MY Shin Hye,

(MY, got that? MY, meaning mine. Just in case you forgot, you brat. You totally do not deserve a dearest right now.)

You think I didn’t notice how you gave me the letter AFTER you had spent all that time reunioning with …that man? Wearing …THAT dress? Do you want me to wrap you in a nun's garb from now on? You stole several of my coats and jackets and scarves and you didn't even think of wearing one of them with THAT dress. You should've used the "I <3 Kim Tan" shirt along with our favorite pink, fluffy cardigan instead! Hmf.

And to think I was feeling extra guilty for being coerced to playing a staring game with one of those SNSD girls (don’t ask me who, they all look the same to me). I’m quite upset right now, in case you did not notice (which you totally aren’t since you are giggling with stupid Woo Bin, HE'S NOT THAT FUNNY. STOP LAUGHING! WHY IS HE HERE ANYWAY?).

Oh by the way, I ran into Omoni, (yours) and we decided that the right time for us (you and me, not me and her) to tie the knot would be the end of the month. My mom agrees actually. She's been nagging about it from that time she found out you're my Cha Eun Sang. It seems that you're the number one choice as a daughter in law for all mums out there. Lucky, lucky me. Hee.

Oh, why the end of this month, you ask? That's because I'm enlisting a month after that. Are you shock? Don't be. I want to get it over with ASAP so I can come back to you just as fast. I don't plan to leave you as a single woman and have horrible second thoughts about our relationship, while I go toiling in the army. There's a pool of idols and actors just waiting for that chance and I'm never, EVER going to let you go. Just accept that you're stuck, with awesome me. Like forever.

My Agency? Why should I worry about them? My president's been married. Twice. How can he deny me my God given right to live in peace and happiness with the woman I love? How? Actually, I don’t think they even care now. They've got enough on their plate with several newbies scandals. (And you thought most of them was so sweet and innocent. HAH!)

I told Omoni that I was quite willing to give her grandkids as soon as we're wed. More than willing, y'know that. Hurr.

I also sorta told her that I DID try doing funny, adult stuffs with you but you're just too good in rebuffing my advances. Like an iron castle. With spikes. All over. See? You really have to take responsibility for me now as I've just proudly confessed to your mum that I tried defiling you every chance I get. It's a good thing though that your Appa isn't around at that time. I would've been totally smashed in and left for dead.

Come on, brat. Marry me soon. Please?

And how come you only told me you love me once when I said it again and again and again. (Again and again!) I love you.

Seriously though, I have something I wanted to tell you. But I don’t know how to approach the topic without looking too gossipy. If you see me looking a bit nauseous, attribute it to the subject I have yet to broach. It’s serious enough on its own that I don’t feel comfortable just blurting it out.

You know … damnit, I don’t feel good doing this but… I saw Manager Jun's girlfriend in the club the other day. Making out with some man. Yes, it was her. I am sure. And no, I didn’t hit the man and pull the girl out. Bummie dragged me away before I could. What do we do?  

Yours, with lotsa love and gummiebears,

The (only) Love of Your Life,

Lee Min Ho

p.s.: I refuse to use emoticons. I'm cheesy enough as it is.  

p.ps.: I love you. So much.