Taehyung had been living with me for a little over a week now. His presense was a granted now, although he was hardly ever home. The only real indication was the blanket of the couch, real estate magazines sprawled and the ground and the loud bangs as he entered to house at ungodly hours. Hoseok and I were, I am not to sure. Neither of us had explicitly stated that we are dating. It was strange. During university hours I spent all my free time with Hoseok. He also devoted every hour to me. Does that count as dating?

Leaving the elevator, I adjusted the bag on my back. Walking to my door, I typed out the code. The slight beep told me the door was unlocked. Opening it slightly, I knew instantly that Taehyung was home. This was a first, Taehyung has never been home before me. And second, he was singing. But what he was singing sounded so mournful. So, not Taehyung. Closing the door behind me quietly, I continued to listen, trying to grasp the context of the song.

"Remember, when things were hard

I always turned your tears into smiles

Don’t cry in places without me, don’t cry

Because you always had a lot of tears"

His haunting voice echoed within my bones. My good mood vanished, replaced with an aching sorrow. Searching for Taehyung yet trying to stay hidden him, I spied him in the kitchen, making pancakes. And I could see he was not alright. How long has he been like this? His face was hollow and colourless, his body thin. He continued to sing.

"No, it’s my turn to cry, I’ll cry now

I’ll take all of your tears

It’s my turn to cry, give them to me

Even those tears, this time

This time yeah"

I took a step closer, careful not to startle the boy. Was he always like this? His smiling face danced before my eyelids but I knew what I was seeing could not be from a single day.

"The faded photos that I almost threw away

It hurts so much that I can’t look at them now"

Taehyung dropped the spatula and crumbled to his knees. He was not fine. He was never fine. He voice trembled but he kept singing painfully. And I knew why. He did not want the silence being alone brought. Anything to break the silence.

"It’s another sleepless night I sit in

My dark room with opened eyes drawing out your face"

The hot pan began to spit, yet he made no move to stop it. I could hear his breath hitch as he fended off the onslaught of tears. And still he continued with his heartbreaking song.

"Your shy smile and gentle eyes

I want to hug you, what do I do?

Don’t cry in places without me, good-bye

Because you can’t lend my shoulders anymore"

He finally stopped as I stood a metre away. I had meant to stay silent, but I stumbled over his singular bag. His eyes found mine, and once again, all I saw was that same fear I always saw. Watching as he stood, turning off the over, I found myself reaching out for him. Before I knew exactly what I was doing, I had wrapped my arms around his frail form. I heard a weak giggle come from him, and strangely enough, that broke me more than his tears. 

"Hyung, please let me go." He chuckled. 

"No, not until you feel better." I stated before getting really embarrassed.

"Yoongi hyung~" He whined. "I just got a little carried away with the song." 

Pulling away from him, he now had a smile on his face, the only trace he had been crying was the slight puff in his eyes and the water stains down his face. He placed his hand on my chest and my heart went absolutely wild, yet he still pushed me away. Just yesterday Hoseok placed his hand lovingly on my chest and my heart stayed stoic. I had to consult Taehyung about this feeling.

"Um, Taehyung, do you have five minutes?" I asked, a little shy.

He just turned and nodded, leaning against the bench. I watched as he smoothed down his bar shirt before I attempted to talk. Taking a deep breath, I began.

"I think I am dating Hoseok." I blurted and he chuckled.

"You are. He went to the fish and chip store the day after your date and said he hates me yet wants to be friends with me." He chuckled with no humour. Hoseok did that? Shaking my head, I continued.

"But, ah, I don't think I love him. My palms don't get sweaty, my heart no longer races and the thought of kissing him doesn't appeal to me anymore." I confessed, hanging my head.

"What is my favourite colour?" Taehyung asked, and I stared at him. What? 

"Ah, I don't know. Blue maybe?" I offered weakly and he smiled.

"Ask Hoseok that question silly. A boyfriend would know the answer. If he doesn't then he doesn't care." Taehyung giggled before his drying lips.

"Really?" I asked, leaning towards Taehyung.

"Yes, now go see him and figure this out. Don't lead him along if your aren't into him." His voice dropped slightly, but I had no time to ponder further. He was pushing me towards the door. "Now go, be free!" He shouted although he was directly behind me.

My heart did somersaults in my chest, and I did not know exactly how to respond to such a thing. Taehyung was beaming, I could just feel it. Is this what they call...love? 

Once again, any attempt at aligning a thought was destroyed by Taehyung. He punched in the code, threw me out the door and smiled.

"Be a man and talk crayons!" he shouted before slamming the door shut. 

I had hardly spent anytime with him during the week and I deeply regretted it right now. Taehyung knew how to shift the mood, change it for the better. I realised I was standing outside my own door like a loser so I began to move. But I did not miss the beginning of another mournful song muffled through the door. And it broke my heart but I still continued to the elevator.

"You call me when you’re hurting

You only disclose it to me, who you want

Should I turn back time, should I give you his heart"

------------------------

I waited for Hoseok at the park. To be perfectly honest, I wanted Hoseok to get the answer wrong so I could have a right to believe he didn't love me as much. So I could justify leaving my five year long crush. Stuffing my hands into my jackets pockets, I looked around once again. He was five minutes late.

Finally I saw him, running towards me. Smiling at him, I walked towards him. He still looked so adorable, but in a way someone talks of their dog. Not about the one they are supposed to love. Hoseok stopped running in front of me, breathless and happy.

"Hey Yoongi, what did you want?" He asked.

"Um, Hoseok, weird question, but can you tell me what my favourite colour is?" I cocked my head to the side ever so slightly.

"What kind of question is that? Um, blue I guess." He started laughing and I finally saw the purpose behind the question. He didn't even know something so basic.

"White." I muttered and he stared at me. "My favourite colour is white. Yours is green."

Hoseok finally understood. He saw what I was trying to find out. Hoseok did not know me very well. Tears welled in his eyes. He knew this was goodbye.

"Give me a chance. Tell me everything you want. Please. I didn't realise I knew so little. You can love someone and realise you know nothing." He blubbered, his face twisted with agony.

"Just, give me time." I compromised, hanging my head before confessing. "I have liked you for five years Hoseok. To hear you say you liked me also made me the happiest guy alive."

Hoseok brightened at that. He grinned brighter than the sunset.

"Tomorrow. I will learn everything tomorrow. Right now, I should be studying." He told me and I nodded. He took that as a chance to leave.

Staring down at my own steady hands, I wondered if maybe I should have told Hoseok to not even bother, that my heart was elsewhere. But I wasn't brave enough. I only had a facade, a mask to hide behind. And I was sickened by my own act. Now all I had to do was head back to the apartment and wait to confront Taehyung.

A/N

This of an Author is going to add the drama. Release the drama and watch. Well, read.....ummmmm....I hope you all still like my crappy story....