Four In The Morning

I woke up a few hours after, though without the realization that I had fallen asleep. There was a bell that had constantly gone off in my head—an irritable dinging. Maybe it wasn't even in my head because as I slowly chose to regain consciousness, I took note of the familiar sound of my doorbell announcing that someone was at the door. I scoffed, checking the clock  that said it was 4 in the morning. Four in the morning. Whoever was at my damn door, it better be important.   

Throwing my legs over the bed and standing, I wondered if it was my neighbor who got their Frisbee stuck on my backyard again and came by to ask if I could bring it back. Grabbing my phone from on top of the nightstand, I had to rub my eyes before seeing the number of notifications I had missed.

(6) missed calls from Luhan♡

Six calls in a row? What could have been so urgent? The sound of the doorbell going off increased in volume as I reached the bottom of the stairs. I groaned, wishing for my visitor to stop hitting the button already because I was coming. I unlocked the door and swung it open, ready to complain. I comprehended the person at my door to be Luhan and my thoughts from earlier were forgotten. The same face, the same eyes, the same everything. It was definitely him.

He lifted a finger from abusing the doorbell and let out a loud exhale upon seeing that I had finally responded. Luhan looked exhausted—hair disheveled and the top buttons on his dress shirt were undone to suffocate him less. It looked like he hadn't gotten any sleep, though something told me that was actually the case.

I held my phone in the air. "I was about to call you back."

He wearily tossed accusing looks at me. "You! Why are you such a heavy sleeper? Couldn't you hear my calls?"

"It was on vibrate," I defended myself. Plus, it was four in the morning. I was practically dead in my sleep. I stepped back to allow him room to enter, my half-unconscious senses still not processing everything fully. "Come in. Why are you here? Did something happen?" I hadn't expected to see him in a while. Maybe not even until we had work on Monday if he even bothered to show up after the dispute he was going through.

The last time I’ve spoken to him… was on the phone, I remembered. I suddenly recalled everything we had talked about, and all the bitter feelings I had and wished that I didn’t remember anything. It made me wonder what he was doing in front of my door at that hour. Did he want to break us up as soon as possible? Did he want to be with Mei Li so soon that he couldn’t wait to tell me anymore?  

I was frozen on the spot for a while, waiting for him to just explain everything.

Luhan broke into a smile that contrasted against how tired he looked. He stepped foot inside, rubbing his shoes against the mat from dirt he might be bringing in. The cold air that seeped from the door sent me a chill.

"I should have brought flowers or something," Luhan said.

He wasn't making sense. Or was it just me that was functioning on whatever little energy I had left? "What do you need flowers for?"

Without the explanation I wanted, Luhan closed the space between us quickly. He kissed me, his cold hands holding my face. Luhan moved his lips like we only had a few moments to share with ourselves—panicked and rushed. My eyes fluttered shut instinctively and I reached to return the favor. Fingers tangling in his hair, I knew he was real. I wasn’t dreaming and still asleep. One of his hands travelled to my back to press our bodies closer to each other and I clutched on to him by his neck and shoulders. Luhan pulled away to breathe for a fraction of a second before he continued to kiss me again with the same raw passion.

I felt the emotions he was trying to convey—the worry, the apologies, but most of all the relief that I was fine. Suddenly I felt so stupid for even doubting his feelings for a moment. There was nothing to worry about. Luhan being here—just before dawn and ignoring the fact that he hadn't had a wink of sleep—it was the reassurance I needed. He found a way to me after all. Luhan just proved that I was worried about nothing.

We separated, our heavy breaths mixing from the heat of the moment. Luhan pressed his forehead on mine, speaking quietly. "I love you."

"I love you too," I breathed. People always said that sometimes there weren't words to explain everything. I hadn't understood what that really meant until that moment. I was honest it at least. With all my being, I was. I hoped he knew that. "I don't know how long it's been, but I missed you."

Luhan pulled me in a hug, my head just against his shoulder. Tightly lacing my arms around him, I caught sight of his car that was sloppily parked in front of the house, half of it on the sidewalk and the other half only on the actual driveway. He had rushed to my address like he was on a race. Despite the bliss I might have had for a while, I was reminded of reality and the joy was gone as fast as it had come. Life was cruel like that.

"Isn't Mei Li still at your place? What happened to her?"

Luhan had his nose buried in my hair. "Can we forget about the whole mess for a while? Even for just ten minutes?" He leaned back to look me directly in the eyes, begging. "Please?"

I nodded stiffly.

"Get a sweater. I'm taking us somewhere."

Without questioning him and forgetting about returning to sleep, I turned to the coat closet behind the door and pulled out the first jacket that I had gotten my hands on. Flinging it over my shoulders and poking my arms through, I slipped on shoes at the same time. Looking down at myself with my t-shirt and sweats that I wore to bed, I figured it wouldn't matter. After locking the house, Luhan hastily led me to the car with me having to resist making fun of the way he had parked.

"Where are we going?" I asked. Luhan was on the road again after I fastened my seatbelt over myself.

"I'm not really sure." He made a left at a curb beside a Seven-Eleven. "Everything I'm doing right now is spontaneous, to be honest. I’m not thinking."

I eyed him sideways. "Are you on drugs?"

Luhan laughed at my accusation.

"Because it would really be helpful to me, as a passenger, to know if the driver was on drugs."

"Idiot, I'm not on drugs!" He moved my way to elbow me in the arm.

"I know. I was just testing you." Covering my mouth with a hand, I yawned into my palm. Leaning my head beside the window, I chose a more comfortable position to sit at my run-down state.

"Sorry I had to wake you up like this," he said after noticing that I had yawned, though it was plain to see that he was the one that needed sleep the most between our tired eyes. "But I don't know. I guess I just... needed you. I sound like a sappy romance movie, but really I just felt like I needed to see you." I thought I saw his cheeks flash a pink tinge at his little confession.

I couldn't help but smile and turned until I could see him. "I don't think I've ever in my life been this excited at four in the morning. Congratulations."

He grinned, sparing me a glance in the middle of just moving the car ahead at the beginning of a green light. "You