Chapter 12

Sulli paced back & forth, eyes snapping with fury. In these few days, she had paced around so much a faint line was visible in her deep, red carpet which gave new meaning to the phrase ‘Wearing a path across the carpet’, “If it hadn’t been for stupid Paige on the phone, I would have had Jaejoong Oppa in my grasps now!” She peered out of the window into the pouring torrents of rain but she could hardly see eight feet in front of her, “Maybe it’s not too late?” Sulli took out her samsung galaxy s5 optimistically & quickly dialled Jaejoong’s number which she had memorized, of course. She tapped her foot impatiently, watching the buttons on her highly stylized cell phone light up until he answered.

“Hello?” His voice sounded hollow & forlorn. To her, it was masculine & y. Never did it occur to Sulli that it was the voice of a young man whose heart was on the verge of shattering.

“Oppa?” Sulli purred. There was no responses from the other end. Obviously, he didn’t recognize her voice or he just didn’t care, “It’s me, Sulli.” She heard Jaejoong’s sharp intake of breath.

“Sulli? Sulli, is Yuri home?” He asked urgently, hoping she had been sensible enough to head home.

Sulli pouted. She hated how he spoke of her cousin’s name in such gentle & soft tones, “Oppa, I don’t want to talk about Yuri. I want to talk about us.” Sulli lowered her voice to a breathy whisper that no guy in France could resists.

“Maybe later.” Jaejoong answered distractedly, without any clear idea what she had just said, “Sulli, Yuri ran off from the store this morning, do you have any idea where she might be?” His mind was submerged in thoughts for Yuri & Yuri alone.

However, the last part of Jaejoong’s sentence turned Sulli’s slowly mounting anger into appeasement, ‘Yuri? Gone? This is better than I hoped.’ “Oh, dear. I’m sorry, Oppa.” Sulli’s voice was as sweet & thick as syrup & as venomous as poison, “I should have told you. Yuri said she hated you. She…”

“Sulli, you are not helping & I’m in a hurry right now.” Jaejoong cut her off, before the girl could repeat what Yuri had said. He had just convinced himself it wasn’t true & having this repeating wasn’t making it easier for him to believe Yuri was innocent.

“But Oppa, now that she’s gone for.” Sulli stared frustratingly at the phone as she heard the dial tone. She chewed on her bottom violet pink lips, ‘Where is Yuri?’ She wondered in some confusion. Slowly, her hand formed into a fist, “It doesn’t matter where you are! I will find you before Oppa will!” Sulli hissed, shaking her fists & cracking her knuckles & grabbed her car keys, “Nobody takes what Choi Sulli wants!”

“Where is she?” Jaejoong was asking the same question over & over as he drove around a quiet business area at a shocking speed. Later on, he could only be glad no police cruisers were around. He deeply regretted the way he yelled at her & if he could turn back time, to the morning before, it would have turned out differently but time kept moving forward without waiting for anyone & Jaejoong was very well aware of this. Jaejoong knew he couldn’t save the past, what’s done is done & now, he can only concentrate on the future. Even as he drove past the suburb, every little thing reminded him of her. A willow tree was Yuri, holding her hands out to him, beckoning him to move forward. A mailbox was her, bending over a patch of flowers. The wind was Yuri’s mournful wail, accusing him, it seemed.

“Yuri, if only you would come back to me, I will admit it’s all my fault. I don’t know what got into me.” Jaejoong was beginning to think he was going insane & had just imagined the phone call that morning. Was it just that morning? Every minute of searching for her had felt like an eternity.

He turned a corner, hoping to see her, “Oh, Yuri. Where are you? You couldn’t have gone that far.” The wheels of his car skidded as he turned another corner & his heart leaped. There she was, running as if a mob was after her. Yuri’s hair whipped around her in the wind & her moss green v-neck jumpsuit were soaked & sticking to her like a second skin. Jaejoong would have found the way her wet clothes emphasized her curvaceous body extremely appealing if it hadn’t been for such a perilous situation. She slipped once but still, she ran. She ran, blind to where she was going; to what was going on around her. Jaejoong jumped out of the car.

“Yuri!” He yelled, over the wind. She kept running, totally oblivious of him. Jaejoong pursued her, sprinting faster than he ever did in his life, “Yuri, please, I’m sorry, I will never hurt you like that again.”

Suddenly, his heart stopped. Another car was speeding towards them & Yuri was still running, “Stop!” Jaejoong hollered automatically, hoping Yuri or the person driving the car could hear him. A flash of lightning illuminated the scene to a violent glow & he caught a glimpse of the driver. He suddenly realized with frightening clarity that she had no intention of stopping. It was Sulli. The phone call, he hadn’t been going crazy, that had been Sulli, too.

Jaejoong never stopped to think any further. His mind was focused on saving Yuri. He maybe able to escape death time after time but Yuri wasn’t immortal, what would he do if he lost her? Time seemed to have slowed down as Jaejoong ran towards Yuri & reached her just in time. He caught her around the waist & stopped her. She looked up, surprised.

“I love you, Kwon Yuri.” There was no time for more but that was enough. They both knew he had said it from the bottom of his heart. Every tone rang with loving sincerity. If those were indeed the last words he would ever utter, Jaejoong would never regret it. He pushed her out of the range of the oncoming car before the car hit him, full impact. Once again, Jaejoong felt the pain of dying that no one else had ever experienced. For a fraction of a second, Jaejoong existed in hell; every muscle screamed in agony & he felt like a millions of knives were stabbing into his body where the car had hit him. Flames of fire spread throughout his body from the spot where the car hit had him. He out.

