Ji hyo silently indulged her laziness today. She was still on her sleep wear lying on her back, spread eagled. Except for her wide open eyes staring at the ceiling blankly, one could say she’s still sleeping. It’s quite early. The sky still dark and the air chilly enough to need thick sweaters. Just perfect for dozing.

Sometimes people love each other… but not all of them choose to be together.

The female teacher tried to empty her brain unsuccessfully. Working hard not think of one particular person her insane mind insists on for unknown reason. One moment she’s resting comfortably then she’s suddenly very awake with a song playing in the background or rather, in her head with extra accompanying images of one man. She could have just gotten up early and go get some coffee but she’s actually too awake to need it yet. Besides, the thought of facing that man in person is not really appealing. There’s just this confusing feeling where she really wants to see him but at the same time dreads the idea of it.

And so Ji hyo lies there in her already made bed waiting for the alarm clock to go off. Who knows maybe she’s actually sleeping and will soon wake up to the shrill sound of the ticking device and forget all about the music video featuring Jong kook in her head. She does have the uncanny ability to forget dreams after all.

Some people find it hard to stay…

A groan of frustration escapes the teacher. She rolls to her side and slides down. For a while she just sat on the cold hard floor looking out the window. Whatever she saw made her sigh again, wearily, before she decides to end up moping (not that she’d admit to it) and start the day.

“Good morning Ms. Song.” the cook said with a strange smile in his face that made Ji hyo uneasy. Like the man knew something she didn’t. She shrugged the thought away and greeted the man back with faked sleepiness. No use making the other wonder why she’s not crawling from the dead while foraging for coffee like she actually does. The staring at the ceiling thing and music video in her head was not a dream, unfortunately, so she’s wide awake and alert.

The young scholars greeted her too and she waved at them cheerfully especially when a tall tumbler of milky and diabetes inducing sweet brown concoction was handed to her. Even if she’s not half-dead from sleep, she still loves coffee very much. A few large gulps later, to everyone’s amusement, the tumbler was emptied. In five swallows. The scholars totally counted and betted on how fast she could finish it and both students were off by a mile.

Ji hyo walked to her usual station and started chopping until she was lost in the simple task. Enough not to notice the others in which she was thankful for after spending the dawn staring at her ceiling. That lasted about ten minutes until a scent –warm, leather, sun, grass, safe, home – assaults her senses. She was so startled that she nicked her finger.

The pain was sharp and sudden that Ji hyo could only watch the crimson liquid blossom in her pale skin. Her senses confused with the hot burn of the cut and the effect of the smell to Ji hyo. It seemed time stretched longer but the event only lasted a few second.  Another pair of hands quickly found paper towels, which was gently dabbed on the wound. A chair was placed behind her so she automatically sat down.

The female teacher looked up the face of her rescuer, his scent much warmer and stronger now that he was so close. He sat on a low counter and leaned to inspect Ji hyo’s injury, putting his head on Ji hyo’s line of sight. He scrutinized the wound with a serious look, brows knitted in worry and shoulders tense. She could only stare, biting her lip in fear that she’d say something really stupid like how ridiculously the PE teacher’s hair is styled – she was the woman and yet his hair is even more meticulously, artfully messed up without looking like a nest. How it looked so soft as if inviting her to bury her fingers in the strands and it smelled nice. Sharp with a tang of sweetness. A combination of scent that only made him unique. Ji hyo knew she looked goofy enough but couldn’t help herself from cataloguing everything she could about the man.

After what felt like eternity of Jong kook examining Ji hyo’s finger and Ji hyo staring at Jong kook’s hair, he finally relaxed and stepped away to get Kyung soos’s first aid kit. She watched the other teacher walk, her gaze dropping to his rear accidentally. She would claim later that it was no fault of hers because the tight black pants hugging the man sinfully are surely scandalous.  Like how could he even move in those things?

Jong kook worked efficiently. He disinfected the wound, applied betadine then wrapped it in a Band-Aid. Then he looked at Ji hyo with a soft smile. “Next time, please be careful.” He mutters with mock admonishment. She nods then swallows. They were so close like that and it was the closest his face had been in her personal space.

 Actually, it was the closest a man had gotten to her space. Ji hyo swears there’s only a centimeter left before their noses touch, granted, Jong kook’s aquiline nose is a bit long but not big, perfectly shaped and pointed. A cough – chef- and quiet snickers – the kids – pulls them out of the trance. The two teachers redden but both breaks into a small barely concealed grin.

