Happy New Year, guys!! Sorry I didn't make it before 2019. I underestimated how much stress the days after Christmas are with birthday, New Year and my birthday party right afterwards, plus I had to work all days except the first day of 2019 lol x.x But i've managed to finish this chapter and maybe I'll start writing the next one already ;3 who knows. hehe

have fun reading guys. little rollercoaster of feelings ahead (what's new?) and leave lovely comments below!

PS: I wanted to try a new format for the text messages. Tell me how you like it XD (*messages in the a/n below in text form if needed)

Sunggyu wasn’t really feeling any better the next day but also not worse, so he decided it was time to go to work again. Waking up early proved to be quite easy since Haneul was quicker than any alarm he could possibly set. Sunggyu was very tired but awake by the time he reached the bathroom. He heard Woohyun heading towards the nursery and felt a sense of relief that someone else was there to take care of the toddler. Sunggyu wasn’t sure how he would’ve done this without a babysitter. Haneul was way too small for kindergarten after all. Still, underneath all the relief, there was also a bit of dread. Today would be the first day he was going to leave Woohyun alone with Haneul. He couldn’t help but worry about all the things that could possibly happen. It wasn’t about not trusting the younger man with his son but rather a general fear. After what happened with his family, Sunggyu felt paranoid.

Absent-mindedly he cleaned himself up and brushed his teeth before walking back to the bedroom to change his clothes. Sunggyu fixed his hair again in front of the small mirror wardrobe mirror when he was done. It felt weird to wear his work outfit again – white shirt and a tie – after so many days of casual clothing. It wasn’t necessary to suit up completely but their boss expected them to appear with a clean shirt and tie at least. Sunggyu fixed his tie one more time and gave himself a smile of encouragement. Nothing is going to happen. Don’t worry.

He slipped out of the bedroom and headed to the kitchen for a cup of coffee. To his surprise, he met Woohyun and Haneul there. The toddler was in Woohyun’s left arm, leaning against him and hiding his face against his chest. Woohyun looked at him in surprise for a moment, before he whistled. “Look, Haneul, your uncle is all dressed up. Looking good, huh?”

Sunggyu knew the other man was just teasing him but he couldn’t fight a bit of warmth creeping to his face. Nervously, he ran his fingers through his hair and then immediately stopped because he remembered he was ruining his carefully styled hair. Woohyun chuckled. “Actually, I think it looks better styled up if you’re going for hot instead of cute.”

The older man shot him a dark look and turned to make his coffee. He knew Woohyun was making fun of him but it didn’t stop his heart from irrational reactions. “Stop that. I’m just going to work and not dressing up for a date for something.”

“I’m just telling the truth, right Haneul?” Woohyun asked the toddler and Haneul mumbled something unintelligible, spreading his drool over his father’s shirt. “You would drool less if you gave me that pacifier—”

He tried to take it away but Haneul wouldn’t let go of it and became fussy, so Woohyun dropped the issue with a huff. Sunggyu smiled shortly at the scene and then grabbed his cup of coffee. “Let him have his pacifier if he’s still sick. He’s only five months old after all.”

Sunggyu went into the living room to drink his coffee while watching the news. There was nothing really interesting they reported but he liked to be informed never the less. The whole incident had thrown him out of his loop. It would take some time for things to return to normal, though, with Haneul there, his definition of normal was bound to change anyways. A part of him thought he could get used to this new life, but then Sunggyu also knew he only had this life because his sister died and it was just temporarily until Woohyun wouldn’t be needed as a babysitter anymore. He needed to constantly remind himself that their situation was only temporary. Someday Woohyun would leave and some even later day even Haneul would go his own way. Sunggyu pushed these thoughts away as they just made his headache worsen and his chest tight.

“Do you think you can get some groceries after work?” Woohyun suddenly asked somewhere behind him. “I don’t want to go outside with Haneul like this and we need some fresh ingredients.”

The older man turned his head towards him. “Sure, just message me a list of what you need. You’ve saved my number, right? You know, that number that called you like a million times when you got lost in the park?”

“I didn’t get lost! And it wasn’t a million calls.” The dark-haired man huffed and sat down on the couch as well to feed Haneul in a comfortable position. Sunggyu reacted automatically and pushed a pillow under his arm for support. Woohyun gave him a grateful smile while Haneul’s grabby hands went for the bottle.

