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You unlock the door to your apartment and went in without turning on the lights…. You felt lost and tired…, it’s only month that you had arrive in Seoul, still you wasn’t able to find new apartment…  you had no choice but to stay at old place, your old apartment where you had lots of memories…  it was hard for you all this time staying there.. But today… it was even harder ….. Again you remembered the hurt look in yonghwa’s eyes …
.
.
.
 Tears started to form again in your eyes… you went straight in to your bedroom and sat on the edge of your bed staring at the front pointlessly…

“Did I… did I just hurt him more with my words…?
                               ………….
What have I done Yonghwa…., I hurt you again…
 I should have told you the truth in the first place… but it’s too late now”………….. You laid yourself on the bed and stared at the ceiling with blurred eyes. 
Memories started to flow in to your mind …

…………… Flashback …………..
1 Year ago

“You need to leave him…” 

“W-What… what did you mean by that?”  

 Earlier the day you got call from the manager of yonghwa, telling you... That their president, wants’ to meet you. You have met him few times. When you become friends with boys...  you came to meet him wondering why would he want to meet you...
 But you become shocked… realizing his reason… 
 his sudden request made you lost your words,

“You should leave him… in other words; you have to break up with him.
His dream and everything he work hard all this long we cannot let it be in vain” You become puzzled with his statement.

“But, he loves me… H-How can I leave him…” you stutter.
“A... and you were ok with it… but why suddenly …. “

_________-ssi, no I wasn’t … I just didn’t want to make yonghwa be stressed, that’s why I said it to him… and also yes I know it very well, that he love you, but just look at this first, He gave you the tab that he was holding all this time. You took it and stared at the screen, there was a picture of you and yonghwa with article,

   CNBLUE Jung Yonghwa spotted with girl

One of the Korea most popular boy band, cnblue leader yonghwa was spotted with girl.

The past months lots of fans spotted cnblue members with this same girl…
there was a rumor spreading through the fans that she might be dating one of the members.

Even though the company denied the dating rumors, this time yonghwa spotted with this girl at a park.
Some of the fans were able to recognize this was the same girl they saw with other members.
But still no one know who is this girl, is she dating yonghwa or other member.
~~~( )~~~~
 

A/N- Sorry I’m not good at writing this kind of articles… I was stuck in this point, Sorry ^_^ you guys can imagine it… Right…? :)

Your eyes widened because of shock... you knew there was a rumor few month ago but, it was cleared and you tried your best to avoid getting attention…
“How...  how can this ….”

“This is just one article…, there can be worst things than this, fortunately we were able to cover up the photos spreading further
but we can’t help with the rumors among the fans”, he said with a sigh.
You looked at him not knowing what to say,

“Boys were really working hard this time… they don’t know that the problem is this much serious.
I Know, yonghwa would say that he wants to go public with you… “
He rubs his temple with unpleased look.
“But this is not the right time… they were just started to climb up and become stable; having scandal will affect the whole group.
He stopped and looked at you,

“we can’t do anything if something like this happen again…, there are lots of eyes on them good and bad.
_________-Ssi Please understand…, reality is not always beautiful;
you gays might love each other but do you want to see him falling down because of you….”
He paused for a moment…
“If you really love him, then leave him, it is the best solution…” he said with deep sigh and looked at you

you stared at him with wide eyes. You felt tears are forming in your eyes; Even though you were hurt you had nothing to say to him because you knew that everything he said was true.
 
“These things can turn worse in a blink of eye,
I was able to cover up things this time but I don’t want to hear anything else again” he said with stern voice…  
“I hope you will take wise decision”

For moment your mind went blank, you never wanted yonghwa to be in trouble because of you,
this is what you were afraid when yonghwa asked you to be his girl, this is what held you back when you fall for him. 

He stands up and gazed at you with expressionless face
“And another thing…., I don’t want boys to know about this, I