My world stopped. My heartbeat, my breathing and everything around me seem to stop in an instant the moment I felt her soft lips pressed against mine. Even with the soft breeze that was blowing through us couldn’t cool down the heat that what surrounding me. She was burning against me… with her lips, with her kiss. All the agony, fury, bitterness, fear, guilt and hurt… everything just gone and burnt off by her warmth torturing kiss.    

She came into my life like a gust of wind, without any warning. She was so brave, so strong and so fearless. I was totally astonished, unprepared with her sudden attack. She was the first person who managed to provoke my long-buried emotions, dragged me out from my comfort zone. The more I step backward, the more she step forward; giving me no way to escape.

I was confused. What has got into me that I was so obediently follow everything she want me to do? I was angry with her when I saw a man eating with her in a restaurant that day. But that anger quickly disappeared the moment she stood in front of me. When she said she want to bring me to somewhere, I know that it would be a trap. But I didn’t bother and just go with the flow. I hate strangers, I hate crowds… but I said nothing and didn’t refuse when she brought me to the airport, got me into the stuffy and crowded airplane that I have not been taking for a long time. It was strange. The uncomfortable feeling always melted away whenever she was close to me. She makes me comfortable, calm and excited at the same time.

I know where she was heading the moment I got into the rented car and it drove along the familiar yet scary road that I have once been before. I thought my condition was better after I met her. At least I have started to feel something, to want something, to need something. But I was wrong. I still feel exactly the same when I was standing at this place… the place that destroyed my life and took my sister away. All the passed overwhelming fears and sadness rushed back into my systems and I couldn’t hold back anymore. My vulnerable emotions burst like a volcano and I know I have frightened her. But I have no choice. I need to push her away. I’m not the man for her. She is… she is so good, so beautiful, so perfect. She deserves better and I don’t fit the ‘good man’ category. I will only be a bad influence to her.  

But this woman is annoyingly stubborn. I pulled away, she pushed further. And… and what was that? I saw tears… not my tears but hers. She was crying and she was begging… begging me not to leave. This was the first time I saw her like that, so scared, so weak, so helpless. She… she said she care for me because I’m important and… I was breathless the moment I heard what she said next. She said… she like me. She wants to start a new life… a new life together with me.

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The grip on the notepad loosened and it dropped to the sands, drenched by the seawater along the seashore. Lee Min Ho’s eyes were widely open, looking down at the woman who was kissing him. Even though the kiss was timid but it was enough to freeze everything inside of him and everything outside of him. Her palms were soft and warm against his jaw, holding him firmly. Her scent was killingly intoxicating and her lips were mouth-watery sweet. She succeeded to defeat him once again.

Neither of them know how long has it passed and when Shin Hye pulled away from him, both were panting heavily. The panting wasn’t cause by the kiss but rather from the shock and tension between them. Her gaze was held low, avoiding his as her cheeks were painted crimson red. This is embarrassing and her action shocked herself too. She confessed to a man that was supposed to be her patient and she even initiated to kiss him.

After a long moment, Shin Hye slowly looked up and when her eyes met his intense gaze, she was breathless all over again. She bit her bottom lip briefly before she forced herself to break the awkward silence.

“You feel… calmer now?” She asked and her voice is hoarse.

Min Ho naturally parted his lips slightly, but nothing came out as usual. He wanted to reply her with his notepad but it was dropped into the water. He wanted to response but his body doesn’t seem to cooperate with his brain. Every part inside or outside his body couldn’t react at the moment. Calmer? How can he be calmer when she kissed him like that? His body, his mind… calmer, yes but it was clouded with a different kind of emotion. Perplexed, uncertain, hesitant, and doubtful.

When Shin Hye saw the notepad lying wet on the sands, his lips parted and moving slightly with his hands balled into tight fists, unsure with what to do next; she sighed silently. “You can just… talk. I mean… although there won’t be any sound but… but I can do lip reading.”

He raised his brows. Lip-reading? This is news to him. Even though he mouthed her some silent words sometimes but those were just some simple wording that everyone could read. She never told him before that she could do lip reading. Which mean all this while all those writing on the notepad was unnecessary.     

Shin Hye sighed again, understand that the expression on his face now means he wasn’t pleased with the new information she just declared. “Lip reading was one of the additional subject that I took in my university because I thought it might be useful if I encounter with any deaf or mute patients in the future.” She paused and looked at him warily. “I didn’t know it would be handy in my first case.”

