here i am again. if you follow my twitter, you probably know why i keep being so slow with updates. let's leave the negative stuff out and just say: OH MY GOD I SAW INFINITE TWICE LAST WEEKEND *___* IE London was great, well, Infinite was great, the crowd was....meh. The pushing was bad but that hardly hurt me on the second level. I was just really emotionally hurt by the lack of fanchants. An Infinite concert without a Dorawa chant...AAARRRRGH #mad. Anyways, IE Berlin was ing perfect and I was in first row <3 so many moments with Dongwoo and some with Gyu! I'm happy for now and shall cherish those moments until the next world tour ahahahaha >=< (by the way, i met readers at the concert in London! HELLO IF YOU READ THIS! THANK YOU FOR TALKING TO ME <33)

i'm a little sick at the moment, so it took me a while to finish the update. leave me a comment juseyo~ i need it right now /sniffles/

“You bragged about your cooking so much and you only cooked ramen?” Sunggyu scoffed.

“It’s not my fault you have little to no ingredients in your kitchen! It’s not your usual ramen, I ensure you.” The younger man said. He stretched out his hand to point in the direction of the kitchen. “Come on. You need to eat something.”

He still thought Woohyun was only bluffing about his cooking skill but Sunggyu was hungry anyways. He followed the other man to the kitchen table. There were two bowls on it, both with steaming content. Whenever Sunggyu made ramen, he usually just poured hot water over the noodles and added the spice, but Woohyun had put much more work in it it seemed. Sunggyu couldn’t really see the content since there was way too much cheese on top of it but somehow it smelled very different from usual.

Woohyun grinned at him. “Smells good, doesn’t it? I made the broth myself with the help of some spices that were in the cupboard. The soup spices from those instant foods always taste like nothing. There was also some meat and cheese left in the fridge that I added. I know it’s only ramen but I guarantee that it’s the best ramen you have ever tasted! Well, the best under these kinds of circumstances. If only I had some bean sprouts or green onions...”

“Yes, yes, I get it, my fridge .” Sunggyu rolled his eyes.

Woohyun pointed at the chair. “Just try it, okay? And if you like it enough, give me a chance to buy groceries and cook something proper tomorrow.”

“You sure are working hard.” The older man muttered. He sat down on the chair and picked up the chopsticks.

“I really want this job. I don’t care about the payment. I can sleep in a closet too. I’ll be happy enough just being close to Haneul and taking care of him.”

Sunggyu pursed his lips. What are you – a saint? Was he lying or was he really that desperate? He wasn’t sure if he should give Woohyun a chance or not. “Just sit down and eat your ramen already.”

Determined to find a flaw with Woohyun’s dish, he plunged his chopsticks into the sticky cheese to try the ramen. He blew on the noodles before putting them into his mouth. Sunggyu hissed shortly because they were still hot. They were cooked perfectly but cooking ramen noodles perfectly was hardly anything to get praise for. But something about the taste was…Sunggyu couldn’t put his finger on it. He had eaten ramen with cheese before but something else bothered him...

He lifted the bowl carefully and tried the broth. Sunggyu’s eyes widened. “What’s this?!”

The younger man chuckled. “It’s broth.”

He rolled his eyes. “I know that much! It doesn’t taste like usual. What did you put into it? The new taste can’t come from the cheese and the meat alone.”

“It’s my personal secret.” Woohyun grinned at him. “I’m going to keep it to myself so you will have no other choice but to hire me!””

“Blackmail!” He scoffed. “Should have expected that from someone like you.”

Woohyun’s smile fell. “I didn’t mean it like that...”

Sunggyu felt something heavy in his stomach. He was being an , wasn’t he? “C-Can’t you take a joke? Let’s just eat before it gets cold.”

Dinner passed mostly in silence. Only slurping noises and the ticking of the clock could be heard. Sunggyu tried his best not to eat too quickly, though the ramen tasted really good. It had more flavor than the usual one he ate. Woohyun probably added additional spices to the broth but it was hard for the older man to pinpoint which he had used. He really had no clue about cooking at all. Maybe Woohyun’s words hadn’t been all bragging? Sunggyu could not cook and learning how to do it seemed like a bother. He would be busy enough with his work. Who was going to cook for Haneul then? He definitely needed a babysitter for that.

