Revealing
I hate you:Don't play with someone's feelings just because you're unsure of your own:
Didi massaged her temple in exasperation. She did not like this situation. Situation that forced her to take a stand that might hurt somebody's feeling, and there is a possibility it was her own. Well, although the decision should not be too difficult thou, related to what have happened in a couple days back then.
Didi mentally draw a few illustrations in her mind.
Look. This is guy (A). Arrow to the sleeping human being snoring in her lap. Him -circle his face with red marker- was someone who she likes secretly, that she just realized about months ago. Said that she was really in love head over heels on him, before she knew how he felt about her.
"A little brother? Are you kidding me? I'm a few months older than you". Didi whispered.
She pouted, then looked down at the cute sleeping face with the eyes closed, then started babbling alone in a voice that was barely audible.
"I must be very crazy and mentally unhealthy because i spent so many hours and energy to think about you, and your sparkling cuteness, and wish that you might have a mutual feeling for me. It's your fault, you know, provide me with endless sweet attentions. I know maybe you didn't have any intention to do that. But, i mean, who's not gonna fall for that? Anybody? No one? Come on, you could make the fangirls scream out loud, fainted, just by giving them an eye contact even just in photos! I bet if the lens of the photographers camera in the last awards event you attended for were a living being, they would have been melted everytime you made eye contact to the camera"
Didi took a glance downward.
Hey! did he just smile?
"Eiii .. dreaming something sweet, Mr.Park? You know, i'm a huge fan of your smile"
Her finger floated in the air a few inches from his nose. A heavy sigh let out from her. She fight the urge to run her finger tip over his perfect face.
A high impressive wide forehead, endless lashes, sculpted delicate nose, high cheekbones, pouty rosy lips, teardrop-shaped dimples, well angled chin, heart-shaped Adam's apple, and ast but not least... his y puckered scar. I must be getting A++ at Yoochunotomy, Didi thought.
"I must be overdosed of you, Chunnie~ah. And it hurts. You know, getting too much at one time and lost it for long, i thought i could die because of it. I wanted you more and more everyday, and i dropped hard when i knew that you have nothing for me. Maybe i should just stop. I should have abbandoned this feeling for a long time ago and kept everything to myself, like you have said a couple days ago in my room. You're just too good to be true. Unreacable. Furthermore, why do I have to maintain the feeling that I already known there is no hope for it".
Didi took a glance down once again, checking. She could barely hear his constant breathing, indicated that he should been deeply fallen asleep. She recalled how the guy just came home from Shanghai an hour ago when she walked upstair, to wait Jaejoong pick her up. Then there was Yoochun, gave her a hug and said that he was very tired and need some nap. He pushed her to sit on the couch, made her tighs to be his pillow and she couldnt do or said anything to it.
Didi let out another sigh.
Why do i have to be so weak toward you?
Continue with her mental illustration. And now, there is guy (B). Arrow to the door that seperated this room and the balcony. He was a very good guy. A very brotherly (or sisterly?) caring person that she would have been gone to when she was getting hard on something, or someone you-know-who.
"Jaejoong have confessed his feeling last night. I was shocked to the max at that time, couldn't said anything. You know, it was not only because the confession itself but also because his intense gaze, like he could make my eyes blind by it. What should i do? Well, it's kind of late to question about it now, just to be reminded, the guy is outside this room waiting for me. I've been agreed to have a date with him. Well, i'm trying, you know. Try to give him a chance, and to me to open my heart for someone else out there who said that he loved me, instead of waiting another one who dont have any special feeling for me. It's better to be loved than to love, right? Moreover, who doesnt want to date the Kim Jaejoong? Not that i was agreed to date him because he is a superidol just like you and i could win him over other girls all over the world. He is really a very good guy. And i think i dont want to missed a guy like him. i'm taking the chance. Chance to be happy"
Didi paused, and suddenly awakened from her unconscious mumbling and fully aware about time. She glanced toward the black watch in her right wrist.
"Oh my God! Jeje should have been waiting too long", she said
She then proceed to put her belonging into a denim sling bag beside her carefully, trying not to make a loud noise. After a few second staring, she lifted Yoochun's head from her lap then softly placed it on a blue cussion to replace her tighs. She smiled and patted his head gently.
"Gotta go.. Nice sleep, chunnie~ah", she whispered before took off.
But only a few steps then she unmanaged to get out off the room. She pulled by her wrist, by the sleeping boy, who didn't bother to open his eyes but hold her wrist tightly.
"Don't go"
She widened her eyes and turned back toward him.
"Bwo?? Why? You were not sleeping?"
"Please.. stay", he said with his trademark deep husky voice, finally opened his eyes and looked into her eyes straightly.
She frowned.
"Yoochun, what do you think you're doing?"
She was waiting for an answer in a few second of silent.
"I dont want to lose you"
******
Hey hey! hello again ^^
Updating again
It's been a week? or more :p
I have a packed schedule for my cake+cupcake orders back then
But i'm having a few days off.. yeayy \(^.^)/
So, i hope i can update again tomorrow
Thank you for your comments when i was 'missing' hehehe..
Really appreciate that, guys *bear hug*
Leave more comments in this chapter, would you? ;)
See ya again soon
*smooch*
~D~
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