A/N (aka the crap you don't want to read when you see an update):

*gets hit in the by a stray pitch fork* I'm so sorry for updating two months late. Please forgive this author >_<

Thanks for being patient with me *bows* Its summer vacation now so I'll try and update every week like I originally planned lol. But don't hold your breath. After a month I would think that getting back into the groove of things would be easy but my brain just says "Haha lol no". This fanfic is so draining I swear and when I started it I went in thinking I would just BS everything but now look what I did to myself XD

Anyway this update is more of a filler. I always seem to use that word these days. I say filler because its more to get the story to move along and focuses more on character development and side characters that are important (like Sooyoung and Sunny).

On to the reading~! Have fun with emoSica ヽ(*≧ω≦)ﾉ

The Color of Our Memories:

Chapter 13 (part 1) - And the Clock’s Hands go... Boom?

- Jessica’s POV -

“If you thought of me as a friend, you would’ve pushed me away."

I'm so stupid; an idiot. I should have stopped myself from getting so emotional. Now look what happened.

I've just dug a grave for myself. Jinja. There's no other reason for why she would say that—she knows. That would be the only reason. And there's no estimate for how long she's known.

As I drive down the road, I adjust my sunglasses with my index finger and shake my head at my reproachful behaviour today. I reach for the radio to turn on some music. Distraction. I need a distraction, but wait...

Radio?

My fingertips graze over the button and as if on cue, the touch sparks a recollection within me.

Radio station... we had a guesting for a show back in November.

My eyebrows knit, my eyes glued to the road whilst my hands and feet guide the vehicle forward. The previously silent constrictions of my heart intensify until the beating becomes an isolated sound, sending a series of throbbing reverberations down my limbs as my recollection increases in vividity.

That day at the radio station we almost had a fight.

My mind blazes through a flurry of images of Hyoyeon dragging me down the hallway, Hyoyeon saying sorry and then it... it freezes. It freezes allowing me to recall the stern look on her face while she says,

“You’re hiding something from me.”

I bite down firmly on my lips and my face twists and darkens with the acquisition of this new found revelation.

God, she's always known. Always! There's no other explanation for that day and this day. How could I be so blind? And just that day she was acting so weird around me!

I scratch a nonexistent itch on the back of my head rigorously. What do you do now Jung?

Hyoyeon has probably just been holding it in this whole time and now she's had it with you. After that obvious show of jealousy she probably can't stand you anymore. She probably hates your guts.

You're disgusting.

B-But back in the hallway... she wanted that kiss as much as I did didn't she? She did! The way she stared at my lips and looked into my eyes was too overwhelming to possibly be just for the sake of proving a point.

She knew I was jealous the whole time yet she still—she still—comforted me, embraced me, talked to me in that comforting voice like usual. Normal, she treated me like normal.

I press the horn for absolutely no reason, once or twice I didn't care, and without noticing I press further on the pedal, the vehicle accelerating in correspondence. The road before me clears magically and each vehicle swerves to a clear.

The past few months has she been treating you like normal? You two can hardly speak to each other.

And all those times she would stare at you is most likely because she doesn't know how to react. She doesn’t know how to approach you. If she can hardly deal with you loving her if you were a boy, how can she when you’re a girl?

You thought she might have felt the same way about you? Hah! You’re so naive, so hopeless. Following your heart isn’t going to get you anywhere on this one.  

She didn’t even want to kiss you, I bet.

That must be why she was so angry when she kept asking me about our argument back in the dorms. She was in such disbelief that I reacted that way towards her and Doojon, that—

Calm down.

I pull up towards the driveway of my parent's home and take the keys out from the ignition, the car vibrating to a halt. The grip I have of the steering wheel loosens to a light hold and letting gravity take control, my hand drags down the sides of the wheel defeatedly.

I sigh in exasperation, fully regretting the lack of emotional self control I had. This mess between me and Hyoyeon wouldn't have existed if I just ignored whatever she had going on with Doojoon.

