“Jae, date me!”

Jaejoong slammed the door behind and left the man who utterly nonsense in the harsh cold of night let the thick wood of door be barrier in between the two of them – just how much he built a thick wall in secure his heart to anyone.

Dating?

How much he has been hurt before just because of dating another man? Behind his cold façade, there is him, the helpless man who failed in love in so many ways.

Did the other man know how much he treasured a relationship and imagined it beyond till reaching an altar? Did he know that he only has one wounded and scarred heart which he has been locked under his warm mask?

Leaning against the door, Jaejoong slid down to the floor and bent his knees closer to his chest, crying in mess. In his small apartment, is where he always poured his heart out witnessed by emptiness and darkness of a small apartment room; another loneliness.

Denying his infatuation is another task that he couldn’t fathom with. How much longer he had to deny his heart, over a certain Shim Changmin, a crush of his love? Hadn’t courage any muster of strength to confess, he eyed that man from afar. Too far that he let another relationship to happen before his eyes.

Destroying a relationship for his sick kind of love was far from his plan. He knew how much was that hurt being left out in the middle of winter night and another phase of loneliness sipped in. He knew that. He was trying his best to not showing too much of adore expression never see a broken relationship to happen.

…and he was here.

Shim Changmin was here knocked on his door, asked him to date.

As so much his heart told him to give in for another person to come in fill the emptiness of his chambers of heart, he refused so much. His happiness today for dating a certain Shim Changmin, will that ever last longer than eternal? If he broke another soul’s heart out there, did he deserved the happiness over someone’s failure? Will karma even came and slapped him hard and left him with nothing?

Too much thing he scared of; why must he let another chance?

Knocking on the door finally calmed down; Shim Changmin gave up.

He let another chance go without give in for a try. How selfish he was yet he thought it’s the best he could come out with.

If he could grew adore and infatuate from a far before, why can’t he continue the same thing later? Why he needed more when he had enough?

In between the sobs and dried tears stained on his face, Jaejoong fall asleep while still leant on the door until the sunshine morning with fresh dews welcome him.

Stretching his limbs, Jaejoong pushed himself to stand and get ready for his morning jog. He needed more fresh air to breath. The daily problems are sickening, too suffocating till it felt like he has been choked by harsh reality.

With a pair of red sweatpants and plain white shirt, Jaejoong walked out from his apartment. Another shocked greet him when he met him sitting while leaning beside his door. It was cold last night.

Jaejoong crouched next to him. The Shim Changmin whom he always dreaming to s