I only know one love, I don't know how to love someone else

I'm a fool that only wants you

Even if people talks to me, I only hears and sees you

What I should do?

 

Operation ended with huge success, all doctor and nurse rejoice because this huge success operation. Jessica just like their family that they adore so much, Alex and Shinae even prepare party for Jessica. Boa just smile when she see Jessica with bandage around her eye, she still sleeping peacefully after operation.

“I guess you can’t wait to see your seobang when you open your eye…I pray for your future, Jessica. I hope you will meet your seobang soon and I wish you might be able to teach my stubborn dongsaeng some sense into her head! I leave our Yuri in your care, so please don’t give up on her!” Boa bowing at Jessica.

The day Jessica will open her bandage come, everyone like TaeNy, SooSun, YoonHyun, HyoNic, and Kwon family except Yuri and her brother’s come to Jessica room. Jessica bit disappoint because her seobang never come to her after operation but she know her seobang must be busy, very much busy and she worry about her health.

Slowly Jessica open her eye, blink it once or two times because of sudden light. It’s been a long time since she seen the sunlight. When she adapted with this sudden brightness, she look around her room and smile to her friends.

Tiffany, she notices her from her usual strawberry perfume and pink addict lke right now her bright pink shirt. She really beautiful girl with dazzling eye-smile. Taeyeon, short girl who hugging Tiffany waist. Like what her seobang said, she looks so innocent but so byun.

Yoona indeed pretty girl and have beautiful eye like doe, but when she laugh…flounder has come. Seohyun the proper girl standing beside Yoona, she look so innocent and angel like but Jessica notice they way she scolding Yoona really stern one.

Sunny the girl who showing her the aegyo smile, cute like little rabbits and short girl too…even shorter than Taeyeon. Sooyoung, the tall skinny girl bit tanned too. She really shikshin she even eat triple bypass burger.

Nicole, she recognize Nicole from Nicole perfume too, sweet vanilla like in bakery shop. Hyoyeon, the chooding…the short girl beside Nicole is the clue, she even dance her vogue style right now as celebration for Jessica. She recognize Boa and the other. She looking around to find her seobang but found nothing.

Boa smiles at Jessica, because she knows that Jessica searching for Yuri but she only smile because she vow to keep a secret for Yuri. “Jessica, here…present for you” when Jessica open the case, white violin. White violin that has gold initial of K.Y engrave on it. When the violin being moved or played, the movement make glistering on violin like fallen snow.

“K.Y” Jessica tracing the outline of engrave and smile, “Is this given from my seobang?”

 

Jessica enrolled to Tiffany school and magically ends up on the same class room. She know her seobang in the same class with Tiffany. She looking around to see her seobang but none of student make her heart flustering or feel anything. “For your seat…whose seat in the back?” Shinyoung said while looking at sit near back door.

“Kwon Yuri, but she has another meeting again with her club”

“Okay, you can sit there and Kim Taeyeon don’t reply me with your eye glue on Tiffany …yes, Kim Yoobin? Shinyoung ask because Yoobin raised her hands, while Jessica stared at Yoobin.

Kim Yoobin…K.Y but Kwon Yuri too, K.Y, I remember seobang tell me about this Kwon Yuri, that I must avoiding her as far as I could, so I guess my seobang not really Kwon Yuri…maybe Kim Yoobin because she look bit charming and bit handsome. But the next, Jessica begin change her mind.

“It will be better if I sit next to her, instead Yuri since I already know her before too! We already know each other too, after all we spent so many time together, Sica and I! I bet Yuri wouldn’t mind it much!”

That’s voice not my seobang because it’s not warm as her but why she say that she already know me? Is she really my seobang? If she really my seobang why I didn’t get any signs from her and she not…this footstep…

From afar, Jessica could hear one familiar footstep coming closer toward her classroom while the other student didn’t notice this. But each step it’s make Jessica heart thumping in anticipating, something special make Jessica heart feel so full with joy.