Jong kook takes the knife to continue Ji hyo’s task and Ji hyo did not protest. She took over delegating the ingredients Jong kook chopped into pots or wherever it is needed. They worked smoothly, barely exchanging words. A soft noise, a grunt, a hum – without realizing it, they have started to create a wordless language that only they could understand.

The chef looks over the busy pair meaningfully as he sharpens his favorite knife.

---/:::::/---

Jong kook and Ji hyo started to look forward their daily cooking task. Sometimes one couldn’t make it because of a meeting or extra classes. The chef told them he could manage with the two scholars but the two did not relent and continued to participate. The students loved Kyung soo’s meals but they also loved the food prepared by their other guardians, tasting the effort and love in every bite. Besides, it might not be Kyung soo’s but the taste was new and as good.

Before they knew it, it was almost time for Kyung soo to come back. They haven’t really talked to their friend during the days he was away but the boy has assured the two teachers that he is fine and it is better than he expected. Kyung soo did not elaborate and they respected his wishes to tell them personally when he’s back.

The day of his friend’s expected arrival; Jong kook woke up earlier than usual. He robotically went through his usual morning routine except running. He could just run along his students later and he didn’t really need it to wake up his already alert body. He splashed cold water in his face and brushed his teeth briskly, staring at the image in the mirror.

If there was an apt background right now for him, Jong kook would say it would be ‘Man in Love’. He couldn’t hide it. He couldn’t stay away from her even if he knows he shouldn’t. And every day he couldn’t help but fall for her even more.

She worked well with him. Jong kook may be an idiot but he isn’t dumb and blind enough not to notice how synchronized they moved. Looking back, it all started during the play and the past week only polished it. He couldn’t imagine what more they can do after a longer time. She was smart in an unusual way. Ji hyo has a way of seeing the obvious way to things while Jong kook sees the complicated path and together they figure out the best way to accomplish a task.

When she’s not around the students Ji hyo is a bit crass. She is boyish but adorable and sweet. Jong kook couldn’t help but smile fondly at Ji hyo’s tendency to zombie-walk into the kitchen every morning. After which she would forage for coffee like a blind pup looking for its mother for feeding. And when she’s around the students, she’s inspiring and she always surprises everyone with her methods. Jong kook knew all the rascals in Ji hyo’s advisory class. He was pretty surprised at how much those kids changed. He actually missed giving detentions to his regulars from class 2-C. Those regulars used to be there with him almost every day after class and now, there were days when he didn’t even need to give out punishments.

The first time Ji hyo stepped in RM High, everyone is excited to meet a girl. Now, everyone has fallen for the adorable, strong, fierce, smart, unusual and beautiful woman with so many contradicting qualities that made her unique. Qualities that had Jong kook falling for her fast and hard despite their past and the impossibility of a relationship between them.

And today there won’t be much reason to work with her anymore because Kyung soo is coming back. With a sigh, Jong kook dried his face and practiced smiling at the mirror.

Ji hyo woke up again before her alarm clock goes off. A thing that is fast becoming a habit. She told her father about it but the old man only that it is impossible because everyone just knows that Ji hyo is not a morning person at all.

As silently as Ji hyo could, she sneaked into the personal kitchens of their quarters and started rummaging through cupboards. She gathered the ingredients and carefully brought them down in the student hall kitchen. She was almost three hours earlier before chef would wake up and she hoped that it was enough time to accomplish her plans. Cracking her hands together, Ji hyo donned the apron and got ready to tackle the ingredients.

Ji hyo was kneading dough, creating enough mess to give the cleaners a heart attack when that smell invaded her senses again. She’s  gotten used to in the past week already and she still doesn’t question the why on her reaction to it –she’s become desensitized to it that it did not startle her much now (though it still made her heart skip a bit not that she’d admit that aloud). She looked up with a sheepish grin at the amused man leaning in the door way.

“Good morning, oppa.” She greets, lowering the last part of the greeting considerably. She still finds ways not to use the endearment around the students, feeling embarrassed for unknown (suspected but still in denial) reasons.

“Is that cookie dough?” he walks closer. She only nods and wipes away a bead of sweat in her forehead, smearing more flour in her face. Jong kook stops himself from chuckling at the very cute image before him. “Celebrating the last day of cooking eh?”

“Umm, sort of… I just wanted to do something special for everyone and maybe a cake for Kyung soo. Who knows what mood he’d be in when he comes back. I mean… he was pretty upset about the trip. So…” she explains then ends it in a cute shrug.