Doojoon. I scoff at the name, but at this point there really is nothing I can do. She took him back. What? Its not like I was expecting her to suddenly fall in love with me.

I chuckle dryly at myself. Stupid Jessica, acting so possessive about something that never existed.

The reflection of the sun's light from one of the car’s mirrors catches my eye and I wince. After rolling down the windows, I pull my hand out to adjust the mirror and seeing my own reflection, I stop to look at it as if to expect it to talk back to me.

There's no use hiding this anymore.

I sigh and rest my head against the steering wheel, my body suddenly feeling heavy.

I can't believe I'm doing this.

All that work of making sure she never finds out when she knew this whole time.

Can I really do this? After this there is no going back.

I don't have a time machine. After months of wishing for one I would think I would have one by now.

I can't keep running from her and expect that everything will be alright.

Hate me, find me gross, erase my existence do whatever you want. You already do without me saying anything. I know you’ll reject me, but for our sake, I’ll be honest with you.

If I want to take a step forward, I have to do this. I-I have to... I have to make myself known. So that everything will be settled...

I have to confess.

*************

Inside one of SM Entertainment's dance practice rooms, the loud thumping of So Nyuh Shi Dae's soon to be released Japanese single beat against the cloud wallpaper covered walls. Beneath the playing of the pop tune, the steady and firm clapping of an unsatisfied dance teacher struck in time with the beat.

Switching from position to position and pose to pose, the squeaking of sneakers added to the symphony of practice. Legs kicked, hands sharply jabbed into air, heads bobbled from left to right and hair was being flipped provocatively, hips effectively being accentuated. In spite of what appeared to be perfect harmonization and the crisp, precise execution of movements there was a quality that was lacking. An intangible quality that was out of technique's reach and could only be achieved through unbridled companionship refined over years through toil.

"Tsk," The dance teacher clicked his tongue under his hand that covered his mouth loosely―a habit he developed whenever a time for critique would be needed. This time however he had no clue exactly what it was that should be critiqued.

He stayed still, his ears filling with jagged breathing from the nine girls and his eyes taking turns to analyze each tired face. The longer he stared the quicker it came to him. Did the room always reek of gloom? Sure practices were hard and tiring, often dragged out, but there was warmth and a sort of tenderness that exuded from the nine despite that. It was the plain contentment of being together that always kept practices b with positivity.

He let out a ragged sigh.

"Are you guys okay?" He paused for a moment and chuckled, "You guys did good, but... I don’t know. You tell me."

They all nodded and taking that as a signal not to meddle with intergroup affairs, he sighed heavily and tightened the fit of the cap on his head. Crossing his arms he walked over to his knapsack on the floor and picked the black duffel bag up.

"Good practice. I'll see all of you again in a week or so. Right now it's Girls Generation right?" He smiled weakly and signalled his departure with a slight nod of the head and like that the nine girls before him bowed accordingly.

Once the door closed softly with a click, the girls dispersed and off they went to do whatever they did after practice. Several of them began stretching and cooling down, while some simply became wet rags and plopped onto the ground lifelessly, exhausted. Tiffany however, chugged down half her water bottle, stretched a little and turned the music from the speakers back on. She sprung back into the rhythm of practice, working hard at refining the sharpness in her movements.

After finishing her own cool down regime, Sunny sat on the floor with Yoona and Sooyoung. The three were huddled around each other in a circle as they watched Tiffany practice while munching on some snacks.

Yoona rested her head on Sunny's shoulder, the aegyo queen's shoulder poking into her cheeks and fluffing them up. She reached for a snack in one of the bags on the floor, her eyes never leaving Tiffany, and when her hand was met with nothing but air and plastic she frowned.

"As usual." Yoona huffed into Sunny's shoulder.

"Sooyoung, if you say you're going to share then actually share." Sunny scolded half-heartedly as she turned her head around to look at the eating shikshin who clearly did not have a care in the world.

