wow guys...it's seriously been AGES since my last update (and the last infinite cb) - I AM ALIVE

y'all probably thought i quit and dropped this altogether. i'm still here though. it took me a while to get back to writing in general. life is busy as ever as i'm moving once again and my car got wrecked too. my emotions were rock-bottom somewhere in the middle too. but hey, you're all here to read woogyu not listen to me talk on and on how life is hard XD

i'll try not to let this many months pass again, sorry again guys T^T i hope you'll like this update. you'll probably have to reread everything like i did. sorry if i did any mistakes >-< it's been a while for me as well! 

only a slight warning for some strong language /cough/

Woohyun came back to Seungah’s room a while later. They stared at each other in silence. Sunggyu had calmed down, but the mood between them was still a bit sour and awkward. Sunggyu wasn’t necessarily mad anymore at the other man’s comment about his eyes. He knew his reaction had been a childish one. He was an adult man. He could it up when someone insulted his eyes. “So-“, both of them started at the same time. Sunggyu clicked his tongue in frustration. “Stop looking so guilty. You just stated a fact. Besides, it’s not like it matters what type you like. But just to make this clear: Short guys aren’t my type either.”

The younger man stifled a laugh but failed horribly. Sunggyu cleared his throat. “Anyway, I snapped at you for something silly. I’m still exhausted I guess. Can we just move on from this? Even better: let’s forget about the whole thing.”

Woohyun shrugged. “That’s okay with me. So, we’re packing Seungah’s stuff?”

Sunggyu grimaced shortly and nodded. He grabbed one of the folded boxes. “We need to set these things up first. Two boxes should do for starters. I’ll take care of her wardrobe, so how about you...” He looked around and then pointed at a shelf. “Pack her books.”

“Okay, hyung!”

“Don’t call me that!” We’re not that close!

“Should I speak informal then?” Woohyun asked with a mischievous look in his eyes.

Sunggyu puffed his cheeks. “No! Fine, call me that.” Brat!

He set up one of the boxes with ease while Woohyun seemed to need a while to figure out the system, which filled Sunggyu with some type of satisfaction. He didn’t offer any help, naturally, but Woohyun didn’t ask for it anyways. Sunggyu started packing Seungah’s clothes into his box. Some pieces of clothing filled his mind with memories from when Seungah had worn them. A few times, tears stung in his eyes but Sunggyu didn’t let more than a few silent tears escape. He was glad that he had his back turned towards Woohyun. It felt hard at first to put those clothes – memories of his sister – away, but after his first box was full, Sunggyu felt a bit liberated. Like he could breathe more easily inside the room. Seungah was gone and she would never come back. He’d have to accept that truth to move on.

Sunggyu went to get another box and spotted Woohyun looking through a book instead of continuing his work. It looked like one of those thick books your professors would force you to read for a test - only to not ask a thing about the stuff written in it during the actual test. “What are you doing?”

Woohyun flinched slightly and looked up. Sunggyu noticed his cheeks seemed wet and the other man hastily wiped them with his sleeve. “Sorry, I got caught up in memories. Sometimes I studied for tests at her place and Seungah had this habit of drawing stuff into my books. Here, see?”

The brown-haired man turned the book in his hands and showed Sunggyu the pages. In between thick blocks of black letters and medical pictures, there were little sketches made by different kinds of pens. Seungah was really bad at drawing, so some of them looked rather...weird. “Is that supposed to be an alien?”

Woohyun chuckled. “No, I think she said it was a cat.”

“Well, at least it wasn’t supposed to be human.” Sunggyu couldn’t help but smile. He took the book from Woohyun’s hands and skipped through the pages to look for more. Some pictures had little messages next to them “Fighting, Hyun-ah!” or “Hooray, Dr. Nam! You did it!”. It was kind of adorable. Sunggyu suddenly thought of a question. “How did you two meet by the way? You said you went to the same college but Seungah graduated three years earlier than you, so you were most likely not in the same semester. I don’t remember her taking medicine lessons either. Was your first time meeting in that club?”

