Jinki stared at his bleak appearance in the bathroom mirror, taking in his blonde, tousled hair and red rimmed eyes with a sigh. He hadn’t slept properly for three days and he didn’t think he would sleep any more properly that day either. The time had finally come for the members of the culture committee and participants of the campaign to preview the ‘First Kiss’ video.

He’d rather eat a bowl of iron nails.

Although it might not have mattered since it felt like his stomach was full of them anyway, making it hard for him to eat or breathe properly.

But first, there was a party. Of course the culture committee would use any excuse they had to have a party. So they had set the time for the preview at midnight for the romance of it all (Jinki wanted to laugh scornfully) and the party was to be held from nine. Jinki loathed parties since could neither dance nor be properly social. He disliked it even more so now, as it was to be the prequel to his demise.

“Hyung!” Taemin knocked on the door to the bathroom and Jinki closed his eyes. “We need to go or we’ll be late!”

“Do I have to?” he sounded like a whiny four-year-old, meeting his own pleading orbs in the mirror. But really, one of his best friends who now hated him was definitely going to be there. He was also pretty sure a tall, dark haired, handsome young man he tried not to think about would too.

“Yes! You haven’t left the room ever since you fought with Kibum-Hyung and this is your chance to actually explain to him what happened! He’s not going to make a scene in a crowd!” Taemin reasoned.

Jinki tensed and gripped the edge of the sink so hard his knuckles whitened, the nails in his stomach shifting painfully.

But the younger was right. This was his chance to set everything straight again. He just needed to find the blonde and explain. It couldn’t be that hard.

He let go of the sink and opened the bathroom door reluctantly, letting himself be dragged away by Taemin to the main building, where the music of the party could be heard all the way to the entrance hall. He started fiddling with his hands nervously as the distance to the auditorium lessened and the music grew louder, his insides doing some sort of circus act and something lodging itself in his throat.

“Just stay calm,” his black haired friend advised and Jinki swallowed around the lump, nodding weakly while trying not to mind the now nail-snake mutants that now moved around in his stomach.

They entered the room and were met by a mass of people with drinks in their hands, moving to the music and talking excitedly. He recognised some faces as his classmates while most of the others he had never seen before. But he didn’t care about them as much, scanning the crowd for a familiar blonde head while biting his lip nervously. Taemin looked around too, absently picking at the hem of his shirt in a nervous habit of his.

“Let’s go get a drink first,” he shouted over the music and pointed towards the help-yourself drink table. Usually Jinki wouldn’t really drink (since he didn’t really like alcohol) but this time he nodded. He could use something to calm his nerves.

Except his nerves became even more frazzled when they arrived at the table and found Kibum standing there, fixing the cups and bottles. Taemin grabbed Jinki's hand as he made to turn and walk away and pulled him towards their friend determinedly.

“Uh, hi Hyung,” the boy greeted loudly but tentatively and the blonde looked up at him, his eyes glancing so quickly at Jinki he wasn’t even sure the other had looked at him at all.

“Hi Taemin!” he shouted back. “You took a while!”

“Well, yeah, we kind of-” Taemin gestured to him and Jinki.

“Have you seen Jonghyun, by the way?” Kibum interrupted him, keeping his eyes trained on the youngest.

“No…” he said slowly and nudged Jinki in the ribs with his elbow. He jumped slightly, sending the boy a small glare before taking a deep breath and opening his mouth.

“Kibum, I-”

“Huh, that’s too bad!” the blonde continued talking to Taemin as if he hadn’t spoken. He didn’t even look at him. “He has the extra cups and I need them. If you see him, tell him that!” Then he disappeared, not even once looking at Jinki.

“Well, that went well,” Taemin said sarcastically before sighing and shaking his head. “Let’s give him some tim- HEY WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!”

Jinki had just taken the biggest cup he could find and filled it to four fifths with vodka and the rest coke. Taemin tried to grab it from him, but the older turned his back on him and chugged half of the drink down, making a grimace.

“Hyung, I know you can hold your alcohol well, but even you can’t be fine with that!” the boy complained.

Jinki merely shrugged and downed the remnants of the cup. Taemin looked like he wanted to continue scolding him but suddenly his eyes widened and his expression turned horrified. The older frowned at him and turned to see what he was looking at.

“NO!” Taemin yelled, grabbing his arms and trying to stop him from turning. He was too slow though, and Jinki felt his heart break into million tiny pieces.

Minho had arrived. And he hadn’t even looked around the room for Jinki (although, admittedly he didn’t know he was part of the campaign). Instead he had gone straight up to Kibum, who smiled at him with a love struck expression. Jinki saw the taller smile back, even if slightly forced, and the blonde grabbed his hand, interlacing their fingers.

Jinki looked down at his own almost as if in confusion, remembering a time when he had held Minho's hand, while Taemin watched him worriedly.

“I need more,” he choked out, grabbing the bottle of vodka. The boy dragged his hands over his face tiredly, groaning.

