She was just a photographer: a photographer—in training. She went to university like everyone else her age did, attended classes, gossiped with friends, slaved herself at work; she just turned the tender age of twenty, breaking out of her teens, experiencing life. One thing she had never planned to change—her love, passion, and devotion to the future leaders of the hallyu wave, EXO.

Just like any other fan, she gushed over fan taken pictures and accounts, immersed herself in the world of fan-fiction during the night, and slept peacefully through the melody of her favorite songs. But what kept her apart from the average fan? She attended fan signings, concerts, venues, and more, but has she ever received an autograph? No. Front row seats? Not really. High touch—yeaaah…no.

She stood on the sidelines, with her DSLR in her hands, ready to capture his face. His emotions, interactions, smiles, and frowns. What exactly did she do for a living? Ah, that’s right, she was just a photographer…in training.

Two years ago, she created a fan site, solely for the purpose of posting her HD close-ups of him. Two years ago, she edited and stamped her watermark on the photos after every fan-signing, every concert, every event—you name it. She had numerous files on her desktops with the name and dates of each event, carefully to choose her favorites to go on the site.

Two years ago, she never expected her fan site to become the top fan site for her favorite member—Xiumin.

Kim Minseok, stage name: Xiumin. She dedicated the hours of the night updating other fans with such photos. She admired him with a passion. Looked up to him. And if it were a religion, she’d worship him. But she was not obsessed, no. She focused on her life, her future career—even turning her studio apartment into a complete photo studio, sleeping on the wooden floor at night, because a bed was not needed. Passionate she was, and her dreams were always first, she just took this part of her life as a path to her future.

She would practice shooting at different angles at every event, capturing him in a new light. These photos never did any justice for him, she thought, but to others, they were breathtakingly wondrous.

She acknowledged the fact that she had talent, but there was always room for improvement.

It was a hot afternoon and she slouched in her spinning chair, too lazy to start on any assignments from her university and far to tired to get up and take scenery shots. Today she would relax, she declared, but she found herself typing into the familiar url into the web browser.

As she signed in, she smiled at the messages other fans would leave her, telling her how amazing the photos were and how much they look up to her. She could only chuckle at the replies of ‘unnie this’ and ‘unnie that.’

It was cute. His fans were always the best—to her at least, being a little biased in her mind. She declared Buns her favorite amongst the fans. With the theory that fans often reflect their bias, she couldn’t help but agree to it. Of course the other fans were just as amazing, but she couldn’t help but feel a motherly aura around her fellow Buns. They were patient, caring, and looked out for one another.

As a sigh escaped her lips along with a small smile, she read a post directed to her with hundreds of comments trailing behind:

ANNOUCEMENT: I HEREBY DECLARE THAT BIG UNNIE TAKE A BREAK FROM THIS WEBSITE AND FULLY ENJOY A FAN SIGN WITHOUT THE HASSLE OF TALKING PHOTOS FOR OUR BENEFIT! ALL THAT AGREE, SAY I!

Her eyes turned into crescents as she read the comments trailing after the post agreeing with the said message. A bunch of ‘I agree!’ and ‘Unnie, thank you for your hard work!’ followed and for once, she danced her fingers across the keyboard and replied,

Just this once, okay?^^

A flood of encouraging messages follow and her heart swelled at the kindness of her fellow Buns. She made a mental note to herself to post ‘exclusive’ and ‘unseen’ photos of Xiumin, just for them.

She always remained anonymous. No one knew her name; no one knew what she looked like. She was always in a flock of other fans with their cameras, so it wasn’t that hard on her behalf. She wasn’t one to boast about herself and she liked the quiet. She always hated those that boast around like they knew everything. It was annoying and bothersome and sometimes even hurtful to other fans. She couldn’t understand why someone would go to that extent.

As she closed the browser and shut her computer down, she couldn’t help but feel excited as she thought about the next upcoming fan signing event. It would be her first ever face to face meeting with her beloved idol and the butterflies in her stomach had yet to cease.