They resumed lazily observing the other members, still worn out after practice. Without any special intention Sunny's eyes gravitated towards Jessica. Behind those cold almond eyes hid a secret near to coming undone. It could both be nothing yet something at the same time and the only sensible action to take was to patiently wait until Jessica would come out with it. That is, if she ever did. It had to be soon, because with the strange tension that had taken residency within their group there was no more room for secrets. Telling and being afraid of telling had become one: both actions would create new concerns.

After that “little” argument that took place in the dorm’s kitchen a week ago, it was hard not to know what the ice princess was hiding. It was the exact equivalent of the girl hand making a flashing lights sign that obnoxiously flared and pointed towards her. Jessica rashly advertised just how strongly her feelings for Hyoyeon had transcended the fragile boundaries of love and friendship.

As Sunny watched Jessica she saw how the younger girl walked to a nearby wall and pressed her back flatly onto the cool surface. Jessica slid down slowly to sit on the wooden floor next to where her towel sat on top of her bag. She grabbed the cloth and began to wipe off the sweat that had appeared on her neck, all the while stealing occasional glances at a stretching dancing queen. Sunny chuckled a little under her breath knowingly and redirected her attention towards Hyoyeon.

The group's choding nearly dove for her water bottle that she placed on the floor as soon as she finished stretching. However, seeing the container’s close proximity to the ice princess, she backed away and tried to "borrow" Yuri's instead. This little show of theft almost resulted in what could have been a water fight. Sunny's eyebrows perked up a bit and she pursed her lips together, the jumbled puzzle pieces of a once unthought of puzzle fitting together to form a bigger picture. The aegyo queen had finally completed the whole picture, but was it the right one? Sunny was completely sure. She couldn’t have been mistaken, but being the analyzing individual she was she knew there was a small chance of her hunches staying as just that—hunches.

Sunny continued. She watched the ice princess stare at Hyoyeon from the corner of her eyes and then comb her hair back whilst looking into the distance pensively. The strange alternation of Jessica's facial expressions showcased her not so hidden internal conflict with herself.

“You have a crush on her or something?” Yoona eyed Sunny warily with a raised eyebrow, “This isn’t the first time I caught you staring―hey!”

Sunny flicked Yoona on the forehead with her index finger, sending a quick flash of pain onto the afflicted area that beckoned for a soothing rub.

“Sorry!” Yoona whined, “It’s just that Yuri unnie has been making me really paranoid with the things she keeps telling me about the stories she finds online.” she explained hurriedly so as not to evoke the wrath of The Soonkyu, “I’m kind of getting scared now to be honest…”

“Can you pass me that water bottle? Stupid Hyoyeon took mine.” Yuri had finished stretching and walked up to the three. She pointed towards the plastic container on the floor beside Yoona’s thigh and in return the doe eyed member looked at the bottle and then up at a waiting Yuri. To comply or not? Yoona could only imagine what devious intentions hid behind such a mundane act. After witnessing the mess of unsolved arguments back at the dorms a week ago, Yuri had not stopped with her newfound method of being able to make Yoona’s skin crawl. There was no question as to why this instance would be any different. Yoona was sure of it. Bothering Yoona (or any of the members for that matter) was an unstated hobby of Yuri’s.

After an eternity’s worth of contemplating, Yoona finally passed the bottle to Yuri. She tried her best not to make any eye contact with Yuri and when the elder received it with indifference, relief washed over Yoona. Except…

“Thanks baby.” Yuri quickly said before taking a sip and plopping down onto the floor to sit cross legged beside Yoona. Yuri sat impossibly close, staring at Yoona flirtatiously and drinking with such vivid, shameful suggestiveness with the simple use of her tongue. If drinking from a water bottle could get a person banned from Korean television, Yuri would make it possible.

The doe eyed girl shivered in disgust and made no tarry to move to Sunny’s other side, scrambling across the floor as if it were covered in grease and jabbing Sooyoung in the thigh with her foot in the process.

