Ren went straight to school, his graduation was held few days ago and so he able to go home to his country. Coming to their university, Ggeum University, makes him excited, today is his two best friends graduation, but of course he knows that jr will be there too. He didn’t showed up, he proceeded to the side area when everyone march inside the hall.

He immediately saw his ex-boyfriend, though there are changes in him, he quickly notice him, blonde hair, the gloomy aura of the man, and seems Jr also notice his presence. Good thing he heard the name Kim Jonghyun and Jr needed to go up to the stage. He quickly run and hid himself.

He waited at the car for his friends. Hoping that he can avoid bumping with jr. Minhyun and baekho are speechless though he message them a day before his flight but still in disbelief because they are not expecting him to go to school, aron, V and jin were totally surprised.

“Ren? Is that really you? Minhyun went to his friend and hug him tight.

Black hair, short cut, it’s not the usual ren they have before. The way he look now is too strange for them.

“how's everyone? Ren spoke and smiled to everyone..

“well,,wow,,you colored your hair black? I thought you hate it? Baekho started to question..

“well in my school,,they prohibit a male student to have blonde and long hair..ren pouts….but I’m still ren…

Everyone’s eyes grew wide when Jr suddenly came and interrupted the atmosphere. He was shocked too when he saw ren standing in the middle surrounded by everyone. He can’t say any word, he was just staring at him, examining him from head to toe. He wants to ask why did he leave, he wants to interrogate him what really the reason why he left. But his tongue tied and he can’t talk.

“hi,,,ren greeted as if he was just greeting a friend whom he didn’t met for a long time..

“yeah,,,hi,,,jr stuttered..

“owh ren you’re here..baekhyun came and was surprised too..

“yeah..I just came back…where is chanyeol hyung? Ren asked..

“he’s there..I’m taking the car,, well come with me..baek said with crumpled brows..

“sure..ren replied…

“V,, congratulations,,,I’m proud of you,,,I’ll treat you the next time,,im sure your parents will treat you out today..baek went to his brother first and gave him a kiss on the cheek..

“you can just join us..V rolled his eyes…

“owh come on, don’t ruin your parents’ moments with you,,this is a special day,,we have a date reserved, for the two of us..

“okay…V shrugged..

Jr still staring at his ex-lover while Ren felt awkward and just give glances to him. He congratulate everyone and waved.

“congratulations,,,Jr,,he said at the end..

“yeah,,ahmm,thank you,,Jr forced a smile. He can’t actually describe how he feels,,his broken heart slowly treated when he saw ren in front of him. But he doesn’t know if he will be happy or get worried more. The way ren talks and act in front of everyone leaves a curious impression to him. Will they can able to reconstruct their relationship, is ren already moved on and doesn’t want to go back with him, do they have the chance to continue what had been stopped 3 years ago? Too many questions, too many puzzles yet he’s still hoping for them both.

“see you around guys..ren smiled and hugged everyone, from minhyun, baekho and followed the others, he paused and stood in front of jr. he slowly lean closer and gave him a light hug and pat the back which jr froze.

“let’s meet again,,jr whispered…

Ren shut his eyes while hugging his ex-lover and heard him whispered. He pulled out without any response and quickly hug the next, aron.

A bad timing to consider for everyone, Jr’s fiance came to look for him. She catches everyone’s attention including ren.

“hey I’m looking for you, abeoji told me to come with you, we’re having a dinner at your~~~~she paused…~~your place,,,she continued.

Jr didn’t replied, he was still staring at ren. The girl notice it, she clung unto her fiance’s arm. No one talked, it became more awkward.

“you’re back.. The girl uttered.

Jr shove the girl’s hand and gets inside his own car. The girl stood there exchanging look with ren.

“ren let’s go, your brother is waiting…baek called and glance at jr.

Baek opened the door of the car, ren gets in at the back seat without glancing at jr again. Baek looked at him through mirror.

“hyung! When you left home and didn’t showed up with my brother, what have you been thinking that time? Ren lowered his head and asked all of a sudden…

“that time,,I was thinking if chanyeol is fine? Is he eating well? Is he drinking whisky again? And, is he waiting for me to come back… baek answered..

“did you ask yourself if you really can live without him? Ren asked again..