Two weeks had passed and she found herself caught in line with pre-teens, teens, and a few people her age cramming to get inside the venue. Only the first hundred would be able to get in, and she was lucky to be in the front. She always was. Having gotten used to waking up early for classes, she became a morning person, an early, if you must.

She was smiling although being shoved here and there. She apologized for things that weren’t her fault and signed in content as she thought about the ‘fan girl life.’ Ah, indeed it was a hard life. She ducked her head down and chuckled to herself just as tickets were being passed out. She smiled and bowed politely at the middle aged woman who looked tired and restless, and the woman nodded in greeting as she continued to walk down the line, passing out the tickets.

An hour later, the doors opened and she was no longer crammed in the long line, but still bumped shoulders now and then with other fans. They talked to her animatedly about their bias and she would return the gesture, exchanging minimal words and mumbling her biases name.

Soon enough, ear piercing screams could be heard throughout the venue and she clapped as loud as she would, whilst balancing their newest album in her hand. She could see tears escaping out of a few fans and she herself started to tear up.

They were so passionate and loving. Supporting these twelve through whatever, whenever. She couldn’t help but feel proud to be in the mix. If only she had her camera here to catch the faces of these fans, she thought to herself.

Louder screams erupted as soon as the twelve introduced themselves. Her eyes landed on the all too familiar boy who sat between Luhan and Kyungsoo.

She watched as he scanned his eyes around the venue, waving and making a few hearts to the fans. Her heart ached simply because of the kind gesture. He looked her way and she, as well as those around her waved at him. He waved back and in her mind as well as those around her, that wave felt personally for her. She let her gaze trail along the table, looking at each individual member, smiling to herself as they interacted with each fan. But as always, her eyes went back to his, her mind cooing at how adorable he was.

Click.

That would have been a perfect shot! She thought, imitating a frame and squinting one eye towards him. She’d much rather be at the sidelines right now. Watching from a distance would always be enough for her, but just this once, she wanted to spoil herself.

She was close to the front when a commotion in the back started. Those that weren’t allowed in the fan sign was still allowed at a much further distance, but just enough to see the twelve. She turned her attention along with everyone one else to see a girl squatting and crying and three girls around her glaring down. The security was too busy trying to hold the other fans back, so they let whatever was happening, continue.

She turned back towards the front, noticing the boys looking concerned, but could only shrug it off as managers and coordinators assured them it was nothing.

She bit her lip as she glanced back, her turn almost next. She could see a few staff members trying to clear up the issues, but was failing and she could only stare at the girl crouching down with her face in her hands, sobbing loudly as a small circle formed around her. Someone touched her shoulder and a man motioned her to go up stage. She followed his hand to see a smiling Chanyeol waving at her, waiting for her to step up. She was about to get on stage, but abruptly stepped down and bowed towards the man as well as Chanyeol as she made her way to the back, where the commotion was.

“Excuse me, pardon me.” She mumbled as she pushed her way through the line of fans waiting for their turn. The line had lessened and the gap between the fans in the back and the fans in line had increased. She glanced at the worried faces of the staff trying to calm a few girls down and quiet down the one in tears and she could only clear , a different aura admitting from her.

“Is everything okay?” She turned to a staff who looked frantic. Normally, security would be enough to kick the fans out, but seeing as their hands were full trying to keep the other fans back; they weren’t sure what exactly to do.

Being a leader in past group projects and assignments had given her an aura of authority and she bowed to the staff, towards the girls.

“Is there a problem?” The girls who seemed to be arguing looked her up and down and scoffed, crossing their arms as their noses pointed to the girl crying.

“She’s the problem!”

“She tried to sneak in line!”

“She cut in front of me!”

“She’s just a sasaeng!”

She raised a brow and the said girl cried louder shaking her head. At this point, a headache was growing and she glanced back towards EXO to see them still smiling and signing, although some snuck glances at the commotion.

