It started to feel useless. All those attempts to invoke his memory; to offset the growing flaw inside of him. There was no cure. He was just being the naive Yong Junhyung who went through every check-ups holding to the belief that someone out there would finally find a light in their researches.

They said even in the dark, there would be light, but “Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong. No matter how fast light travels, it finds the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it.”

And so, waking up to another day of only a nano of hope, Junhyung prepared himself to go out; to the hospital; to whatever level his flaw was on now; to another day where he was still waiitng for the light to come and catch up.

Junhyung was thankful Dr. Kim left countless calls to the concierge downstairs to remind the young man of his check-up appointment. He wouldn't be here, at the hospital, this morning if it wasn't for the concierge's countless intercoms reminding him he would be late to the check-up. And most of all, he was thankful that Yoon Doojoon guy was not there to be with his uncle and the poor patient.

After yesterday, he didn't even bother to look for the lost memories, not that he even could since he didn't know if he still had photo albums of his past. He figured he should just go to sleep last night, the thought to re-remember Yoon Doojoon... It somewhat gave a scary feeling to his part.

"Good morning, Junhyung-gun, how are you today?"

"I'm..." Junhyung found himself hesitating to reply, "...okay."

"Ready for today's MRI?"

"Uh huh."

"Do you.. still remember Yoon Doojoon from yesterday?"

Junhyung nodded.

"Ah, that's good..."

Good?

"...that means we still have a chance," said the doctor with an encouraging smile, "You'll be fine, Junhyung-ah."

Junhyung nodded again. He was going to agree on whatever Doctor Kim said. He was the only one who could help him.

"Then, let's do it."

I'm okay, Junhyung told himself.

Hate the noise and the captivating feeling of MRI. There was always a reason to never hope you'd get sick. Medical attempts, no matter how comfortable they told you it'd be, they were never able to reduce the anxiety of receiving the result.

Junhyung would not be receiving the test result until the next afternoon, so he knew he wouldn't be feeling very convenient for the few hours, but for now...

He the car engine and set up the GPS to home. He didn't have any plans figure out what he was going to do once he was home, but he didn't have any reasons to be somewhere else anyway. Unless, somebody showed up and dragged him.

Yoon Doojoon.

He was shocked to find that man showed up out of nowehere and knocked on his car window. He shivered the first few seconds he saw the man.

That Yoon Doojoon guy, he looked unrest. He seemed to be shouting, but Junhyung couldn't hear anything due to the soundproof car. Hesitantly, he rolled down the window.

"Yah, good thing you don't dare to dash off without listening to me first."

How rude.

"...Where are you heading?" asked Yoon Doojoon.

Confused, Junhyung wondered if he needed to answer him, but he didn't want to direspect anybody and beside, he was Doctor Kim's relative.

"Home...," Junhyung chose to answer.

"Delay that. Unlock your car. We need to talk-"

"Wait-"

"You need to know, Junhyung. I don't care what has happened to you, but you need to stop running away."

Junhyung gasped at Yoon Doojoon's words. The way that guy seemed to know him more than ever, started to scare him. Reluctantly he unlocked the foor and let the man stepped in.

"Let's start with ramyeon, Jun."

Twenty minutes later, Junhyung found himself in the ramyeon restaurant of Yoon Doojoon's choice. Two bowls had already been served on the wooden table

"Eat up."

Junhyung looked at the man sitting in front of him, confused.

"Just so you know, we used to eat ramyeon every Friday after soccer practice."

"I- I played soccer?"

Doojoon slurped down a spoonful of the soup before replying, "You seriously don't remember, huh?"

Junhyung looked down. He didn't know if this guy had always been like this, but he wondered how could he stand the guy's arrogant acts?

"You probably have known what happened to me," Junhyung said as he started digging into the hot ramyeon, "I don't know what your uncle told you-"

"I've known enough. I was actually...worried the first time I found out that you're my uncle's patient. My uncle is a neurologist and I know his patients have never been those who have light migraine, but I also didn't expect that you..."

"It's okay," said Junhyung. His voice was a little shaken as he tried to keep his composure. He had never discussed his illness with anyone else except Doctor Kim and to talk of such topic with some stranger was especially uncomfortable for him.

"No, it's not okay. Look, Jun, i'm sorry. I'm sorry for my rash act yesterday. It's just... Man, if you weren't like this, I could really beat you up and I bet no one would mind."

Junhyung secretly sighed in relief.

"You... Must be really hate me, huh?"

"I don't know. I am seriously in huge confusion right now," said Yoon Doojoon, putting down his chopsticks and resting both of his hand beside his bowl, "You're my best friend who went away four years ago and now that I finally meet you again, I don't know if I should be happy or mad. You, Yong Junhyung, you didn't just suddenly leave, you left a very hurtful message to her. Naeun, she's the one who was greatly affected by your disapperance. I mean, by God, you... You had proposed her!"

I had... What?

"Her parents had gladly accepted you to be a part of the family. You two had gone to see the priest. My mother had sketched the wedding dress. And I- I was ready to let go- argh!" Then Yoon Doojoon slammed the table, looking stressed.

Heads started to turn to Yong Junhyung and Yoon Doojoon's table. They probably wondered if a fight between these two men would break out because one of the guy looked absolutely pissed right now.

"Everything's fine, sorry, sorry, sorry...," said Junhyung, slightly bowing to all directions. He then turned to the man in front of him. "Look, Doojoon-ssi, I'm sorry, but-"

"Stop saying 'sorry', Junhyung-ah."

