Crush : an informal term for feelings of love, romance, or infatuation felt by young people during their childhood and even adolescence, so-called for its resemblance to the adoring, worshipful affection that may be felt by a puppy. "Simple infatuation is often called a 'crush' -  Wikipedia

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Chapter 1: First Crush

Junior High. Everyone says this is the year where every teenage girl experience almost everything they should before they become a fully grown woman.

In my case, I did. Well, almost.

I’m not your typical nerd, shy or quiet girl. But I’m also not your typical popular girl either. I’m somewhere in between. I could get loud, annoying even. But just between me and my close friends. I’m popular too, but ofcourse only in my neighbourhood and classroom. Tsk. They say I’m a bit boyish, well… I think I was a boy at some point in between choosing a basketball over a Barbie doll. However, I was disappointed when I had my first period during middle school. I really did wished I was boy.

“Dara-ah!” Bom squealed while running toward me.

I waved back, excited to see my best friend again after 2 boring months of summer vacation. Today’s our first day of our Junior High! Kyaaaah!

“Guess what??!” Bom excitedly grab both my shoulders.

“What?” I asked dumbfounded.

“We’re on the same class this year!!! Isn’t that great?! And the best part is, CL and Minzy too!!!” Bom jumped in place before giving me her infamous hug.

“Sincha?? That’s great!!” I said after Bom let go.

Bom and I had been friend since middle school. I guess since  we have the same surname, we always end up sitting beside each other and not long after, we became close friends then best friends over time. CL and Minzy joined us during our first year in highschool. And the four of us became un-separable. We even named our self 2ne1. I don’t even remember why.

“C’mon! Let’s go!!.. This year’s gonna be awesome I can feel it!” Bom giggled as we ran across the hall towards our classroom.

We squeezed in between a massive sea of girls giggling and excited, like ourselves during our first day. Yes, we study at an all-girl school. Cool right? We don’t have to suffer boy’s childish gags, we don’t have to endure their awful smell after playing ball under the sun, and most of all we are not required to be conscious of how we look. But in my case, its not. Believe me!

I don’t have anything against my fellow female population. But I just hate how girls in my school behave in and outside our school. Alright, first case: Their smell is much worse than sweaty boys. How? Some girls like to pour their perfume all over their uniform or even on their hair. And the worst part is, their friends would do the same. So imagine, 5 or 6 girls in a group, all smelling different kind of perfume, walk pass through you? I almost vomit the first time I experienced it. Second case: Their gag’s are much much stupid and childish than boys. How? Who would be in their right mind to pull someone else’s bra during class? And some mean girls would pick on some innocent, shy girl by putting bubble gum on their hair. What are we 6? We’re in highschool people!! We should act like one. On the other hand, I don’t have a clue how should a high schooler should act. Well, no one even knows. Why would I?

I’m thankful, me and my friends are one of the few normal girls in school. And we are running extinct. Seriously.

“Unnie!!” Minzy squealed upon seeing us enter the room. “I save you a seat!!”

We all sat at the back. CL and Minzy sat infront of us, while Bom and I sat at the last row, just behind them. I scan my eyes around the room. I can see some familiar faces and some who were my previous classmates last year. Indeed, I also got a feeling this is going to be one hell of a year. I smiled and listened to my friend’s talk about their summer vacation while we wait for our teacher.

Last class of the day. Bom and I are already exhausted in contrast with the two infront of us.

“Unnie! Guess what! I’ve got a date later.” CL excitedly whispered.

“Whoa? Really? Who?” Bom excitedly asked.

“It's a secret. Hahahaha!” CL grinned, blushing at the same time. “I’ll tell you guys all about him sometime. Promise!”

Ok.So, I told you I wished I was a boy awhile ago right? Well, when I unfortunately found out I was indeed a girl. I became conscious with the opposite . I do have several guy friends in my neighbourhood. I practically grew up with them. So instead of playing dolls I was always out of the house playing with boy’s toys from earthworms, marbles, cards and balls and even toy guns. So, imagine my mom’s relief when I finally made friends with an actual girl. Bom.

Among my guy friends, I grew an unusual attraction to one of them. His name was Donghae. He lives not far from our house. He was always kind to all of us, and being the only girl among our friends, he was more caring towards me. And not long after, I became conscious of his presence. Bom called it ‘crush’. Yep, I now have my first official ‘crush’. Yey! Should I be happy? Nope! It’s irritating!! Not to mention annoying! WHY? I could no longer play comfortably whenever his around. My other guy friends, Eunhyuk and Siwon would now tease us. So, I end up avoiding him. Now, after 3 years, we’re now more like acquaintances. We barely hang out anymore, maybe because we now have different interest. We no longer play with toys or cards. You can say that we’ve now grown.

And with Bom entering my life, I was now aware of my difference against boys. I grew conscious of how I look. I may not be the prettiest girl, but I think I’m not the ugliest either. Bom, being the first girl friend I ever had, teach me how t