Insecurity

Our Second Chance

It was in the middle of the night when Hari started vomiting, taking out all the alcoholic elements there was in her body. He looked at her worried eyes as he took her hair on his hand holding it up while his other hand caressed her back.

"I'm sorry..." Hari mumbled with her head down.

Luhan didn't bother to respond with his words but rather with his actions. He assisted her by holding her shoulders walking her back to the bed. He felt Hari's temperature rising up that made him worry.

"Does your head hurt?" he asked calmly.

"A little. But I think I'll be fine if I just sleep this off."

The lady never liked Luhan worrying about her. It's not that she disliked it but she felt sorry towards him. If she wasn't so stupid and didn't drank that blue lemonade, he wouldn't be feeling this way.

The concerned man, however, noticed the guilt in her eyes.

"Alright. Rest and tomorrow, if you're feeling okay, I'll take you somewhere." he said that came along with a sweet smile.

After lying comfortably on the bed, she noticed Luhan heading outside the room. "Where are you going?" she asked.

"I'm going to sleep on the couch. It's big, anyways."

Hari puckered her lips with a slight frown. She disliked the idea of him sleeping on a couch, especially because of her. If she had the choice, she would rather sleep there and let the man sleep on his bed.

"Hari, it's okay." he reassured, as if he read her mind.

Maybe it was because he knew her too well. He knew how selfless she is and she always had put others before her even on little things. But at this moment, Luhan wanted Hari to just think about herself.

"But–"

She didn't finish what she was about to say for the reason of Luhan not giving up in any argument. It was pointless arguing with him because thoughts were always logical and true.

"Good night, Hari." he said, earning a little smile from her. He left the room, shutting the door as he lay his back on the couch to sleep.

However, he failed. Worry took over him and he couldn't feel relaxed knowing how her temperature rose. He carefully opened the door of his bedroom not wanting to disturb her sleep. He went to the air-conditioner, setting it to the right temperature for her. He took out the air-humidifier to prevent dryness that could irritate , skin, nose and lips. All night, he did as much as he could until he was satisfied enough to rest for the night.

∾∾∾

The lady fluttered her eyelids, waking up at the delicious smell of food that came from the kitchen. Luhan was preparing food for their breakfast. The moment again reminded her of the old times. Before, it was always Luhan who woke up early, usually before her, to prepare food for both of them. They both knew how to cook but the man always managed to wake up before her. Well, she's not going to complain anyway. Because his food was undeniably the best!

She stood up and looked at herself in the mirror, tying her hair in a quick bun. She washed her face before heading out to the kitchen. Although the headache was still there, it got better. It was bearable. Anyway, no headache would stop her to walk towards the kitchen when it's Luhan cooking.

"Oh! You woke up already." he beamed, slightly surprised.

He was holding the ladle, stirring the delicious soup he was making on the cooking pot.

"I can't resist the smell." she said sincerely. "It smells too delicious." She walked closer behind Luhan, peeking on his dish.

He turned around to face Hari, checking his temperature with his hand. "How are you feeling?"

She grabbed his hand, gently removing it from her forehead. "I'm okay, especially after I eat that." she laughed shyly.

Luhan laughed with her and turned back to his food. "You always don't give me a chance to cook for you." she whined. "Is my food that bad?"

"Excuse you," he defended. "You cooked for me a lot of times. I remember the first time I tasted your food, it was the best! Enough for a man to forget everything and just remember your food."

"Are you exaggerating?" she eyed on him suspiciously.

"No, not at all.” He denied. “So ever since then, I wanted to cook for you. Just like how you did for me."

The way Luhan talked made her feel so appreciated and warm. Something Hari never felt in the past years. Was it his secret powers? Hari giggled and shook her head side-to-side at the funny thought (which the man noticed but didn't mention anything).

"Wow!"

That was all she could say. Wow. His cooking didn't change at all; it all just got better. Luhan laughed at Hari's genuine reaction. Behind her shy, gentle and timid façade, there's this side of her that not many people would be able to see. And the man felt lucky to be one of those people.

"When you're done, I'll take you out to that one place we both love visiting."

That one place? She instantly knew where he was going to take her. But she can't help to wonder if he was going to take her out just for the luxury of being friends or more than that. She didn't want to keep her expectations up but she kept a tiny hope.

"Take me out?" she blurted out in her quiet voice, mentally cursing at herself after.

"Take you out." he said, nodding. "Take you out on a date. That is, if it's okay with you."

If only Luhan knew how happy she was to hear that coming out from his mouth, if only.

∾∾∾

Hari started loving the botanical gardens since the second day he met Luhan. It was her comfort place. Nothing that can be compared to anything. The beautiful combination of the warm and cool colours of many different types of flowers were so pleasant in her eyes.

At first, she never liked flowers. She hated them, in fact. Flowers wither. After they blossom enchantingly, in the end, they always die. She hated it because how can such a beautiful flower die so easily? How can the buds bloom so celestially then die as if they never became once a beautiful flower?

It wasn't until he changed her whole perspective about flowers.

