I decided to put my feelings into this whole year.  Whether God wants it or not, I will definitely make sure to confess to him.  My only love in the whole universe.  

My name is Hannah Kyung Hwa and I am sixteen years old, currently attending Seoul High School.  Not much of a big deal.  Just an ordinary girl.  But with a secret.  That secret is that I have an incurable disease hidden within my body.  Of course no one has known about it and I'm not planning to tell anyone.  Secrets are secrets.  I don't tell anyone, not even my closest friends.

I smiled.  Am I sad? That I'm not going to be able to live that long? In truth, no.  It is my fate and I cannot avoid it.  Yes.  My other secret is this:  I only have until June 12.2013 to live; the end of my second year as a high schooler.

This is my journal entry.  My doctor told me to keep entries as I go on along in case I forget some memories of mine along the way.  Right now, I am in a hospital.  Date- December 24,2012. Christmas Day for everyone to celebrate.  It has been a long time since I have seen snow.  Snow reminds me of frosted tear drops falling down the heavens.

Is it crying for me? That's what I always ask God, night by night.  

Is it sad? 

Besides love, I have no other emotions.  Weird you may call it but that is the truth.  For I have long forgotten such feelings in the past.

Having to suffer in this kind of situation is something I'm not surprised.  You see, when I was ten years old, I considered the hospital as my new home, for my parents had died on that time.  Loneliness soon covered me and along with it are the painful, sadness, anger, emotions mixed together.  But they were all gone because of this new feeling called love.

Believe it or not, love has always been there for me.  It never left my side.  Even though I will have some more difficult tasks ahead of me, somehow love is always there beside me.  Hope... Hope is considered as love.  Therefore love is alive, beating thump thump thump inside of my chest, my body, and my soul.

The sky seemed nice.  Tomorrow will be another day where time goes by fast.  Look forward for two seconds and then look back, well what do you know? It's already January.  My time is running out.  I am not afraid.  No.  I still have things that needed to be accomplished.  I will not leave until they are done.

So dear diary, please guide me throughout my entire life.  The snow is pretty tonight. 

It's so...  Beautiful.

___________________ Hannah, December 24,2012