The first thing I heard after a long period of pitch black was a monotone beeping sound. Something that was there although I figured I was completely unable to localize it, something that could have been distant or right next to my ear and I wouldn't have known where. It simply was wherever I was, and its presence, alarming at first, seemed to comfort me after a while. One minute I felt like looking for its source and its meaning because I found it disturbing, but the next made it sound like something that existed for my well-being, and I willingly surrendered myself to it, my eyelids getting heavier again without really having seen anything.
 

But just the second I was dull enough to drift off into the solid blackness again, I heard steps approaching me. „Kwon-sshi, are you awake? Kwon-sshi, don't doze off again. We want to stay awake for a while now.“ I wasn't really able to lift my lids enough to see who spoke to me, so to simplify matters I imagined my mother trying to wake me up in the morning just like she'd always done it in my school years.I felt like chuckling but my vocal chords didn't seem to feel the same way, so I kept both my eyes and my mouth shut. Five more minutes, mom. „Kwon-sshi, I know you can hear me. Open your eyes, please.“ I tried my best to shut the voice down to a level I could ignore, but it was no use. Someone clicked his fingers right next to my ear, then in front of my face, and when they were so close I could already feel them slightly streaking my skin, I opened my eyes with a groan.
 

And the first thing I wanted to do after that was just close them again, because it didn't take me long to understand the beeping sound and the strange voice now. It wasn't my mother, not even close, and I also wasn't anywhere close to anything I would have called home. I was lying in a clinically sterile, white sickroom, and the beeping came from a machine that recorded and plotted my heart beating. When I realized I had just woken up in a hospital, the once monotone beeping turned into hundreds of hounded screams. The doctor who sat on a chair next to me eyed the machine's monitor, then he looked at me, seriously trying to get me to face him calmly.
 

„Is everything alright?“, he asked. I pressed my hands onto the slightly foral bed sheets, longing to get a hold of the confusing situation. At least I was able to move now. I blinked a few times, trying to gain more and more conciousness back, before I answered. „Yes – I .. yes, I think so.“ I thought about it again, listening to my body once more. „My head is spinning and I feel a little numb here and there , but apart from that...“ The doctor nods and checks the machine's monitor again, his back me for a moment. „That's nothing unusual after having had a car crash“, he says casually, obviously trying to help me come down from my shock, but he achieved nothing but the opposite.
 

'Car crash'. These words rumbled inside my head, bumping against the inside of my skull, leaving invisible marks on my temples that turned into a throbbing headache just seconds later. Everything before the pitch black state came back to me in less than a minute, the memories flooding into my brain like a barrier in my subconscious mind had exploded, allowing the pictures to rush over me again. I've had a car crash. I fainted, propably bumped my head in the process, that's where the spinning came from. The earlier dullness suddenly turned into a sharp perception of everything around me. An accident with two cars involved on a stormy friday night.
 

The violent beeping hardly got through to me while I let my eyes wander around the room, not being able to focus on anything but just taking in the picture as a whole. I've had a car crash, and now I'm back to life as it seems. Or – back to consciousness. How long had I been 'away'? I lifted my arm, but something forbid me to escape the bed to search for something like a calendar or my mobile phone. I looked up and down my arm and found that I was on a drip. The liquid swayed when I moved and I gulped. The doctor faced me again with his dark, sincere eyes, not letting me escape his gaze either. „Kwon-sshi! Please calm down, get yourself together. There's no need to panic, you're safe. And so is your boyfriend.“ I felt my eyes widen at the word 'boyfriend'. Suho! The thought of him pierced my mind like a painful bullet.
 

„Suho … where is .. - where is Joonmyun?“, I hurried to ask, but the doctor didn't seem to cooperative. He frowned a little, his eyes sorrowful, and he avoided to look at me for a second. „Doctor? Please tell me“, I insisted, and he breathed out heavily before he gestured at the door. He clearly didn't want me to see my boyfriend, but I knew I couldn't rest until I knew how he was, and the worried look on the doctor's face wasn't exactly helping this urge. „It's the room next door.“