Back to school

“Where is heeee~?” Jaejoong whined while bouncing agitatedly on her chair.

“Maybe they’re running late. Why don’t you start if you're hungry…” Leeteuk even began serving Jaejoong some rice as she spoke.

“I’m not hungry. I want Yunnie. Daddyyyy~!”

Hankyung folding his paper slightly to peek around it. “Huh?”

“I want Yunnie.” Jaejoong demanded.

Hankyung looked at his watch and then at his daughter. “He’ll be here.” As if Hankyung had to power to bring word to life, the doorbell rang and everyone was sure it’s Yunho and Yoochun.

At the beginning of her second trimester now, Jaejoong is extremely insistent that Yunho be in front of her while she eats. That means the final year business student has to eat lunch at home now on, or maybe at a restaurant near the university if there’s a time crunch.

“Hello parents!” Yoochun announced to all the adults seated in the dining room cheerfully ignoring Jaejoong scowling at the unwanted face.

“Yunnieee~!” Jaejoong yelled and Yunho speedwalked in behind Yoochun.

“Right here Boo.” Yunho gave Jaejoong a peck on her cheek and jogged around the table to sit on the chair opposite her while letting Junsu take his designated chair near Jaejoong. well, she does want him literally  in front of her.  

“Where were you?” Jaejoong demanded while silently giving Leeteuk and Yoona permission to serve her food.

Junsu was sent to fetch Kangin, Yoowhan and Seunggi just when Heechul waltzed in. she spent a better part of this joint dinner sulking fiercely at some odd part of the Kim residence because her daughter was blatantly ignoring her and demanding for Yunho.

It hurts when Yunho takes preference over your own mother.

“Just wrapping up stuff so I’m free this weekend.” Yunho tugged his mother’s arm so she would serve him too. Leeteuk though pretended to not notice as she fussed over Jaejoong. with a pout, Yunho served himself rice.

“Are you free? Can we go to that class on Saturday?” Jaejoong asked.

“What class?” Heechul asked. First thing she hears when she enters the room is her pregnant daughter talking of some class. Everyone else is also looking at Jaejoong to elaborate because really this is the girl who didn’t want to go to college and began her career right away.

“It’s a parenting class…just half a day.” Yunho answered instead. “for expectant parents.”

“We’ve been wanting to go for a while but Yunho’s been really busy. I want to be prepared for aegi.” Jaejoong continued.

“What do they teach in this class?” Kangin asked with slightly narrowed eyes. “How to be good parents?”

“How do you learn that in half a day?” Seunggi’s mouth twisted.

“No. no!” Jaejoong waved her hand to brush it off. “it’s normal stuff. How to change the diaper, bathe your baby, make the milk. Such stuff.”

“HAH!” Leeteuk’s loud scoff made Jaejoong flinch next to her. “In our days we had no classes to teach us that stuff. We had to learn it ourselves.”

“Probably why Joongie wore bedazzled diapers….” Hankyung said under his breath.

“True, true. We had no one to guide us. Parenting was always self-taught experience for us.” Park Eunhye said seriously.

“That explains a lot…” Yoochun thought to himself wondering if he’s such a crybaby by his mother’s self-taught ‘mollycoddling’ technique.

“The odd chance we didn’t know what to do, we always had our parents to rely on. Kangin’s mother was really helpful.” Leeteuk added.

“Lucky for you. We had no wise elders….” Yoona sighed.

“What is going on?” Jaejoong asked Yunho.

“Nothing…” Yunho waved it off, albeit sarcastically. “they’re just upset we opted to learn from early childhood experts instead of taking their grand ol’ wisdom.”

“Who you calling old!” Heechul threw an orange at Yunho. “and cut the crap about this class. You don’t need to go.” and the diva mother crossed her arms decisively.

“But Mama, I want to. I don’t know how to change a diaper.”

“I’ll teach you.”

“Mama, I’ve seen my baby pictures. You held my diaper up with your rhinestone belt.”

“It’s a fashion statement.”

“And if I can’t do anything at all?”

“Then you leave the kid to us.”

“That right there…” Hankyung gestured to the helicopter parents in the room, “is why Yunho and Jaejoong should take the class.”

“Sure, make us more redundant why don’t you.” Yoowhan sneered and huffed.

“Nobody’s getting redundant.” Hankyung spoke louder when he got Yunho cheering in the corner. “whether it’s good for them or not, let them decide. Let them make the decide their parenting style.”

Slowly, but reluctantly, the parents stood down. “You go daddy!” Jaejoong cheered.

“Go where?” Hankyung blinked.

“Fine. Go to your stupid class. See if I care.” Heechul said childishly.

“I still don’t think it’s going to be useful, but whatever.” Leeteuk huffed.

“Why don’t you all take the class too?” everyone looked at Junsu who suddenly spoke. They actually only realised she was there now since she was quiet the whole time and the attention was on Yunho and Jaejoong.

“Su, what did I ever do to you?” Yunho groaned but Junsu had a thoughtful look before she shook her head. “Nothing.”

“No, wait, wait, wait.” Leeteuk gesticulated wildly and pointed at Junsu. “you're suggesting we go to this thing. We, the ones who’ve been parents for more than two decades? All to have some prissy know-it-all with a fancy degree tell us to stick our elbow in the bath water?”