Yuri cackled at her handiwork and in doing so choked on the water that hadn’t made it’s way fully down . She coughed hoarsely and because the other three were too tired to lend a hand, they just ignored her.

"We should do something..." Sunny mumbled worriedly under her breath.

"Its too late for Yuri. She's beyond help." Sooyoung said with a mouth overflowing with pieces of half eaten fruit.

"Not that! Look at them—" Sunny nudged her head up towards the five that were spread out around the practice room, "All that scene is missing are some dark clouds and rain."

Sunny was never one to openly voice out her concerns like this, so for her out of all the members to speak out was saying something. The four on the floor observed the other five splayed out across the practice room:

Tiffany was practicing yet glaring at her own reflection, her eyes occasionally straying to catch a not so stealthy admirer from the corner of the room. Taeyeon watched Tiffany and instantly turned away every time their eyes met. She hastily drank from her water bottle and pretended that she had not been staring with obvious melancholy, sighing relentlessy with a far off look in her eye.

The group’s maknae was silently disoriented, completely out of tune with her favorite unnie and keeping to herself as she plugged in a pair of headphones. As she stretched out her limbs, she accidentally hit the kid leader in the shoulder. Even though a quick apology should have been said, Seohyun did no such thing. No apology, no words. Seohyun merely looked at Taeyeon with wide eyes and shuffled over a rather large distance with hinted uneasiness.

Jessica gazed at Hyoyeon, the desire in her eyes to converse with the dancer bluntly painted in her brown orbs, yet every time she tried to get up she would sit back down and sigh. Hyoyeon, sat on top of one of the set up fold out tables... strangely quiet and composed, taking sudden interest in the hardwood floor.

"We need to do something. Those arguments last week weren't very pretty. We should have talked about it." Yuri spoke up quietly after feeling her skin crawl at the outstanding amount of awkwardness around them.

"But they never want to talk whenever we bring it up." Yoona chimed in, the volume in her voice low, and sat upright, her arms crossed tight against her chest. “They always find some way to avoid it and it's not very hard to since we’re always so busy.”

"We should make them talk then; an intervention or something. Something where they can’t wiggle out of talking." Yuri said to the other three.

“Guys be quiet, it's not like they’re deaf.” Sooyoung whispered harshly.

“Relax. With the music on and the five of them off in lala land, I’m sure they won’t be able to hear anything.” Yuri said reassuringly.

"What do we do unnie?" Yoona turned to look at a quiet Sunny who simply listened in.

Slightly caught off guard, Sunny nudged Yoona lightly with a push to the shoulder, "You're the choding, think of something. You three are So Nyuh Shi Dae's gag team; the moodmakers."

Sooyoung looked around the room and pursed her lips together in thought. She too wanted everything to be cleared up and for there to be no misunderstandings between the nine of them. However, what would surface if they all decided to corner Hyoyeon and Jessica wouldn’t be particularly easy to deal with for the two and so she tried to veer the three’s intentions elsewhere.

"A group intervention would scare them or make things worse... we should save that for later. We should be patient." Sooyoung added.

“I think we should just lock them all in the same room together.” Yuri said while chuckling to herself. She leaned on one arm and drank from her water bottle with the other. “Hyoyeon and Sica in one, and Taeyeon and Tippani in another... easy right?”

"What about Seohyun—" Yoona said before she was cut off.

"I swear after that filming for Hyoyeon’s kiss scene she hasn’t been thinking straight." Sunny frustratingly said, “You know what she did?”

“What?” Sooyoung replied.

“She actually stopped filming by walking in front of the camera for no reason.”

“Jinjja?!” Yoona’s eyes widened, the other two mimicking her expression.

“Prim and proper maknae doing something like that? Are you sure you’re not joking?” Yuri questioned in disbelief.

“Look at how she’s been acting lately, do you think I would joke about this?” Sunny said, her tone serious in every sense of the word.

Sooyoung sighed, "I'll talk to her. Its easier talking to Seohyun. Unlike the other four she won’t blow up so easily."

