Chapter 6: Opening Up

This is just the start, but I know that we will become even closer and more united as time goes by.

We will be the best.

KRYSTAL POV

“Krystal! I still cannot get why you need to add neun/eun to the subject of the sentence. Why can’t you just simply say ‘Na yeoja yeyo’ (I a woman)? Amber asked in confusion.

I laughed at Amber’s distressed tone and scrunched face. She’s so adorable when she’s confused or troubled.

“’Cause Amber, neun/eun are particles that needs to be placed after a word to indicate that it is a subject. That’s the rule. So you cannot say ‘Na yeoja yeyo’, you should say, ‘Naneun yeoja yeyo’ okay?” I ruffled her hair in amusement.

She wrote something on her notebook, probably my words in verbatim. I one time that she won’t learn anything if she memorizes everything I say word for word; but she argued that it’s how she learns. I was surprised to see that she really does pick-up fast and only in a matter of days, she has made a big improvement in her Korean. Even I did not learn Korean that fast at first.

Just two weeks ago, Amber could not communicate in Korean at all. Now, she can converse in broken Korean to me, Jinri and Sun-young. Even the other members were surprised at how fast she could pick-up the lessons. I almost blurted that it was all because of my help; but I stopped myself. It will only cause unnecessary issues.

“…so you just write this after this, right?” asked Amber, disrupting me from my thoughts.

I looked at her notes and nodded. “Yeah, that’s right. You really are getting this quite fast, huh?” I teased.

“Of course! If I want to succeed in Korea, I need to master the language first. And I wouldn’t learn this fast if it wasn’t for you, Krystal. So, thank you.” She angled her body to look me in the eyes.

Her clear dark brown eyes bore into mine in undeniable sincerity. I can’t seem to avert my gaze from her eyes, and I don’t know how long we sat on her bed looking in each other’s. A sudden distant tune made us spring apart in surprise. It was Amber’s phone, ringing loudly in the closed room.

“Wei?” she answered the phone.

She’s talking in Chinese, why would she do that? Who’s she talking to? I’m so curious I was about to mouth to her who it was when she said. “Wǒ hěn hǎo, māmā. (I’m fine, mom)”

Oh, it was her mother. The weight on my heart was suddenly lifted. I watched Amber pace the room as she talked to her mother, with a permanent smile plastered on her face.

“Shì de, māmā. Bùyào tài dānxīn...Hǎo ba, wǒ huì hǎohǎo zhàogù. (Yes, mom. Don’t worry too much. Okay, I’ll take care)” Amber replied after a long pause.

She suddenly threw her head back and laughed. Her mom must have said something ridiculous to have earned that laugh from Amber. She listened for a few minutes after that and replied, “Shì de, shì de, wǒ bǎozhèng wǒ huì zhàogù hǎo, māmā. Wǒ ye ài nǐ de…Bai bai (Yes, yes, I promise I’ll take care, mom. I love you, too. Bye bye!)”

She was still laughing as she put her phone down on the table. It’s so good to see her laugh so carefree. I was suddenly stricken with desire to come see my mom too.

“That, was my mom. She’s always nagging about everything. Telling me to eat properly and sleep early. Now I miss her nosiness.” Amber sat back at the bed and eagerly got back to doing her Korean assignments.

I got up and excused myself for a moment to go to the loo. When I got back in the room, I was surprised to see Amber lying face down and sleeping on the stack of papers on her bed. I laughed and pried the papers from underneath her.

“Nicole…” I heard Amber mumble as I was putting the last stack of papers on her desk.

Who in the world is Nicole? Why does Amber keep calling her name? I was beyond curious and a little jealous. And before I woke up Amber to ask who Nicole was, I stormed out of the room and locked myself in my room.

This is so frustrating! Why do I care who Nicole is? It’s not my business for ’s sake!