“I didn’t, because I know I can’t, even if I left him, I know it won’t last too long.. I admire you for living alone without him, for enduring everything…sacrifices are admirable, like what you did? Baek expressed..

Ren followed by silence. Baek begun to drive to fetch his lover at the front of the hall.

“I told you to just rest at home,,chanyeol told as soon as he gets in the car and saw his brother.

“I’m fine,,I’m not tired and besides, I told minhyun and baekho that I will congratulate them personally..ren replied,,,you look so fine now hyung,,hmmm is it because of baekhyun hyung? He joked trying to change the topic.

“tshhh,,,I got it,,,I won’t scold you today,,anyway where do you want to eat first before going home? Chan shook his head and asked, he was sure that he met his ex-lover again because of the facial expression, it was a bit down though the brother tries to be cheerful.

“I want to go home,,I want to see mom.. And I miss my room for goodness sake..ren sigh and rolled his eyes..

“your room only? You didn’t miss me? Chanyeol raise a brow..

“of course I do..just that it’s not a big deal since you have baekhyun hyung with you everyday…aigoo,,ren hissed…

“okay okay,,you won…chan just shrug..

“I’m going to take a nap,, just wake me up when we’re home.. Ren said and closed his eyes..

He can’t pretend anymore, to be funny and cheerful in front of his brother. He was trying to get a nap and Jr is in his mind, the sad eyes, the reaction when they met. When they exchange looks, when they hug and the man whispered to him, the warm breath that passes his ears, the warm temperature of him when he hugged him. It’s like a lightning that strikes his body and felt the electricity run through his spine. He imagine again how Jr kissed him passionately before, how his man touches him softly, how they exchange passionate moment in bed, he remembers all the lustful moment they joined together.

He was squeezing his hands and controlling his emotion. He opened his eyes and try to divert his mind on the view outside the car.

“it’s really different here compare to London, the signboards, the stores, the road, the people walking, everyone there are busy, it is more calmer here. He thought…

“I missed…you,,he murmurs…

On the other hand Jr was silent while on the car with his fiance. Both not chatting as usual. Jr never exchange good conversation to his fiance, he never liked talking to her though their soon to be wedding is coming so near.

“what was that for? Fionna broke the silence.

Jr didn’t answer, instead he focused on the road while he is actually thinking about ren.

“he changed his look, like what you did with yours..fionna commented again..

“don’t ever ever meet him again, I’ll forget what happen a while back but never try to meet him,,she added…

Jr step foot on the break all of a sudden in the middle of the road. Glaring sharply to the girl.

“don’t ever, ever tell me what to do, I’m sure you know who are you to me…Jr says strongly as he grabbed the arm tightly.

“I’m just reminding you,,we’re getting married soon,,fionna was taken aback and almost cried with the sudden action of jr..

“we will have the wedding and you will regret marrying me…you know how I feel, you know to whom my heart belongs to…jr smirked..

“oppa,,why can’t you love me? Why can’t you even like me?..the girl cried..

“simple, I love ren…

“he’s gone for too long, he left you, just move on,,he doesn’t love you anymore?

“only ren can tell me if he doesn’t love me anymore…jr said and gets out of the car…

“Yahhh come back here…the girl screamed as soon as he followed him outside..

Jr just looked at the number of cars behind them that keep buzzing their horns, but he didn’t mind, he run and left the girl.

“oppa!!! The girl cried more..

“hey!! Can you move your car out of the way?.. one of the car owner behind shouted…

“haissttt,,,the girl hissed and had no choice but to drive..

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Ren went straight to his mom’s room as soon as they reach home. Showing up his new look and a bright smile to her.

“you look handsome minki, my baby…mom talked and opened his arms,,,

Ren went to his mom and hug her tight. He sigh and the bright smile had dropped.

“mom..I’m back,,I won’t leave again…ren said in a low volume..

“something’s wrong? Are you tired? You look gloomy now….mom commented…

“ahm I’m fine,,but maybe I’m tired,,is it okay if I go and rest? He asked..

“rest son..empty your mind…gain some strength, enough strength so you can bravely face everything, and to have enough confidence…I am always here…mom said..