She held her hand up and the girls silenced. She crouched down and tilted the chin of the said girl up, making her look directly into her eyes.

“Is everything they said, true?”

“N-no..I—“ She was cut off by protests and the elder sent a glare their way, immediately shutting them up.

“Continue, sweetheart.”

“I..I came f-from..d-d..Daegu…and I wanted to get my s-sister an auto…autograph. S-she’s in the h-h-hos-hospital a-and..” The elder cut her off and stood her up, dusting any dirt from her bottom and shoulders as if she knew her for a while, and pulled out her ticket to the girl.

The girl looked up to her, more tears forming in her eyes.

“U-unnie..I can’t—“

“Don’t cry, your oppas wouldn’t like that, now would they?” She cupped the girls cheeks and wiped away a few tears, fixing any stray hairs and tucking them behind her ear.

“Go before I change my mind.” Her voice hard with a playful underlying tone. She found herself being suffocated in a tight hug and she patted the back of the girl softly before pulling away and repeated as she did earlier, wiping a few tears of the girl and smiled at her constant utter of thank yous.

Watching the girl wave off and run into line, a shout of angry fans were heard and pushing forward.

She straightened herself up and turned towards them, a dark aura around her and misting over her eyes.

“That’s not fair!”

“Why did you do that, she was obviously lying!!”

“You stupid bit—“

“Are you really a fan?” She stated, raising a brow at the girls.

“Of course we are! How dare yo—“

“The last time I checked, a fan was someone who supported their idol no matter what. Respected other fans, and certainly do not harass other fans. You are all here for the same reason and you gang up on one girl who is here for the exact same reason: to see the faces of twelve boys. You act like deranged animals in a zoo clawing at each other’s throat for a chance to see them and to stopple over anyone and anything that gets into your way. ‘We are one.’ That’s who they are,“ gesturing to EXO behind her, “That’s who WE should be. Do you think they’ll take notice of you if you’re screaming and hurting each other? Do you think it makes them feel good? I’m sure as hell it doesn’t and you should all be damn ashamed of yourself for calling yourself a fan. If this is the definition of what a fan is, then I don’t want to be a part of it. Don’t tarnish the names of these wonderful boys for your selfishness. They’re here for YOU. For US. They took time away from their busy schedule to come here and you create havoc by ganging up on ONE fan.”

She eyed each and every fan as they held their head down, knowing her words were sinking in. She then turned around and began apologizing profoundly to each staff member and security guard, taking all blame for today’s events. They smiled at her and patted her back reassuringly as she handed one of the coordinators her card, saying she’d pay for any damage caused by the fans.

“They didn’t mean it and I’m sure they are feeling guilty, I will take full responsibility for it, so do not hesitate to call.” She bowed again and again, even turning once towards the boys and bowing in their direction, not meeting their wondering gaze.

She soon left the venue, sighing as she felt agitated and annoyed. She made her way to her favorite café, ordering a slice of cheese cake and milk tea boba.

Back at the venue, the fans had calmed and everything was back in order. The crying girl from earlier now stood in front of Xiumin, red tinting her cheeks.

“Were you crying?” He asked, as he signed her album.

“I was. “ She mumbled, “but the unnie from earlier made everything okay.”

“What happened?” He asked, curious. As she was about to answer, she was rushed aside by the staff to keep moving and he let out a playful pout, making the fan in front of him squeal. He chuckled at her reaction, momentarily forgetting about the other girl.

As they relaxed in the confinements of their tinted van, their manager slipped into the driver side, shaking his head and mumbling curse words.

“Hyung? What’s wrong?” Xiumin asked.

“Aish, those fans of yours causing damage to some of the property. Ungrateful little..” He trailed off as there was a knock on the window. The manager grumbled and put on a smile, rolling the window down.

“Is there a prolem?”

The coordinator shook his head lightly and answered, “The damage has been taken care of, so you don’t have to worry.”

“Taken care of? By whom?” The coordinator handed the card to the manager before bowing and heading off.