"Flowers are like humans, Hari. Nothing stays forever but one thing remains. The memories. If flowers enchanted you in the beginning, it should be the only memory you have in your heart. No one dies beautifully. Humans wither too. But there comes a time when you thought that a flower that already withered will start bloom again and become a more beautiful flower than it used to be. And flowers bloom when they are ready. It's the same way when they die. When one flower dies, you know that there is another one that grows again."

That was Luhan's words. At first, she didn't really took his words seriously. For her, it was more a matter of different perspectives. It wasn't long when Hari realised the truth behind his words. Luhan was right. Ever since then, she started looking at flowers differently. The bundle of flower beds laid around the botanical garden became more and more beautiful each time she looked at them. Something that won't happen, if she didn't met him.

"What a beautiful couple."

Luhan and Hari turned their heads towards the direction where they heard a voice of an aged woman. Both dumbfounded for a while, the man realised what they both just heard faster than the lady did. His lips curved with a proud smile while the other lady, lowered her head down and smiled shyly.

But each kind of smiles they had on their faces soon faded. Neither of them knew what they really were. The man hoped that they were a couple. How he wished they still were. And though Luhan knew they both loved each other, neither of them confessed it to each other.

Hari though didn't know what to feel after what the grandmother said. At first, it sounded so beautiful to her ears but she also knew the fact that they weren't a couple.

"We....aren't a couple, Grandmother." she denied politely.

Luhan looked at her with a hurt expression. Something she failed to catch and notice. He didn't want to clarify the truth; that they aren't a real couple. He was disappointed but he couldn't blame her either.

"Oh, is that so?" The woman's face fell as Hari nodded gently. "That's a shame."

But the grandmother did not miss how the man looked at the lady. Maybe, they weren't a couple just as of yet. The love the man had for the lady was shown clearly in his eyes. It showed enough that he truly loves her, regardless of the unspoken words of affection and officiality. And, her opinion didn't change. They are still a beautiful couple.

She walked in slow steps towards Luhan, to gently pat his shoulder, leaning in closer towards his ear, making the man bent down obediently.

Hari silently watched the grandmother whispering something him. She slightly puckered her lips, curious of their secret conversation.

"I'll go ahead."

She bid a good farewell as they both acknowledged it by nodding lightly.

"What was that?" Hari asked.

But Luhan responded with no words but a smile that she couldn't read. Although she was intrigued, she can't really force him to spill out what the grandmother had said to him.

"You found her – your true love. Don't let her go."

That was the words the aged-woman whispered to him. And yes, he wasn't planning to let her go. Not again. Not ever.

It's not often for people to find their true love. Too often, they overlook at it while searching. Some are lucky, some are not. True love comes only once in a lifetime. Some have found it, while some unfortunately hasn't. True love is about patience. It's when you let time pass by and yet it's still that person you used to love. True love has also a habit of coming back. That even if two people part ways, their paths will  cross to meet again. It's that moment when Luhan realised that Hari is his both fate and destiny. Hari is his one and only true love.

∾∾∾

He drove the lady back to her home when a figure standing by the gates bothered him.

"Who is that?" he asked, bobbing his head towards the figure as they were approaching closer to her house.

Hari shifted her gaze through the windshield, "Oh, it's Yixing." she beamed.

Luhan didn't miss the smile she had. Insecurity inside him grew. As soon as he parked the car, she excitedly went out giving Yixing a warm embrace.

"What brought you here?" she asked as their hug parted.

"I just wanted to see you." he replied smiling, showing his cute dimple.

"And for how long have you been waiting?" she eyed on him suspiciously.

"About 2 hours," he chuckled.

The way Yixing looked at her bothered Luhan so much. It was so similar at how he looked at Hari, and he definitely didn't like it. It already explained who she is in Yixing's life. Suddenly, all the confidence he used to have were switched to nothing but insecurity.

She looked at her with sparkly eyes, giving him the smile he only wanted for himself. His whole system felt like it was going to explode. He felt his heart clenching at the sight that was in front of his eyes. Outraging jealousy, that's what he felt. He scoffed, catching the attention of the other two.

"Oh, right." she started. "This is Luhan, a friend of mine."

'A friend of mine.' He started to hate those words. Although at start, he loved it whenever she considered him as his friend. Selfish he maybe, but he wanted to be more than that. He wanted to be more than just a friend to Hari.

"I'm Yixing, Hari's friend." the other man introduced himself, reaching out his hand.

However, Luhan ignored it, not responding and kept his face straight. In which, Hari noticed. Noting his behaviour, Yixing shrugged it off and awkwardly smiled at the lady. He didn't took offence of his behaviour. He understood him only because he knew what he was feeling. Jealousy. When there's jealousy, there's love. And Yixing felt it the moment he looked at Luhan. And when Hari introduced him, he knew that Luhan was the one reason why she couldn't accept his love for her. She loved him and Yixing didn't need to hear to know.

It's been a year since Yixing confessed to her. But all he got in the end was the truth. Yes, it was painful but he was glad that she didn't gave him false hope.

With Luhan, who Hari was in his life was crystal clear. But who was he in her life? That's what he didn't know. That's what he was angry and insecure about.

