our beginning
Love me againHow can I make my love become misery ?? I want to live with you till the last day of my life. I want to live with you and grow old with you… I want to do anything for you…just to make you happy. It’s my happiness….
I rememeber, in the previous lifetime, a girl asked me : Do you feel happy, Ji Yong ? The girl asked me when we stood on the beach, with all the star was shining on us… I lift my head and looked at beautiful stars, I didn’t answer her…Not because I didn’t want to but because till that day, I didn’t know what my happiness was…
I tried hard to achieve my dream, I could be the one that I wanted me to be, I received love from all the people who asked to be in love with me. I lived, I existed, I did anything that a person did… Like that, life just passed by. I felt like that was enough for a life… I didn’t have anything that I was greedy for it and I didn’t have anyone make me feel that I need them. People came and went, it was not a serious issue to me at all. In the end, I thought, that time, I only need me in that life… Till today, if I don’t love my baby Panda, maybe I will be always like that…
I and Seungri decided to take a rest, and we went to a beautiful and peace beach. After all the problem we had to go through, we need time to recover. Seungri still wants to keep a space with me. I can’t blame him about that, after all, the pain can’t go easily, the more you love one person, the more pain you receive when thay hurt you. Even if that not my fault , it’s because Seungri loves me, so his heart just has so many wounds. I can’t ask him to be more open to me fastly, I won’t use words, it’s useless. I will only use action to tell my baby that I love him and only him in this life. To let him accept this vacation with me, whiny, cry, threw tantrums, hugged him like a koala, I used all the tricks. Haizzz, I know that I lost all my face, my man pride when I used that, but… Never mind, my face’s skin is thick enough to act like that !! Just because of my soul mate’s smile, I can do anything that more ashamed than that anyway !!!
Tonight, when the moon is full and smiles gentle in the sky, with all the beautiful stars are shining the magic light of them, I pull Seungri with me to take a walk on the beach. Seungri silently walks beside me, he doesn’t talk anything, I know that he still doesn’t believe in me. When we walk to a empty place, when we can see the sky most clearly, I ask him.
“ Seungri, Do you believe that it has “ the star of happiness” ?
Seungri is looking at the sky, when he heard my question, he turns to look at me with the look “ I don’t know what you talked about” on his face. He looks so cute like this. So I pat his head and laugh a little. Seungri is always curious about all the things that he can’t understand, even if he still doesn’t want to ask or talk, it’s all written on his face like : “ I want to know, tell me, you have to tell me !!”. My lover is always this childish side, and it makes me love him more and more. I think just only look at him also make me love him more, too !! Oh my, I’m just a a crazy guy who fall in love so hard !!
“ Happiness star is the most beautiful star in the sky, when you can see that, you will forever be happy in life. It’s only a fairy story any way…”
Seungri looks at me in a few minutes and turns to look at the sky again. I know that he will try to find it !! My baby is just too cute !! I gently hug him from behind, let him lean his back on me and I put my head on his shoulder. When I embrace him like t
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