Ren found his mom’s words confusing, but since he’s not mentally prepared and he met his lover that fast, he almost break down, good thing he already expected to see him since he came to their university just to congratulate his best friends.

He proceeded to his room, flopping down, laying in stomach and feel the soft sheet of his bed. He flip and lay his back, looking up to the ceiling while picturing Jr’s new image. But his daydream was cut when his brother came in after a few knocks. He sited hugging his knees.

“what do you want for dinner? The older asked…

“anything hyung…he answered…

“are you alright? The older questioned when he notice him look so weak..

“I’m alright,,,he assured and pause…hyung,,,I,,,,I met jr at the parking lot…

“then?

“you’re not mad?

“why would I…of course you will meet him because you are at school…

“I promise it’s not my intention…

“no need to explain ren…you had enough scolding from me before, who am I to stop you from what you think will make you happy…I realize it already,,and I accept it already that you are not a 5 year old kid that can’t protect himself or can’t have the right to decide for himself…

“what do you mean?

“you can decide on your own,,you’re old enough,,but be sure to think multiple times before dealing with a decision…

“hyung!!! Ren jumped to his brother and hugged him so tight.

“I love you ren, you know how much is it..I don’t want to see you hurting and having a hard time but I realize that it will just strengthen you and it will make you learn by yourself if I let you go…

“thank you,,and I love you too,, you are my brother and i know, that being strict with me that time is just part of you being my guardian..

“I know you want to see me crying here,,but kid you failed because I won’t cry unless it’s baekhyun leaving me again..

“ahhh only him huh…ren pouted..

“of course I know you won’t leave me….

“did I heard someone mentioned my name and I was drag here to witness how much sweetness you have here….baekhyun came all of a sudden and joined the two…

“nothing,,,chan said and looked at his brother…

“yep it’s nothing,,why are you here? Is dinner ready? Ren said..

“yeah,,let’s go down and eat?….baek response..

Ren wear a smile leaving the room while his brothers slowly follows behind. Chanyeol extend his arm to his boyfriend’s shoulder.

“what have you been talking to? Baek raise a brow as he looked up to ask.

“it’s nothing..I just told him that he can’t make me cry, because,,,chanyeol paused…. the only thing that would make me tear is when you leave me…he said mumbling and avoids his lover’s eyes..

“what is it? Baekhyun pretend to not heard it..

“ahhh,,ahmmm,,my tummy’s growling already…chanyeol uttered, shy to repeat what he had mumbled…

“what can we do now,,ren already graduated, that’s the end of my contract with you, so I can leave this house right?…baek said, but didn‘t mean it, he’s just watching his boyfriend how to react.

Chanyeol stopped from walking and looked straight to his boyfriend. Baek stopped from walking too and took a minute before he turn around.

“what did you say? I thought we already talk about this? Chanyeol pardoned for confirmation..

Baek gasp and burst into a small laugh. He walk forward to his man and extend his arms around the waist and tightly hug him, he flatted his ears on the chest and listen to how much beat his man have. Do you really think that I can leave you? He muttered into whisper..

“don’t joke with me about it..chanyeol shut his eyes..

“I made you so nervous…baek grin and pulled out from the hug. Looking up to his man and cup the face…I’ll stay with you,,he added and flatted his lips with him..

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“Jr! aron who was with his now boyfriend, minhyun, called as soon as the newly graduate entered the club.

He was supposed to have his dinner with his fiance and the both side’s families. But he left the girl in the middle of the road. His mind was full of Ren especially now that he knows the boy came back to the country.

“why are you here? Minhyun asked…

“I don’t want to show up with my damn future in-laws..Jr hissed and immediately drunk the shot..you, why are you here? Don’t you have a celebration with your family?

“tomorrow,,,because I want to spend this day with him…minhyun answered pointing with aron who was behind him…

“tssss..so I interrupted a date,,,jr mumbled…I’ll go in one hour, just let me drink..,,he added while looking at his watch..

“is it ren? He looks so different….aron commented..