“Seems like your asses has been saved by…” squinting his eyes and pulling the card away, he read the name slowly, “Lee..Hana. Lee Hana, thank you very much!” He kissed the card and placed it into the cup holder, only to be grabbed by Kris in the front seat.

“Why would she take care of it for us?”

“Who is she?” Luhan chimed in? Kris shrugged and handed back the card towards him. As Luhan grabbed it, Xiumin leaned over to look at it.

“Simplicity Photography?” Luhan mumbled before the manager spoke up, “apparently, she was the girl who stopped those damn fans of yours in the back. Took the blame in their name.”

“But she’s a photographer?” Chen chirped, tilting his head.

“Photographer, shmographer, she saved your asses. Be thankful. I’ll get someone to send her an autographed album or something.”

A chorus of ‘mms’ and ‘yes’ came from the van and Xiumin took the card out of Luhan’s hand, typing in the website into his phone.

He stared out the window waiting for his phone to load as another voice interrupted his thoughts.

“Holy , those are amazing!” Tao grabbed the phone from Xiumin’s hand and scrolled through the website, admiring the photographs. He clicked on the link that read autobiography and read the passage out loud.

“ “You don't make a photograph just with a camera. You bring to the act of photography all the pictures you have seen, the books you have read, the music you have heard, the people you have loved.”-Ansel Adams

A photograph is more than a thousand words, more than a memory, and more than a piece of paper. A photograph is love for who you are, who you can become. It’s a moment for the future you to look back at and think to yourself, ‘Am I the person I wanted to become?’ A photograph is the capture of emotion. It speaks when you look at it and sings when remember it. My name is Hana Lee and although I’m a photographer in training, I take pride in what I do, capturing the real emotions of a moment. Sometimes words just aren’t enough to express what you feel, and that’s where I step in. My name is Hana Lee, and I’m a photographer in training.”

“Hyung, I think I’m in love.” Chen scoffed and hit Taos head, before grabbing the phone out of the youngers hand and scrolling through the images.

“Woah. These are good.”

“Let me see!” Lay grabbed the phone next and awed, pausing at one photo.

“Hyung…isn’t this you?” he asked in broken Korean, handing the phone to Xiumin.

“What?”

Xiumin looked at the photo of himself and tilted his head. Upon reading the caption below, his heart smiled

Kim Minseok, stage name: Xiumin
My inspiration.

“SHE’S A BUN?! NOOO—“ Chen hit the back of Tao’s head, earning him a punch in the gut. Kris held out his hand and Xiumin placed it in his. Kris raised a brow and smiled softly.

“This is really good. Hyung look.” At a red light, managernim glanced at the phone and eyes widened.

“Daaaaaebak* Xiumin, your fans are the best!” At this, Xiumin felt proud and felt the card being pried from his hands as the manager stuck it in his pocket.

“Hyung..why?”

“Future reference.”

After getting off the phone with the coordinator from the event, she smiled in satisfactory, at least being able to do this much for the boys. She frowned at the thought of not being able to see them up close, but this was enough to fill that spot.

She browsed her website again and stared at the messages about the fan signing and laughed as they gossiped about the ‘badass unnie at the venue.’

She posted a few unseen photos of Xiumin and shut her computer off, heading to bed.

A month later, her business phone rang and she pushed her chair towards the phone,

“Simplicity Photography, you are speaking to Hana.”

“Hana Lee?”

“Yes, this is she? How may I help you?”

After hanging up, she held her hand against her jaw, preventing it from dropping any further.

She replayed the phone call in her mind, letting out a screech of happiness,

“My name is Jihyun, a representative from SM Entertainment. I’m calling to see if you have any available openings for Saturday? We have a simple concept theme for the preparation for the next album of EXO, and would like it for you to shoot it—hello? Hana-ssi?”

“Yes, I’m here. Saturday I seem to be free from 7AM to 9PM. Is that alright with you? If needed, we can extend Saturday and Sunday.” She flipped through her agenda, scribbling the appointment and finished the arrangements with Jihyun, before hanging up with a ‘have a nice day!’

