Sunbeam penetrated through my eyelids. Slowly I opened my eyes. I saw Donghae. My right hand was enveloped in his but he was not looking at me. He’s sitting on a chair beside my bed checking his cellphone.

I glanced up and saw his face. He’s smiling and weeping at the same time (yes that’s possible).

Moments later he shifted his eyes to me. “How many messages did you intend to send me Hyukkie?” His smile was my best medication.

“… I … don’t know…” as many as it takes…

We looked at each other for some time. I gripped his hand tighter and said. “Donghae… allow me to say sorry again… I was just kidding… There’s no way I would have meant that… that we’re only colleagues…”

Donghae kneeled down beside the bed and held my hand with both his hands. Softly he said. “Hyukkie you know… jokes like this… especially from you… always freak me out…”

He closed his eyes, pressed my hand gently against his cheek and continued. “Do you still remember the first time you did that? When you said we may never meet again?”

When? When did I say that?

While I didn’t respond he opened his eyes to look at me. Upon seeing my bewildered expression he pouted. “Back in the trainee dorm. The evening before I was about to make my 1^stdebut, which was cancelled later on.”

Oh… Right… you rushed into the bathroom and cried…

Only then I realized what those jokes really did to him. “Hae I’m sorry… I will never leave you. Pls understand that. I promised…”

He smiled upon hearing those. “I promised you as well. Why did you freak out these couple of days?”

I could only look at him. Why?

We didn’t say anything more. It slowly came to a point when realization sank in. And then we burst out laughing. We’re both fools when it comes to us… we’re just too scared of losing the other…

Gently he rested one hand on my chest. His other hand took mine and put it on his chest. “Hyukkie and Donghae will never let go of each other right?” He smiled. I could feel his stare, though soft, look right into my soul.

I smiled when I looked at him and nodded.

“Then let’s make it no longer necessary to repeat our promise.” He pressed our hands against each other’s chests and said. “Now the promise is stamped on our hearts.”

Seeing him like that I could only laugh. He extended his hand to touch my cheek; which made me flinch. Though on the inside it pained no more but it still hurt where Donghae hit me.

“Oh sorry Hyukkie…” He stopped. And then his eyes brightened.

Slowly he crawled onto my bed and leaned forward, his eyes fixed on my face. “Hyukkie ah… I think I need to heal this as well…”

Knowing perfectly well what he was about to do I tried to push him away using my hand on his chest. But the moment I tried I was immediately captured by the spell again. Not to mention I was still weak at that moment, I didn’t stand a chance every time Donghae cast the spell.

I closed my eyes and felt his lips softly brush against my cheek. At the same time he whispered. “Hyukkie ah… pls get well soon… and don’t let this happen to you again…” He pressed his lips against my cheek. His lips lingered there for a while; and then he rested his head on my chest, hugging me gently.

Silence.

Donghae… actually where have you been these days?

“Just ask Hyukkie.” Donghae said.

If you don’t want to tell…

“Hyukkie why do you always have to think so much?” Donghae took my hand.

You will tell me when you want to…

“You think I will tell you right? But no this time I want you to ask me.” Donghae glanced up, looked at me and pouted.

I looked at him stunned and speechless. Did he really hear my heart?

“Yes I told you I can hear your heart. So now pls ask the question.” He’s giving me those pleading puppy dog eyes again.

It took me a few seconds to get my mouth and tongue to function. “D… Donghae where have you been these days?”

Slowly tears filled Donghae’s eyes. He hugged me tight and buried his face in my chest. His hands were gripping my shoulders tightly. Soon his tears wetted my shirt. His shoulders convulsed uncontrollably when he sobbed aloud.

“Hyukkie… I’m… so… scared…”

Bewilderment was the first thing that hit me. But soon it was taken over by something else.

Pain… excruciating pain… overwhelmed me. My body, my mind, my heart, my soul and all other possible parts of me were aching. It’s like whatever’s causing Donghae pain was doing the same to me.