“we haven’t seen for a long time, I was surprised that he gave up his blonde long hair..he loves his hair, he’s like a new boy and a stranger at first look..minhyun added…

“I really wanted to hold him,,I missed him so much but I froze and I didn’t know what to say or do…Jr stated…

“you just had to grabbed that chance…ahhh by the way,,ren told me that he will take me and baekho to his friend’s performance, he asked me to ask everyone to come,,do you want to join, you can then talk to him? Minhyun announced and suggested…

“I don’t think it will work that way,, maybe he didn’t wish to see me there…I’ll pass..Jr shrugged and shot the last glass but he really wants to say yes and come with them…I’m going…he waved..

“it’s your decision…minhyun pat jr on the shoulder..

Jr left and had to rethink minhyun’s offer. He reach home and there he found his future in-laws with his fiance on the living room. He immediately greeted them and bow, apologized politely for being absent, but in his inner thought, he was cursing the slowness of time and he had to see them still in their house.

“sit…Mr. kyu, his father talked…

“ahmmm,,I,,Jr tried to reason out so he can go but he failed..

Mr. kyu didn’t let him talk and gave him sharp glare. He sited, no other choice at all. Sitting across fionna while he was controlling his eyes to drop. He felt the effect of the few shots of tequila in his body. Going weak and dizzy.

“ahmm abeoji can we just have a moment,,maybe we can hang out in his room, he looks so tired…fionna spoke..

Jr rolled his eyes and press the bridge of his nose trying to regain his normal strength.

“okay,,do as you wish..Mr. Kyu granted..

Fionna stood from her seat and faked a smile to his drunk fiance. Jr then stood up and bowed to the elders. He led the girl and they went in to his room. He quickly jumped to his bed an positioned himself.

“you’re not planning to sleep right? The girl asked as he opened the curtain of the window.

“what’s with the act? Jr huskily questioned…

“nothing,,,am I that really unimportant to you for you to drink and show up with my parents, drunk? The girl said and stand on the window..

“you know who you are to me…you are still a stranger trying to ruin me..even ren had gone, nothing had changed, you are just nothing to me…Jr response…

“I know,,Ren is the only one for you, that’ why I planned to crash him and ruin his life, and made him banished in your life..but you are too cruel and you’re making me eager to make his life miserable and make me hate him even more…

“from the start, you know already who I love, but you always try everything to be close to me..I appreciate your effort, I know that you like me a lot since the first time we met, you are too obvious, but I can’t return everything to you. I love ren and I will never love you or any girl out there..

“I don’t want you to regret everything oppa,,,think about this again…you have no choice in the first place…

“decline the marriage and find someone else…you will never be happy on my side, I can’t give you the happiness you want…I’m sorry, and I will never regret for choosing ren over everything…Jr muttered and closed his eyes…. He’s my life,, he’s everything to me…He mumbled and doze off..

The girl didn’t able to hold back his tears, he cried while watching the man. She knelt on the floor and grasp the sheet of the bed. Few minutes later the room is filled with silence. She fixed herself and took another glance to the man. He put the blanket to him and left him sleeping. Going back to the elders and tried to be normal and fake a smile to hide the pain lingering inside her.

“im sorry,,I let him sleep..and besides I want to go home,,if you don’t mind abeoji,,I want to rest also..the girl said crumpling his nose..

“I see..okay then..well it’s getting late too..till then,,Mr. kyu stood and led the in-laws outside.

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Few days more later, ren attended the show of his friend hanbyul. The band came back to the country a year ago, but they didn't lose communication with ren, so hanbyul invited him to their performance.

"you're alone? hanbyul asked..

"ahm no,,my friends will come later.. he answered and sat across the vocalist..

"have you met him? is he coming?..hanbyul asked again..

"we met, but i don't know if he's coming.....he answered again..

"i see..hanbyul jut nod his head...

"you know what? are you interested in him? you always ask about him..ren mocked..

"aigoo,,jealous? hanbyul tease..

"of course not,,it's just that you always ask about him..ren smirked...

"whose jealous? someone talked..

"owh,,hi minhyun,,baekho...hi aron,,he greeted..

"wow this place is huge? minhyun commented while roaming his eyes around..

"owh by the way this is habyul hyung..he introduced...

"hi? glad you came..hanbyul waved...

"they are my friends...minhyun and baekho are my bestfriends,,and aron hyung, actually he's ahmmm...ren paused...

"his ex-boyfriend's bestfriend,,,aron spoke and pat ren's back..