"How did this all happen anyway? I don’t get it. Especially Taeyeon and Tippani. They were so chummy and then all of a sudden they look like they can’t handle being in the same room.” Yuri said.

“Its probably something stupid again. You know how those two can be sometimes. What I’m really curious about is Jessica and Hyoyeon...” Sunny pursed her lips together.

Sooyoung’s ears perked up.

“This may sound crazy but... I think they might be...” Sunny drew a heart shape in the air.

Quiet.

Utter silence.  At this point it was quite obvious what Sunny was hinting at. No words were needed to know what each of them had been thinking.

“Well that would certainly be awkward.” Yuri nervously said while combing her hair back. “I think you’re overthinking things. You have to be mistaken, that can’t be it.”

Sunny shook her head, “I’m not saying they are but you know, Sica did seem a tad bit jealous—”

“A tad bit?” Yoona interrupted, “She looked like she was just about ready to murder Hyoyeon unnie!”

“Suppose they were... what would you guys do?” Sooyoung, who had been quiet the whole conversation, asked.

Again absolute silence. Yuri stammered silently, trying to find the right answer as she blinked repeatedly. Sunny just sat quietly pondering on the question as she stared down at her feet, twiddling her thumbs. Yoona combed her hair back and dug holes into the floor with her eyes, biting down on her lip as she imagined Hyoyeon and Jessica as a couple with agonizing difficulty.

Yuri cleared , cutting into the undisturbed quiet, "U-Umm, lets talk about this later. Next schedule is in two hours. We should get ready." She stood up and went to gather her things, the other members following suit without question, thankful to have been saved by the time constraint. Sooyoung hoisted herself up and stretched her arms in the air, looking in Hyoyeon’s direction.

"I can only keep quiet for so long." Sooyoung thought to herself.

Sooyoung was powerless. For a person holding the most knowledge of what was really happening within their family, one would think that it would provide an upper hand to things. It was a strange situation to be in. Knowing the most gave the ability to be able to cool the tension that bubbled up, yet inversely it also gave the ability to break already broken ground.

The most the shikshin could do was to deny any knowledge of the truth at all―to shrug her shoulders and point fingers. Some things in life just couldn’t be helped and was certainly so when it came to matters such as these.

Sunny walked past Sooyoung as she drank from her water bottle. She stopped in front of the Shikshin and looked up at her calmly, “What do you think about Hyoyeon and Jessica?”

“I think you’re overthinking things Sunny.” Sooyoung said without thinking, as giving a hesitant answer would give her even more unwanted attention than she already had drawn to herself. She walked over to her bag on the floor, picked it up and followed the rest out the doors, leaving Sunny to think about her words.

*************

- Sooyoung’s POV -

Here I am, sitting at this long table set up for us with the other nine members, fresh out of practice. But no one would ever think that with how nice we look right now.

On my left is Kim Choding, sitting at the very end of the table, and on my right is Sunny chatting along with Taeyeon about something I won’t even bother to process right now.

Ouch, what is that? I feel something poke me on the arm. I don’t mind it at first but as seconds go by it gets really annoying, really, really, really—

“Yah.” I turn to my left and grab the sharpie halfway on it's journey towards my arm. I  push it away annoyed and rub at my shoulder,  “Is something the matter Hyoyeon?”

She shakes her head and turns to look straight at the crowd of not so silent fans. Did I mention we’re at a fansign right now? Yeah. Perfect. Our fans get to see how disoriented we all are right now but they probably won’t think of anything. At least I hope so. Smile and sign stuff, and they won’t notice a thing.

Who am I kidding? There are fans that are so attentive they even surprise me with stuff I didn’t know about. The ones with sharp eyes? Yeah, those are the ones that can pick up on the tiniest of details.

I stare at Hyoyeon for a few moments and see how blank her expression is. She pokes me like that and doesn’t say anything? Whatever. I don’t feel particularly in the mood to talk. All this drama is getting to me.