Taeyeon looking at Yoobin with disbelieve eye and she standing glaring at Yoobin, this really ridiculous and where you when you need her, “What kind of nonsense that you sp—!” before she could finished what she want to say the back door open and Kwon Yuri enter the class with her usual nonchalant face also her signature expensive The ULTRASONE Edition 9 L-E headphone standby on her neck.

When Yuri enter the room, Jessica heart begin goes thump, thump, thump, fast and hasty but it’s not uncomfortable, because it’s so comfortable, fuzzy inside, and warm feeling. Her unconscious mind feels so secure and feels so right. She keep looking at this newcomer.

Why my heart beating so fast? Like there’s unexplainable feeling that keep pulling me toward this girl? Like something rightfully mine but so…untouchable for me? Like she put invincible wall in the middle of big abyss for me? Why I got this kind of feeling from someone stranger for me?

She takes a better look for Kwon Yuri, the last child of Kwon that she must avoid by any cost. Like the other Kwon, she really unnaturally beauty, unnaturally in here mean she not like any human and more like immortal. She’s so handsome with her sharp eye and tall lean body, y muscular but not too over and not too skinny, girl with so masculine charm or she just too handsome to be girls but to pretty to be boys.  

“Ah, Kwon Yuri! Let’s change our seat because Jessica here need someone she know for warming up with her new school and that’s person is me! So, I need to be her seatmate and help her to adapting with new environment here and her seat is vacant seat next to your seat!”

Yuri not even bothers a spare glance at Jessica, she just smiles with her usual stoic smile. “Change place with you? I’m not mind changing my seat but obviously not with you, since your seat far to front for my liking” she grabs her bag and walk to another vacant spot, corner of room near the window.

That voice sound just like my seobang voice but her voice really cold, monotone, apathy and so robotic without any feeling at all, my seobang voice really warm, soothing, tranquil, genuine, serene and sincere for me. When she talking to me like white fluffy feather warping around me, while with this Kwon Yuri…like I’m being surround by thick wall made from endless ice. Is she just someone that just has same voice like my seobang or she really my seobang?

Jessica torn between two of them, but when wind blowing and she caught the familiar scent from Yuri even when her scent cover with chlorine, the same perfume that used by her seobang. Before she could do anything, Yoobin already take her hand guiding her to her seat.

When Yoobin took her hands, she immediately realize that Yoobin not her seobang. Her touch not my seobang, the feel when she touch me…unlike, my seobang…she comes as rough and careless, when seobang…she took my hand so lovingly and protective.

Jessica keeps looking at Yuri who busy with her magazine, she is indeed my seobang but why she change so much? Is she really my seobang but why she ignores me like that? Why…my heart feel hurt but at the same time happy? Is she really my seobang?

Yuri herself already closing her eye and want to doze off, but she couldn’t because of her team member. Because the tournament, the studies push back for sport, this for school pride after all, courtesy of stupid chairman bet with her rivals. Yoobin talking about many things with her, but none of that talk enter Jessica ears because she keep looking at Yuri and hear what Yuri talk to her friends.

When Yuri about to walk away with her team member, Jessica suddenly grabs her hands and making Yuri stop walking. This hand, this seobang hand!! I found my seobang! I found her!!!

Jessica immediately broke in wide smile because she know Kwon Yuri is her seobang, she sure that this person is her seobang. She hope when Yuri turn around she see her face, she will get to see Yuri smile or kind eye but sadly no. Yuri give Jessica one hard and cold stare that make Jessica taken back, eye that give warning about don’t get too close with her.

“Who are you that touching my hands without permission?” harshly Yuri yank her hands from Jessica, “Do refrain yourself for touching me, understand? I don’t even know who you are, that’s really rude!” again, one cold smile for Jessica.

Cold and harsh words coming from Yuri who walk away without looking back, slowly Jessica eye begin watering and crying in silence. Tiffany who couldn’t bear to see Jessica like this, slowly approach her and hugging her.

Why she being like this? She said when I finally can see she will…tell me…and wait for me…why? Is everything just act for her? Only sort of games for her? Is that all…why? Why I keep…wanting to reach out for her again and again even though she prohibited me from going near her? Why I keep only looking at her and…only wants her? What should I do?