"I guess I'll just see you next time." Yixing smiled. Hesitantly, she let him walk away and glared at Luhan.

"What was that?!" she snapped.

"I did nothing." he simply answered.

"Exactly! You did nothing! You could've at least greeted him back. What you did was rude." she argued, making Luhan bite the insides of his cheeks, obviously not happy with what's happening.

"Why are you so angry? What is he to you? Is he your boyfriend?" he questioned. "This is just a petty thing, Hari. Stop overreacting."

"Wow," she remarked sarcastically, "I never imagined you can this be rude. When we were together, I never treated your friends like that. I was never rude to them like the way you were just to Yixing."

He looked at her sternly, "You haven't answered my question. Who is he?"

"He is Yixing! He is very important to me!" she answered straightaway, with no touch of hesitation. "And I want you to respect my friends."

Luhan didn't answer this time, leaving them into silence as they shared tensed glares.

"Look, I don't get why you had to be rude at him. That's what I'm angry about. You offended my friend, and I'm not just going to shrug that off."

Who is Yixing to Hari? A best friend. A very important friend. Before he confessed, they were there for each other. He was there whenever she felt like giving up, he was there whenever she needed him. He was there for her. Always. And yet, after she had rejected him, he didn't change. He didn't took her rejection against them and Hari is grateful than she could ever be.

"You can't expect me to make friends with Yixing just for the reason that he's your friend." he answered, looking at her but not in her eyes.

With that, he walked back to his car and drove off. Hari, on the other hand, was confused. She didn't know why he reacted that way unless.....

∾∾∾

It was the same day that night when her mother noticed her daughter burying her face with her hands, as she sat down on the dining table with a hot milk next to her.

"Last night, Luhan called me that you were drunk but I didn't need to worry because he was with you. Tonight, I see you here, drowned in your deep thoughts." her mother said as she approached, making Hari look at her lifelessly. "Tell me. What happened?"

The daughter kept quiet until she took a deep breath and looked at her mother. "I met Luhan again after four years two days ago, Ma. For me, it felt so great to see him again and later when I went to his house, I found out that he kept the photos we took together. You know, those photos that we took in purpose of showing it to his grandfather." Hari sighed, "A while ago, Yixing was waiting by the gates and greeted him properly when Luhan just ignored him and had this straight face. He was never like that, Ma. He was never rude."

Hari's mother reached out for her hand, "Honey, when you married him without my consent, you knew how disappointed I got." she nodded and looked at her mother, "But as I got to know him, I saw the reason why you agreed to it. Luhan is a good man, he is a man who never does things rashly. And maybe when he saw Yixing earlier, he felt something."

Hari tilted her head, slightly raising her one eyebrow, confused, "Ma?"

"Look, what I'm trying to say is... Even though you had rejected Yixing, it doesn't really mean that he already got rid of his feelings. And the way he looks at you, I can clearly tell that he still loves you. Maybe, that's what Luhan saw too."

The lady kept silent, comprehending the words her mother was saying.

"Before you get angry or even upset at him, make sure you take into consideration of what he felt at that time. Don't just snap at him."

Hari's mother suspected that Luhan had already loved her daughter the moment she first introduced him to her. Eyes and actions really spoke louder than the words that came out of their mouths. She believed that ever since. And she was right. She approached Luhan when the oppurtunity came, and there, Luhan confessed his love he had for Hari.

Being with her daughter, living with her for the past four years after her contract marriage ended, she knew that Hari was and is still in-love with Luhan. A mother would know.

"I'll leave you to it, sweetie." she smiled softly, heading her way to the bedroom.

She took her phone in her hands, and collected all the strength, guts and courage she could get.

*ring....ring....ring*

No answer. It bothered her so much.

∾∾∾

Author's Note:

Because what's a love story with no jealousy? Hihihi.

Honestly, I'm not satisfied with this chapter but I don't know I'm stuck. Haha. The last part will be posted soon so yea.. I'm glad you guys liked it. I'm really not a great writer myself but I'm trying my best. :) See you 'till the next part. Thank you for the support. (It was much more than I expected, tbh).

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Comments

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Rosezee_exol
#1
Chapter 9: Aww.. this was such a sweet story. <3 :')
Rosezee_exol
#2
Chapter 5: Omg!! Yixing is such a sweetheart here, how he told her about Luhan's love for her. My heart. <3
Lilycake #3
Chapter 9: This soooo lovely, cuteee. Luhan is soo sweet
alexajjang
#4
Chapter 9: This is the fluffiest story ever! I love it so much ❤❤❤
kaiminIN #5
Chapter 9: It was cute...
namtae0ppa #6
Chapter 9: This bonus chap is so cuteeee omgggg <333
Thankyou so muchh for putting a lot of fluffs on this one. Love ittt!!!
keiracrean #7
Chapter 5: oh my luhannie!!!you're so sweet....great fic..
sukinee23 #8
Chapter 8: first one!
byuntaefangull
#9
Chapter 8: Both options were fine with me but i guess i preferred the first one hehe.