“You have to stick your elbow in the bathwater?” Yunho frowned and Jaejoong looked at Leeteuk curiously as well.

“It’s actually not a bad idea…” Yoochun rubbed his chin as if he’s the wise ol’ courtier. “it will be fun. Yun and Jae get to go to their class and you people can decide whether it’s good or not.”

“There’s a point.” Yunho thought, albeit a still fearful of the idea. “you people are going to nag at us even after the class.”

“So then all you people go to class and prove the modern parenting knowledge wrong.” Hankyung made shooing motions while returning to his abandoned food. “as long as I can enjoy my ballet in peace.”

“Actually daddy…. Both parents have to be in the class…” Jaejoong said apologetically. She knows her father loves watching the ballet as much as he dreads second-hand embarrassment the adults there are going to cause.

Hankyung cringed when he felt sharp manicured nails dig into his shoulder. “let’s get my bedazzling gun hubby.” Heechul gave a devilish smile that made Hankyung gulp.

“This is going to be fun.” Yoochun was enjoying this way too much that if it weren’t for the number of witnesses in that room, Yunho would have stabbed him with a butter knife.

~~~

“I have a feeling we’ll not get to see the end of the class.” Yunho grimaced as he helped Jaejoong sit on the chair.

“See the glass half full… we might at least get 20 minutes.” 20 minutes would be a long time but it is a 4 hour class and even 20 minutes is stretching it with what she knows will happen.

“I feel like I’m back in school.” Yunho wriggled in his seat happily remembering those backbencher days in school. Since college, he’s been sitting closest to the door so he can run off to Jaejoong.

“Would you go to a parenting class in school if there was?”

“Sure. I should suggest it to Jihoon hyung in fact. There’s already -ed but teens get pregnant anyway. So why not have a class to teach them how to handle the baby.”

“Handle…your choice of words….”

“! What are they doing?” Yunho squeaked pointing at the front of the class.

In the front, Kangin and Yoowhan are rearranging tables so ‘they can all be close to their friends’ as Leeteuk puts it. Hankyung is trying to make himself invisible in the wall while the other ladies are being social with the other couples present by giving out zero- calorie cookies.

Most parents there are quite young. Some aren’t even expecting a child yet, just coming here to be prepared. Jaejoong is among the two women there with advanced pregnancies the other woman being six months along and expecting twins.

So it makes sense why these oddly older people who they know are the backbencher couple’s family are trying to socialise with the other student couples. It’s awkward enough as it is.

“Okaaaay~!” a young woman entered with a huge box. She was slightly disturbed by Heechul giving her a onceover and it looked like Heechul didn’t approve. “Okay, Mr Jung, Mr Park, why don’t you leave the tables where they are and take your seats….” When Kangin looked ready to rebel she put on her sweetest smile, “Please.”

Behind, they could feel Jaejoong’s puppy dog eyes boring holes in their back so they complied.

The young teacher clapped her hands together excitedly. “So, welcome to all you parents… old and new…” she gave the old couples a glance apprehensively. “I’m Choi Sooyoung and let’s get this class started.” She did a cheer and fetched the box till Eunhye raised her hand. “yes?”

“Are you in highschool?” she asked and Yunho facepalmed at the back.

“Er…” Sooyoung was slightly taken aback by the question before she shook her head. “No, I just completed my masters in child psychology and I’ve studied early childhood development and pedagogy.”

“Seriously… they just give out anything to kids these days.” Leeteuk said to Eunhye ignoring Yunho’s indignant ‘Mom’ at the back.

“Uh..well…hehe…” Sooyoung tried to laugh it off. “Anyway, let’s distribute these robot babies now.”

“Uh, excuse me!” Heechul interrupted and gestured at the young couple in the back. “I already have a baby. She’s right there. Hi Joongie.” And Heechul waved at her daughter who in turn waved back but it looked like she wanted to cry.

“Uh…that’s nice…but we can’t put a diaper on her so…you’ll  have to do with these robot babies instead.” Sooyoung put a doll on Heechul and hankyung’s desk and before Heechul could protest at the ‘unfaboulousness’ of the baby, Hankyung took it.

She put a baby in front of each of the couples, two for the couple expecting twins. Sooyoung returned to the front of the class and began addressing her students. “So what you have right now are mechanical babies developed by some robotic geniuses for this training. Let me tell you, they can cry if they want to be fed or changed but don’t be afraid, we’re all here to learn. So let’s begin with the swaddling first. I’m going to demonstrate so watch carefully coz you all have to repeat it.”

Sooyoung then pulled out a blanket to show the parents step by step. With every move, she would lift the doll to show the class how it should look. She was almost on the second last fold until….

“A-HAH! I finished first, I finished first.” Eunhye waved her swaddled doll carelessly in the air and danced a bit. On the table next to them, Leeteuk-Kangin and Yoona-Seunggi are upset they lost the ‘race’.

“You cheated!” Leeteuk accused because that could be the only reason why they finished before the others.

“I didn’t cheat.” Eunhye huffed nudging her husband to say so