--

I don't know how to laugh, I don't know how to forget

I'm a fool that knows no one but you

I loved you do much, I really loved you

If you leave me then what should I do?

Yuri who busy looking data of her team and other school swimmer while her team member swimming around, “Jiyeon-ah, tell your girlfriend Hara she need do more weight training and some running! I know she skip it so many time. Also, tell that too Hyuna, Amber, and Sunhwa! IU, please make their diet schedule…they eat too many junk food and instant food now! Don’t forget to watch over them with strict manner, permission to use whip for discipline reasons being granted too!”

“So I will participate on 200M butterfly and 200M backstroke, also 400M Individual Medley as freestyle? Hm, okay that’s enough for me and we—!”

But someone grab Yuri clipboard and give Yuri hard shove, making Yuri almost fall down to water because Yuri sit on starting block. Yuri look up and to see Yoobin, behind her there’s Jessica and the others.

“Captain!!!” all Yuri swimming member ready to pounce Yoobin or maybe kill her, their ex-captain. Even Yoona preparing herself to pounce on Yoobin. But Yuri just gives them sign to continue their training.

“How dare you to make my baby crying like that?!! Don’t you have any shame?! Making her crying? Don’t you have any manners that teach you how to speak politely with someone!!! I wouldn’t let you to hurt my Sica like that!!” Yoobin yank Yuri by shoulder because Yuri wear short wetsuits, Yuri just smirking because she know this how Yoobin plan to make her look like hero in front of Jessica.

Also plan to make her bad and weak in front of Jessica eye. When Yoobin want to punch her, Yuri grab her fist that mere inch hit Yuri nose. She wouldn’t allow everything goes on Yoobin way, she can be bad like what Yoobin want but not weak.

“Look at where you standing, this swimming club…you clubless person. One wrong move and one alert from me…like this” with her free hands Yuri snapping her finger, every member immediately submerge from water and they look like Spartan solider that ready to fight. “You will be dead meat floating in the middle of our pool”

Yuri pushes Yoobin into the pool and she herself kneeling near Yoobin, she holding Yoobin head and pushing Yoobin head down. These of course make Yoobin nose submerge into the water, Yuri just give her cold and evil smirk.

While Yoobin trashing around in the water, Yuri took her own time for torturing Yoobin. Secretly looking at Jessica, watching her reaction. Satisfied make Jessica look scare at her, she smirking. But her heart feels so hurt, it’s feel like she just make someone disappoint with her.

“You don’t have any club to backing you up and you don’t want this become war between clubs again, right? As I remember, last time you almost die because of soccer club, right? Even your cousin didn’t help you that time. We, swimming club can bring you to hospital because fractured bone or worse, even though we only do weight training and running on treadmill…we pretty strong!”

With her usual programmed smile, easily Yuri yank Yoobin from water and throw her body near her friends, “Now go away please, my club want training with ease and also, have a snack, good day to you all!”

 

Jessica slowly close her eye and recall they day when Yuri brought her to classroom, slowly she trace her way when she open her eye she at Yuri old table before Yuri move to vacant seat at corner. “Sica-ah, here my seat…bit far away from teacher! Hehehe, I always sleeping through English and build tent when Arts!! Nice memory, nice escapade!” Yuri said while guiding Jessica to her seat.

“No wonder you so bad at English! Bad seobang! Don’t do that again, okay? Promise?”

Sit at cafeteria, seat that Yuri usually sit and enjoy her lunch time. Jessica knows Yuri always sit there eating and from the food she order she know that’s her seobang, also the way Yuri twirl her ring make it obvious that seobang that she search is Yuri. “What kind of food you always buy for lunch seobang?”

“Me, I always buy Green tea latte with double crème, less sugar and using soy milk! Next time, I will buy it for you, because that’s taste heavenly and I will give you to taste my favorite cake! For food, depend on my mood! Want to eat together next time?”