“And you didn’t tell me?” Min Ho mouthed with a faster movement of his lips, knowing that she could read it no matter how fast and complicated it was.

“Because lip reading is tough and limited. Many phonemes share the same viseme and it’s impossible to distinguish from visual information alone. Sounds whose place of articulation is deep inside the mouth or throat are not detectable, such as glottal consonants and most gestures of the tongue. So lip reading must depend heavily on cues from the environment, from the context of the communication and I have to be able to see your facial and lips movement clearly. It’s difficult and I don’t want to misinterpret what you said to me. And…” She paused and breathed in deeply. “And you were used to communicate like that with Professor Kim all this while. I don’t want to change anything that makes you uncomfortable around me. Besides, it’s not easy to read what you were thinking because I couldn’t hear your voice. By reading what you wrote on the paper is much more easier for me to… read your mind.”

They stared at each other for several moments until Min Ho felt the splash of small waves on his feet. The coolness of the seawater startled him and he quickly held Shin Hye’s hand, pulled her farer from the dangerous water; as if afraid that the same tragedy will repeat again. Although he felt better compared to just now but this place still make him feel uncomfortable and uneasy. He think it would be safer to leave this dangerous place as soon as possible, especially with the woman that mean so much to him is standing here.    

He let out a deep and exasperate sigh before he took his phone out and begins to type something on it.

“What are you doing?” Shin Hye asked curiously.

After he was done, he put the phone back into his pocket and looked back at her. “Text my assistant.”

“For what?” She asked in a cautious tone.

Another deep sigh escaped Min Ho’s lips. “To get my private jet ready. You have 3 hours left before we have to be at the airport and go back to Seoul.”

Shin Hye’s eyes and lips were widened in awe at the same time. “Private jet? You own a private jet?”

Min Ho crossed his arms and stared at her. “I hate crowds, I hate people I don’t know pacing back and forth around me. I did hide myself in my house all the time but I have to travel too. A private jet is the only transport that I could rely and bring me to where I want to go peacefully.”

Shin Hye read his moving lips carefully and when he was done, she glared at him. “Then why didn’t you tell me earlier? I’ve bought the return ticket for both of us and now… it will be a waste.”

“Did you tell me earlier that you will bring me to this damn place?” Min Ho glared at her too and if he could let her hear his voice now, he would be growling at her. She is the most frustrating woman he has ever met.

Shin Hye bit her lip and looked away. “Y-You… you looked fine in the plane just now.”

Min Ho sighed again before he held her hand. He doesn’t want to argue with her at this place. “Let’s go.”

“What?” Shin Hye didn’t see his lips and was startled when he suddenly pulled her away.

He stopped and faced her again. “I said let’s go.”

“But you said I have 3 hours. I’m not done yet. You should…” She held her tongue and stopped talking immediately when Min Ho cupped her cheeks, closing the distance between them. The sudden closeness jellied her knees.

“I know what you were trying to do and although I hate to admit it but yes. It was very effective.” He paused and inhaled sharply.

“But it’s not as easy as you think. It was already a miracle that I’m still standing here right now, communicating with you with this damn lip reading… without losing my mind and didn’t throw either one of us into the deep sea.” His fingers gently caressing along her jawline and his eyes were looking deep into hers.

“I got your point… but coming here has really gone beyond my limit. I was unprepared and surely not ready to face all this yet.” He leaned forward and inched closer to her, letting her to read his lips clearly. “So please help me. Let me get us out from this dangerous place because seeing you standing here… it agitate me.”

Shin Hye gazed up from his lips to his eyes and felt a pang of guilt hit her chest. He was right. She didn’t think about his feeling and forced him to do something that hurt him all over again. She was too rush, too impatient.

“I’m sorry.” She murmured in a soft voice.

Min Ho held her gaze and pursed his lips into a thin line. He exhaled a deep breath and he grasped her wrist. “Let’s go.” He mouthed silently before he pulled her away with him.

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They were sitting in an expensive and quiet restaurant near the airport, having their late lunch before they leave Jeju-do. But both were hardly touching their foods and both were immersed in their deep thoughts.

A loud beep sound that came from Min Ho’s phone brought them back to the reality. He took his phone and after finished reading the incoming message, he looked up at Shin Hye. When he got her attention and she was looking at him, he started to move his lips.

“The jet will land at the airport in an hour time.”