But I wonder...  

I swing my head to the right and try to see what everyone else is doing. Seems normal. Yuri, Jessica and Tiffany are talking quietly about something while Yoona and Seohyun are goofing around.  I guess it's just me and Hyoyeon that isn’t talking. Wait, I feel her poking me in the arm again. Any more of this and my arm will bruise

I take my own sharpie, ready to poke her in retaliation to the incessant jabs in the arm I’ve been receiving, but I stop when I see her point to the paper on the table with her eyes.

She wrote something.

「I don’t know what to do anymore Sooyoung.」

I stare at it hard for a few seconds, confused by what she means by that and then it came to me.

I chuckle. This isn’t about Jessica. Why would it be? Thats stupid. Why would I even think that?

“Do we really have to discuss that here? Can’t it wait until we get back to the dorms?” I ask her quietly while giving a big grin to crowd.

“You know there’s hardly any room for a sit down.” Hyoyeon responds as she smiles to the crowd, giving a wave here and there.

I keep a calm expression making sure not to attract any sorts of attention and write down my reply accordingly.

「Its been about a week since that showdown between you two. What happened? You haven’t been talking about anything.」

She waits a few minutes before writing something down.

「I almost kissed her.」

My eyes widen and I look at her with my mouth gaping open.

N-No, wait—what?!

I search her face for any traces of an oncoming joking and find none. She gives me a firm look from the corner of her eye and turns back to smile faintly at the crowd.

I close my mouth after a while and gulp, the surprise in my eyes being replaced with amusement.

Well now this is interesting. Sometimes with how dense these two are I don’t know whether to hit myself with a brick or to laugh until my sides hurt.

“And how did that happen?”

“It just did alright?” She says frustratedly. Exhaling, she takes the cap off of her sharpie and rests her chin on top of her palm. I pretend to mind my own business and fiddle around with a few papers, trying to look busy, and then after a few moments she begins to write the rest of her reply.  

「We were arguing one moment and in the heat of it, I kind of lost myself for a moment and...」

I quickly look up at her, my eyes widening and...

I laugh. I laugh really hard. So hard that I can’t sit up straight anymore and fall over the table. Oh I bet this is going to be captured on a fancam.

Shaking from laughter, I take my pen once more, I try to write my reply but my shaky hands keep me from doing so and as a result my writing looks repulsive.

「You almost made out in a hallway. Nice work trying to keep up your public image.」

Annoyed, she slaps me on the shoulder while blushing and pushes me away roughly as I cackle in delight.

“Yah, I’m actually looking for your help and you’re laughing at me. You’re such a nice friend.” Hyoyeon mumbles under her breath sarcastically..

I calm myself down and write another reply, 「You l-o-v-e her~ ♥ Thats so cute.」

After reading my reply, she looks down at her hands. She plays with her marker and then with the awkwardness she’s so well known for, she meekly turns her head to the right. I look at her for a moment and see how her eyes quickly become glazed over like donuts (mmmm, donuts). Following her gaze, I see she’s staring at Sica who was busy playing rock paper scissors with Yuri.

I whip my head back to grin at her knowingly and her eyes widen, the twinkle in her orbs burning out. She becomes flustered and annoyed at my knowing grin, and hurriedly scribbles down her reply on the quickly filling sheet of paper.

「No Sooyoung. Just no. Not Jessica.」

“And why not?” I ask out loud with a goofy smile on my face.

She deadpans and says, “Really Sooyoung? Can’t you see how that won’t work out?”

“Its not like I can’t see it Hyo. Don’t lie to yourself. You’ll only be hurting yourself in the long run.“ I take my pen and write down the rest of my words, 「You’ll be doing both yourself and Jessica a favor by being honest. No actually, you’ll be doing all nine of us a favor by being honest.」

Hyoyeon looks up at me after she finished reading, “What’s that supposed to mean?” She asks quietly with a fake smile plastered on her face.