And then in addition to pain, helplessness and frustration kicked in. Tears escaped my eyes while I looked at Donghae; crying in pain right in front of me. Except wishing that the pain I was experiencing was actually his, that I could actually share and take some of the pain away, I could do nothing to comfort him. Never had I hated myself so much… for being so useless…

Suddenly Donghae’s cellphone beeped. He jolted up. “Y… Yes… Hyung…”

Slowly I sat up while he continued. “Yes… I’m… I’m alright… Hyukkie’s with me… now…”

He gave me a sidelong glance and said. “OK… I know… Yes… I will apologize to him…” Closing his eyes and taking a few deep breaths he ended the call.

Moments later he came to sit beside me, wrapping me in his arms and rested his chin on my shoulder. “It’s Donghwa hyung. He reminded me to apologize… Hyukkie I’m sorry for hitting you… for losing my temper on you…”

I turned to look at him and his hair with my hand. When I was about to speak Donghae put his index finger against my lips. He shook his head and continued. “That day I went to the studio to tell you I had to go to Mokpo. My father was taken to the hospital. He’s in critical condition and… I was terrified… and when I heard you said…” Tears streamed down his cheeks.

I hugged him tight while he rested his head on my shoulder. Closing my eyes I wept with him. Donghae don’t cry… I’ll be there for you… when you need me… you will never walk alone…

The next days I never let Donghae be more than 3 feet away from me. The other members were confused and amazed seeing Donghae and me switch roles. Some even joked around saying Donghae finally managed to make Hyukkie clingy; and that we had become inseparable lovers. Guys there’s a reason…

The condition of Donghae’s father was not getting better. On the contrary, it’s getting more and more worrying. Donghae was kept from the news until very late. And by late… I hated to say that… meant there was not much time left…

I could still remember one year ago Donghae’s father visited us in Seoul. Everyone was charmed by Mr. Lee. There was so much life in him, so much energy when he walked and talked… It’s only one year…

It’s only one year… everything’s changed in a year…

We were recording a live show. The 13 of us were sitting on stage having some kind of interview. Donghae was behind me. As usual whenever this was the case he would just keep poking and bothering me. I was already used to it. From time to time I would turn around and we would smile at each other.

Suddenly the hair behind my neck and on my arms prickled. Something’s wrong…

I quickly turned to look at Donghae. He had his cellphone in his hand. Obviously he just got a text message. I took his hand (which was shaking) while he looked at me flustered and helpless. I could guess what that message was. Gripping his hand tighter I said softly (it’s a live show). “Donghae go!”

Something was definitely very wrong with him. “W… We’re… recording… live…” Why on earth would you be worrying about the live show? I stared at him and started pushing him. My voice got louder while I spoke firmly. “Donghae it’s now or never! Now go!!”

He didn’t move an inch and of course I didn’t want to make a scene in a live show. I could only urge him or beg him or whatever with my stare. Thank God finally the commercial break came. I dragged him up and started pulling him towards the back stage while he was shaking so violently that he could only grip me tight and lean against me.

Manager hyung stopped us. “Where are you going?”

“Donghae needs to run. His father…” The manager was quick to make the decision upon hearing this.

“OK. Donghae you can go. But Eunhyuk you have to stay. The group will perform shortly and being the lead dancer we need you here.”

I looked at Donghae. He shook his head and his grip on me was so tight it actually pained me. “… No… Hyukkie… No… Don’t leave me… I can’t do this alone… Pls…”

I looked at the manager again and pleaded. “Pls. Hyung… pls!!”

The manager shook his head firmly. I was considering the options (punching the manager in his face was one) when we heard a high-pitched scream.

“KANGIN!!! ARE YOU OK?! MANAGER HYUNG PLS COME OVER QUICKLY. PLS!!” Leeteuk…

I turned my head and saw Kangin lying on the floor with his hands on his stomach. Leeteuk was beside him. The facial expression on Kangin’s face was (not very) convincing.

Our manager frowned. “Why do things just all happen at the same time?” Quickly he rushed towards them.

When the manager was checking on Kangin Leeteuk looked at me and mouthed. “Now go!”

I nodded and mouthed back. “Thanks!” The next minute I grabbed Donghae and we rushed out of the studio.

Donghae you will never walk alone… we would conquer the storms together…

A storm too strong was something I never imagined…

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A/N: Sorry guys... I can feel your impatience stares... sorry SORRY!!!

A/N2: In the next chapter sth will happen to the promise... (Oh!!! I'm tying my hands now. I'm not supposed to disclose anything!! >_<)