After two more drinks, Jinki retreated to a corner of the room (still close to the drink table), having sent the boy away to some of his classmates, although he came to check up on him from time to time. He tried not to, but somehow his eyes always seemed to find Kibum and Minho, who were still holding hands, the blonde dragging the taller around to talk to all different kinds of people. At that moment he felt so completely destroyed. He was glad Kibum finally had the most of Minho's interest but at the same time he was falling apart because of it.

“Hyung, drinking yourself senseless won’t solve anything,” Taemin chastised him when he came over to check on him for the umpteenth time and saw him finishing his sixth cup of mostly vodka. The vodka business would make a fortune out of him if this continued.

“You know Taemin, according to chemistry, alcohol is a solution so I would beg to differ,” Jinki muttered, barely able to speak properly, while keeping his eyes on Kibum and Minho’s intertwined hands.

The boy sighed. “You’re so going to regret those words, Hyung.”

“Right now I’m not regretting it though,” he said, irritated. “So go bother someone who cares!”

The boy gave him a dissatisfied scowl and stomped away, leaving him to feel miserable and guilty. Great.

He let out a small, frustrated sound that sounded dangerously close to a sob and filled up his cup again.

It took him three more drinks before the world became blurry around the edges and his problems didn’t seem as bad as he previously had thought. He even laughed when he saw Kibum lean up and place a shy kiss on Minho's cheek, the taller’s facial expression shocked and indecisive.  It looked hilarious. Jinki was sure the other would have returned the favour if Jonghyun had not come and taken the blonde’s attention away. He felt a little better seeing the somewhat relieved expression on Minho's face and it made him laugh again.

It must have somehow been a bit too loud because the taller’s head snapped in his direction and his eyes widened in surprise. He shifted in place hesitantly and suddenly Jinki wanted nothing more than to be there. With him.

So he did the only logical thing; pushing away from the wall he was leaning against and wobbling over to the one he loved. He giggled to himself. That’s right, he loved Minho. Why had he never thought about that before? He wondered as he stumbled forward and almost fell into the other’s arms.

“Heeeeey,” Jinki slurred as Minho caught him. “Hey, yooouuu…”

“Hyung, are you drunk?” he asked incredulously. Jinki just giggled happily, his body tingling and the world suddenly shining pink. Minho looked down at him worriedly. “Let’s get you to the bedroom,” he said slightly breathless, struggling to keep the other from sliding to the floor. “You shouldn’t be allowed to drink this much.”

Jinki giggled again. “But it feels soooooo niiiiiiiiceeeeee.”

"Let's get you to your room," Minho  said with a sigh and started manoeuvring them through the mass of people and out the door, Jinki giggling softly the entire way.

They had to stop in the entryway for the taller to catch his breath and rest. He steered the other towards a bench and sat him down on it. Jinki complied willingly, but only because he had a grip on the front of Minho's shirt and could pull him down as well, which ended up with him on his back and the taller on top of him.

“H-hyung!” his wide eyes grew even wider as Jinki suddenly glared up at him.

“You’re terrible…” he mumbled. “Letting other people kiss you…”

“Hyung,” the other said again and tried to get up, but Jinki had his shirt in an iron grip, “what are you talking about?”

“You shouldn’t kiss them either,” he continued, ignoring the warning bells going off in the back of his head. “The only one you’re supposed to kiss is me!”

Minho stared at him incredulously, opening his mouth to say something but Jinki didn’t want to hear him talk, so he lifted his head up and erased the small space between their lips, effectively shutting him up. The other froze for a moment and he could feel his confusion through the kiss. But then something seemed to click inside him and he lifted his hands up to cup Jinki’s face, deepening their kiss. Jinki let out a content hum as Minho gently pressed their lips together and his hands landed on the other’s waist, pulling him down closer.

It was the most amazing thing he had ever experienced. The taller let one of his hands travel down to grab Jinki's hip, the other his hair lovingly. Jinki's chest swelled with love and he lifted his arms up to put around Minho's shoulders, hugging him as close as he could.

“Jinki,” the taller whispered against his lips in-between a kiss and he hummed again.

When Minho moved his lips away to kiss his cheek, however, Jinki’s mind cleared slightly and panic struck him. This was Kibum’s soon to be boyfriend. And he was making out with him. This was not supposed to happen. This was not according to plan.

Jinki mustered all the strength and willpower he had in him and pushed the other off, even though his mind and body screamed to just continue to drown himself in the existence that was Minho. He mumbled an embarrassed ‘sorry’ before slinking out from underneath the other and bolting out the doors, running on shaky legs back to his dorm where he dove under his covers, trying his best not to think or cry or even breathe.

A/N: I haven't looked through this, but I'm giving it to you because I'm nice hehe xD I'm gonna check it later for errors and wordthingies and stuff like that -.-

I hope you liked this! And, well, Jinki kissed him!!!! How awesome is that!?!?!?!?! But he still chickened out in the end *sigh*

There aren't a lot of chapters left, to be honest...

I love you all!

Bye~! <3