Chapter 7: The desicion

***

Jaejoong was determined. Tonight, he would put an end to everything and find the reason that caused the strong confusion from his feelings. It had been bothered him for days now. He didn't even step out from his comfort zone since he learnt the truth, that he was being fooled all this time. It was always like that and now, he felt so pathetic than he had ever felt before.

Putting on the outfit that was meant to be donned for tonight's event, Jaejoong took a deep breath before he walked out from his small apartment - determined to make a new change of his life. Not matter how harsh the outcome might be, he had been ready for this. After all, it wasn't the first time he had been in such predicament; always being looked at disgustingly due to his preference and used to the insults.

Nonetheless, his legs still trembled slightly once the cab dropped him in front of the big mansion that stood majestically in the middle of the elite area in Gangnam. The luxurious sight of the house and the grand event that was being held inside had almost making him retreat his plan to confront the truth.

But, running away won't solve everything and get rid the heaviness that was building up in his chest. And he knew, he needed to brace himself up no matter what, so that he can really move on and get back to the normal life that he used to live in.

"I've to do this..." He mumbled to himself and coerced his legs walking toward the big entrance.

There was a few people sitting near the water fountain before the entrance, ogling at his way as he walked past them. He tried to ignore those uncomfortable scrutinizing gaze.

'Why are they looking at me like that? Is my very existence is already an eyesore here.' He thought as he had no self-awareness of how he looked right now; a kind of look that could easily steal people attention and resist from not staring.

He speeded his pace, hoping there would be a room inside for him to calm down a little. But what he found was a larger crowd of people already filled the huge hall.

He gasped silently before a voice of someone started speak up, hushed the murmuring from all the guests. He turned around and stared unblinkingly at the older man that had just taken the podium. The man had a very familiar look with someone he knew and it didn't take a genius to tell who was the person on the stage was. He resembled so much as Jung Yunho. The way he greeted and delivered his speech confidently and the posture of his standing like he conquered the world, not to mention the same intimidating aura that lingering around him.

'So that's his grandfather...' Jaejoong thought before his eyes caught the sight of his lover near the stage.

Even he had already known the truth; it still affected him when he saw the unwanted sight with his own eyes. His heart still throbbed at the sight of Siwon smiling while the man chatted with one of the guest, one hand circling around the waist of the girt next to him. Obviously, indicating that was his partner for the night or... would be in the future.

Jaejoong took a deep breath before he slowly, arranging his step toward the man's direction. His eyes just fixed on his lover as he kept walking with heart surging by a lot of emotions, but mind was still in a strong determination. He didn't even noticed the waitress that came from his rear with a tray of drinks and accidentally, bumped into him, at once brought him to fall in the most humiliating way in his life.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" The lady bowed apologetically in panicked upon saw the guest had his expensive attire tainted with the red wine from the shattering glasses.

Jaejoong stood up slowly and brought his face to look up. As he expected, all eyes in the hall were already focused on him. With his head somewhat downcast he looked around the hall, searching back the face of his lover and there, he found him. Their eyes met.

Siwon had a shocked expression, clearly shown he didn't expected his presence and almost quickly, the man averted his eyes elsewhere.

At that precise moment, Jaejoong get his answer as he felt his heart shattered into pieces once again. The guy who promised to stand by his side no matter how the others might look at them and will not ashamed with their love, finally, he had shown his true colours when this circumstance happened. He was being abandoned and insignificance to him. The little hope he had to patch the things in a good way and move to build a normal life was seemingly impossible. No matter how much he prepared, it still hurt him greatly.

Jaejoong hoped he could sink onto the shadows at the moment, being invisible to everyone again. But it was too late when that voice approached him.

"Are you okay, young man?"

He looked up and turned mute upon saw the elder Jung was already stood before him with a curious look.

"May I know who are you and who invited you here? Since I’ve never seen you before." The older man asked.

A spasm of anxious nerves shot from his stomach through his chest. Jaejoong felt his hands started sweating, the strong aura emitting from the elder had already made him paralyzed to the spot. His head told him to blurt out that one name and spit the truth. But his mouth seemed being sealed and his body already trembled. He glanced once again at Siwon, but the man still avoided his eyes. He felt so pathetic, still seeking the man's help at this moment - to believe the man would at least still care about him.

Jaejoong jerked slightly as a warmth hand of someone placed on his right shoulder.

"Jaejoong..."

He turned and was greeted by the sight of Jung Yunho smiling at him warmly.

"Finally, you came..." The man said as he stood beside him.

Jaejoong didn't understand at how just a mere sight of the man's presence had able to abate all his nervousness in a sudden gush.

"Grandpa, this is Kim Jaejoong. I'm the one who invited him here." Yunho turned to face his grandfather.

"Your friend? Why I haven't seen him before?" The older man asked again while give a quick glance at Changmin and the other two of his grandson's friends that he had known the younger man only had; since he knew how introvert his grandson was.

"I never have a chance to introduce him to you yet. He is actually someone special to me."

Jaejoong stared at the man beside him, looking perplexed.