AMBER POV

I woke up way before my alarm went off. It was only 3:30 in the morning and I’m supposed to get up at 5:30. I tried getting back to sleep, but I can’t. The same face keeps on haunting my dreams – Nicole’s.

After she was gone, I always dreamt of her a few days before her birthday. It was as if she was sending me a reminder that I should still celebrate even if she’s not with me. I do celebrate, but only by myself. I would buy a small carrot cake and put a lone candle on it, sing her a happy birthday and blow the candle for her. It was a routine, a celebration and commemoration of Nicole’s joys and sorrows.

This will be the third year I will be celebrating Nicole’s birthday without her. I have 3 days left before the actual date but I could already feel the weight of sadness in my heart.

I got up and went to the kitchen to find something to drink, cool down my nerves and maybe go back to sleep. On my way to the kitchen, I saw that the light on Krystal’s room as still on. I knocked lightly, not wanting to wake her if ever she was sleeping.

She answered the door after a few seconds. She seemed to not be sleeping, in fact, she looked too wide awake for someone who was supposed to be cranky this early in the morning.

“Hey, Amber. You’re up early.” She said softly.

“Yeah, I woke and couldn’t go back to sleep. You, why are you up?” I asked.

“Oh, I couldn’t sleep. Homesick, I guess. Come in, let’s talk inside, okay?” Krystal opened the door and led me to sit on her bed.

I sat beside her on the big bed. It was my first time coming in her room. It basically the same size as mine but she has decorated it with a girly flourish. I saw pictures of her family and friends and some of our group’s training photos.

“So…” I started.

“Ummm…what do you want to do till morning?” Krystal asked awkwardly.

“We could tell ghost stories to each other…” Amber said, wagging her eyebrows teasingly.

“Yeah, right. And I’ll probably hide under my blanket ‘til the end of next week.” She laughed.

“You’re that scared, huh?” I said.

It was quiet for a moment. The air stagnant between us, when I suddenly shouted, “BOO!”

She gave a high-pitched shriek and fell on the bed. She clutched her pillow to her face and squirmed away from me.

I burst out laughing and fell on my back on Krystal’s bed. One moment I was laughing, the next moment, I felt a pillow banging on my head, repeatedly.

“Krystal! Krystal! Stop, stop.” I said, still laughing loudly.

“No! You should pay for what you did!” She vehemently replied.

She gave me an evil smile and continued whacking my brains out. I shielded my face with my arms and tried, but failed, to catch the banging pillow. A few tries later, I finally caught it, it was not the pillow, but Krystal’s upper arms. I pushed her down on the bed and moved on top of her.

“Hey, hey, hey. Stop. I won’t do it again, okay?” I looked down on her pleadingly.

She averted her glance and looked sideways, “Okay,” she said.

I released her from my grasp and sat back on the bed. The bed was suddenly on my back as Krystal pushed me and moved on top of me, hands on my shoulders. “Gotcha,” she said.

“Why? What did I do now?” I asked.

“Payback.” She smirked, looking down on me.

“I swear I won’t startle you again. What more payback to you want?” I innocently looked at her eyes.

“I’ll only let up if you tell me about Nicole.” Her tone had a seriousness to it that I nodded in agreement, before I could think about it.

“Promise?” she asked.

“Promise. I’ll tell you all about her. As soon as you let me up.” I squirmed and she released me instantly to sit up.

“Okay. Who is Nicole, Amber?” Krystal asked, sitting cross-legged on the bed, facing me.

“I guess you got curious about Nicole because I kept repeating her name in my sleep these past few days, haven’t I?” I asked Krystal.

“I’m really sorry if I offended you by asking. It’s not that important. If you don’t want to tell me about her, it’s okay.” She said shyly.

“No, it’s okay. I guess it’s finally time to share this with someone. Maybe telling them to you will finally free me from the past.” I started.

“Okay…” Krystal urged.

“Nicole was my first love. And she died because of me. My reason for coming to Korea was partly to escape my grief.”