She rolled around the floor of her studio before crashing into her desk, her desk clock landing on her stomach.

“Oh crap! I’m going to be late for class!!!”

The next few days were hectic for Hana. She was constantly on the phone with the stylist, and met him a few times to discuss the clothing. They had a few disagreements here and there, but in the end, was able to come up with the options.

It was D-Day and her palms were sweaty. She had their clothes pushed up against the back wall where she placed a curtain to divide the main studio and ‘dressing room.’ She detest of any make-up and hair stylist, saying that it was on her part to take care of that.

The doorbell rang and her once quiet studio was now filled with laughter and music. She put her professional face on and began working on the boys hair and make-up. Dabbing them with as little make-up as possible and making their hair look as natural as its normal state.

You found trouble with Lays hair, seeing its natural curly state was cute, but taming it was another story. After a few minutes of wrestling with it, you sent him off to get dressed and step in front of the last member, blush forming on your cheeks.

“Hello.” You smiled and began dabbing light bb cream on his face, squealing inside as your fingers touched his cheeks. He chuckled and created small talk, making it easier on your part to listen and make noise of agreements at his questions.

By the end of the day, you became exhausted, treating the six boys and staff to chicken and pizza for their hard work. They turned down at first, but seeing as three boxes of pizza and four boxes of chicken had already arrived and been paid for, they couldn’t detest.

She stood aside as they gathered in a circle and talked, laughed, joked, with each other. She took the chance to sneak shots of their facial expressions and smiles.

She couldn’t help but feel content, until a voice behind her startled her, causing her to drop her beloved DLSR.

“Oh no!” She bent down quickly to pick it up and frowned as the crack on the back of the screen was too horrible to fix.

“I’m so sorry! So so so so so soory! I’ll pay for that, I promise!” Xiumin mumbled frantically as he reached for it. She smiled a sad smiled and forced a laugh, telling him it was okay.

As she placed the camera on her desk, taking out the memory card, she couldn’t help but feel a bit down. The atmosphere changed and she was quick to act on it, grabbing a slice of pizza and stuffing it into ,

“Oh my god fooooooooodddd~” The others laughed and joined her, going back to what they were doing and she smiled widely, pushing the thought of her camera behind her.

She gossiped with Wook, the stylist and instantly they clicked, exchanging numbers and such. She stated proudly that Xiumin was her bias when they asked and he blushed, still feeling guilty for startling her earlier. She blushed when they to sit next to him and soon enough, she found herself shoulder to shoulder with the said.

He smiled at the contact and they erupted into cheers. Boys will be boys, she thought and smiled.

As they bid their goodbyes and a few hugging her tightly, she bowed and made a call signal to Wook and he chuckled, nodding widely giving her a thumbs up. She was about to close the door when he appeared, 

"Hana?"

"Xiumin? why are you still here?"

"I wanted to make it up to you, for breaking your--"

"It's fine! Really! I'll buy a new one soon!"

"But still I--"

"Nope!" She put a finger to his lips.

"At least let me--"

"No way!" Cutting him off again.

"Hana, please--"

"Nah uh~"

"Can I take you out?" He mumbled quickly before she could cut him off.

"Nop--wait what." She put her hand down and stared at him as if waiting for him to say he was joking but there was no sign of joke in his face.

"At least let me take you to dinner. I owe you this much."

"You don't have to, Xiumin-ssi. It's okay. Honestly." She softened and placed a hand on his shoulder.

"But what if I want to? What if I'm interested in getting to know you?" 

"I-I..yo-you--what?" She studdered not being able to process what was being said until she felt lips against her cheeks.

"I'll call you." And with that, he walked backwards, waving to her and disappearing down the hallway. 

A/N: SO I had this dream and it was bugging me so I had to write it and I think its really lame but it wouldn't stop bugging me and this is where my dream ended so I'm ending it here too. LOL its not edited so yeah!