Junhyung started to get scared at the moment because this Yoon Doojoon guy suddenly turned sulky.

"It hurts me to see you like this. It hurts when I found out about your condition, but it really hurts me more seeing you being like this, so different from the Yong Junhyung I used to know."

Junhyung looked down upon hearing his words, didn't know how to respond. After all, how could he respond to something he...didn't know anymore?

"Jun," called Doojoon, "I'll help you."

Slowly, Junhyung rose his head. Yoon Doojoon was staring at him with flame in his eyes. Yet, in those, Junhyung noticed a slight sadness. It was a confusing expression, but Junhyung looked forward to what he had to say next.

"I'll help you to regain back your memory-"

"Doojoon-ssi, you know that's not really possible as I-"

"I know! But even though you'll forget eventually, you can't lose yourself. I... I will never let that happen. When the memory starts to fade, we'll make new one that is similar. I will not let you fight this alone, Jun. I will not give up on your condition. And I expect you to do so as well."

Stunned. Junhyung was petrified, really.

That distant feeling started to ease away. That tone, that stare, that sentence of Yoon Doojoon, they felt somewhat familiar, as if they had ever went through his hearing.

The fence that Junhyung had been holding for the last four years slowly crumbled. Perhaps, just perhaps, this Yoon Doojoon guy was right. As much as he refused to admit, as time passed by, he needed to stopped running.

The next minute after Junhyung told the other male, "So... You'd help me?", he told him to quickly finish his ramyeon because there was somewhere Junhyung needed to be. Puzzled, Junhyung followed anyway.

And there he was, in his own car, but he wasn't driving. Yoon Doojoon did, or Doojoon did. Junhyung figured he could stop mentioning his complete name everytime now that he had practically agreed to be the guy's best buddy, all over again.

It still felt weird, to be honest. He couldn't even believe himself right now. He just agreed to welcome back his past.

It wasn't like he didn't want to remember. He wanted so badly to know whatever had ever happened in his life, to at least know one damn thing about his favourites, his habits, his characteristic. But there were times; times when he thought it was better to let it be; he who couldn't recall anything. Because Yong Junhyung wasn't sure he had been a good person.

Because two things that he always felt everytime he tried to look back were guilt and sadness. 

I don't want to look back, to be truthful... I'm scared of what I might regain. Yet, I don't dare to look ahead either... I'm afraid of what would come.

to be me.

"Woah-"

"We're here," Doojoon said after abruptly stopped the car.

Junhyung looked around. Dark, although there were a few street lights. "Where are we?" Junhyung asked.

Doojoon turned off the engine, tossed the car key to Junhyung, and stepped out of the car. "You'll see," he replied.

Confused, Junhyung followed him anyway and get out of the car. He was soon welcomed by a view of what seemed like a neighbourhood park. "A Park..?"

"Nope," said Doojoon from his behind, "To this apartment. Come on, there is someone I want you to meet."

Junhyung turned around. An old-looking, around 20-floor, building stood in front of him. An apartment building just across a park, how nice. This seemed like a friendly neighborhood, which led Junhyung to predict they were not in the city center area anymore.

"You're not going to tell me who are we going to meet?"

"You'll find out soon."

Junhyung watched without a word as Doojoon led him to the lobby, passing an old man whom Junhyung reckoned as the security staff. Being the mannerful that he was, he bowed a bit. The old man returned him a smile.

"Yoon Doojoon-gun, right?," said the old man to Doojoon, "You bring a friend."

Doojoon nodded. "Yeah, this is Yong Junhyung, ahjussi. Is she...up in her unit?"

The old man gave them both a small nodd and pressed the elevator button. The next second, the elevator door was opened. Junhyung was about to ask which floor when Doojoon pressed the number 19 and stepped back, letting the elevator door to close.

Probably because it was old, the elevator moved slowly. It had been some time since Junhyung came to a place like this. The last few years, his life had been surrounded by minimalist building, downtown hustle, and upscale environment.

"So, it's a lady whom we are going to see?"

"Yeah."

"And she's gonna help...or whatever she can do...to help me?"

Doojoon looked at him and he caught a glimpse of sadness in his eyes. "I hope so, Jun."

The walk through the corridor was just as silent. 

It worried Junhyung, but he decided to keep quiet. To be truthful, he felt hopeless now and seemed like Doojoon was his only way out, so he laid low. I used to think there was nothing behind me that I should even bother to look, but then Doojoon came and invoked my interest on my own past. I'm reluctant, but I couldn't keep this feeling as if there was something unfinished.

"Here we are."

Junhyung stopped his track and looked up. 1904. Something was familiar.

He turned to see Doojoon pressing the bell. He didn't know why his heart beat suddenly raced at the thought of the homeowner appearance. The number, Doojoon, and the melodious voice of "Yes, coming!" from the other side of the door, all...felt familar.

"Doojoon, the lady you had been talking about-"

"Oh, hi, Doojoon! What brought you-"

Silence.

Eyes widened.

Nobody moves.

Son Naeun freezed in her place. Yong Junhyung held his breath. Yoon Doojoon tried to stay calm.

He had expected this to happen eventually. The day when fate played the re-run story of the three of them again.

Yoon Doojoon to the rescue! Or is he? I'm saving a lot for our "Seo Hyeonwoo" kekeke (btw, have any of you guys been watching IRIS 2? how is it?)

And finally I get to put Son Naeun back in the picture. I hope no one is disappointed with the female lead of my choice. If you do, feel free to let me know tho!