“No!” A strange voice cried, as Yuri watched the flying car hit Jaejoong before her very eyes. It took her a few minutes to realize the strangled voice had been hers. She closed her eyes, hoping everything would go away, that Jaejoong would once again, be standing in front of her, smiling. Yuri opened her eyes again, when she heard the sound of screeching tires as the car braked, hoping, praying, but there was no Jaejoong standing in front of her. Horrified, she looked around, expecting to see blood & mangled body parts everywhere. There was none. Jaejoong was lying several feet away, a trickle of blood coming from his forehead where he had hit the pavement.

“Oppa.” Yuri ran towards him, the rain stinging her eyes. Or maybe it was the tears, Yuri couldn’t tell & she didn’t care. She flung herself down next to the young man, cradling him in her arms. Jaejoong was the marble white shade of death, contrasting sharply with the thin, red flow of blood.

“Oppa, oh my god, Oppa.”

Yuri whipped around & saw her cousin, Sulli, staring wide-eyed at the scene she had created, “Get away from him!” Yuri yelled, furious, stopping Sulli dead in her tracks. She had never been more frightened in her life.

“If you killed him.” Yuri couldn’t finish the last part of the sentence. It was too painful to think about it. Burying her face into Jaejoong’s soft hair, she let the tears come.

‘I love you, Kwon Yuri.’ She recalled him saying, his warm, soft eyes glowing with adoration, in that one crucial second before he sacrificed himself.

“Oppa. I love you, too.” It was the first time Yuri had said those words to anyone but her mother & she meant it. After all these months of bottling those words inside of her, Yuri gave in, “I love you, Jaejoong Oppa!” She yelled into the force of the wind, clutching him, hoping it wasn’t too late. It just couldn’t be too late.

Sobbing uncontrollably, Yuri kneeled there in the rain, holding him, the blood from Jaejoong’s wound slowly staining her jumpsuit a deep, blood red, “Oppa, wake up please? I’m sorry, I should have listened to what you had to say. If you die, I will never, ever forgive myself.” The pain of Jaejoong being taken away from her shattered her heart more than words ever could.

To the world, you maybe one person but to one person, you maybe the world. Jaejoong was her world. How was she supposed to live if her world was taken away?

Once again, Jaejoong found himself in that foggy, white nothingness. He winced as a wave of loneliness & desolation washed over him. Last time, he couldn’t have cared less about what happened to him. This time, he did. He wanted to go back to Yuri. Nothing in or out of the world mattered as much to him as she did.

“Good to see you again, little one.” That haunting feminine voice chimed out of nowhere, filling the air with vibration. The fog around him started to swirl a bit faster.

Resisting the temptation to cover his ear, Jaejoong raised his head, “Am I dead this time?” He asked bluntly, wanting to know the worst. God had always been against him, giving him hate when he wanted love, giving him life when he wanted death, why should this time be any different?

The voice laughed heartily, sounding more mortal than it ever did before, “Of course not. True love, you haven’t forgotten, have you? You are not entitled to die yet.”

Jaejoong’s mind raced back to Yuri, “I’m going to see her again.”

“But you are very close to your destination, maybe forever isn’t going to be so long after all.” The voice became gentle & Jaejoong was suddenly reminded of the voice that had told him Yuri was innocent. It had sounded so familiar & Jaejoong finally realized it was her, this immortal goddess.

“It was you.” He whispered hoarsely, looking around but seeing nothing but white mist, “You were the one that told me Yuri was innocent.”

A low chuckle answered him, shaking the earth he was standing on, “Yes, it was.”

“But...But why?” Jaejoong didn’t get this. Why would this goddess want to help him? Someone who wasn’t even good enough to get in heaven?

“Even the gods don’t like seeing people as helpless as you were. True, we rarely help them.” She added to Jaejoong’s unasked question. He waited for her to explain, for her to elaborate but she didn’t continue. The goddess paused & said, “You are very close, Jaejoong, very, very close. Don’t let this chance slip away from you. Remember, don’t let it slip.”

Jaejoong stood there, dumbfounded, until the white fog began to whirl about him, blinding him. The last thing Jaejoong heard was the soft laugh of that voice for the last time.

When Jaejoong felt the blinding whiteness begin to recede, he struggled to open his eyes. He blinked, looking around into the darkness that surrounded him. Slowly, the gentle whispering of the rain filled his ear & as his eyes became accustomed to the dark, he saw her. Yuri.

“Yuri?” He whispered hoarsely, wondering if he was dreaming. He became aware of her arms around him, of her tears, tears she had shed for him & sighed contently, happiness filling him with warmth that spread to every part of his body. That miniature sun in his heart was nurtured back to existence by the perfect moment. Slowly, in those few seconds, he reconstructed his shattered dreams. If this was a dream, Jaejoong wished for once that it could last forever.

“Jaejoong Oppa?” He watched Yuri’s eyes widen in shock as she whispered the sacred name uncertainly. He stayed silent, loving the way she said his name, “You are alright? Really?” Yuri looked exhausted but the fire came back into her eyes as she swallowed her sobs. She was shocked at this sudden return to life but was afraid that if she inquired any further, Jaejoong would slip away from her again. It was better to take what life gave her than question the decision of the heavens.

Jaejoong nodded, running a hand over her soft, pink cheeks, gently wiping away her tears, “I missed you.” He said softly, in a teasing tone to lighten up the mood.

A slight smile played over Yuri’s lips gently, “I missed you, too.” She whispered, her soft voice sounding almost musical.

They sat there, clasped in each other’s arms, basking in the joy no amount of freezing cold rain could wash away. The tears of heaven suddenly turned into tears of joy. This was their perfect moment.