He opened the door and made his way to the sofa where he decided to spend the remainder of his time. In two hours, he should be sober and in his right state of mind but he couldn't relax. Something was off...

 

"Gaho!" He hollered but there was no sign of movement.

 

"Gaho! C'mere boy, Gaho!" He called again and stopped when he saw a figure trudging out of the kitchen.

 

"Hey buddy," He reached out to pet his dog but Gaho growled and looked away then set himself on the floor as if giving Jiyong the cold shoulder.

 

"Why are you so mad?" He asked the dog like he could speak back. Gaho turned and stared at Jiyong. He barked at him then walked, motioning Jiyong to follow him.

 

He stood up and followed his dog who lead him inside his bedroom.

 

He saw Gaho sitting in front of the bed as if he was waiting for someone. He jumped on to the bed and flattened himself out on it. 'Ah, such a beautiful bed' he thought but then..

 

Wait. Something was missing. He could tell something was missing but he just couldn't--

 

"Summer. Where's Summer?"

 

He looked around and noticed that her things were gone. What? When was the last time that he saw her? Last weekend? Right? Did she leave without telling him? Wha--

 

Ouch. His head throbbed and he could no longer concentrate on anything but the pain.

 

"I'll see her on the weekend anyway." He said and placed his fingers on his temples. He tried his best to lull himself to sleep. Maybe it was the alcohol or the weed that was running through his system, but he couldn't ignore the tugging feeling that was reeling at the back of his mind.

 

He fell asleep thinking that he’d see her on the weekend, but he never did.

 

-----

 

He woke up to the sun shining down on his face. It was a good day. How could it not be a good day when it was the weekend and it was his birthday?

 

He couldn’t help but smile, and think of what his girlfriend had in store for him. His past birthdays came into mind. Their first year together, Summer baked him a small cupcake. She wasn’t the best baker, but she promised that on his next birthday she’d bake him a bigger and better cake. It wasn’t the cupcake that made his birthday special. Summer’s gift was that constant reminder that no matter how messed up he had led his life before, no matter how many screw ups he got himself in, there was now one person who believed that he could do better--that he could be better. 

 

 

He was finally awake now, all of the memories that stirred in his mind made him fully conscious. He stretched his arm to feel the body beside him but there was no one there.

 

'What?' He thought. He peeped an eye open and saw that he was alone.

 

He sat up and stretched, then he hollered for her.

 

"Baaabe?" He spoke in a loud voice.

 

"Are you here?" He spoke again, and again he only got silence.

 

This wasn’t a regular practice. He usually woke up before Summer.

 

‘Oh, she’s probably planning something. I wonder what it is this year,” he pondered.

 

As much as he wanted to skip work because it was his birthday, he needed to focus on something other than his girlfriend’s surprise. He knew that the surprise event would probably happen at night, after he comes home from work, “No point in remaining idle,” he said aloud before heading to the bathroom and getting ready for work.

 

He didn’t dress up for his day job today, instead he dressed up for his night occupation. Instead of heading up the blue collar district, he headed for Hongdae; where the underground rappers thrive--where he supposedly thrived.

 

 

It was too early for any performance in Hongdae, but he knew where to go to have fun. 

 

He arrived at his intended destination and knocked on the door, looking right and left if anyone was there to see what he was doing. 

 

After what Jiyong felt was eternity, the door opened. 

 

“What’s up, bro? It’s been a long time. I thought you were off it?” The man who everyone knew as Rai asked Jiyong.

 

“Someone told me ‘You never really leave it. Eventually, we all come back.’" He said, quoting Shota.

 

Rai nodded. "So, you gonna let me in or what?” Jiyong asked hastily.

 

“As long as you got the dough, you’re always welcome here,” Rai said with a smirk.

 

Jiyong reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a few hundred dollars worth of bills.

 

When he entered that door, he was no longer Jiyong-- he was GD. 

 

“The strongest stuff you’ve got, Rai,” GD announced as he made himself comfortable on the couch.

 

“Partying mood, I see,” Rai said with no hint of judgement. He usually never judged people. It came with his services. As long as the customer had the cash, he’d be their best friend.

 

“Let’s see, I’ve got the black liquid, the weed, the white powder..." Rai listed down for GD.

 

“You know I’m a working man, Rai. I can’t be seen with needle marks." He said.

 

"So..." Rai asked him what he wanted to be sure.

 

"I’ll have a couple ounces of the white powder,” GD announced.

 

Rai reached into his pockets and dug out 2 small bags of what seemed like harmless powder and handed it to GD.