"yeah,,,anyway...let's wait for the others...ren said and continued talking to hanbyul...

30 minutes later, Jin with V came and Jr coming behind them. Silence as soon as the three came to the table where ren and others stays.

"hi,,ren greeted and waved awkwardly to jr..

Jr just waved back and looked at the boy sitting across ren.

"ahm this is jin hyung and his boyfriend, V,,and this is....ren pursed his lips..

"i'm Jr..he introduced and shake hands with hanbyul..

"so it's you,,ren's obsession,,hanbyul joked..

"yahhh!! ren elbowed hanbyul, the rest just widened their eyes...

"sorry,,i didn't mean anything,,you know i just called him his obsession because ren always talk about him back there in London...hanbyul said..

"stop it,,,ren whispered...

"fine,,okay,, hanbyul raise his hands up....ahhh so cute..he remarked and pinch the cheeks..

"awwwtsss...yaahh!!! ren frowned with giggle...

Jr just look at the two, from the moment they entered the place he notice already how close ren was to the new boy, how close they are when talking to each other, and how sweet the boy to ren. He was controlling himself to not get jealous but he felt it from the time he saw the two and he can't avoid it.

“anyway,,just order your drinks I’ll be back in 10 minutes,,I’ll just check the guys…okay baby? Hanbyul said and pinch ren’s nose..

“ahhh,,you always do that,,just go…ren shoo the boy, hanbyul just smiled with his dimples…owh wait it’s your treat right..you owed me a treat for one year,,so I’ll order anything I want…ren stuck his tongue and winked..

“…..hanbyul opened his mouth to say something but he was cut immediately..

“no complain,,,ren pinpoint the other’s nose and whined…you promised me when I called you, you said it’s fine…

“fine,,okay,,aigoo..hanbyul frowned and shook his head…

“thanks..okay guys,,order all you want..ren then said…

“order mine, you know what is it…I’ll be back…hanbyul said and left…

Nevertheless, Jr was silent, everyone are silent, a little surprise with ren, he looked so happy and cheerful.Jr felt sinking, he doesn’t know if ren intentionally do his actions or did he really had moved on.

“you look too close to him…minhyun commented…

“ahh,,actually I hate him before when we first met in busan while we are in our vacation,,I was so upset that time and he just pissed me off more so I was so mean to him..then I met him in London again,,they had one year contract there,,he’s so hardworking and patient,,,,ren said excitedly..

“in Busan,,I didn’t know you had met someone in Busan? Baekho spoke…

“ahhh that’s when I was taken there by chanyeol hyung when he found out about my relationship with J~~~~ ren blinked and pursed his lips…anyway that’s past and we didn’t met again after that until I came to London..

“is he your boyfriend? Minhyun asked….

Everyone straightened up their head and focused to ren, waiting for the answer, Jr felt nervous, he felt sinking and sinking even more.

“he courted me, actually but I rejected him…but then we became close friends..he’s nice to me, he’s a good man,..ren blabbered..

“you don’t like him? V asked…

“well let’s say,,I’m not ready yet…I’m happy being friends with him, and I’m comfortable being just friends…that’s all…

“that’s…all? Minhyun met ren’s eyes..

“y~~yeah,,that’s all..ren stuttered…

“hello,,again…hanbyul came back along with their order…serious talk? He added looking at everyone..

“they are just asking how we met…ren told…

“well he caught my attention,,it’s a fate that we met…hanbyul said and hugged the boy from the back..

Jr gaze down to the arm wrapping around his ex-boyfriend, staring at the fingers locked in front of him, looked up to the lips that almost touch ren’s cheeks.

“hey Mr. Jang!!!! Let’ start!!! A member called…

“I got to go…enjoy,,I’ll check you out at break..okay..? Don’t worry about the bill,,it’s my treat….hanbyul said and run towards the stage…

“you know what,,if someone saw you two..they will think that he’s your boyfriend,,the way he hug you, the way he treat you like a baby, the way he ruffled your hair, the way he touch you…well he’s cute anyway, I’m sure girls envy you having him…minhyun giggled…

Aron elbowed his lover and everyone eyed him. Minhyun shut his eyes and realize how careless his comment was. He looked at Jr.