Shin Hye nodded, pursing her lips.

Min Ho let out a slight smirk. “Billed the cost of the air tickets in my consultation fees. This is part of the therapy anyway. I’ll pay you back.”

Shin Hye shoot him a sharp glare. “This is not what I’m thinking. Although I don’t own a private jet, I can still afford two business class air tickets.” She rolled her eyes. This was the first time she travel in the first class seats because she knows Min Ho would not be comfortable in the stuffy economy class. Who would thought that he have a damn private jet.

Min Ho tried to suppress a grin on his face but he just couldn’t help it. Her expression was too cute. “You look grumpy.”

“I look stupid.” Shin Hye snapped.

“I think you just stole my line.” Min Ho smirked, leaning against the chair with his arms crossed.

Shin Hye heaved a deep sigh, looking straight at him. He was still angry that she dragged him to Jeju-do without his permission. “I’m sorry, okay? I mean… you were right. I was careless and impulsive. I should have think deeper before I bring you here. It was a rush decision and I selfishly thought that it could help you when I was actually hurting you instead.” She paused and bit her lip. She is a lousy and terrible doctor. “But I really mean it when I said you have to face the reality and get up from where you fall. The fear inside of you is the obstacle that you have to overcome in order to recover. You have to face it and not avoiding it. I want to help you but I need you to let me in so that I could do so.”

“Help me by lying that you like me?” Min Ho mouthed silently, staring into her eyes.

“That was not a lie!” Shin Hye almost shouted at him but later startled by her own high-pitched voice. Her cheeks burning with blush as she looked away.

His lips uncontrollably curled up into a small grin. He reached his hand forward, knocking his knuckles against the table to get her looking back at him.

“Not a lie? You mean everything you said at the beach was true? You like me, you care for me, you want me to stay and… you want to have a new life… together with me.” Although his expression looked like he was teasing her but the expectant in his eyes were evident. But why he still feels hopeful? If she says yes, can he give her the life that she wants? He doubts it.

Shin Hye held his gaze firmly and took a deep breath. “What I said over there… it wasn’t a lie. I really mean what I said.” She confessed honestly. Why deny when she was already clear with her own feeling now.  

“You are unbelievably brave.” He was amazed, delighted but feel terrified at the same time.  

A soft smile spread across Shin Hye’s face. “Because I’m not scared of you? Or because I like you?”

“Both.” Min Ho mouthed silently.

She chuckled. “If I remember correctly, you were the one who said you… want me… first.” She said in a soft wary tone.

Min Ho nodded with a smirk. He agreed. “You are right. I kissed you, seduced you and giving you no way to run away from me.” He paused and looked at her. “I was surprised that you kissed me just now.” He breathed in deeply. “What does that kiss mean?”

Her face was once again blazed with burning blush when he mention about the kiss. What does that kiss mean? Affectionateness? Impulsiveness? Or just for the sake to calm him down? She doesn’t know. But she was very sure she doesn’t regret it. She inhaled a soft breath, looking back at him.

“You were quite… uncontrolled just now.” She paused and bit her lip, trying to suppress her embarrassment. “It was meant to… distract you… and calm you down.”

“Like how you use the strawberry candy on me?” Min Ho narrowed his gaze.

“Yes.” Shin Hye quickly nodded her head. “Just like the strawberry candy.”

Min Ho chuckled again. “The next time I lost my control again, kindly use the second method because it was much more effective compared to the candy.” He teased.

Shin Hye glared at him after reading his lips. “You looked satisfied and pleased.”

“Isn’t this the reaction you want from me?” Min Ho smiled.

She looked at him and studied his face intently. He looked so relax, so young, so carefree when he smiled like that.

“Can I ask you a question?” She asked when something he said at the beach just now crossed her mind.

Min Ho nodded.

“When we were at the beach just now… you said I have a boyfriend. I don’t understand. What makes you think that I have a boyfriend? I told you before that I don’t have one.” Shin Hye asked.     

The scene of her having lunch with a guy that day slowly replayed in Min Ho’s mind upon hearing what she asked him. He cleared his throat before looking at her again. “Two days ago… when I was on my way to my office, my car passed by a restaurant near your hospital. I saw you inside… with a guy. Both of you…” He paused and inhaled deeply. “Both of you looked close… and you looked happy.”