“Ah...no, it wasn’t.” Woohyun’s gaze turned distant and the fond look in his eyes made Sunggyu’s chest tighten. That wasn’t the look of someone who had used Seungah and not cared for her. It was the look of somebody remembering a person important to them. “It’s kind of a long story.”

Sunggyu shrugged and looked through the room. “Plenty of stuff to pack.”

Woohyun seemed to hesitate. The older man sighed. “Please? I...I need to know.”

He knew that remembering that moment was most likely painful for Woohyun. Sunggyu knew how much his chest ached whenever he remembered a moment with Seungah. It just felt like Woohyun knew of a Seungah that he had never gotten to know; someone who defied their parents and sought freedom in her own personal way. In order to let go of his sister, he’d have to face the truth first. It only felt right to do so and who knew – maybe it would make it easier to believe Woohyun’s side of the story.

“Well...I actually got to know her through my older brother.”

Sunggyu blinked. “You have an older brother? You never said so! Can’t you stay with him then?”

The younger man shook his head. “He’s living near Busan with his wife and their kids. Pride of the family; he’s got his own company which does very well. My parents always wanted me to be like him – graduate with the best grades, get a well-paid and respected job, a wife and a family; in that exact order. He’s a good older brother and I guess if I asked him for help or some money, he’d definitely not turn me away. But I don’t want to bother him... He has his own family to care for and...well, my parents were pretty clear that they didn’t want me to contact him anymore.”

He grimaced shortly. Woohyun’s parents sure sounded like . Sunggyu’s parents had been quite strict as well and never supportive of his ual orientation, but at least they never kicked him out of their home and told him to never contact them or his sister again. The topic of Woohyun’s parents seemed to bring the mood down again. The younger man probably missed talking to his family. Sunggyu hastily tried directing them back to the original topic. “So how did your older brother and my sister know each other? Don’t tell me they had as well because-“

Woohyun’s amused chuckle interrupted him. “No. They had a lot of college courses together. The world is a small place, isn’t it?”

Sunggyu huffed. “No, this town is just too small.”

The other man shrugged. “Anyways, Seungah had problems when it came to math and Boohyun, my brother, asked me to tutor her, because he knew I was good at it and often tutored other students. It was really weird at first to teach someone older than me, but Seungah’s personality made it easy. She was friendly and funny, not once looking down at me for being younger or a nerd at math.” Woohyun smiled shortly. “We got closer with time and became really good friends. Even when the tutoring lessons stopped, we still met up and did things together. It always felt like I could talk to her about anything. She was a great listener and good at giving advice. I felt like she could trust me in the same way I trusted her. We had no secrets from each other.”

Sunggyu felt a strange feeling in his chest. Was it jealousy because Woohyun had been so close with his sister and known her secrets? After high school, he had left for Seoul to study without really looking back. Sure, Sunggyu had always kept in contact with Seungah, but there was a limit to how much you could know about someone’s life via text messages or phone calls. His older sister had had her own life here and Sunggyu wondered if he even knew 10% of it. Looking back, whenever she did talk about stuff like her boyfriend or college, Sunggyu knew he had never fully listened to it. He didn’t care to listen.
“Are you okay?”

He snapped from his thoughts with a slight jerk. “Y-Yeah. I guess I never thought about much about what my sister is doing outside of college. Who her friends are and stuff like that. I never asked, maybe that’s why she never talked much about it. All this time...maybe I was too self-centered to care.”

“I’m sure it’s not like that. You clearly loved your sister deeply-“

“I did but...” He sighed. “Honestly, inside I always thought there couldn’t possibly be anything interesting happening in her life. Small, boring town and all. I feel so ugly when I remember how annoyed I sometimes felt when we talked over the phone for a longer time. Like I was wasting my time talking to her. Now I wish I could go back in time and tell myself to treasure every moment; to always listen to her, even when