“Can I stay here and watch Yuri-ssi club?” Jessica plea at Tiffany who just smile and nodding. While Yoobin trying to butting the conversation, Taeyeon already held her shoulder and pull her back. She seem whispering something to Yoobin, by the way Taeyeon look with full of warning, it’s seem not something nice.

“I don’t have any club activity today so, why not? But we must ask her permission first, don’t worry…I will get her permission since, I’m her best friends!” Tiffany went to Yuri who talking and laughing with her team member. Yuri seem nodding at Tiffany and they seem joking about something, Tiffany come back with Yuri untouched cake.

“I manage to steal her cake!” Secretly she gives the cake to Jessica, when Yuri didn’t watch her.

 They sit at empty seat at pool, Yuri the first one arrives. She walking with her wetsuits cover by bathrobe and also wearing her slipper. She looks like hotel guest walking toward hotel swimming pool. Walking alone, checking the pool while flicking her ring and create familiar sounds. “Seobang? Are you waiting for something? You seem so restless!”

“Hm, how did you know I’m waiting for my magazine?” Yuri said while looking at Jessica, she once again flicks her ring.

“Secrets! What kind of magazine, seobang? Not some kind of byun magazine that Tiffany always hit Taeyeon when she but it, right?”

She look how Yuri laughing because of her team member, “Maybe…I’m fool person…fool person that only want her, her alone. I don’t know how to laugh when she not there beside me, when she not with me…I forget how to laugh or even smile but when she come to my dream, it’s feel my own lips formed smile automatically…even in dream or just my hallucination”

Jessica looking at Yuri swimming like tuna or fish, “I can’t forget her too, even when she treat me harshly or when she change so much. I can’t forget the care that she gives to me or affection or even herself, even for a bit…I can’t even forget my feeling toward her, even for a second…I can’t even forget her even when we only know each other in brief moment, not even half years!”

Tiffany and Sunny just sighed, Jessica just smile bitterly. “I know Yoobin not my seobang, I know and I don’t want to question why she doing that and all because it’s doesn’t matter to me, but I didn’t even look at Yoobin-ssi, for mere second my eye, heart, mind, even brain at my seobang alone…I don’t even know anyone else beside her”

“I don’t know how to love someone else, even when you teach me but I can’t and will never love anyone else beside her. I love her, I really love her and it will never change no matter what happen…if she like this to me, if she ignore me, avoiding me, and even leaving me…what should I do? Just what did I do wrong? Is she like me because I’m blind? If that’s true…I will gladly sacrifice my eye again only to for her to be with me!”   

--

I can't die so I live, I live days without you

It hurts so much until I can't breathe

People tells me it's like that, That's the way you live

Why is it so hard that I feels like dying?

I'll wait, I will be here because I know that you are my last love

Don't forget, even if time flows, if you're coming, I'll never let you go

 

Jessica stays at Kwon manor because of Kwon family plea, save it from Yuri. She never saw Yuri, she trying to found Yuri wanting to see her, even just mere second. But, her room being locked and Yuri herself enter her own bedroom from garage using rope for climbing like tarzan.

Dinner, sometimes she eat with Boa, Alex and Shinae but sometimes she alone. Yuri? Please don’t ask. After dinner alone, she sit at living room alone while maids preparing tea for her. She just sigh, it’s not different when I’m alone…

Before, I have nothing to fear, whatever I’m alive or die after operation but when she come, my seobang come I want to live. Even when I want to die now, I can’t but I live without her now, what’s the difference now?

It’s hurt so much even more than what they did to me after papa and mama dies…

The maids put her tea, they couldn’t help but notice the way Jessica clutching her heart. The maids begin to worries, Jessica already like their own family. “Miss Jessica? May we ask what happen? Did you sick or anything bothering you?”

Jessica looks up and slowly shaking her head, the maids already middle-age only smile warmly at her. Jessica notice black shinny grand piano, “That’s piano…it’s been a while since Master Yuri played it! She always play it when someone sad, if she’s home we will ask her to play it for you!”

