It’s been a busy day in Japan because the company their wanted to see us before we finally debut in the second half of the year. It was different there. We had our reliable translator but Japan is very much new to me. The weird and at the same time edgy fashion. The eccentric hairstyles that not only women have but also men. The adorable little robot pets they have. It was all so different for me. Seoul was high tech too but their high tech in Japan had a little weirdness in it. Not that it’s a bad thing but I don’t know, I haven’t given it much chance yet. After all, I have never been there before. I’m sure I’ll get used to it.

So today was the day where we go back to Seoul. Our flight to Incheon was pushed earlier than expected and I could no longer wait for it. One, I miss Korean food already and two we have to practice for next week events. The moment we stepped out of the plane I went to the bathroom to pee. Of course my other members and my manager went straight to the vehicle. It’s not that I’m not good with directions it’s just that at that day my head was just blank. I randomly walked through different parts of the airport; literally went back and forth to different areas until I managed to accept that I am lost. Walking towards the information area I asked the lovely woman in uniform to where the exit was. Sure enough she led me to a place where I can’t be ambush by my own fans. I followed accordingly and slipped in my glasses. Young girls kept staring and giggling, which is my cue for ‘walk faster’. I know my pace was fast but I can practically smell their fangirl auras behind me. Without looking at where I was going I bumped into someone and dropped my phone and headphones on the ground. . I kept looking if someone else was still on my tail but thankfully, no one was there……. YET.

I stared at the person who I bumped into and she looked really annoyed. “sorry” I apologized. Whatever, all it takes just to get out of here or else.  So I immediately took my stuff and so did she. I placed my phone inside my pocket and gave her an apologetic bow and walked away as fast as I could. While I was walking towards my near exit, my feet stopped. I have no idea why but there was something about that girl that makes my heart suddenly flutter. I know it’s pure bull if you think about it, how can I all of a sudden just have had that amount of feeling of intensity with someone I barely knew. I looked at fingers as I raised them on my face, we both touched even for like 0.5 seconds.

I shook my head and turned to face her. She was still walking. She looked pretty even with her back profile. She had this long black hair that I like. Her eyes were pretty as the sun and even though she gave me a deadly look, I couldn’t help but like it as well. She’s definitely my style but the thing is, I don’t I may even see her again. It’s not like we’ll pass this corridor every day, unless if she works here. She’s a mystery and maybe she’ll remain that way forever.

I ran away at the sight of fangirls screaming my name. Luckily, I managed to jump into the van before they could catch me. My members were staring at me and asked me where I had been so I told them the whole thing that happened to me. However, I cut the part where I met this girl whom at first sight made me want to chase her. I haven’t felt like this for someone, not ever since I became an idol at least. Everyone in this business is pure fake. All the girls are pretentious people that just wants a thing or two and then leaves you behind—I don’t want that. I never seemed to like that system. If I want to fall inlove with someone, I want her to be someone that doesn’t take me for granted and doesn’t take me as a joke. I slept from Incheon to Seoul and then slept again when we came back to our dorm. The only time I woke up was when Minho told me to get ready to go to the practice studio.

Of course I was the last one to go to the dance practice studio, I was too lazy to even begin the practice today. Besides, the choreographer comes in an hour later before we all start practicing. We have that much time for warm ups.  When I took out my phone to call Kibum-hyung, I was shocked to look at the wallpaper. Wasn’t she the girl from earlier??? Did I take a picture of her while I was running away from fans? I scrolled towards her Gallery section and looked at her pictures. She’s a traveler… She’s been to LA, New York, Michigan, Kansas—wait are they all in the US? I have absolutely no idea but she’s definitely been in the States.

She’s really pretty.

It took me awhile to realize that we both exchanged phones. I remembered that I dropped my phone on the ground when I bumped into her, which made the blood in my veins circulate faster. OH NO! I immediately pushed the number buttons and called my phone number. This is bad.

It’s really bad. What if she’s a fan and was just distracting me so that she could get hold of my phone. My pictures will all be gone and will be published into the worldwide web. Taemin, calm down. You can fix this. You have been through this torture before, handling a fan will be easy now. You can just charm your way through.  When a heard an annoyed ‘hello’ on the phone, I immediately threatened her. This way it’ll make her realize that I need my phone back and as soon as possible too.

To my surprise and to my absolute surprise she doesn’t even know me? Of course my egoistic self would feel hurt. The SHINee pride is within my blood. How come this girl has no idea of who I was? I’m the nation’s little brother. I dance to Noona, You’re so Pretty. I’m the loveable Taemin.

We both decided to meet and exchange phone the next day. I didn’t tell my manager about it, he’ll just go bananas and make unnecessary notions about it. He might even tell the company and the company will just do some serious damage control and will have to force that girl to sign a contract not to get near me for more than 5 meters away. It’s absurd.

The day we met to exchange phones was the day that I could no longer get her image off of my head. There was really something about her that made me like her even if we just met. Was it because she showed me how normal she was? Was it because she showed me that despite I was an idol, she never really cared? Was it her beautiful brown eyes or was it her long loveable hair? What was it about her that had me gone nuts.