“you looked pretty well..I’m happy for you..jr commented all of a sudden…

“of course,,he helped me a lot…ren replied and faked a smile..

Jr just chuckled and forced a smile to everyone, gulping his first bottle and stared at ren but looked away when ren stared back at him. It became awkward and silence followed for a minute. Jin and V just look at each other, baekho was looking at his best friend, minhyun and aron keeps on mouthing to each other to do something.

“aigoo..we’re here to enjoy right? We’ve graduated,,let’s cheers for our new journey…aron said lifting up his bottle. Everyone followed…

Ren smiled to everyone, showed a happy face, but deeper inside him, he’s not that happy, he’s not that comfortable with the situation, but he had to act like he was. He started a conversation, asking everyone what’s new. While Jr is still looking at him, examining every angle of the ex-boyfriend.

“may I call in my special someone? Choi minki..can you go up here? Hanbyul who was on stage, still breathing so fast after he sang, suddenly announced..

“owh there he is? Hanbyul added and pointed ren’s direction and gestured him to come to the stage..

Ren laughed and shook his head. “no…he mouthed and pouted his lips..he covered his face when everyone looked at his direction, he blushed and fan himself.

“owh he’s shy..hanbyul said and shrugged his shoulder with a pout too and start a new song.

While Jr felt annoyed and jealous already, he drunk all the remaining content of his bottle.

“Jr.. take it easy..jin went to grabbed the bottle that jr is about to open..

“I’ll go to the comfort room…ren told and rushed…

“Jr…V pat the shoulder and mouth pointed ren…

Jr looked at V and Jin, the two nodded while the rest are busy with their own. He followed ren but he doesn’t know how can he start to ask him or confront him.

Ren went inside and jr waited outside. Few minutes later ren was done and exited the comfort room, he saw Jr standing outside, they both locked eyes but ren broke it immediately. He walked and ignored the other. Jr followed and when they reach the darkest area, he grabbed ren’s hand and pinned him on the wall. Ren was struggling but then Jr hold him tight.

“let go of me…ren said in a sharp tone..

“we need to talk,,,jr response..

“we’re done long time ago. I made it clear that I don’t want to continue anymore…ren muttered and keeps on trying to push him..

“you lied,,that’s not what you want..I know it already,,you did that just to save us,,so that your brother will not expelled us..tell me I’m right…

“and so what…look,,we end it already so there’s no reason for us to continue~~~

“you end it, I never end anything between us…Jr cut him and pressed him hard on the wall..

“jr,,it hurts…ren protest..

“all this year, I didn’t do anything but to work hard, study hard, while waiting for you… and this is all I can see? Black hair, short hair? Flirting with another guy?..Jr gritted..

“Jr..I’m not your boyfriend anymore,,and so what if I’m flirting with another guy? What if I cut my hair and made it black, what wrong with it if I will change myself?..I don’t have a boyfriend, so I don‘t need to get anyone‘s permission!…ren shouted good thing it was noisy and the place is filled with music and no one notice their conversation…

“do you know how much you hurt me? To the point that I want to end my life, but I convince myself that you will come back and I will get you back to me…

“you’re still engage…I broke up with you to make things easy…

“you broke up with me, did everything changed? tell me,,,is there a changes the way everyone lived?

“yes…I broke up with you and so everyone graduated without any hassle,,,,

“but I’m still engage and you? You’re still engage…

“no jr, I’m not engage to anyone!....because I don’t want to get married to someone else because I can‘t forget~~~…ren slipped his tongue and looked away…

“you still love me,,don’t lie to yourself…jr gritted again..

“just let go off me,,hanbyul will look for me..ren said when the song was ended…

Jr lean closer and kissed him, holding him tight on the waist. Ren felt something that he always want, those lips he always wanted to have but pushed him and wiggled until jr finally parted from him. Ren tried to run wiping off his lips. Jr tried to grab him again but ren shove him. Ren stepped backward and loose his balance due to the force and fell on hanbyul.

Hanbyul and Jr exchanged glares, ren felt nervous, he was surprised when hanbyul suddenly appeared behind him. Thinking, does hanbyul saw what happened? He turn to Jr and saw him shooting sharp stares to hanbyul. There created a tense between them.

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