Jiyong has made up his mind to confess to Yoona, the girl that takes his breath every time she’s near him. He thinks about her every minute of the day. He loves everything about her physically and mentally. Her sweet laughter, the smell of her hair, the way her skin feels against his, the way her eyes always have that inner glow...every part of her.

He thinks he ought to have asked her a long time ago. The competition to win her just continues to get tougher from here. He likes to think he loves her more than enough for him to confess to her already. He likes to think he’ll be the best boyfriend she could have ever asked for. He likes to think that no other guy can come and steal Yoona’s heart away. He likes to think that she’s all his. But it’s all in his mind.

And in reality there will always be a but.

But, he thinks Yoona doesn’t like - doesn’t love him the way he does. He thinks Yoona deserves better. He thinks he’s not good enough. He thinks he won’t be able to give Yoona everything even when he has nothing left to give. He thinks about giving up.

But he only thinks this somewhere in the back of his brain. Somehow, he could not put them to words. Nothing would make him happier than to say those simple words.

Just 3 words and 8 letters. How hard can it be?

Try as he might, he couldn’t tell Yoona that he loves her. He could not bring himself to say the words he so badly wanted to say...not yet and maybe not ever - if he’s too late.

***

September 30th, 2011. It’s Monday; Jiyong and Yoona are hanging out at their favorite cafe together.

“Hey, Ji!”

The words flow out ever so smoothly from Yoona’s mouth. The way her voice called out his name would always change the rate of his heartbeat.

“Hey,Yoong.” I replied back.

“I’m so sorry I’m late. The old teacher didn’t want to let us off early.” Yoona rolled her eyes. “Hope you’re notmad though.”

“It’s okay. I’m not mad.”

I was just worried.

Yoona looked at me, finding any sign of anger or irritation but gave up when she found none.

“So...yesterday you sounded pretty urgent over the phone. What did you want to talk about?”

I stared at her thinking how the hell am I going to do this. The words I’ve been repeating in my mind like a prayer somehow refused to come out.

I just wanted to say I love you. Say I love you. I love you. You.

Yoona thinks it’s the ‘right’ time to confess his love. But he just can’t seem to do it. His mind turns dark and blank, all signs of confessing gone.

Yoona stares at Jiyong with a questioning look, still waiting for his answer. Jiyong just stares back at Yoona with a I-love-you-but-I-can’t-say-the-words look.

The silence continues to kill them both ever so painfully.

“Sorry, Iforgot.” I said sheepishly, cutting the silence.

“Oh...,” Yoona said, a bit disappointed. “Well, it’s okay. I’m sure it’s nothing important right?”

Yoona looks at me with those bright deer eyes of hers. She knows there’s something I’m keeping from her.

I look at Yoona thinking ‘It’s not important. It’s more than that.’

“Oh umm, yeah. Nothing important. No biggie.”

I tried to ignore the look Yoona is giving me.

Silence consume them again.

“You’ve been acting strange lately. Real strange Ji.”

“I thought I was already strange?” I said while giving my infamous smirk.

“Yeah, but I can differentiate your normal strange andyour strange strange. But you’re still strange anyway Ji -to the max.” Yoona said with her own infamous smirk.

“Yah! What are you saying? I’m a creature of some sort?” I pretended to be mad.

Yoona was starting to back away.

“If I answer you I might get flicked on my forehead so...no comment.” At that, Yoona ran at full speed, her hair flowing behind.

“Hey! You come back here Im Yoona! Yoong!” I yelled while chasing after her.

***

October 20th, 2011

It’s Wednesday; Yoona and Jiyong are at their park. Jiyong wants to confess he love, no more hiding. It’s now or never.

“Hey, Yoong!” I called her over.

“Hey yourself Ji.” Yoona said while giggling at me.

“How are you?” I said, trying to prolong the moment when I would confess to her.

“We just met yesterday at your house remember? Are you having amnesia or something Jiyong?” Yoona laughed.

I stared at her. The way she laughs is just so damn cute I feel like hugging her.

“So what did you want to say anyway, Ji?”

Oh God. Now’s the time. I could literally feel my inside dying. I was starting to sweat and my face drained of blood.

“Hey hey what’s wrong?” Yoona asked looking concerned. “You look kinda pale Jiyong and you’re sweating.”

“Umm, it’s just that I want to tell you something. But I’m scared.” I admitted.

“Oh really? I have something to tell you too!” Yoona said while jumping up and down.

“Oh, in that case, you go first.” I tried to cool myself off.

“You remember the guy I told you about, Ok Taecyeon. You remember him?” Yoona said while smiling. “Well, he asked me to be his girlfriend last night!” Yoona was practically squealing while jumping.

“Oh....” was all I could say. I’m sure she accepted him.

Somehow I don’t really want to hear what she has to say.

“But...I rejected him. He’s so not my taste.” Yoona said nonchalantly while flipping her hair. “Besides, I like you not him.”

“Wait....what?” I asked, still dumbfounded.

“Ugh, you’re so lame Jiyong. I said I like you. No, wait, I love you, Ji. I really do love you, more than a best friend.” Yoona was smiling at me.

“What?!” My mind still couldn’t process her words properly.

I wanted to ask her again if she was really saying the words to me, but I guess I didn’t need to repeat myself when I felt her pull me into a passionate kiss. I could feel the love she had for me and she too could feel the passion that’s been building up inside me that was only meant for her.

“I love you too Yoona. For a long time now.” I said when we broke apart for air.

“I figured it out already.” She smiled lovingly. "Can't believe it took you a kiss for you to confess to me." 

I poured my lips over hers once again silencing all the doubts in my mind while we kiss under the blue sky.