Jessica smile bitterly, “Will she play it for me? I’m just nothing to her and she even…”

“She will play it, Master Yuri very kind! She really concern with us as family, sometimes when she free from any assignment from school, she will play it for us any song that we like! We even make request list for her and she will gladly play it even learn it before!”

She remember, her seobang tell her about Kwon Yuri being jerk, Yoobin said Yuri is source of misfortune and good-for-nothing human being that need to be avoiding as far as you can get, the action that Yuri give at school…she need confirmation.

“Can you…tell me about Yuri-ssi? Please?”

The maids smile at her, “She is the last kids from kwon, the kids that already shouldering big name and responsibility since beginning. But she nice kids with warm heart even when her face can be very arrogant and highty mighty with lack of empathy kind of face. But she caring person! She’s good hearted person but sometimes she has that kind of heavy and thick charismatic aura around her!”

Jessica just smile, “When I’m still blind girl, there’s someone from my class come to visit me every day and accompany me, I never know her name because she want to give me surprise of encourage for my operation…but when I come to her school, she change into someone different…I can’t forget this person and I keep loving her? It’s so painful and so hard but I don’t mind it…why?”

The maids just give Jessica knowing smile, “That’s how we lives in this world, it’s sad and painful but we couldn’t help but to fight for them! Please, don’t give up for her because she still love you too!” with that the maids bowing and leaving Jessica.

She walking and stop in front of Yuri bedroom, she know Yuri not home yet. Slowly she sits in front of her room and lean her back on the door. She waiting for Yuri, even though she know Yuri never open the door and use her secret way to enter her bedroom, but she keep waiting for Yuri.

Yuri-ah, I keep waiting for you…no matter how hard you push me I will be there waiting for you. I will be beside you, so when you need me if you come back, I will be there and never let you go…my first and last love. No matter how long and how many times for me to wait for you…

Knowing Jessica already sleeping at this times, Yuri return home and heading toward her bedroom. She almost fall back when she seen something in front of bedroom door. Her heart broke when she sees Jessica sleeping with leg tucked near her chest and shivering because of cold.

“Why are you doing this to yourself?”

Softly she carries Jessica to her bedroom and feeling familiar warmth Jessica unconsciously snuggle close to Yuri body, softly tuck her with blanket and stare at Jessica with her sad eye. Touching Jessica hair and when she about to touch Jessica face, Yuri retract her hands and smile sadly.

“What else do I have to do that to make you hate me and left me?”     

--

The steps I took when I left is painful

Because leaving like this I won't be able to see you again

Those good memories keep blinding my eyes

Tears are filling up and I hold your arm

But our love must end here

These memories that are still breathing, I won't forget them

My heart hurts so much that I can't take it

"I'm sorry", there's nothing I can say but this

After practice Yuri stay behind to checking swimming pool again and take a quick shower. After freshen up and ready to heading home, when she open the door Jessica already in front of her and seem waiting for her. Yuri who walking with her moonwalk mix shuffle dance stop immediately.  

“Seobang-ah…”

Yuri expressions begin to change, “I’m not your seobang, Jung-ssi! Can you move away? You blocking my way and this place restricted for non-member! You shouldn’t be here!” Yuri harshly push Jessica away and make Jessica fall, but Yuri didn’t care and she just walks away.

Loud bang Yuri close the door, when she walk…her eye feel so burning but the pain in her eye couldn’t compare with the pain in her heart when she heard soft sobbing from Jessica. Every step like a knife, slicing her heart without any mercy and every sobs from Jessica like salts that being thrown at her wound.

It’s hurt so much, I don’t know avoiding you can be this hurt…even when I already think it through carefully, calculating the pain and outcome of my action but why it’s still hurt so much.

When my hand push her body, I could feel that she so skinny now and so light…I’m so scared when I push her, I will broke her away…shattering her with my strength…but my hands feel so relaxed when our body touched…

“I’m sorry, Sica…baby. I’m sorry…” but our love must stop here…

When Yuri arrive at her car, Yoobin already waiting for her with her usual annoying smile while Yuri just walking to her car with usual stoic face. “You really good actor, even our top actor nothing compare to you!! Must I give you applause or award?”

