You took in a deep shaky breath, remembering all the pain and hurt you have been going through since he walked out on you. "They say when a person is faced with a hard, life-altering event, you find out what kind of person they really are." You swallowed and forced yourself to look him in the eyes. "And I found out the kind of person you are."
Yongguk stared back at you for a moment and then nodded his head. "Fine. I can take a hint too." Then he walked to the front door but stopped and turned to face you. "If you ever want to talk about it, you can call me."
You shook your head. "You never answered the phone before. Sorry if I don't believe you will this time."
His jaw clenched slightly before looking away. "Yeah I know. I did something horrible and I regret it, I'm sorry. But how about a little regret from you?"
"From me?" you asked, confused.
"Yeah from you." he firmly said, meeting your gaze. "For murdering my child." Then he opened the front door and walked out, slamming the door behind him.
It felt like a knife pierced your chest as your mouth dropped open and you stared at the door in disbelief. Then you legs collapsed and you fell on to the couch. The tears came slowly at first but then came faster and faster as you started sobbing uncontrollably. You curled up on the couch and continued crying for what seemed like hours.
When it got dark, you numbly got off the couch and shuffled to the bedroom. You laid on the bed and stared at the empty spot that Yongguk filled when he spent the night.
"You ." you whispered. "You selfish, ."
Then you were crying yet again. Since that day you found out you were pregnant, you were sure you cried enough tears to fill the ocean. The pain you felt in your chest told you though that you wouldn't be done crying any time soon.
"I'm the same." you mumbled as you grabbed a pillow and hugged it to your chest. "I'm a piece of , poor excuse for a human being. I don't deserve to ever be happy again."
Just like all the other past nights, you cried yourself to sleep.


You stared off in to the distance until a hand waved in front of your face causing you to blink out of your stupor.
"You're really out of it today." your co-worker commented.
"Sorry." you told her while shaking your head.
She looked at you inquisitively. "Something about today important?"
"No. It's just another day." you replied. Then you stopped your hand from sub-consciously moving to your stomach and forced the fact that today would have been your due date out of your mind.
"Oh. I thought maybe it had to do with your ex. Why'd you two break up anyways?" she asked.
"It just didn't work out." you answered and silently prayed she'd change the subject.
"Shame." she pouted. "Why didn't you ever call the one customer back though? The cute guy that gave you his number?"
"I'm not ready for a relationship." you told her. 'He's better off with someone else besides a person like me.'
She rolled her eyes at you. "Just because one relationship ended, doesn't mean you can't try again. You deserve to be happy too."
'No I don't.' you thought to yourself. "I'll date when I'm ready."
She groaned but finally walked away. You let out a small, grateful sigh and tried to focus on your work. The last thing you wanted was to break down in front of everywhere at work. You'll do that at home like always. Where no one can see and judge you for a secret you'll carry to your grave because no one will believe you when you say it felt like two people died that day. They'll just call you a monster and a murderer. Just like the person you had onced loved.
Then a couple walked in carrying a baby.
"Welcome." you greeted with a forced smile on your face.