'Since when did I become his special friend? Isn’t he had strongly suggested we should go our own ways once all this thing ended.' Jaejoong wondered as he felt the same jumbled feelings again upon seen the face of the young chaebol who appeared out of nowhere and stood up for him.

"Someone special?" The grandfather quirked his eyebrow and glanced at Changmin again, who currently stood behind Yunho with a nervous look. He flashed a knowing smile.

"Then, I believe your friend is feeling uncomfortable right now. So why don't you take him to the guest room and give him a new change of cloth."

Yunho stared at his grandfather in perplexed. It was first time he saw the softened side of his grandfather, usually the man would only wear a strict and serious expression on his face.

"Then, excuse us." Yunho said shortly, agreed it was the best to take Jaejoong escape from the crowd. Knowing there were a lot of eager eyes had been checking up the beautiful male, he could felt his inside was burning with jealousy.

He tugged Jaejoong's hand and dragged the smaller man to follow him. Jaejoong that was still looking baffled by the sudden turn out of event followed Yunho's lead without a word.

***

Jaejoong looked lost as Yunho walked him upstairs to a huge bedroom, away from those uncomfortable stares. The man passed a new branded shirt to him and without a word he left the room, allowing him to change his cloth comfortably. Jaejoong was glad for that, since he still didn't know how to face Yunho right now. At least, he had some time to compose himself.

After finished changing, he settled himself down on the white coach at the center of the room, facing the wide glass sliding door to the balcony. He just leaned his head against the couch and closed his eyes, savoring the calmness that slowly came to him before he flinched, as he felt a glass of cold water touched the side of his cheek.

Jaejoong’s eyes snapped open and found Yunho was sitting before him.

"Drink it. It will calm you down a bit." The man extended a glass of drink to him.

'When did he enter the room back?' Jaejoong wondered as appear out of nowhere was the man's ability?

Lifting up the glass to his lips, he finished the drink in one go before put it down on the small table near him. He then remained silence as aware of those sharp eyes of Jung Yunho were currently staring at him. It was enough to bring back the nervousness that had just subsided. He didn't know how to start the conversation with the man after he run away from the other's office few days ago and had rejected all of the man’s call and visit ever since. It was first time he felt awkward being alone with Yunho. It was another level of nervousness due to different reason now. So much avoiding the person; now he had nowhere to escape from the man anymore.

"Why are you here?"

"Huh?" Jaejoong finally lifted up his face upon heard the sudden-cold question.

"Why?" Yunho fixed his eyes on the smaller man before him.

Jaejoong felt shiver run down his spine by the sudden change of expression on the man's face. He seemed look angry for unknown reason. Just a moment ago the man stood up for him, and was smiling warmly in front of his grandfather, making him felt secured by his presence.

"I... I'm just doing what I feel right to do."

"What... Are you an idiot?"

"Huh?"

"Seriously, you are just going to humiliate yourself in front of everyone for the sake of getting him back?!"

Jaejoong flinched by the sudden outburst from the man.

"Why are you so mad? Wasn't it what I should do from the start?"

"Ugh, even so you should at least store your pride! Don't be so gullible, always following the other’s wishes and neglect your own feeling." Yunho yelled.

Jaejoong startled as it was first time the man looked so angry at him. He was really confused of what the reason that irked the man and made him looking so mad.

"Then, I'm sorry if I've misread your plan. I thought this is what you wanted."

Jaejoong stood up from the couch immediately, as he felt the stabbing pain in his chest. Maybe, what he did was really wrong. He shouldn't come here after all.

He was about to walk away when Yunho grabbed his hand, making him stopped abruptly.

"What are you saying? What do you meant by what I wanted?" Yunho asked as he turned the other to face him back.

Jaejoong looked down, avoiding from looking straight in Yunho's face. "Forget it. It's not important anymore. After all, we will never meet again. I'm going home..."

"Don't just cut the conversation like that. Answer me!"

"I said it's not important anymore. Now, let me go!"

"I won't let you go until you explain to me the reason why are you doing this?" Yunho said through his gritted teeth, feeling irritated by the man's refusal to answer the important question when the matter was getting irreversibly serious.

"Can we just stop it already and please... let me go!" Jaejoong tried to pull his hand free from Yunho's grip, but the other just tugged his hand, bringing him even closer.

Jaejoong gasped as he almost stumbled forward. He looked up at Yunho in infuriated.

Yunho was taken aback once he caught the other's eyes were b with tears as they were in a close proximity.

"Why are you crying?" He asked with a voice laden in a new rising of anger; for some reason.

"I'm not crying." Jaejoong turned his head away as he brushed off his tears immediately.

"You are."

"I am not!" Jaejoong raised his voice unconsciously, as he also began to lose his temper.

"It's obvious that you are!"

"Even if I cry it's not your business, so don't bother!"

"Of course it bothers me when you are crying in front of me!"

"So don't look at me!"

"How can I not look at you when you are just in front of me!"

They were now started shouting at each other. Both were in a ragged breath, panti