“What do you want? You are free to make pass for her and I don’t have any business with her again!” Yuri said while pushing Yoobin from her car. But Yoobin grab her collar and smirking.

“Wait, we need to talk…let’s just say I didn’t satisfy to enjoy my win against you because of this Jessica blind Jung!” Yoobin held Yuri shoulder making Yuri stop dead in her track, “But, you see this blind girl playing hard to get and seem still attached to you! Can you do something about this? Like, make her fall for me instead trying to proof that you are her seobang! That’s get so annoying for m now! Whenever I talk to her, she ignores me like dust! Whereas she just blind get who get epic luck that make her s—!!”

Yoobin couldn’t finish her word because Yuri hands already dangerously near her face…not fist but palm, but that’s enough to make her stop talking because of taken back. “It’s your own trouble for being incompetent to do something, deal with it by your own! I don’t have any business with you anymore!”

“Deal it with my own way? Should I do the same thing with her too? You know what I mean and you must be know where this going to be, right? Also, you said that word just like you said to me before, with the same exact tone and maybe that eye too!”

Yuri stops her track, clenching her teeth before reply it with cold, “Whatever”

Yuri drive around Seoul, when she pass their favorite Chinese restaurant she remember how she feeding Jessica mantou, slowly the tears dam broken and she let her tears falls. She crying without any sound and she just let her tears fall freely, without any intention to wipe her own tears she just driving, wants to forget Jessica.

But every road she take always remind her of Jessica, “I guess, as long as I breath that memories will always remain with me…always and I will never forget that sweet memories but please, never…don’t give your concern on me anymore…please…just ignore this coward trash…android who couldn’t even utter single word to save one person live…”

 

Come back my sad love

As long as my heart breathes, I'm calling for you

I have to say this to you, I love you so much, do you hear these words?

I love you, don't leave me behind because I know that you are my last love

Even if someone else comes, it can only be you, I won't let go of you

While Jessica sobbing on swimming team locker room, Yoobin come to coaxing Jessica. She places her hand on Jessica shoulder and trying her best to get Jessica heart. “Why you so keen with that Kwon as your seobang, when she not? Because I’m your seobang! You should fall for me, remember?”

Jessica wipes her tears and give Yoobin sarcastic smile, “No, you are not my seobang! Tell me what you give to me when I success my operation? What did you promised me? Also what you give to me before I undergo operation?”

Yoobin just stared at Jessica, loss word for what she about to say while Jessica just smile bitterly, “Don’t bother to answer it because I know you are not my seobang. I might be blind and all, but I’m not stupid and I know my seobang…I have my own way to find her, please stop bothering me again. I’m sorry that I couldn’t return your feeling, just leave me alone, please!”

“Why you keep ogling at her? You should leave her alone and come to me!! I'm better than that android!!! I'm more perfect than those good-for-nothing trash!!! Since—!!”

Jessica turn around and give her smile, Yoobin seem satisfied when she seen this smile because she thinks Jessica will after her and all, “Tell me, how can you make someone stop breathing but still alive? Or how can you make the heart stop beating but still alive? Tell me and I will know how or what the way to stop loving her!”

When Yoobin about to rebutting, Jessica just softly shock her head and give her apologetic smile, “I don’t know why you want me but beside her, I will never accept anyone else and stop bad talking my seobang!”

She walking to her car drive by chauffeur, Yuri…is you that eager to push me away? But that’s kind of act won’t shaking my determination even a bit, after all I already face more worse than that, physically so this kind of half-hearted effort won’t affect me so much…so, as long as I’m still alive…I will keep calling for you!

I love you, I love you very much…I will say this countless time but please listen to it even just once. Do you hear it? Do you hear these words that tell you how much you mean for me even this just tip of my feeling?

 

 

-----------------

To Be Continue

 

Don't forget to give me some comment or anything! I'll be waiting for you!

I have a question, this chapter almost finish...maybe about two more chapter! What kind of stories do you want for next? Bit Drama or Bit Humor? Too lazy for making poll...