"It's on every website" my aunt came home still panting. She probably ran all the way from work. "This is what I've been telling you about, Krystal. My caution didn't last a week and it happened." The scolding went on for the next 10 minutes and I can't even get myself to focus on it. She used a lot of words that made me feel even nervous about the current situation that I am in. "I'm not trying to scare you, i'm just stating facts" she said going back and fort and also shaking and she keeps playing with thumbs, a mannerism that my mother told me she has everytime she is worried about something or someone. "This is a reality check, Krystal. When I left SME today, everyone was panicking. This is how serious you got yourself into. Everyone staff right now are calling in favors from every media news outlet and website they know. They're doing some serious damage control. Buying off every journalist that has you and his picture right now." then she flopped on the couch and started massaging her temples.

"You have the right to be upset with me" were the first words I said after she tried to calm herself down. I know it wasn't fair and especially for her. She's working there and her neck is on the line as well because of me. "I'm sorry..." my eyes got a bit teary. I couldn't handle this kind of pressure. She just stated every bit of fact that I never had the time to stop and think about. I sat right next to her and she saw my hands were still shivering. She got closer and hugged me.

"I told you when something goes wrong, tell me right away. You promised!" she comforted me. When my aunt hugged me, i suddenly just let it all flow. I cried so hard. The last time i cried this much when I finally realized that i never really had much of a father growing up. I hugged her tight and didn't move an inch. I just kept crying... and crying... and crying. I was speechless the whole time. Nothing right now could make me laugh. Not even a smile on my face.

When I finally started to calm down, my aunt stood up to get me water.

"The publicist, the lawyer, the manager of SHINee wants to see you first thing in the morning. The CEO will then talk to you afterwards for some clarifications." she said crossing her arms across her chest. "I'm not allowed in that forum, so to avoid more damages think clearly and deeply about this." she continued "they just want you to agree on some terms and clarifications that they will say to the public later on." because SME still han't given their official statement about the issue. 

"Will Taemin be there?" I asked. My aunt shook her head. "It'll be just you." 

I nodded. 

The following morning, my aunt and I went to SME's building as early as 6am just so the fans can't see me. She told me to where a hat, which I did and pretend like I was a staff inside. Luckily when we came, there weren't many people outside the building. We had to pass through their car park so that we couldn't attract the small crowd of fans. The place was a little bit empty for the moment but the staff started to eye me already. I kept my head down and followed my aunt.

"They will be arriving at around 8am. Be prepared." my aunt told me as she hugged me tightly this time. She then led me to a room which the door was made of glass. Inside was a simple interior design but at the same time it was really classy. There's a huge flat screen tv on the wall and an long glass table in the center of the room. I sat on one of the revovling chairs. There are around 3 couches on the sides too. And so I waited.

The first person to arrive was SHINee's manager. I knew his face from Taemin's birthday party. He sat in front of me on the opposite side of the table. "Today we'll be discussing about 3 things only. One" he raised his index finger "the issue and how bad it is now that the netizens are investigating the scandal. Two, the solution that you and this company will agree on and three, our public announcement for this so that when reporters will ask you, you have the same story as ours." He then gave me a hopeful smile. 

"Is he okay?" I asked him.

"He's....... managing" he said "i took away his phone, orders from the boss so you can't really call him or text him right now." he looked away. "Taemin talked a lot about you before. At first I got really worried that he's starting to like you. It's unusual for our idols to get involve in this kind of issue. But then nothing really happened so I thought that the two of you were good at this secret dating thing. I never told the company about it. I knew but I didn't. I don't have the heart to see these kids practice so hard and then not give them the tiniest bit of freedom. So I sometimes pretend not to know." he smirked "I'm their manager not their CEO nor their publicist. I'm more attached to SHINee than most people don't know." 

Then there was a pause in the middle. The aura became a little bit awkward so I glanced towards the ceiling and then looked at the clock. Any time now.

"I hope you make the correct decision, Miss Jung." those were his last words before the publicist came in with the lawyer. 

On the table, the lawyer laid a hard bound folder with the contract inside. After which they sat down and discussed the terms and conditions for the current situation that Taemin and I are in.