I had no idea how it exactly really started but after that we suddenly became friends and luckily for me, became closer than I would have expected. Krystal is this charming young girl that takes any guy’s breath away. She’s funky, funny, adorable, sweet, kind, forgiving, she’s everything. She’s too perfect for me. I know I could see her flaws but I pretend not to. And she motivates me from time to time which just made me fall in love with her even more.  However, I’m too scared to tell her. It’s in her actions that  I am scared of. I’m terrified that if I confess to her my true feelings that she would reject me.

Eventually, I told her about my feelings and she told me mine. I guess we both felt the same way as we shared one incredible kiss under that old oak tree. She was everything that mattered to me and I no longer cared if the manager knew and scolded me from time to time. I haven’t done this relationship thing ever. Krystal was the first girlfriend I ever had and I will treat her so well and protect her from everything.

Tragedy started after we bought my butterfly bracelet. It became chaotic that I thought I may have just hanged myself and let everyone just deal with it. That night was the night my manager took away my phone and the pain of seeing it taken away from me is even worse. I have always told Krystal I would protect her no matter what but I can’t even call her, I can’t even see her. The pain stung me so badly I couldn’t take a look at myself in the mirror. I was pathetic. I don’t have the guts like she does. She showed me kindness and love and this was the only thing I could her—sadness and issues. I can’t handle seeing her name on the webpages and netizens calling her ‘’ or ‘’. I was not only mad at them but I was also mad at myself. She didn’t deserve this right now. She never did.

The following day she went to see me. I’m actually surprised to see that she’s allowed inside this building. I’m pretty sure she will get beaten up by my fans if they saw her come in and out. She held my hand and it was as if everything was okay. I ran away with her. The members didn’t even know, the manager didn’t know, the people and staff on SME didn’t even know. We spent the day together, fulfilling everything that a normal couple would do. For the first time ever, in a long time, I have felt comfortable and contented with where I was. I wanted her right by my side and I was ready to pull everything away even my career just for her.

I love Krystal Jung. I love her so much.

The date ended with her deciding to break-up. Of course I was starting to lose my mind.  What was she thinking?!?! Is she even thinking straight? Why would she just leave all of a sudden? No I couldn’t even succumb to her wishes.

“You promised!” I told her as I clenched my fist tighter. “You always promised me that you’ll be here when I needed you.” I looked her straight into her eyes. I wanted to beat someone up, I am so mad right now and frustrated at everything. “How can you leave me like this?!” but she gave no reply. She walked away but my feet dragged me and caught up with her. I hugged her so tightly; I didn’t want to lose her. Not ever. I won’t let her do this. “Krystal stop! Don’t! I ask you to just stay” the pain in my heart was slowly opening more wounds and I fear that no one could ever patch them back together.

But she didn’t. She left on a taxi as I stood there with tears running down on my cheeks. My body slowly started to shake until I could no longer handle it. My knees touched the ground as I cried into the silence. She was the first person that was never fake to me; she loved me not because I was an idol but because I was the one person who she can be herself around. I sat on the grass and had no intentions of going back. There were so many thoughts in my mind, even leaving as an idol for good became an option. However, her words repeated through my head. She understood where I stand as an idol but she was never a distraction to me. She was the reason I was suddenly happy with who I am. She gave me strength even though she was just on the sidelines and making small waves at me during music shows.

“Taemin…” my manager approached me and I just stared at him. He didn’t know what to say and I had nothing else to say. I can’t beat him up for the things that he had covered for me. He knew that I liked Krystal, he knew very well how much I have changed in these past few months and he managed never to tell the company about her. In fact, I should be thankful to him.

“Hyung…” I said putting up all of my strength. “Can we go to the airport?” I continued while wiping my tears. “Can I just see her leave?” She decided that we both break-up, that we both needed closure so we can move on and letting her on that plane was my decision to let her go even if my heart says NO. I hope she doesn’t regret this decision, but even if she did, and one day she’ll come back to me I will accept her with open arms no questions asked. That’s how much I love her.

“And I promise, I will do anything the company wants me to do. I won’t go after her, I just want to see her leave” leave me forever.

We went to the airport and I watched her airplane leave. I cried seeing that plane soar into the night. I ran after it. I know I can’t catch up to it and I very well know that I can’t fly. My eyes followed the plane towards the sky, I can’t process well without Krystal. I need her back! Come back, Krystal! Come back!  The plane kept going through the clouds until I could no longer see them with my two eyes. So that was it, she’s finally left for good.

I returned to my manager and I watched him with gloom. He knew how I felt right now. I felt dead, numb – no matter how much beating I get right now I don’t think I’ll be able to feel it. I didn’t care if I’d walk and a car would just pass by to kill me. That would better right? The pain would then be gone afterwards. My manger didn’t say anything but opened the door for me.

I followed obediently, just like I always am.

[A/N: story's not over yet guys but since you people voted for a Taemin POV, this is what I came up with. Did you like it perhaps? I think I have 1 more chapter left? LOL No idea. I'm still drafting my works right now. It'll be depending on how long one chapter would be ^^, -crazyHJ]