps, if Jessica stayed, she could finally convince herself into letting Hyoyeon go.

Perhaps.

******************

Mather father.

I don’t know how novelists write hundreds of pages without dying in between.

A round of applause for them lol.

Anyways, if you guys haven’t figured out Taeny...

I don’t know how to make it any more obvious XD

Out of curiosity does anyone know if Soshi still live together? o_O

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