"The media won't be public with this news so that it will only look like the netizens are the ones responsible for this rumor. From now on Miss Jung, everything about this issue and scandal will be a rumor. Tell the media that you were a long time friend that just wanted to see Taemin during the summer and that you had no intentions of making this a big issue. Say that you were surprised that people misunderstood the relationship that the two of you had and that Taemin and you are nothing but the best of friends. Here is your cue cards. Learn them, read them, memorize them. You can just do adlibs when talking to them." the publicist handed me 2 small sized papers. It had the statement that I will be forever answering everytime journalists and fans will ask me about it. "Make it convincing because if the fans are not convinced it's not only your reputation will be destroyed here but also Taemin's" not even a smile was marked on this person's face.

"Now that that is clear to you, all you have to do is sign this contract. Inside states that you will be following to our terms accordingly and that you won't talk nor see Taemin for the next 1 year just so to keep everyone calm. It also states that not only do you obey to everything that we have told you, you must also not talk about it publicly once this is over. Everything that you will say afterwards against this company will be held liable against you. As for the matter of giving you benefit, tell us, how much do you want us to give you?"

So this is how cruel the world is?

I didn't even had the chance to say anything from the moment they came and they just decided on every single detail that Taemin and I will both do. I couldn't even respond to everything they just had said. I looked at them and looked at the contract that they are forcing me to sign right now. What kind of people are they? My throat sore when I tried to keep myself from calm, refrain myself from crying. The pain in my heart is heavy that even if someone stabbed me, I wouldn't even feel the pain. 

"Take your time" the lawyer said. "the pen is right there, we will leave you to sign. We'll be right back" the three of them stood up and left the room. I faced the contract and tears just fell down. I wanted to see Taemin right now. He's the only person that could help me decide on this. I want his warm smile, I want him to hug me so tight that i'll forget to breathe. I want him to show up and then swoop me away like a knight. 

But he didn't.

I stared at the door waiting for his footsteps.

But it wasn't there.

Just when I took the pen and read the contract, someone went inside the room. An old man that smiled at me with warmth. "No need to stand up and greet." I obeyed. He sat down and looked at the contract and then looked at me. I'm pretty sure he's the CEO. I did recall my aunt telling me that he'll be talking to me too.

"Tell me something honestly, do you miss home?" he looked at me as I nodded back at his question. "Who doesn't, right? Taemin hasn't had the time to visit his home and his parents ever since he became an idol in this company." he started. "You see, SHINee is one of the most successful and currently the most popular idol band this country has enjoyed. They have a full packed schedule that I sometimes forget they need some time to rest." he added while looking at the flat screen tv "I spoke with his manager in the past month and Taemin does have some wishes that he wants before debuting in Japan. The list was a bit silly but then again, he's just a kid. One was that he misses his home and wants to visit his parents for at least a week. Two was that he wants more solos in their songs. Three was that he wants to be in a variety show to show off his skills. Fourth was that he also wants some cameo appearance so he would know how it feels like to act in a set. And lastly, before he leaves for Japan, he wants to spend the day with you." he then looked at me straight to my eyes.

I gasped and the pain in my heart grew bigger. It feels like someone punctured it and I could no longer breathe.

"The contract says that after you sign it, you must at least not see him for a year which I think is really unfair, don't you think?" I looked at the CEO and I knew where this is going. I know he's going to bargain with me and I know he's going to use Taemin as a reason for me to agree on this. 

"This" he took out another piece of paper, is the new contract that i told them to redo. Since this page is unfair, I told them to make a new one. Now, this page of the contract that has been change states that if you sign this, I, the CEO will be giving Taemin his 5 most important wishes before he debuts in Japan. That includes a day of seeing you before he leaves" he then pushed the paper forward where I can read the exact words that he just told me right now. 

"I know that we both want Taemin happy and now, you can finally give that to him. As for the question of your money benefit into this contract, it is still there. You can use it in anything you want." 

"The decision is up to you. You're a smart girl, if you love Taemin like you said you do then you will have the heart to give him these 5 wishes that I could never give to my other idols."

And then that was it. 

Everything he said made sense. He's right. Taemin had always talked about wanting to see his mom but he's not allowed too. He had always told me that there are so many things that he could do but his company could never let him and with this, I can give him all of those things that he has wanted. Ever. I would be the most selfish girlfriend if I'd keep him for myself. He's an idol, it's his job and this was all my fault. So i had to be responsible. I am making this decision.

And my decision is final.

[UPDATE: WHO WANTS A TAEMIN POV? WHO WANTS A CHAPTER WITH JUST TAEMIN'S POV???? I'm currently caught in between making a POV for Taemin (the whole chapter) or not. Comment if you want! - crazyHJ]