Was Woohyun a worthy candidate for the job? Sunggyu still held somewhat a grudge for what happened with his sister, but he had to admit that everything wasn’t entirely Woohyun’s fault. At least if he told the truth. Sunggyu found it increasingly hard to continue doubting him, though. The younger man was at his best behavior and his attempts to win over Sunggyu seemed genuine. Woohyun really did seem to care about his son. Could he deny the young father this? Surely Haneul didn’t have to grow up without a mother and a father.

It was difficult – making a decision for another living being. Haneul wasn’t old enough to speak his mind yet. He probably didn’t even know what a parent was yet. No matter which decision Sunggyu made, it was possible that Haneul would hate him for it later. God, I hate making decisions. It’s already hard enough just taking care of myself. Can I trust this guy?

“What about your job?”

Woohyun stopped slurping and looked at him questioningly, noodles still hanging from his mouth. The older man made a face of disgust. “Let’s say you’d be able to become Haneul’s babysitter-“

The other man’s eyes lit up. “Really?!”

“Just hypothetically!” Sunggyu warned him. “What about your own job? Do you not want to continue being a surgeon? Would you give that up for Haneul? I doubt you’ll have the time for two jobs. I wouldn’t want you falling asleep while looking after the boy.”

Woohyun shrugged. “I’ll just take a break for a while. I’m an excellent surgeon, you know, I can find work again whenever I want! People will bombard me with offers! When I left America, I was prepared to give up my career for Haneul.”

Sunggyu could see the determination in his eyes when he spoke the last sentence. It was hard to doubt Woohyun’s words. He was different from Sunggyu, who could not imagine giving his job up at all. He had worked so hard to be in this position.

“Does that mean you are considering my offer, hyung?”

He puffed his cheeks shortly. “I’m just weighing my options. Cooking is not the only skill you will need.”

“I know! I’ll work hard to convince you and Haneul!” He stood up and bowed 90 degrees. “Thank you!”

Sunggyu pursed his lips. What was he getting himself into? He should just throw that guy out tomorrow and never talk to him again! “For now you can stay here until your bank grants you access to your money again. But if you ever call me again, you can forget the job and you’re flying out of this apartment. My home, my rules. If I see something I don’t like, you’re out.”

He didn’t wait for Woohyun to reply and stood up instead. He left his chopsticks on top of the empty bowl. “Thanks for dinner. Clean up the dishes before you sleep. I’ll leave some things for you on the couch.”

Sunggyu left the kitchen without giving the younger man another glance. He grabbed his things from the living room and carried everything over to the bedroom. Sunggyu pushed the door open and it creaked slightly as it moved. He turned the light switch on with his elbow and looked around the room. Since Woohyun was going to sleep on the couch, Sunggyu would need to sleep in Seungah’s old bedroom. He took a deep breath as he took the room in. Everything was still as Seungah had left it before her death. Clothes and items were scattered around, the bed wasn’t made. The air was stuffy and seemed to bite his eyes. Or maybe he was just getting too emotional again.

He dropped his things off at the table on the right side and went to the window next to open it wide. Fresh air flowed into the room and Sunggyu took another shaky breath. Was he even going to find sleep in here? Nothing was going as planned since Woohyun had appeared in his life. Sunggyu turned around again and started to clean up the room a bit. At least enough to make it possible to sleep in the bed. He changed the bedclothes as well. Not only because they were dusty but also because they smelled like his sister. She had been gone for a while now but her scent still lingered everywhere. Evidence of her existence was scattered throughout the room and it was almost like she could enter the room any moment now, laughing happily and jumping into his arms.

Sunggyu pinched his nose bridge. “…”

“Hyung?” He jumped at the voice.

“What is it now?!” Sunggyu asked, the annoyance clearly showing in his voice.

Woohyun frowned shortly but kept his cool. “I’m done with the dishes. I just wanted to see if I can help you with anything since you seemed to be taking a while. It’s so dirty in here…Did you not use the room?”

“No…it’s Seungah’s room. It felt…wrong to go in here. Like I’m invading her privacy.” Sunggyu muttered. “It’s dumb I know. She’s not here anymore, so what am I scared of? I should move on.”

“It’s not dumb.” Woohyun’s voice sounded unexpected serious and the older man glanced at him. “It shows that she meant a lot to you. I understand you. When you keep things like this, it feels like she could return any second like nothing ever happened because everything is still the same. I think it’s normal to be afraid of letting go. I still can’t grasp it either…that she’s really not coming back.”

Sunggyu hummed in reply. The younger man looked at him. “You know if you don’t want to sleep-“

“It’s fine. I can’t run away from this forever. Seungah would probably hit me for letting her room g