Sunggyu willed his fluttering heart to stop and looked away quickly, busying himself with the task of emptying his cup. He glanced at his watch and almost spit out the dark substance. Where did the time go?! Damn, I’ve been too lazy and comfortable for too long. I got used to taking my time! “Sorry, I’ve got to go.”

He stood up and walked a few steps, before stopping and looking at his nephew and Woohyun. Suddenly, it felt really hard to go. “Do you have everything you need for today? Is it really okay if I leave? I mean Haneul is sick-“

Woohyun chuckled and turned his head slightly. “Are you looking for an excuse to ditch work?”

“Ugh, no…! I’m just worried!”

“We’ll be fine. Go and enjoy work, Uncle Sunggyu. Wave to him, Haneul! Uncle is leaving.” He cooed at the toddler who was too busy with his breakfast to care about Sunggyu. Food was his first priority.

The older man felt a little sad about Haneul not batting an eyelash but then again his nephew was 5 months old. He could probably not even grasp what Woohyun just said. Reluctantly, Sunggyu went to grab his bag with the laptop and then put on his shoes and coat. He thought about saying goodbye to Haneul one last time, but somehow he knew it would just make it harder to leave at all. With a heavy heart, he opened the front door to leave.

“Sunggyu!” Woohyun suddenly called and he lifted an eyebrow at the missing ‘hyung’ at the end of his name.

He turned his head and was surprised to see Woohyun coming towards him with a struggling Haneul in his arms. At first he thought Haneul was mad about getting torn away from his milk and Sunggyu was about to scold Woohyun, but then he noticed his nephew wanted to get closer to him. Haneul’s lips were trembling and his eyes were red, showing how close he was to crying. Sunggyu instinctively reached out for him and hugged him close. Haneul’s fingers curled around the fabric of his coat and the older man wanted to cry at the soft gesture. It seemed like Haneul did care about him leaving.

“You didn’t have to bring him.” Sunggyu muttered as he kissed the top of Haneul’s head, his eyes meeting Woohyun’s.

The younger man smiled. “I think he needed a while to understand you were really leaving. I’ve never seen him dismiss his milk like that before.”

He sighed and closed his eyes shortly, taking in the sensation of the warm and light body in his arms, the sweet scent Haneul carried on him. Sunggyu had read somewhere that all babies smelled good for some reason and it seemed true. “You’re making it really hard for me to leave but I’ve to go. I’ll be back in a few hours, Haneul-ah. Be nice to Woohyun and eat your meals.”

With a heavy heart, he gave Haneul back to Woohyun. The toddler started crying almost immediately. It had been easier to leave when he thought Haneul didn’t care. The younger man gave him a short smile. “Don’t worry. He’ll stop crying. He will get used to it.”

Did Sunggyu want him to get used to him leaving? He gnawed on his lower lip but nodded reluctantly. Sunggyu stepped through the open door and closed it behind himself. Sighing, he walked away, the cries of his nephew slowly fading into the background but never quite leaving his mind.





Sunggyu felt everyone’s eyes on him when he walked through their company’s office. He guessed not many knew the details of his long absence but they probably knew there had been a death in his family. He didn’t like their pitying looks one bit. Sunggyu actually preferred the colleagues who gave him curious glances or just welcomed him openly without mentioning anything or showing that they knew something. The last thing he wanted was for everyone to tell him how sorry they were and give him their condolences. He was trying to get over what happened and being constantly reminded would do no good. Besides, condolences weren’t going to bring back his family. They wouldn’t return Haneul’s beautiful mother.

“Gyu-hyung! You’re back!” Minho appeared out of nowhere to cling to him like a monkey. “I’ve missed your grumpy face in the morning!”

Sunggyu huffed and shook him off playfully. “My face isn’t grumpy.”

“But it is! Even more than usual…hm. Let me guess, Haneul didn’t shed a tear when you left!” The smaller man smiled triumphantly.

He rolled his eyes. “My nephew cried a lot, just so you know.”

“Oooh, then you’re grumpy because you have to work while Haneul is at home bawling his eyes out in Woohyun’s arms?”

S