Shin Hye creased her brows, trying to recall where she had her lunch two days ago. Just then, the memory surged into her mind. She quickly shook her head. “He is not my boyfriend. He is my…” She held her tongue and paused. She didn’t lie that he is not her boyfriend but should she tell him that Yeon Seok is not someone that just treats her as a friend? No, she shouldn’t. It’s complicated and it’s too early to tell him because… they are just doctor-patient relationship now. She admitted her feeling for him but he doesn’t seem to give her any response.

“He is what?” Min Ho stared at her impatiently.

“He is my colleague. We work in the same hospital. He is not my boyfriend.” She said flatly, giving nothing out in her voice.

Is that relief and joy that he felt inside his heart now, Min Ho wonder, suppressing a smile.

“See.”

His attention was drawn back to her when he heard her voice again.

“We can be normal, you can be normal. We are eating and chatting like normal people, in the public and you are in control.” Shin Hye said, looking at him. “You are not bothered by the people here and you look comfortable. As long as you try harder, you will recover. You will become healthy again and I’m sure you can speak again.”

He looked at her for a long moment before he moved his lips. “I’m calm because of you. I’m not bothered and I felt comfortable because you are here with me. Once you are gone, I’ll be back to how I used to be again.” He paused and pressed his lips tightly together. “How long can you stay with me like this? How long can I rely to you?”

“As long as you want.” Shin Hye said in a certain tone, looking firmly into his eyes. She smiled when she saw a shock expression spread across his face. “I’m not going anywhere… because you said you need me… and now… I want you.”

Min Ho parted his lips but unable to move, unable to response. He just stared at her, trying to find an answer through the determined gaze in her eyes.

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Shin Hye let out a wide smile, clapping her hands in satisfaction while her eyes were looking at the front.

“Ta-da.” She turned around and beamed happily at Min Ho who was leaning against the wall, looking at her helplessly.

“I still prefer my black curtains.” Min Ho said as his eyes glanced from the new turquoise curtains to Shin Hye’s face. He closed his eyes briefly, uncomfortable with the stinging bright sunlight that was seeping through the curtains. The colour was too soft and the fabric was too thin compared the one he used to have. It makes the whole living room so bright and… different.

“What is wrong with my black curtains?” He asked, opened his eyes again and mouthing the words silently.

“Nothing is wrong but don’t you think this colour is more… happier and healthier?” Shin Hye asked him back, giving him her sweetest smile. “Look around. The whole living room is so much brighter, well ventilated and fresh.”

“It’s too bright and I don’t like bright.” Min Ho creased his brows.

“It’s daytime now. It’s supposed to be bright. Besides, you don’t need to switch the lights on during daytime and it’s more… energy saving.” She said, trying to persuade him.

He can only shook his head, looking at her helplessly. He held his head down, sighed heavily. “This woman is driving me crazy.”

Shin Hye strolled towards him, trying to look at his face. “Are you saying something? I can’t see your lips.” She asked.

Min Ho quickly looked up and shook his head again. “No, I didn’t.” He lied.

“Okay.” Shin Hye smiled as she turned to the couch and took another pack of the new curtains. “It’s your bedroom and study room now.”

But before she could walk away, Min Ho grasped her wrist, stopping her. He bit his bottom lip, looking at her. “Can’t we take one step at a time? Just the living room for now and change the rest… hmmm… maybe next month?” He asked expectantly, trying his luck.

“No.” Shin Hye replied in a firm tone. When she saw the disappointment gaze in his eyes, she sighed softly. “Since the first therapy we had until now, it has been 3 months already. I’ve given you enough time to slowly get use to the changes. No more delaying. All your black curtains have to be down today.” She said sternly. When he didn’t let go of her hand, she gave him a threatening glare. “We have a deal and we had promised each other. I won’t do anything beyond your limit and you will listen to my instruction. I’ll be more patient, more considerate and you have to be more cooperative.”

What the hell? When did he agree to that? Min Ho sighed exasperatedly, recalling the discussion they had in his private jet, the time when they were flying back to Seoul from Jeju-do last month. Something must be wrong with his brain when he agreed to that deal at that time. Oh yeah, her confession and that kiss at the beach. Both happened on the same day, same time and he was totally dazed by her because of that.

Shin Hye glanced down at her wrist that was still tightly grabbed by him before she looked up at him again. “Let go.”

Min Ho clenched his jaw and slowly loosing his grip, releasing her hand.

A sweet smile spread across her face. “Good boy.” She said befo