I fiddle with the pen in my hand and stare at her before quickly scratching down my reply, my eyebrows furrowing. I sigh exasperatedly. This is gonna be a long one.

「I can’t keep covering you up Hyo. They know. They’re not saying anything yet but they know. And what are you gonna do when they come up to you to ask because you’re being so damn stubborn about your own feelings?」

Loosening my grip on the sharpie, I let it fall onto the table carelessly and push the paper towards Hyoyeon for her to read. I rest my chin on top of my palm and drum my fingers on my cheek. I look at the crowd of waiting fans. They’re so excited. It's been an hour since we got here and they still won’t let the fans start lining up. They must be tired waiting. Some of them look like they haven’t had much sleep.

Ouch, my arm.

Hyoyeon pokes me in the arm (a bit harder than usual) and I look down to read her reply. 「What is there to hide? Besides it's not like I actually like Sica.」

I grit my teeth. If we weren’t at a fansign right now I would’ve flipped this table and down it would have tumbled onto the poor waiting fans below. Seriously? She practically develops insomnia because of Sica and almost kisses her on the lips and she’s still going to play dumb like this?

Waving at a few fans in the front, I grin.

“Don’t make me slap you.”  I say firmly behind my clenched teeth.

After waiting a few moments I write down another reply.

「You’re such a stubborn choding. Don’t make me strangle you. Yah, why won’t you just admit it?? Admit it!!!!」

She reads my reply and looks up at me to give me a glare. Taking her pen once more with a bit of sass, she hurriedly scribbles down her reply, her hold on the writing utensil resembling a fist.

「Do you think it's that easy for me? Do you think this happens everyday? It's not Sica. it was never supposed to be Sica. This is not what I saw for myself Sooyoung.」

I quickly read her reply and immediately feel guilty. I tell her to confess and just accept what she feels for Sica, but I’ve never taken the time to actually think about what she’s going through dealing with all of this. I’ve never fallen in love with a girl, but does that really matter? If you’re in love, you’re in love. It's not like I can’t relate with being in love. What does gender matter anyway. That just complicates things.

“Sorry for joking around like that. But Hyoyeon-ah...” My eyebrows furrow and I her hair in consolation. Her features soften and her shoulders slump.

Sometimes I forget that even though Hyoyeonnie is the one that always listens to everyone, she needs someone to listen to her as well. She may be the one thats always smiling for others when they’re down, but the truth is she’s just as fragile.

Sliding the paper towards me slowly, I write yet another reply.

「 Ignore what people might think for a moment, it's just us two. Be honest with me, be honest with yourself... do you love Sica? Don’t be scared, I won’t hate you. It's nearly impossible for me to after twelve years.」

I wait for her to write down something, but I see that she had her pen held tightly with two hands, her finger tips whitening as she did. My eyebrows knit in confusion and my eyes slowly trail up her arm to look at her face for any sorts of reactions.

My eyes widen.

Her eyes are wet. Ridiculously wet.

She’s staring off into the crowd, her bottom lip trembling from the pressure building up within her eyes. It was so slight that it wouldn’t have been noticeable from a distance but up close it was completely apparent.

Her dark brown orbs dance around in various directions and my worry soars to new peaks. Seeing that she might spill tears any longer like this, I grab her by the arm. I pull her in gently and hide her face behind mine, away from the cameras.

I whisper into her ear, concerned, “What’s wrong?”

I feel a tear wet my shoulder as I hear Hyoyeon whisper into my ear with a trembling voice,

“I do.”

**************

Oh do you now Hyoyeon-ah? :P

Okay, thank you time~

First of all... ho shet, 56 subsrcibers. Da fuq. Are your heads on right?

This fic is so ugly why would you even—

You know what? Whatever lol. I just want to say, THANK YOU

for subscribing this crappy fic of mine ;A; hugs for everyone >_<

And to all the awesome people who actually take the time to comment

thank you. You don’t know how much encouragement writers

get from comments :D Jinjja.