 

Rai didn’t have to tell GD how to use it, it wasn’t his first time.

 

“Hey, the birthday boy wants you to do a line too,” GD offered Rai.

 

“Naw man, I’m good. I’m on an organic diet for now. only,” Rai explained.

 

“Suit yourself,” GD said, as he opened the packets on Rai’s glass coffee table and took one of the razors scattered around the table to expertly grind the . He rolled up a twenty dollar bill and placed it right before the line of started. He took a sharp inhale, and just like magic the line of magically disappeared from Rai’s coffee table and reappeared in GD’s blood system.

 

‘Happy birthday, Ji. You’ve survived another year,” he greeted himself.

 

He did the same routine until he finished the whole content of each packet. Rai knew that nobody should ever consume that amount of that fast, but he knew better than to take away the drugs of an already drugged up man who’s holding a razor blade. 

 

He woke up out of sorts. He checked his watch: ‘8:00pm’ it read. He had out for 12 hours. He checked his phone. Still no calls from ‘his’ Summer. 

 

‘Maybe she’s not yet done preparing,’ he thought to himself.

 

He shrugged off any nagging feeling he had of the fact that it had been almost 24 hours and his girlfriend had not contacted him once, and chalked it up to the after-effects of .

 

He left Rai’s house and started walking to the place where he supposedly thrives.

 

“Might as well get a few raps in,” he said aloud before entering the club.

 

He did a few too many rap battles because the next time he checked his phone it was already midnight and still no call from Summer. 

 

He left the club feeling elated for winning all of the rap battles he entered in, but the longer he walked the more he thought of how crappy a girlfriend could be if she never greeted her boyfriend a “Happy Birthday!”. 

 

It was then that he decided he’d give Summer a piece of his mind.

 

He hailed a cab and told the driver to head to this address.

 

----

 

He thought about many things as he was on his way to her place. He hadn't seen Kimiko since the last time, and the last was a long time ago. He tried to look for her but then he finds out that she went back to Japan. Not even so much as a goodbye. Shota told him she wasn't a person who got attached, so he shouldn't take it personally that she left without seeing him.

 

"I guess that's over," he said to himself.

 

He wasn't sad, but maybe he just felt like that make believe world he was in was finally at an end. It was fun while it lasted, but now it was time to get real. ‘Wait, why am I even thinking about her?’ he thought.

 

After fantasizing over her, he realized just how stupid he was. He had a girlfriend for Christ's sake. What the hell was wrong with him? How long had he been cheating? It was as if a bucket of ice cold water was poured over him and he only just woke up.

 

"Holy crap, I am one dead mother ing piece of ," he whispered under his breath. She wasn’t going to kill him, she wouldn’t even know about it, but he was going to have to live with the guilt the rest of his life. The stupidity of his actions were enough to choke the life out of him. How could he have done this to her? Why? He wished the earth beneath his feet cracked and swallowed him up alive. ‘Why am I so stupid? Stupid, stupid, stupid!’

 

Instead of coming over to her place for giving a lecture about being a lousy and ignorant girlfriend, he’d be coming over to make amends, though in his heart he knew that nothing would would ever make up for what he did; and how on earth was he going to make amends for this??

 

The cab stopped, he paid the driver, he ran out.

 

He made his way up to her unit and knocked.

 

"Babe," He called out for her.

 

"Babe, open up." He said.

 

"Come on, don't be mad." He banged on the door, but she didn't open it.

 

'God damn it, why won't you just open up?' He thought and started twisting the doorknob.

 

Twisting it? --he turned it again, and he discovered it was open.

 

His brows furrowed in confusion. "Why isn't her door locked?" He muttered under his breath.

 

He turned the knob slowly and pushed the door open. He cautiously stepped foot inside her home. He truly was in for a surprise today for what he saw gave him a shock.

 

 She wasn't there.

 

He looked around and discovered everything was gone. Her unit was stripped bare, save for the sofa on the edge of the room.

 

"What the ," he cussed. His eyes went wide. He didn't know what was happening, he didn't know where she was; he didn't know anything.

 

How could he not know anything about his girlfriend?

 

He backed up to a corner and sat on the floor. He drew his knees closer to him and rested his elbows on them, then he buried his face in his palms.

 

"No, no, no." He kept repeating. He couldn't believe she was gone. 'Why did she leave??' He thought.

 

Then an idea popped into his head.

 

"It's just the drugs. I'm delusional now, because of the drugs." He stopped what he was doing and laughed. He stretched his long legs forward and rested his arms at his sides. It must be the drugs.

