We, ShijieShou, were on the elevator with Yunho and Changmin. Our recording schedule ended at the same time that day and so, like always, we’re heading out togther.

“Can you guys drop us off at our place?” Jine asked.

“Sure, no problem. I’ll tell our manager,” Yunho replied. “Will you guys have your dinner at home? Are you going to cook for them?” He poked at me.

Changmin’s face lit up at the mention of eating, “Can we also have dinner at your place?”

“Uhm..actually, no—” I started.

“Yah. We’ll be driving you home anyway,” Changmin reasoned instantly.

“It’s not that. I’m having dinner at my uncle’s place,” I explained. In my mind I hoped that they wouldn’t ask why or if we’ll have guests.

But Yunho nonchalantly asked, “Is there a party at your uncle’s place? Aren’t Haru and Jine invited?”

Haru kept silent, so as Jine, which was a relief to me because he might say something unnecessary.

“Just a simple dinner. I’m not quite sure though who else were coming,” I said. In my mind I expressed my apology to Yunho for lying about that last sentence. Then as if to ease my guilt, I exclaimed, “You guys should have dinner with us sometime again soon. My family would love that, I’m sure. Besides they love inviting people for dinner.”

Yunho smiled. Changmin, too. He probably remembered their last dinner there.

We reached the basement parking lot then walked towards our respective cars. We said our goodbyes as we parted, but Haru excused himself to walk me to my car first.

He then said to me, “Say our hi to them, okay?”

“Whose hi?” I joked.

“Mine and Jine, of course. You didn’t tell them, how could they say hi,” he rolled his eyes on me.

“Right, right.”

“Drive carefully, okay? See you later at home.” He then closed my door after I got in.

Less than an hour later I parked in front of my uncle’s gate, behind a red sleek car. I got off and before I even got to open the gate, my cousin had already jumped out of it.

“Unni! I really love Appa tonight. They are here!” said my fan-girl cousin.

“Yah! You weren’t this jumpy when Yunho and Changmin were here,” I pretended to snap at her.

“But they are my bias! And yours, too! Do you think we can get them to sing for us tonight? And you know why I was prim and proper that other time..”

“Fine, fine. Jine—I should have invited him, too,” I said with a teasing smile.

She poked me. “I am simply a JYJ fan, okay?”

“Whatever. They’re here already?”

‘Yep. If I didn’t come out here I’m probably drooling over them already.”

“They're that handsome tonight?” I asked. The fan-girl in me is starting to wake up, too.

“See them for yourself.” And with that we both giggled. But I stopped myself. I am not a teenager anymore. Besides these guys are my friends.

I literally shook myself as if to shrug off the giggly feelings. Then I followed my cousin inside.

My uncle welcomed me. “I thought you’ll giggle out there all night. Come. Let’s start our dinner.” I nodded.

When I got in the dining area, I greeted our guests and they greeted me back. I sat down between my cousin and Yoochun.

“Jal mokesumnida!” We all said together.

My aunt passed me a bowl, “Try this. Jaejoong-ssi brought this. He cooked it for us.”

“Wow,” my cousin reacted ahead of me. “You can really cook. You should try unni’s cooking, too. She’s really good.”

“Really? Maybe next time we can try it,” Jaejoong said.

I smiled and tasted the food.  I was about to say it was really delicious when my cousin spoke again, “Yes, you really should. It’s too bad that she can’t come early today to help prepare the food. When Yunho oppa and Changmin oppa came here, she helped to cook the food and they said it was really good.”

I laughed out loud, but in an obvious awkward tone. I shoved food on . “Hahaha~ Jaejoong’s food was really good. Try it. It’s good right?”

I turned to Jaejoong, “This is really good. You should tell me how you cooked this. I’d love to have this again.”

“I’ll just show you how some time,” Jaejoong answered.

The rest of the dinner went well. We had to head home just minutes after we were done because it was already late. We were walking out when my uncle spoke up, “Jaejoong-ssi, you live in Jamshil right? Raya’s heading that place, too. Why don’t you just ride with her so Yoochun will just have Junsu to drop off. You aren’t planning on another eat-out tonight right? You guys need to rest.”

Jaejoong turned from him to me, the same time I turned also from my uncle to him. As if I heard him ask if it’s okay, I said, “It’s fine with me if it’s okay with you.”

Junsu seconded, “I think that’s a good idea.” He then turned to Yoochun, “You can actually just drop me off at my parent’s tonight. It’s nearer here so you can get home faster.”

It was as if Junsu and Jaejoong knew a reason why Yoochun had to be home early, that Jaejoong, too, said, “Fine with me. But can I drive instead?” He asked me.

“Uh..” I started, but my uncle answered for me. “Oh, about that. She doesn’t let anyone else drive her car. Just argue with her about that next time. You kids head home now.” He waved his hands at us as if shooing us away.

“Okay,” was all Jaejoong able to say.

Yoochun and Junsu walked over the the red car and Jaejoong and I went to my moss green car. I was greeting myself ‘Merry Christmas’ when I notice how our cars’ color matched that season when Jaejoong spoke, “Can’t I really just drive instead?” He was leaning on my car roof on the passenger side.

I simply smiled at him then got onto the driver’s seat. Seconds after he was also inside the car.

“You are really weird,” he said as he put on his seatbelt and then I drove. Then he reached forward to turn on the music.

