168 hours

The stars are twinkling brightly upon the darkness of the sky. Bright glow scattered through the silent ambience.

Leaning on my shoulders, Jinri sleeps with peace. Resting her tired and weak body.

Tracking back the past, Jinri was cheerful and energetic. She always made me laugh. But eventually, that cheerfulness faded away together with her strength. She is a novel writer so she lacked sleep. Her red blood cells were depleted and leukemia attacked her.

Now, it's already on the most deadly level.

And doctor said that she only had a week.

Due to this, I asked her to request something from me and I will fulfill those in 7 days.

Not that I already lose hope that she'll be fine. But because I want to make all those 7 days that she thinks an end for her to be worthy and lift up her saddened heart....We've been together for 4 years, turning 5. And I have always loved her. Not just as a best friend. But more than that. The problem is I could not tell her about my feelings.

My heart's too frightened for the changes.

"Oppa."

Still leaning on my shoulder, she looked at me with sleepy eyes and murmured.

Her first request is for me to spend the night with her. She wants to be away from the hospital. She wants to lean on my shoulder rest and talk until the end of the day. Just the two of us. Doing things we have always done together.

And it started tonight.

"Yes?"

"Please… dance… for me."

I smiled at her brightly ,patted her head. She lifted her head as I stand up slowly, brushing the dust off my clothes.

"What do you want me to dance? Something like RNB, Retro, Ballet or what?"

"Hmmm… My... favorite song… Baby don’t cry. I… will sing… and you'll… dance!"

I grinned and nodded of agreement. She started humming to the tune of the song. She had a hard time singing. And her pale face tells it all. I know she is just enduring everything. But I have to show her that I’m happy.

And I’m sure that’ll make her happy too.

She sang with her weak voice. Cracking and taking pause for every syllable. She could hardly breath. So I danced with all my might. 

"Baby don’t cry tonight after the darkness passes

Baby don’t cry tonight it’ll become as if it never happened

You’re not the one to disappear into foam, something you never should’ve known"

With every lyrics of the song, my movements drew neon colors and enlightened her mood. As I glanced at her, she smiled weakly, yet her eyes were shimmering. I smiled back and continued dancing from tips of my fingers.

"So Baby don’t cry...cry... my love will protect you"

At the last tune of the words, she smiled brightly. I can rarely see that smile and it made me overwhelmed to make a special girl regain her cheerfulness.

"Oppa, you're… so great…"

"Am I?"

Walking towards the stair she is sitting on, I chuckled and sat beside her.

"I'm glad you liked my dancing."

"Yeah."

She pouted of disappointment and heaved a sigh. Trying to fake a smile with her teary eyes.

"I…I feel… so bad… that… I won't be… a-able to watch you dance… again… after this… week. It's… It’s…so saddening."

Giggling sadly, she bowed her head a little, and tears fell down her eyes. She was smiling, but it was later replaced by sniffs. She leaned on my shoulder and cried harder.

"Don't cry."

I wiped her tears and patted her head.

"We're here to do lots of enjoyable things. Those things we often do. I'm not here to see you cry. I'm here to make and see you happy."

Smiling brightly, I patted her head again. She smiled, though tears were still flowing from her eyes.

167 hours

"Cappuccino tastes great right?"

I let out a smile and drank a bit.

"Yeah. I… mi-missed… this."

Timidly, Jinri smiled and drank slowly.

Before, drinking cappuccino was our favorite thing to do at night. Especially when we're talking with each other. For a year, we missed all things we did because Jinri have to stay in the hospital. And I could rarely visit since I was working as a dancer.

"Oppa. I'm... sleepy."

She placed her mug on the bedside table and rubbed her eyes. This girl is already 17 years old. But still act like a baby.

There are times she would be serious and act maturely. But that rarely happened.

Lying down on the bed, she closed her eyes and spoke with her soft voice.

“Oppa. If I...I… will remove this… wig, do you think… I’m… sti-still… beautiful?”

I smiled and heaved a sigh.

“Of course. You were always beautiful. No matter what, you’re the prettiest girl I know.”

“Really?”

She smiled sweetly and took a deep breath. And spoke again, with a weak and soft tune. Cracking every second and breaking the silence with her noisy breathing.

“I…I feel-feel so…dizzy…Will…will I…still live…long?”

The other words she said were unclear as murmurs. Since she got sick, she always felt sleepy. She would also request lots of water. And she can hardly eat. Now, she’s getting a little bit better. And I believe that she’ll completely recover.

“Oppa believes you’ll get better...”

Letting out a faint smile, I patted her forehead and kissed it like I'm her big brother. My heart beats fast. But I should keep my feelings to myself.

As I lay on the bed beside her, my heart beats faster. It remained until I closed my eyes.

That time, I can only hear the audible beats of my heart, telling me to express my love for my best friend.

I want to hug her…

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