 

He heard footsteps on the side and looked to see a figure approaching him. See, it was her. It was just the drugs...but then the figure spoke. It was  a man's voice. 

 

He looked up in confusion. Instead of seeing his girl's pretty face, he saw a man.

 

"What are you doing here?" The man asked.

 

"I'm looking for the person who lives here. Would you know where she is?" Jiyong asked.

 

"She's gone." The man said.

 

The whole time he was there, Jiyong was suspicious of him. And what did he mean she was gone? Who was this guy?

 

He just had to ask for it was eating him up inside. "Who are you?"

 

"That's none of your business." The man's tone was cool, but you could see in his face that he wasn't. His glare was cold and hard, and in his eyes was anger, fury. Why was the man mad? 

 

Jiyong's temper sparked. He hated it when people gave him attitude and as far as he was concerned, he's never even seen the man before. He stood up and trudged over to where the man was and he stared him square in the eye.

 

"It's my business that you're making yourself comfortable at my girlfriend's house." Jiyong said and shoved the man to the wall, only to be shoved back by the man himself.

 

"You'll do well to know your place," venom laced the man's words as he spoke.

 

Jiyong took a swing at him, but the man dodged, causing Jiyong to stumble out of balance. He fell to the floor. It took the man all his strength and will not to kick Jiyong in the stomach; instead, he squatted down so they were face to face.

 

"You listen here, and you listen well." The man said. Jiyong just glared at him.

 

"I would love to beat the crap out of you, but I promised that I wouldn't." The man started.

 

"...but I'm pretty sure what I'm going to say next will hurt you just as much." This caught Jiyong's attention.

 

"Don't look for her, forget about her, pretend like she never even existed, because she is doing the exact same thing. Your relationship? It never existed. You two never happened." He said.

 

No, no, she couldn't have left him. This was some sick prank. Someone must have a vendetta against him. This wasn't real and he wouldn't believe it.

 

"That's a lie. She'd never do that. She loves me--" he said but was cut off.

 

"LOVES YOU? Hah! Who gives a if she loves you?! You guys aren't together! Her deal is off.--" The man said but was silenced as Jiyong tackled him.

 

"That isn't true!" he yelled at the man. The two roughed it out on the floor, with the bloody victor being the stranger.

 

The man, not left unhurt by Jiyong, stood up and brushed his busted lip. 

 

"You'll do as I say and you're going to stop chasing Summer." That was that, he turned to leave.

 

 

 

Jiyong stood up but saw a piece of paper that he picked up anyway and walked his way over to the couch where he sat and spent the 

remainder of his night.

 

As he got comfortable, for he still believed everything that he saw was an illusion, he straightened out the piece of paper and read it. It was a note from her. He guessed it must've been a 'happy birthday, I'm sorry I wasn't able to tell you I left town for a while' memo, but it wasn't. It was much worse. He read it again and again until he could comprehend what the simple words meant.

 

Jiyong, things haven't been going too well between us.

 

I feel like we're drifting apart. I'm trying my best but you

 

Something's wrong with us.

 

I love you Ji, I just don't like the way you are now.

 

I can't be with you anymore.

 

                 -Summer

 

 

His body hurt from where he got hit, but it didn't hurt as much as the emotional pain that was starting to stir within him. 

 

"It's just a dream, it's a bad dream. It's all just a dream..." He told himself repeatedly.

 

He curled himself into a ball and tried to repress the hurt he was starting to feel, instead of taking it out. He didn't feel like punching or kicking anyone. He didn't feel angry or upset. He was just sad, and it was all his fault. Was this the consequence of his actions? He thought it was.

 

He fell asleep on her couch with the notion that everything would be back to normal once he woke up. He'd be back in his bed with Summer in his arms. There. That was the real world, she was his world. He'd wake up to his world tomorrow, that was for sure.

 

 

 

 

He thought he'd wake up in a better place, a sane place, but he never did. The moment he opened his eyes, he was at her apartment with a busted lip and a bruised face. He saw the sheet of paper.

 

"So everything last night did happen," he scoffed. But then that scoff turned into a grimace and that grimace turned into a frown, a deep frown. Then he started to tear up and he let himself cry. He pitied himself. He was disgusted by what he did. How could he have let his past get to him? How could he have been such a douche? He was a jackass. This was the consequence of his actions.

 

 

He settled himself and after he calmed down, he figured the best place he should be in right now was at his house. She was gone, after all. He had no more business here.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

a/n

It's official. You guys are awesome. I got so many subs. thank you so much!  <3