However, we were both surprised when the music came on. I forgot that my current playlist was their The Secret Code album—Kiss the Baby Sky was the song that played. I coughed.

“You weren’t joking when you said you were a fan, huh?”

“So you didn’t believe me even after a hundred times that I’ve declared that?”

“I did, but—never mind. I miss singing this song.” I didn’t know what to say. Should I say that was what Yunho said, too when he heard that song the last time he was in my car, too?

“Uhm, what's with the urgency to send Yoochun home?"  I asked, unable to keep my curiosity to myself.

"Oh that.  It's just that we could tell he has some songwriting to do.  You noticed how he was spacing out during dinner right?”  I nodded to that.  I wanted to ask more about Yoochun but Jaejoong spoke again, changing the topic, unfortunately.

“So you’ve never let Yunho or Changmin drive your car, too, before?”  Seems like I wasn't the only one who can't get hold of my curiosity.

At the same time, I was surprised at him saying Yunho and Changmin’s names. Still, I was able to answer, “Of course. Not even Haru nor Jine.”

I thought he’s going to ask why but instead, “Hey, can you stop by that convenience store, I want to buy something.”

“Sure.” I parked on the road side. He quickly got off. After a couple of minutes, he was back, with six cans of beer. I eyed him, “Did you run out of those at home?”

“Nope. I still have some on my fridge. But it would be a hassle to get them then walk back out to the playground just to drink.” I frowned at his explanation. I continued to drive.

“Where exactly do you live again?” I asked. He gave me the address. “Are you serious? You live one block away from us!”

“Really? What a small world. So you know that nearby playground where no one really comes to play?”

“Of course. It’s a sanctuary at night.”

“Right. It’s really a good thing that almost everyone in our neighborhood were elders. They are asleep by 8pm.”

We both laughed. I drove straight to that playground. There wasn’t anyone around. I got off along with Jaejoong and we each sat on a swing.

“Haru, Jine and I often bring out our ramyeon and eat it here when we are bored at home,” I shared.

“You also come here with Yunho, right?” Jaejoong asked. I stared at him.

“I saw you twice here already. The first time, I was really surprised to see him here. I thought he had a girlfriend who lived around here. I didn’t recognize you. The second time, which I didn’t really expect to come, I drove here and I found you seated at this same spot. Since I was in my car, I got to spy longer on you.”

“Spy?” I laughed at his choice of word.

“Are you and Yunho in a relationship?”

“You are totally getting it wrong. How will I put this?”

“Are you going to say you just have an oppa-dongsaeng relationship?”

I laughed again. “It was more like noona-dongsaeng,” I joked. It was now his turn to stare at me. “But seriously, no we are not. Yunho is not close only to me, but also to Haru and Jine but they are just not into walking while talking that much. We walk when we need to relieve ourselves from stress. And this place is really a conducive one.”

He was still staring at me. He was about to say something again when— “Raya-ah! I knew you’d be here.” It was Haru.

“Haru! How did you know I’m here?”

“Uncle called earlier to say you were already on your way home and that you were with Jaejoong.” He nodded at Jaejoong. “You were supposed to be at home already 30 minutes ago. I thought you probably decided to come here for a while. I went out to see since I also wanted to sit here for a while.”

“Sorry I kept her out here,” Jaejoong apologized.

“It’s not big deal, really. She always does this anyway.” Haru then noticed a beer on Jaejoong’s hand and the other unopened cans on the ground. “Are you drinking with him, Raya?”

“Of course not. You know I don’t drink. He bought that for himself.”

“That’s right. But would you like to have some?” Jaejoong then threw one can at Haru which the latter caught flawlessly.

“So what are you two been talking about?” Haru asked.

“Yunho,” we answered at the same time. Realizing that, we both laughed.

Jaejoong then said, “So, tell me, how’s Yunho and Changmin these days?”

Haru and I hesitated to say anything at first. As for me, I thought, will he get himself drunk while hearing the stories we could tell? If I am to tell him anything I want it to be a comfort, a hope for him and not any other else.

Haru spoke, “They are getting along well, but still not well enough. You see, I think, like you, though they moved on, a part of them still could not resign to the fact that you guys aren’t in any real relationship with each other right now.”

I heard Jaejoong opened another can. I don’t know if is eyes were reddish because of the beer he had or because of nostalgia. I didn’t ask.

Haru spoke again, “I think it’s time you guys stop dragging the company and our president in this matter. I am now telling you he is not holding them back against you. Yunho and Changmin has their own reasons but it is not for me nor for Raya to explain them to you. Just talk, okay?”

“Will they really come if we ask to meet with them?” Jaejoong asked, his head bowed.

“It’s for you to find out,” Haru answered. Jaejoong sighed.

“Jaejoong-ssi..” I called to him but, again, somebody else came.

“Yah! What is taking you so long here? Oh, Raya! So Haru was right that you’ll be here.” It was Jine. I smiled at him. He turned back to where he came from, waved then shouted, “They’re here! Come on. You only ate pizza, why are you walking so slow?”

Two guys arrived. “That’s the point, we only ate pizza. Why didn’t you have any other food at home? Can we go and eat more somewhere else? Or Raya, did you bring food from uncle’s house?”

As soon as that sentence ended, I watched Jaejoong’s head jerk up. “Changmin-ah.”

We all froze.