CHAPTER FORTY eight; it's okay

It felt unusual; I don’t know if it’s the fact that I checked myself out of the hospital or if it’s the atmosphere of returning to school. Yesterday, I went home by myself and saw Baekhyun outside the gate. Luckily, my mother was at her work and no one was home. It wouldn’t have been different if mother were home. I told Baekhyun that I was tired and didn’t even let him in the house. I just hope it didn’t break his heart to push him away like that like what it did to mine. I hated to say those words but I just had to.  And last night was worse,

I casually laid my bag on my table; everyone’s eyes were at me although they weren’t moving at all. No hugs or mouthful of I miss you-s were shot at me. It’s better that way but the silence was broken the moment I faced Dae-mi. “It IS you!” she said with an eyesmile to come with her grabby hands.

It’s not contagious; go ahead, hug her. I thought to myself and slowly went into her embrace. I missed her, my friends. Dae-mi’s hug was tight and she wasn’t letting go a bit when I was trying to pull away. “Where have you been? You didn’t even text me.” She said, laying her chin on my shoulder.

I tried to smile through her words, even though I tried my best, it was still weak. I was still weak. “Extended vacation because…. Why not?” I fake laughed in the middle of my words, convincingly, that is.

My eyes lift up from looking down the floor to the people around me. I scanned them one by one; they were my family in school. Jongin’s hair was dyed to blonde, Sehun’s had a brown shade and he became buffer, Soya still had that long straight hair; she didn’t change a bit, and In-na was there with her dyed brownish blonde hair in a pony tail; the baby hair on her sides made it look better for her, she was beautiful.

I smiled at the sudden close movements of my friends; they all surrounded me in one circle and hugged me tight as the