The statement halts Jong kook in his steps and he’s thankful Ji hyo couldnt’ see him right now. He’s pretty sure he looks like a big idiot who discovered that it is possible to fall in love with one person every minute. That there is no limit in how big love could be because here he is defying everything by loving her more and more.

Without a word, he washes his hands carefully and steps in front of Ji hyo on the other side of the island counter. He presses on the yellowish dough and for a while watches as Ji hyo’s hands stills. Hers was delicate, fair and very feminine. His was roughened and so much darker from working out and teaching sports. Yin and yang, he thinks.

He takes the dough and kneads as Ji hyo’s hands retreats. The two drifted into silence. Ji hyo prepared the baking sheets while Jong kook took over the much more physical aspects. He will miss this. The silent and easy partnership he had developed with her, the way a gesture spoke volumes for them. A nod or a look… and that was all they need to tell a story – she understood him and he read her like a familiar book.

For the first time in his life, Jong kook was aware of how alone he was and that it was his choice to shut out everything. He learned that silence and loneliness was two different things. Silence is not always lonely… it could also mean content and happy. And loneliness is what he had all this time.

“You know when I first saw you… I called you Mr. Muscles in my head.” he looks at her at the words and she lets out a snort of laughter maybe from the incredulous expression on his face. Or maybe because it’s actually quite a funny nickname. Ji hyo only grins at him as he waits where the statement is going. “I learned your name but in my mind I still called you Annoying Mr. Muscles.”

“Wow, nice to know that Mr. Muscles was actually not a compliment.”

“Well, you are a walking bunch of muscles Mr. Kim.”

“So all this time... I didn’t know at all, but your hobby is to call people nicknames in your head? wow, didn’t know you can be rude Ms. Song.” he tries for a hurt expression but ends up grinning at her, the dough now just resting at the counter as he continued to hold her gaze, his heart daring and wanting more than he should have.

But then, like the coward he is, Jong kook breaks the magical moment and goes back to kneading. Insecurities crept up his heart until he got too curious and foolish to ask. “Ji hyo-yah, am I…” he tries to focus on the dough but knew how vulnerable he looked right now, “am I still annoying to you?” he mutters while dreading the answer to his question.

“Yeah,” she replies and it felt like a bucket of ice cold water was dumped on him.

“I see… I’m sorry if I annoy you Ji Hyo. Honestly… I am really bad at socializing with people. I guess I’m only good with weights and treadmills.” He smiles deprecatingly though he hopes it looked happy enough for Ji hyo not to notice the pain he’s feeling right now.

Jong kook thought they were at least friends now. Even if he couldn’t have her—

“You are annoying but not so much anymore, oppa. We don’t always see eye to eye but… I like working with you and that annoyance… it’s not a bad thing anymore.”

“Really? Why... I mean, I annoy you. How can that be good at all?”

“It challenges me. It makes me think… I do better and I am not prideful enough not to admit that it helps me be better. And those muscles are actually useful because we’re still going to bake that cake and I don’t see any mixer in here.”

Jong kook couldn’t help the smile breaking out in his face as he nods eagerly and it didn’t help that she was also smiling at him. His traitorous heart was still scared but it wanted to trust and hope more than it wants to retreat. Not when she’s looking at him like that. Not when the moment just feels so right… not when he could finally let himself enjoy a little bit more time with her.

Not when the pain he will feel one day doesn’t matter anymore… because he is so happy right now.

The PE teacher could only watch Ji hyo make a mess of the flour, his eyes radiating a silent happiness. Ji hyo returns it with her own brilliant grin. He laughs and finds himself covered in white powder, a red and brown syrupy substance decorating his frilly apron, and just like that they fell into silence. Working together seamlessly without words.

I'm back from a series of small weekend vacation... and seriously I just couldn't write the past weeks because it was so hot it feels like my brain is overheating. But the weather is getting tolerable so you guys can expect the regular weekly updates. I am really determined to finish this story so I hope you'd forgive me for the slow updates. I don't plan on going over 40 chaps so we're near the end. Thank you for reading and happy summer :)

-And I really appreciate the kind words about my grandpa. I went to the province to attend his funeral and had a family reunion too with the family. We're kind of scattered all over the world so there's some 1st degree relatives that I've only seen once in my years. It was fun but I could really feel that we lost the tribe's leader. I rarely see everyone so it's still nice even if the others could fly home.